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headlines found matching 'Wife'
Tue August 11, 2020
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Jerk tells jerk to own it
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WDW News Today)
 
 
 
Now, young Skywalker, you will die
source: wdwnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reddit)
 
 
 
Can't get much cuter than cats attempting to braid each other
source: reddit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon August 10, 2020
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
No, Tom Hanks didn't pull a Polanski and move to Greece. He and his wife were awarded citizenship for their help raising millions after a deadly wildfire
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri August 07, 2020
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
It was a rocket or bomb and not corrupt negligent storage of a known explosive. Yeah, that's the ticket according to my chief aide and wife, Morgan Fairchild
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
President Trump calls her a 'real beauty.' Is he taking about: A) His wife B) His daughter C) Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Rep Scott DesJarlais is the embodiment of Republican hypocrisy: a former doctor who runs as a "pro-family, pro-life" Rep, but had affairs with 6 patients and forced his wife and a mistress to get abortions, wins his primary with 75% of the vote
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
Jason Momoa proves he's worth his weight in gold
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu August 06, 2020
(Politico)
 
 
 
"Days after delivering a presentation on office safety in dealing with Covid-19, Illinois Congressman Rodney Davis, the top Republican on the House Administration Committee, announced he has tested positive for the virus"
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Wife of suspect in Burger King slaying arrested. Wendy, Ronald, Grimace, Colonel Sanders, and Jack already being rounded up for the lineup of usual suspects
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Superspreader infects 91 at Ohio church. GOP Governor sends strongly-worded letter to all churches to please pretty please wear masks, is more afraid of "faith-based leaders" than of COVID. Deep Church
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed August 05, 2020
(Twitter)
 
 
 
And when did you stop beating your wife?
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The State Department IG who was set to replace the State Department IG who was recently sacked has just resigned
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
So remember when it was reported that Detroit Lions quarterback Matthew Stafford had tested positive for Covid-19? Well turns out it was a false positive. And his wife blames the NFL for the hell the family has gone through the past few days
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue August 04, 2020
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Trip to the coast leads to a lifetime of sleeping on the couch (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Core 77)
 
 
 
'Traditional Japanese noodle sluice' is the name of my Empire of the Sun tribute band
source: core77.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Country star shares a pic of her wavy hair, probably
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Jeanine Pirro says she won't take a coronavirus vaccine. Very well; we agree to your terms
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
Weeners
 
Dear Deidre: I recently came across a photo of my wife holding a stripper's manhood. He was at attention and she was smiling. It made me feel sick to my stomach. She knows I have a terrible complex, and he was twice my size. Should I speak up?
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon August 03, 2020
(KOB4)
 
 
 
Brokeback Cowboys for Trump: we'll kill our firstborn to show our loyalty. Ex-wife, judge: not so fast
source: kob.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida State House Rep. Randy Fine (R-ona) admitted to hospital over COVID-19 diagnosis
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NFL)
 
 
 
Drew Brees to use a napkin after eating Thanksgiving leftovers. Or something
source: nfl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Dear Deidre: I have longstanding fetish for my curvy, cheeky sister-in-law, and fondly recall mind-blowing sex I had with her on my wedding night. How can I end this affair? My wife is pregnant with our second kid and doesn't know about our thing
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
"I'm sorry, but it's a fantasy"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"How can we tell our friends to leave their dickhead child at home when we invite them over to hang out?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 31, 2020
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
Bobcat mom has her pawsfull
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Angels outfielder Mike Trout on paternity leave list as his wife is about to spawn a little Trout
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 30, 2020
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Hot flight attendant beats husband when she comes home and finds him "engaged in sexual intercourse" with another woman, cops say
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"I donated sperm once to my sister and her wife, and now my family is pressuring me to do it again. I really don't want to, but they're relentless. What should I do?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 29, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
What's the worst gift you actually gave to your Girlfriend or Boyfriend?
source: us.hola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"I think I spend too much money on custom porn videos. Is there a limit?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Thor's wife escapes flooded car through window. No LifeMjölnir™ required
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 28, 2020
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
Don't tie yourself to your spouse, especially while mountain climbing
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
With a name like Mr. Rape Torture Kill, you'd think they would have kept him on the sex offender list
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lincoln Journal Star)
 
 
 
And the Lord God spoke to Benjamin and said, "Build thee an ark. Well, more like a 'party barge.' You can use your old lawn mower engine. Oh, and put a water cannon on it 'cause that'll be super-sweet." The word of the Lord
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
Weeners
 
(Celebrity) challenges (Other celebrity) to (event) after threatening to (verb) his (body part)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
TNfected
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Tom Hanks is officially Greecy
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 27, 2020
(Core 77)
 
 
 
When Star Wars meets high fashion, come for the 'Louis Vader', stay for the 'Gucci Fett'
source: core77.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Star of Aussie reality show "Farmer Wants a Wife," a hunky bachelor farmer, apparently was not informed that meddling producers and diva-like women are included in the format, wants out
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"During quarantine, my wife of 7 years and I have started getting into horror films. Or, rather, I am pretending to as I hate horror movies but they make my wife incredibly horny, so I take the short-term nonsense for long-term gain, Is that wrong?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat July 25, 2020
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
Against all odds, these two 18-year-old dudes recreated their first school photo together at their high school graduation. Subby thinks it's a good photo, except it's blurry. Must be all the dust in this room
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Russia denies testing anti-satellite weapon, says they were only sending message to beautiful wife, Morgan Fairchild
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Asshats have made "serious threats" against Dr. Fauci, his wife and daughters because they're askeered of science
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 24, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
I have no words
source: biblicalgenderroles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
I have no words
source: biblicalgenderroles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Okay, he's still wildly overpaid as all Div-1 NCAA coaches are, but tleast he not an asshole: North Carolina men's basketball coach donates more than $600,000 to fund scholarships for student athletes ..and he did it anonymously
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Channel)
 
