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headlines found matching 'officials'
Sat February 04, 2023
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Isn't that when one is supposed to ski?
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
"Hey, pal, you can't just park that anywhere"
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
If you're going to write fake tickets to meet your quota that definitely doesn't exist, at least make sure to choose a person who isn't dead, officer
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri February 03, 2023
(Politico)
 
 
 
Kari Lake hopes to lose senate bid next
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KMBC Kansas City)
 
 
 
Animal Rescue League in Massachusetts seeks forever home for 1-year-old Clarendon, who was transported into the state illegally and needs space to grow into 600 pounds of bacon
source: kmbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWSB ABC 7)
 
 
 
Florida elevator really lets Ferrari owner down, should probably take steps to avoid it next time
source: mysuncoast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHON2 Honolulu)
 
 
 
"This is the pupil stage you see here from this stage and then they'll emerge as adults. As adults are when they feed on palm trees and are the most harmful to the palms here"
source: khon2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Of course, China needs civilian "airships" over Montana. No word on if it also has a six year old inside
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Donovan Mitchell of the Cavaliers ejected for showing off his dogeball skills
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu February 02, 2023
(WGAL 8)
 
 
 
Pentagon tracking Chinese spy balloon over US, waiting for 98 more before they release the nukes
source: wgal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
White rhino moves to Florida wildlife park. Fark: Shot and killed on first day in new home. UltraFark: Local orthodontists and dentists all claim alibis, blame park for not being able to contain it
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Cowlision takes out Tesla. Cow was in self-driving mode. Tesla investigating because steaks are high
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Law enforcement officials, gun rights advocates request clarification on Alabama's new permitless concealed carry law because it's a cluster fark
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Over 350,000 Texans without power after ice storm. This is not a repeat from every other previous ice storm in Texas
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed February 01, 2023
(BBC)
 
Video
 
Floating pirate restaurant now just a pirate restaurant
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC DFW)
 
 
 
Subby having deja vu while reading this from a cold dark house in Austin
source: nbcdfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Rio Tinto: "Ok PHEW found it, alright all good Don't ask any questions. Wow what a relief"
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue January 31, 2023
(Times Record News)
 
 
 
Texas judge lifts restraining order on sheriff who was sexually harassing female members of his staff, because what's the point of letting the ladies into your station if you can't pat them on the ass now and then, amiright?
source: timesrecordnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Not Some Refreshing Drink)
 
 
 
Large object crashes through wall of woman's home, narrowly missing her. OHHH YEAH
source: dakotanewsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(High Country News)
 
 
 
Tribal officials are looking to thermosyphons to keep the fat out of the fire. 'You can't put half a whale in a little home freezer'
source: hcn.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
After unseasonably mild winter, Eastern Canada to encounter "punch in the face" cold snap this week. Bonjour, vortex polaire
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon January 30, 2023
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Congressman takes to the floor of the House the have his own Fark thread about Chiefgate
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pro Football Talk)
 
 
 
NFL referees are so incompetent now, they can't even blame the right scapegoat for their mistakes
source: profootballtalk.nbcsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
Old and Busted: Secret woods porn. New Hotness: Secret woods grenade
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFSB Connecticut)
 
 
 
Officials suspect fowl play
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun January 29, 2023
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Dis-Assembly Hall
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Day 340 of WW3: The floodgates are poised to open. US military officials reportedly urging Pentagon to supply F-16 jets to Ukraine so the country can better defend itself from Russian missiles and drones. It's your Sunday Ukraine war discussion
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat January 28, 2023
(Live5 News Charleston)
 
 
 
A mother will help you move, a grandmother will help you move a body
source: live5news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Was this an attempted terrorist attack? A boozed up idiot? An ill conceived protest? Taking all bets. I also offer video poker
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri January 27, 2023
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Police bodycam footage of Tyre Nichols beating released, is as bad as was expected. [Graphic violence warning]
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
White House approves 16,000,000 Americans for student loan relief, tells Supreme Court: "Good luck enforcing your decisions with the army you don't have"
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Army Corps of Engineers releases renderings of a potential sea wall to protect the West Side of Manhattan against storm surges from climate change, seeks Snake Plissken's input
source: thecity.nyc   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some North Dakodan, eh)
 
 
 
North Dakota threatens to sue Minnesota if the Gopher State adopts green energy plan which would devastate North Dakota's fossil fuel reven-- er, "hinder its utilities"
source: minnesotareformer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
'You're going to see acts that defy humanity,' police chief says, as officials urge calm when Tyre Nichols arrest videos are released publicly tonight
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Faxed bomb threats paralyze Japanese schools. One can imagine principals staring at the office fax machine, waiting for the ring, the beep and the plasticy printout containing the next fateful fax setting up the bomb
source: wionews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu January 26, 2023
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Two vicious killers now being hunted across Ireland after bolting on train, could be anywhere. Fark: Prison officials let them out on temporary release. Ultra Fark: One has done this on three occasions before
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Colorado wildlife camera surrenders after the Kim Kardashian of bear selfies drops in for an extended sesh
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed January 25, 2023
(Livingston Daily)
 
 
 
