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Wed October 14, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
"Write drunk; edit sober." -Ernest Hemingway. Dangit, so that's what I've been doing wrong. This is your Fark Writer's Thread, sober editor edition
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Tue October 13, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Is there a phrase for drunk/high buying on Amazon? Submitter got high af 2 weeks ago and ordered a 25lb. box of asian snack mix, which was just delivered. What have you bought under the influence?
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Mon October 12, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
America is the Florida of First World Nations. Prove me wrong
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(Fark)
 
 
 
What is with STEM and Fandom categories, how long have they been here and has this already been discussed?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Do you have weird life advice somebody gave you? Subby's is don't fart in an elevator as it is wrong on so many levels
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Sun October 11, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Farkers who have dealt with floods, help. My house is under water after Hurricane Delta. Never flooded before. House likely is a loss, considering damage already done by Hurricane Laura. Any tips on what to be aware of or expect?
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Sat October 10, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Why does sci-fi always align deep space craft 'upright' with respect to one another? When unexpectedly coming upon another spacecraft shouldn't it be just as likely that they appear situated upside-down or perpendicular?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Well, a water main busted last night and the water has been shut off in my building. Can't shower; currently sitting here in my own filth. Give me some ideas to adapt
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Thu October 08, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Artwork, movies, celebrities having babies, and how to become Florida Man are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, September 27-October 3: Cow Edition
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Inversion therapy for back pain, yea or nay?
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Wed October 07, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
[SCENE: EDITOR collapses, hands clenching pages] EDITOR: Stay back, you demon commas, what do you even want with me? [MAN IN WHITE COAT] There here is. You're comma with us. [EDITOR] Nooooooo This is your Fark Writer's Thread, punctual edition
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Tue October 06, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Any jack o' lantern ideas you all come up with for Halloween yet?
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Sun October 04, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Has Covid cancelled Halloween in your area?
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Sat October 03, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Old military postings, new military postings, high fashion, and tomatoes are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, September 22-26: Oscar Edition
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Wed September 30, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
"Did not." "Did too." "Did not." "Did too." "Did not." "Did too." "Did not." "Mommee" This is your Fark Writer's Thread, reasoned debate and dialogue edition
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Let's do a funny Youtube video thread, shall we?
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Tue September 29, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
What Fark tag should be retired? 'Misc'? 'Strange'? And what should replace it? 'Doom'? 'Schadenfreude'?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Give a two-word phrase that captures some big news from the year 2020. Difficulty: must be in format of an Archie Comics story title (rhyming words, containing equal number of syllables). Example: "Mitch, biatch"
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Mon September 28, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
I can't wait
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Sun September 27, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Lighthouses, timekeeping, rappers' side hustles, and chicken sandwiches are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, September 13-19: Mystery Squash Edition
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Tue September 22, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
So how old is YOUR Fark account? Mine: Account created: 2002-05-28 14:45:13 (18 years ago) Damn
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Sat September 19, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Noodles are the best. Tell me how you like to prepare the delicious yum ropes?
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Fri September 18, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
I like ________. Fight me
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(Fark)
 
 
 
What is your favorite fall beverage?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Renaissance France, fast food, new wine, and what to eat in Canada are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, September 6-12 Baked Catfish Edition
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Wed September 16, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
How much do you tip during a civil war if the waitress is a redhead?
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Sun September 13, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
What time is it? Show me your wristwatch
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Do any Farkers remember a Kid's In the Hall / SNL / Some Skit Comedy Show (maybe it was Dave Foley) about "Speeky the seky linky" (speaking the secret language) it was a pig-latin thing as a TV commercial. My brother wants to show it to his kids
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Sat September 12, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Shock jocks, cryptozoology, and rock-and-roll memorabilia are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, August 30-September 5 The Robots Are Coming Edition
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Are you ready for some college football? Loozianna and Iowa State at Noon ET on ESPN. Duke sucks at Notre Dame @ 2:30 PM on NBC, and Clemson vs Wake Forest @ 7:30 PM on ABC. LETS DO THAT FOOTBALL
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Fri September 11, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
On this anniversary of the September 11 attacks, where were you when it happened? Any other stories from that tragic day? (LGT original Fark thread)
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Thu September 10, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Whatcha listening to?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
What's your odd eating habit confession? When nobody is looking, subby will eat a fast food sandwich top-down, layer by layer: bread appy, mini-salad, meat serving, etc
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Tue September 08, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
With where they are at right now, do graphics in video games really need to be worked on any more, or is it finally time to start putting the focus back on the writing and immersion instead of the shiny pixles
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Have you ever taken up a new skill or hobby to help cultivate a relationship, and had it remain part of your life long after the relationship was over?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
My favorite stupid movie scene is when a vampire blows up Prudhoe Bay by throwing a cigar into crude oil in the middle of an arctic winter. What's yours?
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Mon September 07, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Submit your entries for the FARKsonian Museum of Internet Memes
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Fri September 04, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
At your wit's end from social distancing? Need something different in entertainment and distraction? How about a new science fiction novel? Presenting: The Voyage of the New Beginning, now through Chapter 36 - "Triumvirate Plus One"
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Art, hotels, monuments, and weird crime are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, August 23-29: Why Does This Exist Edition
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Wed September 02, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
"Writing is a dog's life, but the only life worth living." ~ Gustave Flaubert. You never hear what a cat's life is, only that they have nine of them. This is your Fark Writer's thread, deep thoughts edition
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Mon August 31, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
How would you describe this past August?
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Sat August 29, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Video games, pop music, British government, and commercial airliners are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, August 16-22: Cinnadust Edition
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Fri August 28, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Due to mistakes on my part, I have to reinstall my OS and apps. Suggestions on what to do with my downtime to the right
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Living with the kids at the moment. Front yard of townhouse (small) is filled with wide leaf grass and clover. Neighbors have nice lawn. Should I just kill the clover and wide leaf and spread new seed? If so, the best approach?
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Thu August 27, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
How many of you FARKers use a Fitbit? If so which one?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Friday I'll be heading for elk camp. My hunting buddies always bring good food, which they insist I eat instead of my dehydrated meals. Please tell me your best camping food recipes so I can repay them this year. (Beer and whiskey are covered thx)
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Wed August 26, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
"Let be be finale of seem; the only emperor is the emperor of ice-cream." --Wallace Stevens. Huh, I could go for some fudge ripple right now. This is your Fark Writer's Thread, elliptical edition
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(Fark)
 