 
 
On this day in history, in 1901, short story writer O. Henry was presented the choice between two doors, one of which would lead from prison
source: history.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Kanye is now mad at Kim because she made him do it
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Kanye is now mad at Kim because she made him do it
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 23, 2020
(Politico)
 
 
 
Let's have a look at Secretary of State Mike Pompeo, his wife and the couple's questionable actions. Oh my
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Writer's wife has an affair, relieved it's with another woman: "I'm not even mad, that's amazing. Both of you, meet me in my bunk"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 22, 2020
(Radio.com)
 
 
 
George Floyd murderer charged with tax fraud and under-reporting income. Bet he wishes he could get his hands on a couple of those counterfeit $20 bills now
source: wccoradio.radio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Apparently, Kayne is still too busy to take his meds
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 21, 2020
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Creepy is finding an abandoned mansion filled with spooky dolls left to rot for 40 years after the owner's death. Priceless is having the movie rights for this soon-to-be horror flick (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
In his first interview since entering rehab after being found drunk in a hotel room with a male prostitute who had OD'ed on meth. Andrew Gillum opens up about his fight with alcoholism and depression. Still would have been a better gov than Desantis
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
You didn't get fired because you're straight...that didn't even make the top ten
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Okay so he's mastered 95% of the current President's duties
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
It's Jon Lovitz and his wife Morgan Fairchild's 39th birthday today. 39th - yeah, that's the ticket
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
"Law and order": after St Louis couple is charged under a law that SPECIFICALLY forbids what they did, the state GOP AG tries to have the case dismissed, the GOP Gov vows to pardon them and the GOP US senator wants Barr to investigate the PROSECUTOR
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
"Kim Tried to Involuntarily Commit Me" is probably not the best political slogan
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 20, 2020
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Brees and Mahomes among the NFL players calling an audible on the NFL season
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"I work two jobs to save money so my wife and I can remodel our house; her parents often ask her for money. Her sister maxed out credit cards in a pyramid scheme; my wife forked over $300,000 we won't see again. Am I right to be angry at her?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun July 19, 2020
(AP News)
 
 
 
The bums chasing his majors record don't have a damn thing on the Golden Bear, just like COVID-19
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Let's see, it's Thou Shalt not Something, um, wear a mask? Um covet thine neighbor's wife's ass? What's that? Kill?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Classics od Science Fiction)
 
 
 
We live in great grampa's science fiction future, so why doesn't the present feel more... futuristic?
source: classicsofsciencefiction.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat July 18, 2020
(CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Ma'am, this is a Verizon store, not a public restroom. And put on a mask, why don't you
source: sacramento.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Law and Crime)
 
 
 
Since when has this administration ever cared about something so plebeian as a "conflict of interest"
source: lawandcrime.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spectator USA)
 
 
 
"It's just a damn cat, I know. The world is burning, and people are dying up and down the country, and I'm upset about a cat. But there it is." This thread lovingly dedicated to all the fur friends lost in recent weeks on both Woofday and Caturday
source: spectator.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(City Pages)
 
 
 
Dudes, where's my car?
source: citypages.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 17, 2020
(Slate)
 
 
 
A first-hand account of navigating the confusing student loan forgiveness program, a quagmire of red tape designed to keep forcing you into indentured servitude
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Famous people aren't like you and me. They can use tacos as currency
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 16, 2020
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Is he still on the fence about who to vote for in November?
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
What it's like to have a 6-figure income and still be struggling with a mountain of student debt. "I just recently had to trade my Mustang in"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Last year my brother died. His wife planned to return to her home country with my nephew, and my parents reacted badly, going so far as to try and kidnap their grandson. She was pregnant at the time too. I'm the only one she contacts. What do I do?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Dr. Fauci's wife Christine Grady has had just about ENOUGH of these attacks on her husband, and, as head of Department of Bioethics at the NIH, if ANYBODY has access to an evil clone army or mutant super-serum, it's her
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 15, 2020
(Sun Journal (Maine))
 
 
 
Two guys named Coombs, Mr. Drew and His Animals Too, and a traveling spider salesman
source: sunjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
I agree with Trump
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 14, 2020
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Quickest way to get Sued by Quicken Loans Executive's Wife is to insinuate Quickies
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Empire star arrested. Not that one, the other one. His wife is choked up over it
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Empire star arrested. Not that one, the other one. His wife is choked up over it
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Well this shouldn't rustle any jimmies at all
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Kelly Conway violates her daughters freedom of speech. Sad
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Couple keeps spark in the relationship
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Couple keeps spark in the relationship
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 13, 2020
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
I want my Mormon stimulus check
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
At least two players, Yankees' Clint Frazier and Astros' Aledmys Diaz, intend to wear masks during games
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun July 12, 2020
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Don't worry, Hootie. There are plenty of blowfish in the pond
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metal Injection)
 
 
 