"Yellowstone" country music festival in the works...just north of Ann Arbor, Michigan?
source: livingstondaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Air Guard general: Wingmen, personal servants. Same thing, right?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHDH Boston)
 
 
 
Live Free or We're Going Streaking
source: whdh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
Axios wouldn't bait-n-switch "Biden's new tax hammer" to describe "Stupid new GOP tax plan" would they?
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KMOV St. Louis)
 
 
 
Topless woman found next to headless Jesus
source: kmov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Day 336 of WW3: A number of senior Ukrainian officials have resigned or been fired by President Volodymyr Zelensky. This comes amid a growing corruption scandal linked to procurement of wartime supplies. It's your Wednesday Ukraine war discussion
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
"Putin's Chef" Prigozhin will die after being hit point blank by a hellfire missile during a drone strike after being given a massive LSD overdose, jabbed with a polonium-tipped umbrella and pushed out a window
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue January 24, 2023
(Philadelphia Magazine)
 
 
 
Philly needs lifeguards so badly they are reportedly hiring people who can't swim. The is not a headline from The Onion
source: phillymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston Post and Courier)
 
 
 
Today at the Alex Murdaugh trial it became apparent that elephant ears are a tasty delicacy in South Carolina. Subby would have thought they would be illegal to import, let alone sell in public
source: postandcourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Your dog wants steak... or else, motherfarker
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Attempted tripping? Now honestly what is that? Can you win a Nobel Prize for Attempted Chemistry?
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Biden administration has a second thought, says here come the M1A1 Abrams tanks to Ukraine
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(US Senate)
 
 
 
I suppose that's slightly ironic, given the source
source: cruz.senate.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Russia's new commander in the Ukraine is focusing on what really matters in this conflict: frequency of shaving
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon January 23, 2023
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
What do Texas and Pakistan have in common? Top 50 things to the right, latest one on the left
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Somehow the snow wasn't the whitest thing in New Hampshire this week
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida gas prices fall due to China
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Texas college students say 'censorship of TikTok over guns' says a lot about how officials prioritize safety
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun January 22, 2023
(Politico)
 
 
 
After conservatives bellowed "Whar is FBI search of Biden's house? WHAR?" enough times, FBI goes to Joe's Crab Shack in Wilmington and finds a few more classified documents
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Top border official has no understanding of boundaries, repeatedly crosses line
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Tesla builds submarine. The CEO's innovative screen doors worked too well
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat January 21, 2023
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
Don't look for your towel, because it's gone
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Upper Michigan's Source)
 
 
 
School cafeteria worker arrested after allegedly selling homemade goods
source: uppermichiganssource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri January 20, 2023
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
NBA front office to Warriors: We're sorry we missed those last five Celtic fouls in the last two minutes of overtime last night costing you the game. Our bad
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
You know what's bad? Getting a large hole in your pants and having it caught on video. You know what's worse? This
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Slaughterhouses under investigation for employing child labor
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
A sailor adrift for weeks off of Colombia survived by eating condiments
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 10 Boston)
 
 
 
Gonorrhea resistant to five kinds of antibiotics is a good reason to be careful around Mass holes
source: nbcboston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Pepperidge Farm remembers the day it learned it was moving to the 'hood
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu January 19, 2023
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Once again for everyone in the back: all the contract killers on the internet are FBI agents
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico (Europe))
 
 
 
Germany doesn't want to move tanks East (don't mention the war) to aid Ukraine unless the US also sends tanks (don't mention the war - I did once but I think I got away with it)
source: politico.eu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPIC Roseburg)
 
 
 
"We didn't mean to build a cat bridge"
source: kpic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Florida woman pulled from storm drain for the third time in two years. Previously she wandered through the tunnels for weeks and ended up in Texas. That's some underground network
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Politics)
 
 
 
Florida politician takes a crack at the "falling out of windows" shtick
source: floridapolitics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed January 18, 2023
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
For some reason, there's been a "high volume" of requests to illuminate this water tower
source: forsythnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Brookings Institution)
 
 
 
Deepfake challenges and disruptions in wartime will only grow, warns Winston Churchill. In related news, Abraham Lincoln wants you to try harder
source: brookings.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Florida Man: "I did not have no venomous snakes." Reporter: "What did you have?" Florida Man: "I had corn snakes"
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Sweet doggo gets crocheted 'ears' in hopes of being adopted
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
 
 
 
NFL rules analyst Gene Steratore, a 15-year NFL official, thinks more flags need to be thrown during games
source: triblive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Secretary at a Louisiana public school resigns after sending a text message in which she asked a coach to remind students that they had [N-word] day lol mark Luther king" Day off. Members of the school community were shocked, but not that shocked
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue January 17, 2023
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Sen. Coons meets with CEOs in Davos about Ukraine Aid: "Look, we now have lunatics in control of the U.S. Budget. So, some of you may have to step up and help finance the war in Ukraine"
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
China suffers record population loss in 2022 and they insist it's definitely not caused by that thing everyone thinks is the obvious explanation
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Phuc this, I'm outta here
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Let's go back to the Spring of 2016, when the world still had some decency and when Syrian refugee families shared a hotel with a furry convention where everyone had fun. No, not that kind
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pro Football Talk)
 