 
 
The Mrs. ordered me a music box from China. They sent a box of 200 assorted springs instead. Issued a refund and told me to keep the springs. What should I do with them? DIT
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Alright Farkers, I need advice on electrical for my basement. 10 new circuits, 16 can lights, 30+ outlets, and multiple switches. Builder estimate is $3k, 2nd electrician estimates $5k. Does it sound like the builder is going to half ass it?
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Tue August 25, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Do you ever find that you loved binge-watching a series you discovered late in its existence, but after you finished watching all of the existing content and having to wait, that you aren't intersted in watching any new content released later?
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Mon August 24, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Subby has seen a lot of advice column links in the Discussion tab for quite some time now. It seems Farkers are getting good at giving advice. What's the best advice you've ever given someone? What's the worst? Be as detailed as possible
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Subby has a Rancor holding a Bluetooth dongle next to a Ukulele atop his computer hutch. Your argument is invalid. What's hanging around your setup?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
I have a programming issue I could use some help on. Any chance of providing me with a green-light?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
I've got a bunch of rum-soaked almonds, cloves, and lime zest leftover from making falernum, is there any recipe I could re-use these in?
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Sat August 22, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's time to prepare your Republican National Convention BINGO cards, so MAGA and Dem friends and family alike can get in on the fun. What are your ideas for ridiculous quotes/events to fill in the spaces? And what about prizes?
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(Internet Archive)
 
 
 
News: In an action that is in no way an economic canary in the coal mine, Comenity is closing Wayfair credit cards on 9/11. Fark: ALL OF THEM (page changed, link now goes to archived copy)
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(Fark)
 
 
 
What's the best bread in the world?
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Fri August 21, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Beer, buildings, balloons and blue things are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, August 9-15: Beans Edition
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Tue August 18, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
CSB theme: that time you pulled off an amazing feat of knowledge at a trivia contest or game or something, whether by sheer dumb luck or otherwise
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Mon August 17, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
I can't seem to keep a job for longer than 6 months. I can't take repetitive routine or glaring into a computer monitor for long periods of time without going insane. I recently quit a really well paying job because of this. What should I do?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
According to the Wall Street Journal, Summer '20 doesn't have an anthem yet. You know what you have to do, Fark
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(Fark)
 
 
 