To complete the rare "Bohemian Rhapsody" trifecta, might I suggest the COVID-19 version, brought to you by Metal Injection?
source: metalinjection.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
COVID-19 has severely diminished the strip club experience
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Just ask his wife, Morgan Fairchild
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Post US)
 
 
 
Irish couple utilize the coronavirus lockdown the best way possible, spend their entire time building an authentic Irish pub in their garden to drink their Guinness in
source: irishpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat July 11, 2020
(Patheos)
 
 
 
One Million Moms (Twitter Pop 4,769) takes issue with Hamilton. And for once it has nothing to do with 'the LGBTQ agenda', but is an equally stupid reason
source: friendlyatheist.patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 10, 2020
(AP News)
 
 
 
After his covid scare, Jimmy Johnson is confused, frustrated, and afraid he may hit new lows
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Buster Posey leaves Giants, looks forward to playing with Twins
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Google bans ads for their competition
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canadian Tories ask police for a criminal investigation of PM Trudeau after it emerges that a charity his government awarded a no-bid $900m contract to had paid hundreds of thousands to his mother, brother, and wife
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
The three greatest things in life: never rat on your friends, always keep your mouth shut and use a pandemic to financially stick it to your estranged wife
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 09, 2020
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Not content with reliving the Plague and Quarantine episodes of Little House on the Prairie, Melissa Gilbert has befriended a bear while waiting out the pandemic. That's not a euphemism about Mr. Edwards
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
A 9,400-square-foot home in Durham, NC is now for sale for only $1.9 million. It includes a chef-style kitchen, lovely outdoor spaces with a swimming pool, faulty staircase that will kill your unwanted spouse
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Has the coronavirus pandemic put your friendships on pause? Or even destroyed some?
source: lioness.substack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Failure to mute may expose ESPN announcer to the natural consequences of his behavior
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 08, 2020
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Earl Cameron, one of the first black actors to forge a successful career in British film and television, has died at age 102
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Silly Muslim-colored Congresswoman. Don't you know the ethically questionable behavior of paying family members hundreds of thousands of dollars to work on your campaign is only for white Christian Congressmen?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Silly Muslim-colored Congresswoman. Don't you know the ethically questionable behavior of paying family members hundreds of thousands of dollars to work on your campaign is only for white Christian Congressmen?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCNC Charlotte)
 
 
 
NASCAR racer Jimmie Johnson cleared to return to racing this weekend a week after testing positive for coronavirus. What could possibly go wrong?
source: wcnc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 07, 2020
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Turns out Stephen Miller's wife Katie Miller really is his soul mate
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: My wife and I haven't had sex in over a year due to her chronic pain, so I've been sneaking upskirt photos of her. Is that wrong?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 06, 2020
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Guess Kanye is in on the grift
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Bungling FBI agents almost blew the operation to arrest Ghislaine Maxwell by telling bad lies to a neighbor who had complained about all the surveillance
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Spy)
 
 
 
Jennifer Grey no longer having the time of her life with Clark Gregg, announces divorce
source: digitalspy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"My husband and his ex-wife divorced after he said he didn't want kids. When he met me, I said I might want a kid; we just welcomed our baby boy. His ex left me a crazy voicemail saying he took her child-bearing years from her. Should I ignore it?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun July 05, 2020
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Nick Cordero, Broadway actor who battled COVID-19, has died at age 41
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat July 04, 2020
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
San Diego is the only major city in Southern California still open for the 4th of July. What could possibly go wrong?
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 03, 2020
(Spectator USA)
 
 
 
Naturally, the Dersh comes to the defense of Madam Maxwell, because ewwwwww
source: spectator.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
50 years ago, Casey Kasem kept his feet on the ground and started reaching for the stars
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Moscow Times)
 
 
 
2020 has clearly decided to play the greatest hits as well as the new stuff
source: themoscowtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 02, 2020
(The Onion)
 
 
 
It's the circle of life
source: local.theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Root)
 
 
 
Patio Patty, come on down ... you're the next contestant on the Angriest Racist White Women of America game show
source: theroot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Bernie Ecclestone, aged 89, just became a father again. In other news, money is a hell of a drug
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"My wife has $100,000 in student loan debt from a Master's Degree program she got kicked out of. We've been married for six months. Every time I suggest she get a job, she says she'd rather die than not do something she loves. What do I do?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 01, 2020
(Politico)
 
 
 
The Hill publisher got his wife a job doing something, no one's exactly sure what, helping Melania in the Office of The First Lady. And no he never wanted anyone to know for some reason
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bristol Post (UK))
 
 
 
"If the spirit of Jane Walford is present can you please make some sort of sound or signal to let us know?"........"F**k off"
source: bristolpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bristol Post (UK))
 
 
 
"If the spirit of Jane Walford is present can you please make some sort of sound or signal to let us know?"........"F**k off"
source: bristolpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
And in today's "What the fark is wrong with you." NASCAR star's son apologizes for saying Bubba Wallace should be drug by a car from a noose
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
The real reason Kim Jong-un ordered the liaison office with South Korea to be blown up? He was furious after 'dirty photos' of his wife were shared on leaflets floating from the south (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Just when you thought the St. Louis lawyer brandishing a gun like a Hollywood extra and threatening innocent Black people couldn't look like more of an ignorant asshole, here's his interview with Chris Cuomo. "TERRORISTS WERE ATTACKING ME"
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Bánh mì? How bout I bánh YOU?
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 30, 2020
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
You don't know how it feels to be me, but you could know how it feels to listen to a newly-released acoustic version of this song that Tom Petty recorded at home back in '93
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Indy100)
 