 
 
After on-field tantrum that helped Jacksonville defeat his Chargers, Joey Bosa doubles down, calls the officials power-tripping a-holes who had it in for him
source: profootballtalk.nbcsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon January 16, 2023
(USA Today)
 
 
 
How did that get in there?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
In Denver, change is inevitable. Except from vending machines
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun January 15, 2023
(Fox 8 New Orleans)
 
 
 
Woman pushing groceries down shoulder of Louisiana Highway 1 gets accidentally "bumped" by driver. Caring driver reports incident to sheriff's office. Woman gets arrested. Then it get sad
source: fox8live.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Tate didn't have 33 penis compensators, only 15, and now he has none
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat January 14, 2023
(Fox 29 Philadelphia)
 
 
 
More time off requested after 11 New Jersey police officers get treated for fentanyl exposure during search
source: fox29.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Day 325 of WW3: Air raid sirens sounded in Kyiv as Russian missiles hit the Ukrainian capital. Kyiv's military administration says critical infrastructure has been hit, but did not elaborate. It's your Saturday Ukraine war discussion
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri January 13, 2023
(MassLive)
 
 
 
Call me Officer Ishmael. Rare whale trifecta in play
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCNC Charlotte)
 
 
 
Madison Cawthorn goes on trial. Let's hope this starts the ball rolling
source: wcnc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
Another fake fentanyl exposure involving police, this one has the Yonkers, NY police headquarters going into total lockdown over some officer trying to get time off
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu January 12, 2023
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Monterey peninsula may become an island
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Law and Crime)
 
 
 
AirBnB turns into stab fest. Cleaning fee automatically tripled
source: lawandcrime.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
For the first time in history, a killer whale beached in Florida. Locals frantically concocting homemade explosives, sandwich recipes
source: wild955.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
The Golden Gate Screech is back. No word on the Carquinez Kapowski
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed January 11, 2023
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Category 55 Emergency Doomsday Crisis in Chatsworth: The sinkhole is growing. Leaving your homes could result in catastrophic damage, to you and to the very fabric of the universe. Okay, bye
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFAA Fort Worth)
 
 
 
Universal Studios announces a kid-themed amusement park to open in a Dallas suburb. Isn't every amusement park kid-themed?
source: wfaa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Mother giving birth in middle flooded riverbed rescued by firefighters, leaving many unanswered questions and a little poo
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(247 Sports)
 
 
 
The Deion Sanders era was to begin vs. Arizona State, but after Prime ran his big fat yapper about it, the NCAA nixed the game
source: 247sports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Xplore)
 
 
 
Cyberattack keeps Iowa's largest school district closed as authorities work feverishly to get both Kaypros back online
source: techxplore.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Skeleton of 7ft 6in man removed after 200+ years on display in museum. Officials and visitors are calling it a giant loss
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Haiti left with no elected government officials, only zombie government
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
NFL and Troy Vincent: There was never any consideration that we would continue the Bills/Bengals game after the Damar Hamlin incident. ESPN: Uh, you're full of $&+ and we have receipts. NFL and Troy Vincent: No comment
source: cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Here's the thread where we talk about there being no winner in yesterday's Mega Millions drawing and make snarky comments about a tax on stupid people being applied again this week
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGAL 8)
 
 
 
Subby was thirsty
source: wgal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue January 10, 2023
(CBS News)
 
 
 
If you see my reflection in a snow-covered hill on highway nine near Santa Cruz, well
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
The Fed would like you all to know the only green it gives two flying farks about is the paper for its corporate overlords
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Yet another Florida man fails to understand the concept of "don't stand on the tracks when the train is coming"
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Nashville Cop fired after having inappropriate sexual relations with 6 other on-duty cops. In a row
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Mexican authorities arrest cartel leader El Gato, which is Spanish for The Gato
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Apparently God didn't help Mike Pence's book sales
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon January 09, 2023
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
You thought Venice sinking into the sea was bad? Here's a sinking town in the Himalayas
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canadian government flip-flops again, decides to go ahead and purchase 88 F-35s from Lockheed-Martin - apologizes for any inconvenience
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
"Immediate Evacuation Order for all of Montecito, parts of Carpinteria, Summerland & City of Santa Barbara. LEAVE NOW"
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
Axios: President Biden will pivot to the center for 2024 bid, which implies he was on the left at some point
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stars and Stripes)
 
 
 
Pentagon instructs Defense Department organizations to remove names and items associated with Confederacy as recommended by congressional commission. Suck it, losers
source: stripes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Ashli Babbitt's mom takes a shot at civil disobedience
source: chicago.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Ruling that the storming of government buildings by Bolsonaro supporters could have only happened "with the consent, and even active participation, of public security and intelligence officials", Brazil's Supreme Court suspends the regional governor
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun January 08, 2023
(10 News)
 
 
 
Firefighters don't have to go far to fight arson fire - their own parking lot
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
 
 
 