In an effort to unplug from the news cycle a bit, I've been immersing myself in audiobooks lately. What are some of your recommendations? DIT
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Fri August 14, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Sweat, leather, beer, and classic rock are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, Aug. 2-8: Biker Edition
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Thu August 13, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Since some of us want to stay in instead of going to an amusement park, let's post videos of some of our favorite rides, shall we?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
It's about time for Fark to pass mustard for once. Reveal your mustard secrets. Share your favorite brands. And does anyone make their own mustard? Is that a thing? (...yes, I know...)
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Tue August 11, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
What's it called when you know you're 100% correct but still feel like an asshole for being a dick about it?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Subby's getting a new bathroom but unfortunately this means using a Port-A-Potty in the back yard while it gets gutted and remodeled. How can I make this a less crappy experience?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Do you store your condiments in the refrigerator?
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Sat August 08, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Driving hazards, kitchen gadgets, and a ton of pop culture references are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, July 26-Aug 1: The Other Mask We Wear Edition
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Fri August 07, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Apparently, Walmart is now use their parking lots as drive-in movie theaters. What would be your People of Walmart themed double feature? Are you a block of government cheese or turkey leg snacker? Would you dress up, or show up in pajamas?
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Thu August 06, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
I am told I am supposed to rest my meat after cooking. But has anyone done a test of this? Cook a bunch of roasts, then slice and weigh them 0, 5, 10, and 15 minutes rest time. I am not sure I am buying this theory
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Wed August 05, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
"I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done." -Steven Wright. Yeah, but the real trick is getting them all in the right order. This is your Fark Writer's Thread, numbers edition
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Mon August 03, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
If you know of a restaurant where several employees have come in direct contact with people who have tested positive for Covid-19 yet the owner refuses to shut down and actively encourages them to still come into work who do I report this to?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
"Don't worry, I've done this a thousand times." Tell us about the one time you screwed it up
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Will already-dwindling pre-pandemic churchgoers realize life is better without mundane weekly services treating them like mindless sheep? Is Covid-19 the death knell for Sunday Mass? And what is best way to deprogram after decades of indoctrination?
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Sat August 01, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Water hazards, contract killers, strange accidents, and the space race are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, July 19-25 Batletoads Edition
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Fri July 31, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Most disturbing thing that you have seen or encountered in a locker room. For Subby, that would probably be the guy who sat in the whirlpool tub gobbling a large tin of sardines while listening to an Elmo the Muppet album on a pink boombox
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Wed July 29, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
The clock is ticking down, the lights are dimming, and the bartender looks ready to announce Last Call. This is your Fark Writer's Thread, right before the Fark Fiction Anthology deadline edition
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Tue July 28, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Favorite nonsense word that you personally came up with. Subby's is "borgengromph"
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Subby can't whistle. Subby can't blow a bubble with bubblegum. We all know Subby's a loser, but what about you? What common things can you inexplicably not do?
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Sun July 26, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
In these trying times, give advice...difficulty, ONLY using lyrics
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Sat July 25, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Long time Farker quantum_jellyroll has crossed the Rainbow Bridge. He was a Caturday regular, a Photoshopper extraordinaire and bane of the pol tab. Come join us in remembering him on Caturday. RIP dear friend, we shall not see the likes of you again
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Fri July 24, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
How many mice is a moose?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Okay, so I have a theory and I fully expect you all to mess it up, but I need more data. If there was nothing barring you from enjoying either, do you prefer alcohol or pot? Are you an introvert or extrovert?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
1970s rockers, 1980s movies, and 1990s TV shows are all the Fark Weird News Quiz, July 12-18: Why Are Stores Still Out Of This Edition
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(Fark)
 
 
 
It's tomato season again, so I must consult the collective wisdom of Fark. Do you slice tomatoes longitudenally or latitudenially for putting on a sandwitch?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
What is your favorite summer song?
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Thu July 23, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
"When a man becomes a writer, I think he takes on a sacred obligation to produce beauty and enlightenment and comfort at top speed." -Kurt Vonnegut. Huh, I can do bad puns slowly, does that count? This is your Fark Writer's Thread, speedy edition
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Who or what is the worst TV show character ever?
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Tue July 21, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
In Biden's America, ____________________
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Mon July 20, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Deadpool: Will the US have 150,000 Corona dead by Friday, Saturday or Sunday?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
So what is the best joke from any comedian that you ever heard?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
How are you coping with this weird summer so far?
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Sun July 19, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
If there is a defunct food or drink product you would like to bring back, what would it be?
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Sat July 18, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
If/when Joe Biden is elected, who would you like to see him appoint as Attorney General to head up a Trump Crimes Commission?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
If 2020 was an alcoholic beverage, what would it be?
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Fri July 17, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fast food, funny money, freaky weather, and the FBI are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, July 5-11: Jeez, It's Freakin' Hot Outside Edition
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Thu July 16, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
So, for anyone who has had the wonderfully fun COVID test, who here believes that President Kid Gloves gets tested "every Two days"? Subby isn't buying it
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Wed July 15, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
His prepositions are preposterous. His adverbs have an adverse effect on adjectives, and his cat has subjunctive claws. His metaphors are like similes and his similes are not. He is the strangest writer on Fark, and this is your Fark Writer's Thread
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Tue July 14, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
I need more creative uses for cumin besides tacos
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Sun July 12, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
If 2020 were a food, what food would it be?
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Sat July 11, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
What is your favorite sandwich from anywhere?
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Fri July 10, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Ladies and gentlemen, let's have a FARK swimsuit thread. All of you post a swimsuit pic of yourself no matter who you are
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Thu July 09, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Zoom meetings, food promotions, and Holy Fark How Many TV Shows Have Characters In Blackface are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, June 28-July 4: Online Gaming Edition
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Wed July 08, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
Some are born great, some achieve greatness, some have greatness thrust upon them, and for the rest of us, there's the Fark Writer's Thread. Which is great, in its own way
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Mon July 06, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
If there is one destination in America you have on your bucket list for places to visit, what is it?
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Thu July 02, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
What is your favorite song from a movie?
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Hard math problems, reopening venues, and of course Florida Man doing his thing are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, June 21-27 Visit from Mom Edition
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Wed July 01, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
*Click* *Click* Uh, is this thing on? Hello? This is your Fark Writer's Thread, returning from absence edition
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(Fark)
 
 
 
What is your favorite moment from a TV show?
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