 
 
Kanye celebrates wife becoming billionaire by posting pics of tomatoes
source: indy100.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Dr. Dre's wife detoxes herself, files for divorce after 24 years citing chronic disinterest
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 29, 2020
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Former French Prime Minister and his wife are convicted and sentenced to prison over a "fake jobs" scandal that also cost him the country's presidency...that was kicked off by an article in the French equivalent of "The Onion"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Hulking Rocky actor Dolph Lundgren, 62, cruelly mocked by very jealous old fat men over his engagement to 24-year-old fiancée (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Spy)
 
 
 
Rick & Morty will finally solve the mystery of Rick's wife and Beth's mother
source: digitalspy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 28, 2020
(CBC)
 
 
 
Trying to explain to the wife how you got COVID19 got a bit more awkward for those living in Vancouver
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 26, 2020
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Tom Brady on practicing during coronavirus pandemic: "Only thing we have to fear, is fear itself," using the words of the president permanently disabled by a highly contagious disease
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 25, 2020
(WKBW Buffalo)
 
 
 
Judging by this judge's behavior, he shouldn't be judging others' behavior. Judge behavior
source: wkbw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
The Party of Lincoln? "We can debate about what side was right or wrong, or, you know, whether it was an invasion or a rebellion"
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 24, 2020
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Pilot programme allows Chinese residents to check if their partner has a history of domestic abuse before getting married. However, you must provide your ID as well as the ID of your future spouse. Because that conversation should go smoothly
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: I accidentally shared erotic fan fiction during a Zoom meeting. What should I do? Will I somehow have sparked the next Twilight franchise?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Here's the June 2020 edition of: "These 30 somethings retired early with $1M+ in the bank thanks to these financial strategies that are utterly non-viable for the majority of folks reading this"
source: grow.acorns.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 23, 2020
(Cincinnati Bell)
 
 
 
Son, I am disappoint doesn't even begin to cover it
source: cincinnatibell.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Was that wrong? Should I not have done that?
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
Nosferatu would like you to know that BLM is going to steal your wife and children and confiscate your house
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
I woke up this morning pensive, with a strange urgency that compelled me to submit not three, but five headlines to Fark. And four were greenlit. Surely this will be a happy day. Nice pegging from the wife, too. Until tmrw, XO. Hey, this does work
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Pence tries to take another bullet for his beloved President, pretends to fall on Air Force 2 stairs to distract from Trump's embarrassing old man ramp shuffle people keep talking about. Nice try Mike, but too obvious
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Pence and his mother-wife used old address to vote in Indiana GOP primary...by mail
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
For a organically distanced and non-contact sport, that tennis match put together by Novak Djokovic in Serbia and Croatia is coughing up a lot of infections
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 22, 2020
(LGBTQ Nation)
 
 
 
90-year-old comes out because he can't forget the man he fell in love with 70 years ago. And close the damn window, something just got into subby's eye
source: lgbtqnation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Justin Bieber says sexual assault allegations against him are "factually impossible," though the mustache isn't helping
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 21, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
NRA loving Jesus worshiping uber-Christian Republican mayor of Virginia Beach outed for having an affair with twenty-year-old assistant. Bonus: On Twitter, by his wife
source: bluevirginia.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Look, Rudy, you're really not helping here
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Liverpool Echo)
 
 
 
Let's start with these so-called top 10 cheesiest dad jokes EVER for Father's Day and have you add some to see how lame you can get
source: liverpoolecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Radio.com)
 
 
 
Past Pat Pat Pass pissed players played pensioners
source: weei.radio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 20, 2020
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Interviewer to Trump rally goer: What would make you lose support for President Trump? Rally goer: Committing adultery on his beautiful, classy wife. Interviewer: He committed adultery with Stormy Daniels. Rally goer: Pobody's nerfect
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 19, 2020
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Lisa Rinna wears nothing but sunglasses in naked photoshoot and I could have stopped after the word nothing, right? Certainly after naked. So any plans for Father's Day weekend? [NSFW]
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 18, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
There may be a few bugs to work out with the A.I. Entertainment Reporter program
source: nationeditions.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 17, 2020
(CBS 12 West Palm Beach)
 
 
 
Man goes to get another item while his wife waits in long line at Walmart. Too bad it was after closing time
source: cbs12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Six degrees of scary Kevin Bacon
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wave3 Louisville)
 
 
 
39 year old wife of Congressman Andy Barr (R-KY) passes away, leaving behind two children. Subby is fresh out of snark
source: wave3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 16, 2020
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Rep Illhan Omar has announced her father has died from the Coronavirus. No joke, no snark, just a reminder that the virus is STILL out there, still killing people, and that you farkers need to stay safe, wear a mask and keep washing your hands
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Sure we can get a dog but is this actually a dry run for a baby?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Bio-terrorist tries to take out Congress
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Dear Deidre: Due to the coronavirus we can only have ten people to Mum's funeral. My eldest sister wants to invite Mum's five siblings, and the other insists on bringing her husband. Are my three kids SOL? Dear LW: Yep; point them to the livestream
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Profits for liquor stores dries up as people realize that they can get just as drunk on four buck chuck as an $80 bottle of wine
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: My husband doesn't want anyone to know I have a higher IQ than him; apparently, he's not only dumb, but his ego is too fragile. Do I have to hide this fact or is he being a complete misogynist jackwagon?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The US Sun)
 