Joe Hardy has lost his wood
source: triblive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Stay classy, Florida (Congress)Man
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Pssst, buddy. Wanna buy a painting?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat January 07, 2023
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Gov. DeathSentence activates National Guard after Cuban immigrants swamp Florida Keys. Wonder if he'll fly them to Miami instead?
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
TSA has had it with these monkey-fighting emotional support animals
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri January 06, 2023
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Old and busted: 6-year-old shot in school shooting. The new American-ness: 6-year-old is the school shooter
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The Great Salt
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DW)
 
 
 
Looks like Turkey's off the menu
source: dw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu January 05, 2023
(The Onion)
 
 
 
The House hasn't been this productive in decades
source: theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Australian border police discover six Kinder Surprise eggs full of cocaine in arriving traveler's chocolate factory. SURPRISE
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 San Diego)
 
 
 
San Diego Police have a trolley problem. Chidi Anagonye seen agonizing over whether to comment or not
source: fox5sandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Audacy)
 
 
 
My god, it's full of SARS: 28 out of 29 airplane lavatory holding tank samples test positive for SARS-CoV-2
source: audacy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
Mystery time: Dozens of solar powered antennae rigs pop up in the Salt Lake City foothills
source: ksltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed January 04, 2023
(CBS News)
 
 
 
With the Maine Lobster fishing back on, Wisconsin says 'Hold my beer' and gets the butter ready
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Fed signals that peon's are still making too much money and interest rates need to go up. Oligarchs seen lighting cigars with $100 bills nod approvingly
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
The devil made me do it, says driver of devil's ride, who drove off the side at Devil's Slide
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue January 03, 2023
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
New York officially solicits bids for three full-fledged casinos for NYC. No word yet from Robert DeNiro about reprising his role as a manager for one
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Bruce is selling his beach for $20M. Still not enough, but a good start for reparations
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PC Gamer)
 
 
 
In order to "save" its crumbling games industry, Russia is considering founding a company even worse than Electronic Arts, if that's even possible
source: pcgamer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Bay Area)
 
 
 
Car plunges 250 feet off cliff at Devil's Slide, 4 critically injured. Take a wild guess at what kind of car it was
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon January 02, 2023
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Tesla leads police on wild chase for 15 minutes. Then the driver wakes up and pulls over
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Police offer $10,000 reward for information on elderly couple's murders at retirement community with "extensive security measures and staff in place" because Benoit Blanc is way too expensive
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
"I didn't know that hanging on the rim would bend it," says likely long-time recipient of sports-based passing grades
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIII Corpus Christi)
 
 
 
You know the amount of oil that we reported spilled in Corpus Christie a week ago? Well, multiply it by three-and-a-half. Mea culpa
source: kiiitv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun January 01, 2023
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Mass. state police find suspect in a large tree with infrared camera. Article doesn't say why suspect had an infrared camera in a tree. Dumbass tag for the headline writer and the suspect
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCRA 3 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Old School: Firefighters rescue cat from tree. California: Firefighters rescue teens from tree
source: kcra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Asahi Shimbun)
 
 
 
No second date
source: asahi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Health officials urge locking the barn door after the horse has gone out to see the herd, done a little galloping, nibbled a spot a grass on the side of the road, and had a good roll on its back before returning to idle peacefully in its stall?
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Victorian England, weird Christmas traditions, women's sports, and the Olympics are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, Dec. 22-28: Happy New Year Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Suspect shot by police after attempting to go full Highlander near Times Square
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat December 31, 2022
(ABC News)
 
 
 
The right to have guns all over the place causes one Arkansas town to remove their citizens' rights to leave home after 8 PM
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Tesla workers ordered not to say bad things about management, pay discrepancy, and not to cooperate with officials reviewing working conditions
source: morningstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 30, 2022
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Businessmen give each other the Kissimmee of death after dispute
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
Today in 'why we can't have nice things' news: French homeless man who built his own awesome fairytale castle now forced to tear it down because it poses a danger
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 29, 2022
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Apparently Maverick and Goose are flying for the Chinese
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed December 28, 2022
(ESPN)
 
 
 
If they'd flown Southwest Airlines this never would have happened
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Self-proclaimed law student Kim Kardashian said that when she visited the Trump WH to advocate for prison sentence reform she "didn't know half of what anyone was saying" because they were using "obscure "attorney lingo" like "Clemency" and "DOJ"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 27, 2022
(Fox 10 Phoenix)
 
 
 
"If you wanna play unfrozen caveman lawyer on your YouTube channel, that's one thing"
source: fox10phoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
We're gonna have one of these "the Mega Millions lottery has now surpassed XXX dollars" every few weeks from now until the end of time, aren't we?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon December 26, 2022
(NBC News)
 
 
 
NBC News finds at least a half dozen people in Buffalo who don't know how to prepare for a winter storm when give a week's notice that it's coming
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
No one roaming in Buffalo
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
Apple says Mac is terrible
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun December 25, 2022
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Texas electricity prices spiked 400% in 24 hours, as factories printing "I did that" stickers used up all the electricity while Greg Abbott was busy owning the libs. This is not a repeat of 2021
source: markets.businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Man arrested after painting holiday messages to Biden and Obama, heyyy... those aren't holly berries
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat December 24, 2022
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Law Enforcement can no longer stand idle and presume we can arrest ourselves out of this epidemic"
source: lakemchenryscanner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHDH Boston)
 
