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| Wed July 15, 2020 |
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Jeff Sessions political career goes out the way it came in, through a blaze of racism
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The people who stood by: The GOP senators who are enabling historic corruption in the Trump White House
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The snake is eating itself
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Far, far too late, the media seems to finally be learning. CNN, MSNBC cut away from Trump's "Rose Garden Ramble" as soon as it became clear he was trying to deliver a campaign speech instead of announce a new program
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Trump to spout more nonsense from his unmasked face hole, allegedly about infrastructure. Keep a keen ear for violations of the Hatch Act
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Yes, yes, and YES
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He leaped from topic to topic, sometimes in a single run-on sentence, and often failed to complete a thought
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Nobody wants to head the Congressional committee to oversee how the Adminstration misspent $500 billion for coronavirus relief. General consensus is "leave this mess for Joe"
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Nobody wants to go to this year's Republican convention. Coronavirus inconsolable
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| Tue July 07, 2020 |
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Lamar Alexander is skipping the convention to allow space for those who have never attended a convention, and for no other reason
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Trump's Coronavirus vaccine czar has a past shadier than Trump's own
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Wargaming the end of American democracy. Tag is for the fact that this scenario is even plausible
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Democrats hope that the once-every 20 years occurrence of the census coming in a presidential election year, combined with once-in-a-lifetime occurrence of an incumbent president being this weak, might let them undo a decade of GOP gerrymandering
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Because we have a president who is clueless, America is now WHO-less
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In what is SURELY pure coincidence, Dallas megachurch that hosted Mike Pence approved for millions in pandemic aid
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Chuck Grassley says Congress may override Trump veto on removing Confederate names from military bases
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Lindsey Graham, facing tough reelection, attempts to save his ass by breaking with the president on key issues
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Wall Street abandons Trump
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The only logical conclusion is that liberal voters are afraid of women in power
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Former New Hampshire governor John Sununu attempts to frighten voters, says that if Biden wins, the once great capitalist nation will be transformed under 'socialists' like Warren, AOC
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| Wed July 01, 2020 |
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♫ Hello foreclosure crisis my old friend ♪ I've come to talk with you again ♬
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GOP Senators mull replacing Columbus Day with Juneteenth as a federal holiday. Wait, what?
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Remember when the GOP used the term "flip flopper" as a derogatory slur to sink John Kerry's presidential bid? Good times, good times
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Facebook pens open letter denying they profit from hate, oh they totally just learned boogaloo was a hate thing and that's why they used to profit from boogaloo grouos
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So to clarify in Pennsylvania the cops have to see you light the firework and then have to see the firework go off before they can issue a citation. And then they are not allowed to seize any unused fireworks in your possession
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I was watching the news today and they said there's some kind of virus infecting people in the United States
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Kellyanne Conway says Americans should wear masks and prioritize opening of schools over bars, also global warming is real and the rich should pay more taxes. Ok, ok, not the last two, but still, if that's not progress, I am not sure what is
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A visibly terrified Tucker Carlson says Republicans are failing voters by offering "partisan junk food" like the Strzok texts and Benghazi
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As losing to Biden and the Democrats becomes increasingly inevitable, the rest of the GOP goes against Trump on masks
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Trump bails out on Alabama rally after realizing maybe people just might not want to catch the covid
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...pation
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Yertle warns Democrats not to mess with the filibuster rule if they win control of the chamber in November, as he would never do such a thing
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| Wed June 17, 2020 |
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Discuss the issues facing Brooklyn's 50th District or talk about how the challenger wrote in her old online journal that she mooned a couple having sex when she was 19. Since you're reading this here .. well, you know
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The Senate GOP unveils a police reform bill, because when it's time to tackle the issues of institutional corruption and systemic racism, the first people the nation always turns to for a solution is a bunch of old white guys
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Two options that Biden has to ensure electoral victory in the 2020 presidential election are to 1) Rebuild the Blue Wall or B) Chase the Sun Belt. [whynotboth.jpeg]
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Like his hats, Trump likes his elections made in China
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Its time to talk about defunding Congress
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Scientists: Yeah, it's probably a good idea to continue staying at home for awhile and got out sparingly; you might get sick. Trump: Here's four grand in tax credits for every American to do exactly the opposite of that
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It seems Mitch McConnell has really gone off the deep end, he's now speeding up the police bill, challenging Democrats to get it passed before election day
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Trump: INFRASTRUCTURE NOW. Grassley: LOLNO
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What the hey hey, nanny nanny? Cocaine Mitch McConnell says he's okay with removing Confederate names from U.S. military bases
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Investigation into Sen. Loeffler's (R-eally Crooked) insider trading ends with a dismissal of charge... mostly because it was decided by a jury of her peers
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It takes two to tango and Senator Kennedy wants those filthy Yankees to lose their monuments too
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They Live alien Tucker Carlson tells viewers they aren't crazy for watching his show
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Who knew Biden was a grower?