 
 
Unless your man has a very SPECIFIC job, if he starts shaving his pubes because he's finally going back to work after the shutdown... He may be cheating
source: the-sun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Core 77)
 
 
 
Article about Punisher creator Gerry Conway's BLM fundraiser and attempt at reclaiming the skull symbol with his "Skulls for justice" project - with link
source: core77.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 13, 2020
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Winners now free to do drugs
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"They have destroyed our furniture, given us innumerable scratches and scars, and gone through enough cat litter to occupy several landfills. And it's been wonderful". Welcome to Caturday
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 12, 2020
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Dear Abby: Nobody is wearing masks or social distancing, including me. Why are people angry at me for pointing this out?
source: chicago.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
The final song recorded by John Prine, entitled "I Remember Everything," has been released. You can listen to it now to the left and get emotional to the right
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Are you a straight man who's excited about opening up your relationship with your wife or girlfriend? Here's one important thing to remember. Hint: sausages
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Man loses Mr. Pickle's franchise after comparing BLM to the KKK
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 11, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Behold the shiatty power of social media
source: mymcmedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Anson Williams files for divorce for the second time this year, demanding a second Fark headline saying his Happy Days are over, this time I mean it
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 10, 2020
(KOMU Columbia)
 
 
 
Republican first elected in 2016, best known for inept governance and cheating on his wife, plans to run again in 2024. Difficulty: not Trump
source: komu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVB Boise)
 
 
 
Human remains found on the property of Lori Vallow's husband. Remember her? Her previous two husbands died, as did her brother, and her new husband's wife. Oh, and her kids have been missing since September
source: ktvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 09, 2020
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida Woman accused of dressing as a clown to get new trial date. Well, she also shot someone, but yeah, that clown thing
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Britain's Prince Philip turns 99 on Wednesday. Asked to what he attributes his long life, the Prince replied, "centuries of royal inbreeding"
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
We got it, Ted. Nobody wants to see you naked
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
After the gas station incident, Karen Arizona is having an intervention because her husband says she's not normally a raving, unhinged, racist
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
After the gas station incident, Karen Arizona is having an intervention because her husband says she's not normally a raving, unhinged, racist
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 08, 2020
(ESPN)
 
 
 
LA Galaxy cuts player after his wife posts that BLM protestors are "cattle" who should be shot. They're Serbian so I guess that makes her a Karenina
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Retired Navy captain apologizes after his anti-black rant to his wife went public thanks to him not realizing he was broadcasting on Facebook live
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The US Sun)
 
 
 
Drew Brees's wife admits she's a problem
source: the-sun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Omaha area County Attorney under investigation after his estranged wife's boyfriend loses his job and gets committed to a mental institution
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 07, 2020
(Fox News)
 
 
 
RINO population begins to rebound after near extinction in 2016
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 06, 2020
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Legendary music producer Rupert Hine dies at 72, leaving behind a bunch of 80's songs that will get stuck in your head once you find out he produced them
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 05, 2020
(The New York Observer)
 
 
 
Willem Dafoe, actor, on making out with his close friend's wife for the movie Tommaso: "You know the rules. You're trying to help each other, you're playing make believe, it's like that. It's an intimacy that has to do with trying to make something"
source: observer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Who throws a soap dish, honestly? Marcell Ozuna's wife
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Variety)
 
 
 
Sweet bassist Steve Priest has attended his last ballroom blitz
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"My friends say my boyfriend is a misogynist because he's like John Germaine in the episode of Seinfeld 'The Rye.' Is that a reason for misogyny?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 04, 2020
(Reuters)
 
 
 
"Florida offers drive-through Botox to quarantined residents." Trying to improve this headline would be like putting lipstick on a pig
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
The most idiotic celebrity marriage in history is about to end
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
The most idiotic celebrity marriage in history is about to end
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
And Winde Cries Melania - Trump's Silicon Sally Trophy Wife Leads Fema on Hurricane Preparedness Briefing
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The SEC loses another old school coach. Johnny Majors runs through his final tunnel into the light
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
Jurassic Plant
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
Jurassic Plant
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 03, 2020
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Sean Hannity and Jill Rhodes divorce after she suddenly realizes she's married to Sean Hannity
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
More and more Americans are skipping things like mortgage and car payments in order to afford necessities, like Disney+ subscriptions, cell phone plans, and that new gaming monitor
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
On the other hand, 24 hour meat vending machines
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
" I've been on antidepressants for nearly 25 years now, and after multiple attempts to wean myself off I realize I'll be on them forever. The problem is, they've killed my sex drive. How can I get my groove back?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 02, 2020
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
WaPo "fact checker" gives the Lincoln Project's attack ad on "Rich Mitch" 3 Pinocchios because it falsely says he got rich through making back room deals as a Senator instead of through marrying into wealth and then funneling contracts to his wife
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Derek Chauvin's wife files to change her last name, probably to Baskin
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"I wanted a grandchild for years. My son and his wife had one in April; we couldn't visit the hospital due to Covid. They won't let us visit because my husband golfs, I got haircut and we visit friends. How can I make them see they're being selfish?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 01, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Mother Daughter look-alikes - pick one
source: us.hola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Armenian prime minister tests positive for Covid-19, putting the future of Armani suits in jeopardy
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Is there a food or drink you love that nobody else around you does?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 31, 2020
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
UK man dies after being attacked by cows, casting further doubt on herd immunity
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 30, 2020
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Phil Robertson you are the drake
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 29, 2020
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Indonesia's Minister for Politics: "Initially, you try to control it, then you realise you can't. Then you learn to live with it" a) Covid-19 b) your wife c) Both
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Because the internet is a savage place and privacy no longer exists in the digital age, we now know that Derek Chauvin's wife once wrote a bad check
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Therapy via Zoom helps raise up a young boy with Down Syndrome
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
George Conway must really enjoy that couch, throwing shade at his succubus wife and her boss in one fell swoop
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 28, 2020
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Zodiac Killer attempts to explain journalism to reporter. Since you're reading this on Fark, you know it doesn't end well
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
In December email to his AD, Arizona State hoops coach Bobby Hurley complained that nothing was being done to Sexual Harassment Booster who creeped on his wife and other women associated with ASU athletics
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click2Houston)
 