 
 
Most of America has weather warnings this holiday season, but only a few of us have a coyote warning thrown in
source: whdh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Chattanoogan)
 
 
 
Come on baby, light my fire
source: chattanoogan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 23, 2022
(Fox News)
 
 
 
The Mayor is dead. Long live the Mayor
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Large dog tries to get out of vet appointment by biting a half-dozen people. Only technically successful
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 22, 2022
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Governor Abbot says Texas is ready for repeat of last year's cold. Presumably this means his trip to Cancun is booked and Minnesota will be bailing them out with socialized gas again
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
And nothing of value was lost
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Texas Tribune)
 
 
 
Texas power grid expected to hold against forecasted wind chills as low as -30F in some areas of the state. Never mind that each time it's failed it's been "completely unforeseen." Tag for the weather, not the grid
source: texastribune.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
The Admiral Kuznetsov, Russia's coal-rolling aircraft carrier, seems to be smoking a bit more than usual
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Russian forces in Ukraine increasingly made up of rustlers, cutthroats, murderers, bounty hunters, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, bank robbers and Methodists
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Wealthy Cape Cod residents frosty over Polar Express. I mean, it's not that they mind The Poors And Their Kiddos coming to Cape Cod to ride the Polar Express. That would be mean
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed December 21, 2022
(Out There Colorado)
 
 
 
"Higher than acceptable" methamphetamine levels in air ducts close Colorado public library disappointing the speed reading patrons
source: outtherecolorado.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
National medical director of the UK'S NHS tells people not to get "blind drunk," clearly not seeing the forest of holiday parties for the Christmas trees
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Mom help someone is cyberbullying me
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 20, 2022
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Michigan man who died in a trailer fire is remembered as a collector of newspapers. Well there's your problem right there
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
MTA project that was launched in the 60s, stopped in the 70s, relaunched in the 90s, re-relaunched in 2001 with completion promised for 2011 but delayed over a decade, is finally ready to...hang on, there's been another delay
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
Hero
 
Rescue one abducted child, get one free
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon December 19, 2022
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Is it still "friendly fire" if you do it on purpose and the units hate each other?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
Hero
 
Florida residents rescue a cat stuck in a storm drain. Hero tag makes a rare fill-in for the Florida tag on this one
source: eaglesanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Mexico's president blasts Peru state of emergency ...and US State Department
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Former TFG officials suggest battling the Taliban with theology. Fark : None have any actual theological training
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun December 18, 2022
(Deseret News)
 
 
 
As Great Salt Lake continues evaporating to pond-size, old shipwrecks becoming visible. Wait, they sailed ships on GSL? To where?
source: deseret.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Outside Online)
 
 
 
♫ Born on a mountaintop in Tennessee, sent a thousand miles 'cause she was too hungry ♫ Pooped in the woods and peed on every tree, this little bar returned 'cause she was free ♫
source: outsideonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
US to buy 3M barrels of oil to start replenishing reserves. GE, Honeywell and Owens Corning angry at being left out of the government bidding process
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 16, 2022
(Fox 10 Phoenix)
 
 
 
Not a good surprise
source: fox10phoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Partially clothed men dressed as elves, alcohol, a high school choir, and a dirty Santa... you sure know how to party for a school board member
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Inflatables are NOT people
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 15, 2022
(ESPN)
 
 
 
NFL discussing ejecting your team's best pass rusher from the game for gently brushing the helmet of that preening, over-rated QB
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
You might ask why, after decades of understanding the dire health risks posed by chemicals in the workplace, government hasn't done more to protect workers. But government officials like money, and corporations have it
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
'Biblical' drought likely to lead to more water restrictions? What, like no mixed fabrics, or picking only the men who lap water with their tongues like dogs to go to war?
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Hieroglyphics discovered on area man's face
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical Xpress)
 
 
 
US kids enfatten out of current obesity charts, forcing health officials to embiggen the size of their trackers
source: medicalxpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
*Pew Pew Pew* "Puff Puff Puff"
source: fox13news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Voice)
 
 
 
...and not 1 cop needed Narcan
source: dailyvoice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
Note to self: Do not argue with people on the bus who have a sword. They get all slashy
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed December 14, 2022
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
An Apple a day keeps you from starving to death after your car crashed in a remote canyon without cellular service
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Onion)
 
 
 
Can't improve on this headline: Nation Forgives Harvey Weinstein After He Gets Really Good At Football
source: theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Lucille, God gave me a gift. I shovel well. I shovel very well
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
WA state officials laying down an early marker for 'worst proposal for a vehicle use tax in place of gas tax' award
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Man arrested in murder of California cop's spouse in Kentucky, which gives him an alibi in the cop's killing in Kentucky, which also clears up the cop's stalking and burglary charges. Cue Bill Kurtiss voiceover
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Putin will hunker in the bunker to avoid Kremlin flu epidemic. That's their story and they're sticking to it
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 13, 2022
(KRON 4)
 
 
 