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DC statehood? Marvel at the possibility. It's a dark horse, but a valiant attempt by the House. Once it reaches the Senate, it will go BOOM
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| Tue June 16, 2020 |
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Obama to hold joint fundraiser for Biden next week. Man, if someone does a funyuns fundraiser at the same time, they'll clean up
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Rep Illhan Omar has announced her father has died from the Coronavirus. No joke, no snark, just a reminder that the virus is STILL out there, still killing people, and that you farkers need to stay safe, wear a mask and keep washing your hands
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The University of South Carolina has a women's dormitory named for a gynecologist who performed experimental surgeries on slaves without anesthesia
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Good news, everybody. Trump says that if he allows the election to proceed in November, and if GOP suppression efforts fail to limit minority votes, and if his efforts to rig other votes in his favor fail, he'll leave office peacefully
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Some of those small business PPP loans went to members of Congress, and it's unknown how they spent the money
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While the "We HAVE to vote for the Anti-Christ because he'll put 'Godly Men' on the Supreme Court" crowd is FURIOUS today; by and large Republicans in Congress are pretty cool with today's landmark ruling. Except Ted Cruz who's playing "that asshole"
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| Wed June 03, 2020 |
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And if there's anyone who knows about suborning institutions to advance fascist ends, it's a neocon
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Now that the King has been dethroned, Iowa democrats' next challenge will be to De-Feenstra-te the state as well
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Chuck Schumer tells Republicans to stop being afraid about what Trump might tweet about them if they took a stand
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In Dec of 1944 with France firmly in Allied hands, the Germans launched a final, desperate, counter-offensive that, while it had some initial successes, ended up sealing their fate as it depleted their resources. Why do I bring this up? Oh no reason
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Turns out the vast majority of Americans support the protesters. Please proceed with your crackdown, Mr. President, there's no way it could backfire on you
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Hey Steve, can you check the shocks while you're down there?
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Minnesota authorities: When our Director of Public Safety said we were using "contact tracing" on arrested protesters, he was...err.."being metaphorical" and CERTAINLY not implying we are abusing new surveillance tech developed for Covid-19, no sir
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Man, you order the tear-gassing of dozens of innocents and stand by racist cops and suddenly your numbers plummet. WHO COULD HAVE SEEN THAT COMING?
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| Fri May 29, 2020 |
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That Stapler was a boomerang
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Eric Swalwell has no time for excuses, says release the Flynn tapes or "buzz off"
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Sens Warren, Klobuchar, Bennet, Schumer, Whitehouse and Booker publicly respond to Trump's tweet. They use fancier words but essentially all same the same thing: "Jesus FARK Donnie,WTF is WRONG with you?"
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Today's challenge: Replace the last three words in TFA's actual headline with three other words that are also true
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Black Republican Senate candidate believes Trump's comment about "shiathole countries" was racist, but still supports him 2000%. "We've had our minds twisted to believe that speaking out is tantamount to fixing things"
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Biden says Trump's legacy will be that of a failed president, responsible for mass death and economic ruin
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At this point, the GOP wants to subpoena virtually everyone in the Obama administration
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Pennsylvania representative goes on farking tirade after Republican legislator tests positive, hides diagnosis, and keeps working (NSFW language in video)
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Flashback, October 25, 2019: Joe Biden - "The US is not ready for a pandemic." Donald Trump - "NEW iPHONE BAD"
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