 
 
"Go back to your own country" shouts hammer waving woman wearing Irish flag t-shirt
source: click2houston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
This awesome dad is a shoo-in for Father of the Year
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 27, 2020
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Florida Man, in the foyer, with the handgun
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Teacher gives students valuable lesson in commitment (to casual racism and masturbation jokes)
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"I've been sexting my wife's aunt lately. Is that wrong? Should I not do that?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Worst. Secretary of State. EVAR
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Dear Abbie, my wife asks me to screw her brains out while she's hammered and calls me a p*ssy when I refuse. What do
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 26, 2020
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
This weekend ESPN will host All-Star Wife-Bullying Peloton Ride with over a dozen all-star pro athletes and overbearing husband/coaches
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
So long Admiral Paris, good bye George Costanza's boss Mr. Wilhelm, vaya con dios T.J. Hooker's boss. Actor Richard Herd has passed away at 87
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Loudwire)
 
 
 
Christian rock singer: "I am now finding that I no longer believe in God. It didn't happen overnight or all of a sudden. It's been more like pulling on the threads of a sweater, and one day discovering that there was no more sweater left"
source: loudwire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Andrea Bocelli never saw Covid-19 coming for him, but he kicked its ass anyway
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
With full-time parenting "isn't human" comment Justin Timberlake has managed to make himself even more punchable. How's your human, or pup, or cat, or hedgie, or furry, or birdie, or marsupial, or reptile, or??? parenting going?
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
UK's Stephen Miller: That time during lockdown I drove to a castle with my family, I was just..um..testing my vision was good enough to drive. UK Police: Oh, FFS
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 25, 2020
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Kentucky Flu-Klux-Klan protesters hung an effigy of Governor Beshear outside his home. While he was present. Along with his wife and children
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Kevin Hart's family finally understands why audiences are tired of him
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 24, 2020
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
But the strep came back, the very next day, yes the strep came back, it just wouldn't stay away
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland 19)
 
 
 
High school seniors thought they had everything taken away from them in their last year of high school, then suddenly HOAs
source: cleveland19.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Dear Annie: My wife likes to walk around the house naked. It was fine when she was younger but her body hasn't aged very well. Should I say something to her?
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 23, 2020
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Man spends 32 seconds videotaping the breach of the Edenville Dam in Mid-Michigan. The reason the video isn't longer is because he was too busy trying to find out if anyone was calling 911
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Cats have performed some amazing tasks in ubiquitous online videos. But one feline video opus will help save struggling movie theaters during the Covid-19 pandemic. Welcome to Caturday
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 22, 2020
(Politico)
 
 
 
Biden: 'If you have a problem figuring out whether you're for me or Trump, then you ain't black'. Is it really that hard to just shut up until the election?
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
N.J. woman accused of fatally beating wife with wine chiller captured in Texas. Wine chiller currently under interrogation Lone Star style
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
"Have YOU donated 110,000 masks to rural Texas hospitals? Be a lot cooler if you did"
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The American Independent)
 
 
 
GOP Senate candidate: 'Let's simply take national media and shut it down
source: americanindependent.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 21, 2020
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Husband and wife sentenced to death over high car prices. Probably why you don't want to sell cars in Iran
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Subby doesn't know what a "Cocomelon" is, but your kids do, and it's heading to Netflix
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Roses are red / Violets are blue / I wrote my wife a poem every day for twenty-five years/ Burma Shave
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 20, 2020
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Most people put on life jackets when their boat is sinking 12 miles offshore. Then there are these two guys
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Mary Kate Olsen may have moved on from the show that made her famous, but her marriage ended over the lack of a full house
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 19, 2020
(CREW)
 
 
 
The slow motion Saturday Night Massacre rolls on, this time with an IG investigating Mitch's wife
source: citizensforethics.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
John Glenn's wife: Killed by Covid-19 at 100 years old
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Pennsylvania school director believes we should stand our ground against those who refuse to wear a mask
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 18, 2020
(CNN)
 
 
 
The ocean stole Shad Gaspard of Cryme Tyme
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Pastor who exposed 180 congregants to coronavirus speaks out: "the brainwashing won't stick if we can't get you into a room"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Dallas/Ft. Worth)
 
 
 
Man cannot find anywhere on in-law's 17,000-acre farm that has cellular service from where he can work out of his wife's minivan. Hill area ensues
source: dfw.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The National)
 
 
 
Turns out that being a beloved, best-selling author doesn't mean that you can't do absolutely, insanely stupid things during a pandemic. We're looking at you, Neil Gaiman
source: thenational.scot   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 16, 2020
(News 4 San Antonio)
 
 
 
PSA: When the three year old asks to pet you and your wife's dog, you should just keep walking, unless you really want to be arrested for attempted kidnapping, perp-walked on the evening news, and run out of the town that you were born and raised in
source: news4sanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patheos)
 
 
 
A man who used God as his anti-viral protection learns his lesson
source: patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 15, 2020
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Rich guy says public dock near his luxury home gets in the way of his three boats. Bonus: he knew it was there when he bought the house but assumed he could "fix the problem" with enough money and lawyers
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
Video
 
Finnish Hydraulic Press guy and his wife run out of stuff to crush, decide to shoot a day-long video of all the trains that go by their town, and condense the action to eleven minutes of pure excitement
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(NYPost)
 
 
 
Bob Watson joins his 1970s afro in the great ballpark in the sky
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 14, 2020
(NYPost)
 
 
 
"One day he will go too far, say something unforgivable - too vulgar, sexist or crude - and be fired or forced to resign." Difficulty: Donald Trump or Howard Stern? Why not both?
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Wed May 13, 2020
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Assault with a deadly bouquet
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(The Cut)
 
 
 
Trans woman that had case heard by SCOTUS for being fired from funeral home for being trans finds different path back to workplace
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Tue May 12, 2020
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Mirror, mirror, on the wall, Who's the annoyingest wife of all? Season Finale of The FLASH on The CW at 8 PM EDT, then the Legends form a sorority (really) at 9
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(Guardian)
 
 
 
Images from a Stiller Life
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(Slate)
 
 
 
"My husband and I have 3 kids. I have a Ph.D. in literature and hold a job I love. My kids assume my husband is smarter because he's the math and science guy; he doesn't have a doctorate, though. How can I get my kids to see I'm intelligent too?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 11, 2020
(The Hill)
 
 
 
U.S. diplomat's wife who killed a motorcyclist while driving on the wrong side of the road: "I have diplomatic immunity." Interpol: "It's been revoked"
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(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Real estate CEO made $1.6 million in the stock market in 8 days then gave the money to his employees. Spiffy tag short-sells Unlikely tag
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(AP News)
 
 
 
Man who wanted to fight his wife with sword demands she get a psychological evaluation
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(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Man has affair with Lady Covid19. Stay your Selva alone
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(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Police called to domestic violence case where a woman hit her boyfriend with a frying pan and slashed his tires with a butcher knife. No info about the whereabouts or status of the sandwich
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(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
"This is Houston, and there are crazy drivers, and I never would have expected to see them going through a cemetery. Especially when everyone was there to pay their respects during a patriotic flyover"
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(Times Union)
 
 
 
"Family game night is here to stay" - Quarantine has brought families closer together, do we have to make a game of it?
source: blog.timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 10, 2020
(Slate)
 
 
 
"My two sons, 8 and 10, are good, healthy eaters; they are food adventurous, enjoy veggies, eating everything we do. My in-laws live next door and give my kids kid food like nuggets instead of salmon when my boys want salmon. I'm outraged. What do?"
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(Fark)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: This is not my beautiful house. This is not my beautiful wife
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Sat May 09, 2020
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
The team behind the Doctor Sleep adaptation now tackling Stephen King's Revival
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 08, 2020
(KUSI San Diego)
 
 
 
Is it me or do all the racist assholes go grocery shopping in the same California town?
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(AP News)
 
 
 
Hockey guy apologizes for saying bad things on friend's Instagram which was "hacked" which as we all know, is the online form of blaming the media
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(Politico)
 
 
 
Wife-like typing detected?
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Thu May 07, 2020
(MSN)
 
 
 
"I guess I won't do this again." As last words go, that's not bad. Tag for the deceased
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(TMZ)
 
 
 
Who would have thought there's be so much overlap between people missing the point of Tiger King and people ignoring social distancing? Everyone? Oh, carry on then
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(The Sun)
 
 
 
Honey Boo Boo's Mama June begs fans to pay cash to chat with her (possible nsfw content on page)
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(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Congolese soccer player Hiannick Kemba ready to return to the pitch after 48 months out due to his death in a car crash
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bleacher Report)
 
 
 
News: Earl Thomas held at gunpoint. Fark: by his wife. TotalFark: because he was cheating. UltraFark: with his brother
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(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Stoya: I have been with my husband for 25 years. I love my husband unconditionally, and I know that he loves me unconditionally. The problem is we have never ever had sex. He takes Viagra to feel like a man but doesn't use it. What can I do?"
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(CNN)
 
 
 
20,000 teens just received driver licenses without a road test. Good thing there's no one on the roa... oh hi Georgia
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Wed May 06, 2020
(CNN)
 
 
 
Minor league pitcher finds out his family was killed over Facebook. Wow people take that site too seriously
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(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Ryan Reynolds has lost all sense of temporality, wonders if we're in year five of quarantine
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
If you think people are pretty horrible lately, here's some photos that will warm the cockles of your shriveled little hearts
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(Some Guy)
 
 
 
May 6th is my 20th wedding anniversary. I've been with my wife for nearly 23 years. Our divorce paperwork should come through in the next week or two. Wat do?
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Tue May 05, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Marginally proficient cook baking a cake for my wife for Mothers Day. Looking for suggested recipes, LGT one example
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(Twitter)
 
 
 
Donald Trump would like female journalists to behave more like fictional stereotypical sitcom housewifes from the 1950s and stop being so uppity. He really is Biff Tannen
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Mon May 04, 2020
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Seems like Dog the Bounty Hunter is a real Dog the Booty Hunter as he's now engaged for the second time since his wife's death eight months ago
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(Popular Science)
 
 
 
With your eyes covered and nose plugged, you probably can't distinguish an apple from an onion, or your wife from that one girl from that TV show
source: popsci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 02, 2020
(NPR)
 
 
 
For just 150 pesos, you can safely shop for groceries in the style of a legendary luchador
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(Messy Nessy Chic)
 
 
 
If you have an extra hundred and twenty five million dollars laying around, William Randolph Hearst's love nest is for sale. Severed horse head not included
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(The Wrap)
 
 
 
"Thanks for everything, Ted. Sincerely"
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Fri May 01, 2020
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Hey ladies, you wanna get with an older dude who has nipple piercings?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Stoya: I am a woman who's begun dating a man who it turns out is a virgin. He went to Catholic school his entire life. He's been reading how to have sex and still hasn't figured out how a woman gets pregnant. What are my options here?"
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Thu April 30, 2020
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Q - You know how you can tell a Florida man has broken into your home? A - He's still there, curled up on your couch, snacking your foods
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(Radio.com)
 
 
 
Hall of Famer Andre Dawson has dealt with the coronavirus pandemic from a different perspective -- as a mortician
source: 670thescore.radio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
I'd ask you to come work in the fields where I grow my farks, but alas, my field is barren
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(Channel 3000 Madison)
 
 
 
In a rare Entertainment/Geek crossover, a geology teacher tweeted Dwayne Johnson and asked him what his favorite rock was. The Rock replied
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(KHQA Quincy)
 
 
 
Not news: Governor of Illinois issues "stay-at-home" order. News: Is questioned about someone notable violating it. Fark: It's his wife, gone to Florida. Double Fark: Tells reporters to mind their business
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(CNN)
 
 
 
72-year-old UK man has completed a solo trans-Atlantic rowing trip in 96 days. Asks if he's missed anything
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(NFL)
 
 
 
"With the No. 1 pick in the 2020 NFL Draft, the Cincinnati Bengals release Andy Dalton"
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(Time)
 
 
 
You know who else killed himself 75 years ago today?
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(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A single farm in Louisville supplies the Kentucky Derby with all the mint for their juleps. They are now going to have to mow off 2 tons of it
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(Politico)
 
 
 
Trump's top domestic policy adviser Joe Grogan resigns, presumably to focus more on podcast, comedy routine, pitching 'Fear Factory' remake
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"My husband won't pick up his toenail clippings off the floor, so I do it and instead of throwing them away I put them in his coffee. Is that wrong?"
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Wed April 29, 2020
(New Statesman)
 
 
 
One thing the pandemic has made absolutely clear: Those who are in charge of our country have absolutely no idea how much it costs to live in it
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(Page Six)
 
 
 
Mario Lopez would like everyone to know that he's getting laid more than you during quarantine
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Tue April 28, 2020
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Man gives himself a tattoo for every day he's in lockdown. Problem is, he's running out of skin
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(TMZ)
 
 
 
Motocross icon Marty Smith & wife killed in dune buggy wreck at same spot where Boba Fett & Jabba died. Damn Jedis
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(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Illinois rule means family can only legally be in their boat when it's in their garage. No word on status of motorboating, man in canoe
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(Slate)
 
 
 
"My boyfriend has spent the majority of the pandemic lockdown reconnecting with his ex-wife. Is this a bad sign for our relationship?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Meet the 'Modern Milkman, who will deliver milk to your house and his business is booming during the pandemic
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Mon April 27, 2020
(The Hill)
 
 
 
National Treasure Cecily Strong roasts Trump as Gretchen Whitmer: 'That woman' is 'what Trump calls his wife'
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(NYPost)
 
 
 
NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio is giving ANOTHER nepotistic job to his wife? That's it. I'm never voting for him to be mayor again. Narrator: He's term limited
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(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Even Howard Stern says he's all in for Ba-Ba-Biden
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Kim Jong-un's disappearance explained - he was standing behind his invisible kids (possible nsfw content on page)
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(ABC News)
 
 
 
You made the old man cry. There, are you punks happy now? Now get of his damn lawn
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun April 26, 2020
(AP News)
 
 
 
There he goes aaaaand he's safe. Vin Scully is safe at home
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat April 25, 2020
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Fast & Furious 33 UK Split: I say, what's all this then, are you popping it out now, love?
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(TMZ)
 
 
 
The Price Is Right's announcer George Gray has won the Showcase Showdown and will be taking home...three massive heart attacks
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Weasels, angry they can't make money off of a family that wishes no part of their shenanigans, call the subjects self absorbed for refusing to dance for them
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(The Hill)
 
 
 
Wisconsin is going to have a very bad May
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Fri April 24, 2020
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Chris Cuomo's wife shares health and wellness tips, demonstrates why Fark needs a "woo" tab
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(Independent)
 
 
 
Because being constantly stuck inside with the wife and kids is enough to drain even the most zzzzzzzz
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Occupy Democrats)
 
 
 
"The former White House advisor turned MAGA celebrity and podcast meme created a stir on social media this afternoon when he declared that "the Left" hates Trump because they hate masculinity and that "manly men" don't hate Trump." Oh sure
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