Yosemite 'Firefall' is no longer a hidden gem, reservations now required
source: kron4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon December 12, 2022
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Philadelphia thief has brass.... stole brass railing from outside City Hall
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Andrei, you've lost ANOTHER shopping mall?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
China drops COVID-tracking app. People-tracking apps, security cameras, and secret police stations still okay
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man U announces new training facility in Indiana
source: wpta21.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Fake psychic sentenced in $3M fraud scheme. See, this is why you never want to get hooked on faux noetics
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Indonesian officials announce that Bali's new, ultra-strict sex laws will not apply to tourists, so if you were really hoping for a relaxing week of underage hookers and pre-pubescent boys, game on
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin News KXAN)
 
 
 
University of Texas men's basketball coach Chris Beard arrested on Family Assault charge. University officials not talking yet, but reportedly aren't in a slap-happy mood
source: kxan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hawaii News Now)
 
 
 
Yeah, but he didn't say where he would park it. Bonus: grand theft auto Chevy Malibu
source: hawaiinewsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
War On Christmas gets underway as shotgun-wielding guy threatens to parum pum pum pum middle school drumline at holiday parade
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Man arrested for DUI after taking CHP officer cosplay too far. Ponch and Jon wipe sweat from brow
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun December 11, 2022
(Axios)
 
 
 
Wolves are being reintroduced to Colorado. Zombie Gerald Ford looks on nervously
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Moscow's greatest art museum goes up in flames
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 09, 2022
(UPI)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass Malaysian tapir born at British zoo
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Ocean view estate property just got a little less property and a little more ocean view. Otisburg and Lex Springs looking like good crypto investment opportunities
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Someone dropped a dime on this poor lil' fella
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Los Angeles zoo kills a ginger
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Day 289 of WW3: Russian forces have installed multiple GRAD rocket launchers at Ukraine's Zaporizhzhia nuclear power plant, Ukrainian officials said Thursday. Don't worry, nothing could possibly go wrong. It's your Friday Ukraine war discussion
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WUNC Chapel Hill)
 
 
 
Moore County NC has power restored and search warrants applied for
source: wunc.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(France 24)
 
 
 
France to provide free birth control to everyone under 25. You know, in case Leo DiCaprio decides to visit
source: france24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(We Are Iowa)
 
 
 
Iowa city fails to learn the most basic lesson about holding a Trump rally
source: weareiowa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 08, 2022
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Don't want to harsh your mellow but 420 shut down until next year
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
How to train your unicorn
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WIBW Topeka)
 
 
 
Officers use drone to steer them in the right direction
source: wibw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Pittsburgh airport has 25th and 26th instances of a gun being seized this year. Only 7 more to tie with 2021, folks. Tag for the offenders
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed December 07, 2022
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
In North Carolina, we have domestic terrorists. in Florida, we have iguanas
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
DOJ on Whitey Bulger: Mistakes were made
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 06, 2022
(CNN)
 
Hero
 
Hawaii will give up Daniel K. Inouye highway when Mauna Loa pries it from their cold dead hand, kind of like what Daniel K. Inouye did when he killed those Germans
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
♫ Vanuatu / Couldn't get online when they wanted to / Vanuatu / Their internet's been down for a month or two ♫
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Measles takes the CDC's efforts to stop it in Ohio personally
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Arizona tells Kari to go jump in the Lake
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
I'm sorry TSA, I forgot the gun was in my fanny pack, I was too busy packing my leg warmers, Walkman, cassette tapes, Cabbage Patch doll and Aquanet to notice
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Scottsdale Police: emergency school lockdowns last week were actually because of AC/DC
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon December 05, 2022
(Rappahannock News)
 
 
 
Shenandoah National Park officials would appreciate it if you morons would stop running over deer on Skyline Drive
source: rappnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Clearwater PD: Florida man had sex with dog in front of people including children; damaged church property, a mailbox and potted plants. On the plus side Florida has no state income tax
source: fox13news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Florida cop 'jokingly' fires gun he thought was unloaded into the chest of his Florida cop buddy, killing him instantly, and is instead deprived of the laughs he so craved for his wit and guile
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
At least nine die during baptism ceremony in Johannesburg, where they really must take their dunking seriously
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun December 04, 2022
(Florida Politics)
 
 
 
DeSantis suspends citizen-elected prosecutor for being a "woke ideologue," leading to DeSantis officials having to define woke in court. "The belief there are systemic injustices in American society and the need to address them." So, the Deep State?
source: floridapolitics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
Officials question security protocols, Indiana Jones fandom after man brings gun to Sword Game
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
House for sale: 2 bedrooms, 1 1/2 bath, baseboard heat, full basement, one owner
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat December 03, 2022
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Mass Lottery officials worried this economy's diverted rubes from losing money on scratchers & Keno; "I've been calling All or Nothing 'Nothing But Nothing.' It has not truly added anything to the bottom line"
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Group arrested for cleaning up graffiti
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Luis Suarez takes a bite out of FIFA after Uruguay crashes out of World Cup
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Air Force Times)
 
 
 
F-16 pilot blamed for crashing $27-million aircraft during civilian plane interception because he ejected prematurely
source: airforcetimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 02, 2022
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Rural Colorado is losing cows to an influx of streetlights
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Middle-school kids eat some cannabis edibles. Extreme panic ensues. In Los Angeles
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 01, 2022
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Carjacking falls flat after trio fails to notice that the car they are swiping was waiting for a tire change
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
Science experiment ends up allowing students to get out of school early
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
It's starting to look like the police involved in investigating those four dead University of Idaho students got their training from the same place as all those internet detectives who broke the Boston Marathon bombing case wide open
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
That the Swiss have only frozen $8bil of the estimated $150+bil of Russian cash in their banks is just cuckoo. OTOH at least they're not Belgians. Belgians are dicks
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
IMF Chief Strategist makes unbelievable trip to China
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Jewelry salesperson followed onto freeway, stopped and boxed in by two vehicles. Suspects steal jewelry, leave one vehicle behind, disappearing into rush hour traffic. Oceans Italian Job coming to Netflix in January
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
More than 800 North Carolina HS basketball referees might get called for walking
source: highschoolot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed November 30, 2022
(MSN)
 
 
 
That little temper tantrum that the GOP-dominated Board of Elections for Cochise County, AZ is throwing where they are refusing to certify the results of this last election? It could cost the GOP a seat in the US House of Representatives
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue November 29, 2022
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Pilot walks six miles for help after plane crash. And boy, were his arms tired
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
 
 
 
How many snow angels do you have to make to clear a sidewalk, wouldn't it be easier to just use a shovel?
source: triblive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon November 28, 2022
(WDIO Duluth)
 
 
 
Huge section of lake ice breaks free, setting so many fishermen adrift that authorities trigger emergency cell phone alerts to let them all know to panic
source: wdio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Hey NFL refs, Seattle's 12th Man is just a slogan, not a valid strategy
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Chinese police bravely protect BBC reporter against Covid by beating and arresting him
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Houston shuts down schools over boil order. Ted Cruz seen shopping for airline tickets
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun November 27, 2022
(CNN)
 
 
 
Qatari officials hate rainbows for some reason or another
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
This is a test. This is only a radioactive test. Well, the radioactivity is real, but it's still only a test. Please do not be alarmed, unless you're on fire again
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat November 26, 2022
(WCVB Boston)
 
 
 
11foot8 bridge meet 12foot6 tunnel
source: wcvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu November 24, 2022
(MSN)
 
 
 
"They can jump up to five feet high; they're impressive animals"
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
Oregon: Cannabis-burglar boppers are outmatched by police chopper coppers
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
We get it, you scam AND vape
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed November 23, 2022
(CNN)
 
 
 
Look guys, we just bribed FIFA officials to have the tournament here and being gay is illegal and there's no freedom of speech but you guys shouldn't throw stones, okay? Both sides are bad
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Depite the fact that there's an automatic recount, losing Arizona Republican candidate for state office files lawsuit. They've done their own research
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 2 Fort Myers)
 
 
 
Always make sure you've not packed your live cat before checking your luggage at airline counter
source: nbc-2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue November 22, 2022
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The first labor strike took place over 3,000 years ago in Egypt. Workers were striking for better pay, better conditions and not being forced to walk sideways all the time
source: worldhistory.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
Grass Valley hemp processing plant catches on fire; Cheetos and Mtn Dew en route
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon November 21, 2022
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Now that the election is over and we're not fearmongering about violent crime any more, let's deal with society's real problems - like teens attempting to reboot "Jackass"
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 10 Phoenix)
 
 
 
Republican election official in Maricopa County has to go into hiding after violent threats from the Lake campaign
source: fox10phoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Texas customs agents check case of beer, find out why Lone Star tastes like monkey piss
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat November 19, 2022
(CNN)
 
 
 
God is trying to defund the police
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri November 18, 2022
(VT Digger)
 
 
 
Now here's something to crow about
source: vtdigger.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu November 17, 2022
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
DNA analysis reveals that Ro attempted to wade
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
HBCU Talladega College women's volleyball team quits conference tournament after team member receives "racially motivated picture" on cellphone during awards banquet. Way to go again, Alabama
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
L.A. County Sheriff Department members are on the scene of a "run and hit" incident
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed November 16, 2022
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Maybe media holding companies should not own hospitals
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Floridaman offspring aged 12 & 13, organize $350k foam party in local warehouse. Warehouse owner feels lucky there were only three at the party
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
This article may cause the Obvious tag to be blown to another dimension
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(14 News Evansville)
 
Video
 
House blows up in southern Indiana. This is not a repeat of the one from several months ago. This time with video of explosion and redneck interviews
source: 14news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue November 15, 2022
(CNN)
 
 
 
Judge vacates a Trump immigration policy, allowing asylum seekers access to the border again
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Does this taste like urine to you?
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Novax WelcometoAustralianOpenvic
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
"What day is it?", asked Piglet. "It's the day we turn violent," said the residents of Guangzhou. "Oh, bother," said Pooh
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
White supremacist Texas middle school teacher fired. One down, another 30000 to go
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon November 14, 2022
(NBC News)
 
 
 
New York loser considering run for RNC chairman. No, not that one
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Day 264 of WW3: Can't the Orcs even set a trap competently? Zelensky visits Kherson. Kherson now frontline city after Russian forces withdraw. Ukrainian officials restoring key services. It's your Monday Ukraine war discussion
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun November 13, 2022
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
🎵 They fight, they bite 🎵 They bite and fight and bite 🎵 Bite, bite, bite - fight, fight, fight 🎶 The Trumpy and Turtle Show 🎶
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(The Hill)
 
 
 
Just in case anyone was still unaware that all countries try to influence each others' foreign policies to their own benefit, here's a story about the UAE doing so to the US
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat November 12, 2022
(CTV News)
 
 
 
What's the sound a bison makes when it charges into a dumb tourist? BANFF
source: calgary.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Terminal man dies at Paris airport
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Infamous Red Light District in Amsterdam to be replaced by a multi-story 'erotic centre' complete with 100 of rooms for sex and booze for greater 'class and distinction.' Bonus: Health center for sex toy removal (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFSB Connecticut)
 
 
 
Three college students hospitalized with massive headaches after night at local bar, but they didn't imbibe any alcohol. What they experienced is just considered Ent-ropy
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri November 11, 2022
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Arizona says they'll finally get around to counting all those votes next week
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Illinois Nazis. I still hate Illinois Nazis
source: chicago.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Officer fired after 2 deadly shootings can't find work, loses dog, truck, family. Just kidding, hired as officer 40 miles away
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
NFL: Yeah, the refs TOTALLY blew those calls in the Bears- Dolphins game. We're really not going to do anything about it, but we thought you would like to know. Sorry ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
source: ftw.usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu November 10, 2022
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Eight takeaways from the 2022 midterms, starting with the fact that "the electorate is more progressive than elected officials and corporate media pundits care to admit"
source: jacobin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KWTX Waco)
 
 
 
Texas towns that voted to decriminalize marijuana may be challenged in court. "We have to figure out what the next steps are because we've never had anything on our ballot that directly contradicts state law"
source: kwtx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed November 09, 2022
(Defense News)
 
 
 
Space Force snubs the "War College"/"Defense University" folks, decides the advanced degrees its officers earn while serving will come from a top-10 university. Chair Force gets to be jealous for once
source: defensenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
It's raining fire in Hawai'i. Make that fire ants. It's raining fire ants. The little bastards will rain down and bite you all over. It's truly the end of days
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
Hero
 
Every single Republican the Democrats helped get the nomination, lost. Mission Accomplished
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue November 08, 2022
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Is it a compliment or an insult when Fox News calls Fark's favorite "I Voted" contest winner a 'dystopian rainbow spider' voting sticker? Dystopian, really?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Yacht rot
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Day 258 of WW3: Senior US officials have recently been urging Ukraine to signal it is still open to diplomatic discussions with Russia, sources told CNN. Just in case, you know, that the GQP takes over. VOTE. It's your Tuesday Ukraine war discussion
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MPR News)
 
 
 
Hurricane watch issued for Florida. Is it Tuesday again already?
source: mprnews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun November 06, 2022
(Space.com)
 
 
 
Pentagon continues the cover up. Says most UFOs are "Chinese drones"
source: space.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Footloose .... Oops
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Upcoming US intelligence report 'to be cover-up' as officials fear you are 'too stupid' to know the truth about aliens (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Putin vows to create an army made entirely of people convicted of serious crimes. What a basterd
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
SOMEONE has killed a moose, and as if that wasn't bad enough, SOMEONE has shot an eagle. Information leading to the arrest and conviction of those responsible will result in a reward 50% higher for the eagle, because, you know, moose vs. eagle
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat November 05, 2022
(MassLive)
 
 
 
Here's those "powdered" donuts you wanted - *wink, wink*
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Parents upset by 40-year-old man who wanted to go back to high school
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
If the rats are fleeing, that probably means the ship is sinking
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri November 04, 2022
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
While Muricans practically shrug off treason, Finland just barely tolerates its PM dancing
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Elon: Charging $8 twill shoo away the bots. Bots: Now we can claim to be anyone we want for only $8 like, say, ELECTION OFFICIALS. The day before ELECTION DAY
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Moscow Times)
 
 
 
Good news everybody, you can now visit Russia without a visa for a happy, worry free excursion
source: themoscowtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu November 03, 2022
(MSN)
 
 
 
That Q-believer MAGAT who attacked Paul Pelosi and wanted to break nancy's kneecaps? He didn't even vote in the "stolen" election, because he was an illegal alien....from Canada. I for one say it's aboot time that we built that wall, eh?
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Halloween urban-legend-becomes-reality trifecta in play after someone actually put razor blades in candy
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
US jet whips it out for Putin the pud, draws 'sky penis' over Russian base in the Mediterranean (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Always remember to get rid of the deceased murder victims in your truck bed BEFORE your crash
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
It was walking dead but it's been resurrected, Coral
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed November 02, 2022
(MSN)
 
 
 
ProTip: Don't sleep with an alligator
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Day 252 of WW3: Ukraine's Air Force said it has no effective defense against the types of ballistic missiles that Western officials say Iran is preparing to ship to Russia to use in Ukraine. It's your Wednesday Ukraine war discussion
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Always remember to Google your childhood friends for interstate murder sprees before they make abrupt requests for shelter turned robbery & execution
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter