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headlines found matching 'Pet'

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Mon May 23, 2022
	Pete Davidson's Best Life source: teenvogue.com \| share:	26
	SCOTUS rules that just because you had an incompetent defense attorney who failed to present evidence of your innocence doesn't mean you should get a new trial when you're found guilty, because that might make people mistrust the system source: cnn.com \| share:	153
	Wow. So fast. Much choo-choo source: bbc.com \| share:	6

Fri May 20, 2022
	Peter Schrager thought it was worth a shot to mention that Steve McNair is the most underrated quarterback of all-time source: thespun.com \| share:	16
	Pete Davidson breaks up with SNL, will soon be dating some ridiculously hot show you also wouldn't have a chance with source: avclub.com \| share:	80
	Ireland rolls out the red carpet for Ukrainian evacuees. Evacuees from 'less desirable' countries are told to go away source: cnn.com \| share:	55

Thu May 19, 2022
	Is Spot a good name for a pet Nope? source: msn.com \| share:	37
	Covid Convoy vows silent-but-deadly return to Washington, D.C. as they carpet-bomb nation's capital with more ignorant fart gas source: thedailybeast.com \| share:	58
	Orioles demonstrate the golden rule of sports: if at first you can't compete, change the dimensions of your ballpark source: espn.com \| share:	20
(Some Guy)	Happy 77th to Pete Townshend, rock and roll's most overt hypocrite source: thewho.com \| share:	35

Wed May 18, 2022
		If you're a Russian gymnast who's managed to find a competition in the world that will actually allow you to participate, maybe don't decide to wear a pro-war symbol on the award podium source: cnn.com \| share:	52

Tue May 17, 2022
	Olympia cougar sighting is no cause for alarm, officials say, and simply suggest keeping pets and young males indoors when possible source: king5.com \| share:	31
	So we can expect Rep Dan Crenshaw to be every bit as vocal in going after Tucker Carlson over this as he was with Pete Davidson after the SNL thing, right? Right? We can expect the TX Rep to harshly rebuke Tucker Carlson....any moment now source: twitter.com \| share:	68
	Today's 2-hour serving of '80s alt/post-punk/new wave includes music from The Damned, Big Country, The B-52's, and Peter Murphy. Hear what commercial radio doesn't sound like on pastFORWARD #343. Starts @ 1:00 PM ET, LGT streaming options source: kuci.org \| share:	152
	The final dance number from Dirty Dancing, but with the Muppet Show theme song instead source: twitter.com \| share:	53
	The concept of "personal space" applies only to "persons" thus it doesn't apply to these "pets" source: sadanduseless.com \| share:	17
	Most important fact from TFA: the CEO of the Humane Society of the United States is named "Kitty Block." Oh, and something about not keeping tigers as pets source: yahoo.com \| share:	1
	Citing awkward experience of both fighting and supplying Apple in smartphones, Samsung halts initiative to make its own EVs and compete with similar frenemies source: koreatimes.co.kr \| share:	8

Sun May 15, 2022
		Ohio man in furious competition with Florida man for his own tag source: 10tv.com \| share:	20

Fri May 13, 2022
		Pennsylvania might end up with a Senate candidate with a history of decrying systemic racism in the US and who started a petition to erect an Obama statue in DC. And then there will be a Democratic nominee running against them source: axios.com \| share:	40

Thu May 12, 2022
		Like competitions? Like the 90s? Not necessarily a fan of "Win Ben Stein's Money"? Try this instead: source: lifehacker.com \| share:	11

Wed May 11, 2022
	Amateur duffer loses Dungeons and Dragons Football bet, where the loser has to compete in a US Open qualifier. Fakes his golf pro status, ends up shooting a 112, and utterly befuddling the golf pros he got paired with source: golf.com \| share:	12
	"Donald Sutherland as the Clumsy Waiter" source: sudbury.com \| share:	4

Tue May 10, 2022
	Carpet pythons invade Australian home for breeding season, use performance enhancing rugs source: upi.com \| share:	25
(Some property listing)	Charming cottage for sale; previously inhabited by reclusive man and his pit bull ... wait, I'm getting a correction ... pet bull. Half-ton pet bull source: rightmove.co.uk \| share:	21
	"It is absolutely normal to wake up in our house with one of OUR dogs in the bed with us. One small problem, THIS IS NOT OUR DOG" source: abc7.com \| share:	16

Mon May 09, 2022
	Wanna open a record store in my hometown. Talk me out of it source: fark.com \| share:	112
	If your friend asks you to look after his or her pet deadly puff adder, perhaps you should politely but firmly decline (possible nsfw content on page) source: dailystar.co.uk \| share:	6
	Peter Thiel's massive intelligence company Palantir has lost nearly 90% of its value in the past 18 months. Perhaps they should have seen this coming source: barrons.com \| share:	21

Sun May 08, 2022
	What's that? We're coming up on a year since Gabby Petito was murdered? Well, hell. THERE'S MONEY TO BE MADE, BOYS source: nbcwashington.com \| share:	52
	The 40 most expensive restaurants in America. Might want to save up those coupons for free appetizers and BOGO free for these places source: esquire.com \| share:	49

Sat May 07, 2022
	Will SNL unleash a multiverse of madness? Will Laura Ingraham and Jeanine Pirro gush over JD Vance? Will Pete Davidson return tonight? Will there be name jokes? Benedict Cumberbatch hosts and Arcade Fire are musical guests. SNL, 11:30PM ET on NBC source: deadline.com \| share:	277
	Pete Davidson loves mocking Kanye West, as do we all source: nme.com \| share:	62
	Turns out that COVID has more waves than a Hawaiian surf competition source: cnn.com \| share:	38

Fri May 06, 2022
	Checking in on perpetually indicted Texas AG Ken Paxton: He's opening an investigation against the State Bar after they sue him for misconduct. Did we mention the abuse of power allegations? source: texastribune.org \| share:	26
	According to Peter Doocy, only right wingers have the right to protest source: thenewcivilrightsmovement.com \| share:	52

Thu May 05, 2022
	Good luck, Peter source: lgbtqnation.com \| share:	78
	Johnny Sex Day 4: Will Rags & Pens give us another multi-OT thriller? Will the Pretty Kitties punish Putin's Puppet? Will the Perds bother to take the ice? Which oil & cattle rich sub-national administrative division will reign supreme? Pucks @7pm ET source: nhl.com \| share:	629
	You too can live life in the ruff with this cozy dog bed made for humans source: odditycentral.com \| share:	5
	Peter Falk, John Cassavetes' basset hound, and a Jaguar. Oh, and just one more thing: if you know, you know source: avclub.com \| share:	23

Wed May 04, 2022
	$uperPACs are prohibited by law from coordinating with candidates. The runaround: Peter Thiel's $uperPAC simply published their information and strategy on Medium blog directed towards Vance's campaign, and they ran with it source: politico.com \| share:	27
	Kim Kardashian wears Marilyn's iconic vintage "Happy Birthday" dress that she borrowed from museum to Met Gala. Later that night, she plans to have sex with Pete Davidson wearing Neil Armstrong's spacesuit on the chair that Lincoln was shot in source: thedailybeast.com \| share:	75
	After spending 500 days in the shelter, unlucky Liam becomes lucky Liam when the Humane Society Pet Rescue & Adoption Center in Gadsden posted a Tik Tok about him on their page, leading to him being adopted just in time for Woofday Wetnose Wednesday source: gadsdentimes.com \| share:	201

Tue May 03, 2022
	Europe's biomass appetite is harming the US south, which is a surprise considering the biomass that results from southern cooking source: aljazeera.com \| share:	30
	Pete Davidson ups the OJ probabilities source: metro.co.uk \| share:	47
	Adrian Peterson decides to switch things up to beat the system source: larrybrownsports.com \| share:	9
	Twenty years ago today, "Spider-Man" debuted and rescued the superhero genre with the best version of Peter Parker to date source: variety.com \| share:	37

Mon May 02, 2022
	In the AZ GOP senate primary, the AZ attorney general who did his job and refused to embrace "the big lie" is now losing to the rich guy who used to work for insane billionaire Peter Thiel after a $4million ad blitz upended the race source: politico.com \| share:	71
	Plastered party pilot pushes pedal-pub past peril point, passengers petrified. Police probing predicament ponder potential PUI proceedings source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	21
	Scientists have created an enzyme that can break down plastic waste in hours, not decades. Enough about plastic surgeons' work source: sciencealert.com \| share:	35
	What we need are a bunch of money-laundering operations conveniently located in New York City, the shining citadel of ethical, competent government source: gothamist.com \| share:	16

Sun May 01, 2022
		Amazon to convert their warehouses into petri dishes source: finance.yahoo.com \| share:	18

Fri April 29, 2022
		First, they were used for pregnancy tests and later they became pets. Now, the African horned frog, one of the worst invasive species on Earth, is eating its way through western Washington source: oregonlive.com \| share:	30

Thu April 28, 2022
	Are you a Farker in your fifties? Now'd be a great time to get off the couch and take up snowboarding, while you still have decades of competitive life ahead of you source: stripes.com \| share:	14
	Facebook: Tee hee, we're just too gosh-darn incompetent to comply with your pesky privacy laws. Anyway, back to doing whatever we feel like with zero repercussions source: vice.com \| share:	69
	My favorite allergy song is "Blowin' in the Wind" by Peter, Pollen Mary. It's your Bad Joke Thursday Thread source: google.com \| share:	61
	Actors announce rally in Hollywood to demand that they not be given a shot in the competitive industry source: deadline.com \| share:	49

Wed April 27, 2022
	Tucker Carlson concerning Kevin McCarthy: "[W]e will have a Republican Congress led by a puppet of the Democratic Party" source: mediaite.com \| share:	42
	Keep your pets safe from toxic algae. Know how to recognize an algal bloom, know the symptoms of exposure, know what to do in case of ingestion source: twitter.com \| share:	3

Tue April 26, 2022
		Hope you enjoyed the stories of St. Peter's, UMBC and Florida Gulf Coast because the power brokers are about to rescind Cinderella's invite to the Big Dance source: pennlive.com \| share:	9

Mon April 25, 2022
	Having algorithmed America into a rage-addicted cesspool of partisan hate, Facebook now sets their sights on destroying Africa with evil incompetence source: theguardian.com \| share:	34
	Boris Johnson's increasing desperate supporters are claiming that he act like an unhinged Muppet during Prime Minister's Questions, because a female opposition member keeps distracting him by crossing and uncrossing her legs WHILE WEARING A SKIRT source: uk.news.yahoo.com \| share:	64
	Pet squirrel "goes nuts" on burglar source: kivitv.com \| share:	33
	Cockatiel who dances to the theme song from "The Andy Griffith Show," a 1960s television show, saved by Orca source: pennlive.com \| share:	4
	Dog park is pet friendly source: twitter.com \| share:	43

Sun April 24, 2022
	Sorry, cats and dogs, you are hereby demoted to third class pet citizens. These otters are now in charge of amusing hoomans source: youtube.com \| share:	12
	Man arrested for carrying 99 fentanyl pills charged with felony intent to distribute. Officer who stole the same 99 pills for resale charged with petit larceny source: koco.com \| share:	75

Sat April 23, 2022
		"At the time, it felt like some shadowy, powerful figures were forcing "Macarena" on us - like it was part of some grand experiment on the effect of repetitive sounds on collective mental health" source: stereogum.com \| share:	39

Fri April 22, 2022
		Atheist Florida Man acting under Chapter 2022-21 petitions eight FL school districts to ban the Christian Bible from classrooms and libraries, citing age inappropriateness, social-emotional learning, mentions of bestiality and rape, and "wokeness" source: miaminewtimes.com \| share:	139

Thu April 21, 2022
	Good doggos having their bestess birthdays EVAR (exclamation marks & SQUEES) source: sadanduseless.com \| share:	10
	The intellectuals of the new right also kiss Peter Thiel's ring source: vanityfair.com \| share:	80
	My dog, Becky, and my cat Becky - they're both named Becky - actually the iguana's named Becky, too. And the ferret. And the cockatoo. All victim to the hallucinogenic effects of marijuana source: cnn.com \| share:	60
	My dog, Becky, and my cat Becky - they're both named Becky - actually the iguana's named Becky, too. And the ferret. And the cockatoo. All victim to the hallucinogenic effects of marijuana source: cnn.com \| share:	60

Wed April 20, 2022
	This being Woofday Wednesday and 4/20, please keep your edibles away from your dogs please source: gizmodo.com \| share:	29
	For seven years, Eric Hoff and his dog, Remy, have been members of Denver Health's Pet Therapy team, bringing smiles and laughter to those they visit. Please welcome them and the rest of the team to this week's Woofday Wetnose Wednesday source: thedenverchannel.com \| share:	216

Tue April 19, 2022
		The race for the GOP nomination for Senator in PA is going to come down to a carpetbagging millionaire snake oil salesman and a carpetbagging millionaire hedge fund executive. Unless the carpetbagging millionaire real estate mogul plays spoiler source: msn.com \| share:	53

Mon April 18, 2022
		Despite heavy competition, Anatoly Antonov has become Washington's least popular man source: politico.com \| share:	31

Sat April 16, 2022
(Some Númenórean)		Of course there's a Russian unauthorized adaptation of "The Lord of the Rings" in which orcs are the good guys, Mordor was a glorious utopia, and the people of Middle-Earth were brainwashed puppets of the superpower on a distant western continent source: labrujulaverde.com \| share:	140

Fri April 15, 2022
	Fox News shill 'TORCHES' WH press secretary Jen Psaki for calling Fox News shill Peter Doocy a stupid son of a biatch since he works at Fox News source: twitter.com \| share:	70
	A) Can I afford to quit now? B) Will be my new boss be as spineless, incompetent, and worthless? C) Is the new commute easier? D) How much spoiled, rancid fish should I nuke in the break room before striding out, fingerguns a-blazing? source: cnbc.com \| share:	9
	'Pizza Rat' has fresh competition for NYC's grossest vermin: 'Smoking Roach' source: nypost.com \| share:	34

Thu April 14, 2022
	A California company to pay $930,000 for illegally leasing dogs to Massachusetts residents. Wait, you can lease a dog? source: masslive.com \| share:	40
	Machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox are giving the "we just fought in the car before we got here" vibes on the red carpet when she dodges his kiss source: wild955.iheart.com \| share:	45
	Sydney firefighters save pet bunny from becoming hasenpfeffer, just in time for Easter source: 9news.com.au \| share:	1

Wed April 13, 2022
	Unlike the USFL unfiring Todd Haley, the XFL decides to hire fully competent, experienced coaches like Wade Phillips, Bob Stoops, and Hines Ward source: profootballtalk.nbcsports.com \| share:	21
	Just in case you missed Tamagotchi, Neopets, et cetera source: ign.com \| share:	25
(Sorry Anti-Vaxxer)	Looks like Covid has yet to lose its insatiable appetite for soft, pink right-wing radio personality flesh source: sorryantivaxxer.com \| share:	105

Tue April 12, 2022
	Russian war is making fertilizer less crunchy and appetizing source: apnews.com \| share:	34
	That face you make when you go from being Putin's puppet to Zelenskyy's prisoner source: twitter.com \| share:	94
	Competition has driven down the cost of launching space payloads to the point that we can start seriously considering launching a FarkSat source: nbcnews.com \| share:	12

Mon April 11, 2022
	The Federline boys are getting some competition for their inheritance source: jezebel.com \| share:	49
	Because any coach who can't build a championship team with Russell Westbrook is clearly incompetent source: espn.com \| share:	47

Sun April 10, 2022
		Discuss wages and we will fire your ass and we won't face any legal percussion. No word on trumpets or clarinets, though source: twitter.com \| share:	87

Sat April 09, 2022
	Will we see Ingraham and Pirro melt down over Ketanji Brown Jackson? Will Che and Jost win the night? Will we see a Please Don't Destroy video? Will Pete Davidson appear live? Jake Gyllenhaal hosts, Camila Cabello sings. SNL, 11:30PM ET on NBC source: yahoo.com \| share:	354
	Saturday Night MMA: UFC 273, Alexander Volkanovski vs Chan Sung Jun "The Korean Zombie", Aljamain Sterling vs Petr Yan II. Fight Pass prelims at 6:30 PM ET, TV prelims at 8 PM ET on ESPN and ESPN+, PPV main card at 10 PM ET source: ufc.com \| share:	391

Fri April 08, 2022
	Tiger tee time at 1:40 eastern, lots of other guys already competing in Augusta for the neverfull $11,500,00 purse source: masters.com \| share:	37
	Like your crazy MAGAt uncle, Peter Thiel declares war on billionaires over Bitcoin source: fortune.com \| share:	65
	Missouri school board guarantees that no competent teacher will ever work in that district again source: news-leader.com \| share:	137

Thu April 07, 2022
	Microsoft Edge edges out the competition buy being edgy, promoting users to install edge even when it is already installed. Edge. Download it now source: techradar.com \| share:	31
	Today's 2-hr serving of '80s alt/post-punk/new wave includes music from Wang Chung, Shonen Knife, That Petrol Emotion, and more. Hear what commercial radio doesn't sound like on pastFORWARD #330. Starts @ 1:00 PM ET, LGT streaming options source: kuci.org \| share:	132
	When visiting exotic pet stores, take special care around serval cats. "I turned around to see what was behind me and that's when the cat grabbed my child" source: whnt.com \| share:	92
	Peter Davison thinks David Tennant is not that special source: dailyrecord.co.uk \| share:	30

Wed April 06, 2022
(Colorado Sun)	Mike Lindell claims he gave "three, four or five, maybe $800,000" to the Tina Peters defense fund and that she "probably" traveled on his private jet to the CyberPillow symposium source: coloradosun.com \| share:	59
	Off went Pete. "Grumble, grumble," said the owners source: espn.com \| share:	11
	"Kim Kardashian Says She's 'Very Happy and Very Content' with Boyfriend Pete Davidson" - are mental health issues kinks a thing? source: people.com \| share:	39

Mon April 04, 2022
	Advocates pushing to end housing discrimination. Difficulty: for dogs source: dallasobserver.com \| share:	56
	Advocates pushing to end housing discrimination. Difficulty: for dogs source: dallasobserver.com \| share:	56
	Orlando suburb learns that escaped pet rabbits reproduce like, well, like rabbits source: foxnews.com \| share:	16

Sun April 03, 2022
		Learning nothing from competitors who tried similar things, Flickr plans to paywall the ability to upload NSFW images source: techcrunch.com \| share:	17

Sat April 02, 2022
	Will the Oscars slap and Jada be mocked by Chris Redd and this week's host? Will Weekend Update prove once again to be the best satire around? Will Pete Davidson emerge from hiding? Jerrod Carmichael hosts, Gunna raps. SNL, 11:30PM ET on NBC source: avclub.com \| share:	239
(Some Guy)	Montana GOP pays for election recount to confirm that no voter fraud occurred in 2020, in effort to stem tide of Republicans vowing not to vote due to phony fraud claims perpetuated by Montana GOP source: montanafreepress.org \| share:	58
	Tim McCarver retires from sports broadcasting. Sports are competitive matches between opposing players or teams, and broadcasting is what analysts do on television to describe what's happening. Retirement is the act of no longer doing this source: awfulannouncing.com \| share:	12

Thu March 31, 2022
	Finally, Peter Dinklage will have a large, um...part source: france24.com \| share:	7
(Quill memorandum)	Ugly-ass porcupette has mystery sex source: news.wttw.com \| share:	3

Wed March 30, 2022
	After 4 years under one of the worst and most incompetent presidents in US history, MSN and Bloomberg ask the burning question: is Biden fit to serve? source: msn.com \| share:	99
	Both Koreas seem to be in some sort of competition involving the display of large cylindrical objects that could be representitive of something else source: npr.org \| share:	15
	Elvira Nabiullina is the governor of Russia's central bank, Putin's closest economic advisor, & is viewed in the West as extremely competent. Here's how sanctions are going to destroy the Russian economy she built. Oh, and Putin won't let her leave source: aljazeera.com \| share:	66
	With Netflix greenlighting yet another Nu Iron Chef series, let's remember the original and best Iron Chef from Japan featuring Chairman Kaga and the bell pepper, a show that defined reality TV's wildly popular competitive cooking genre source: theguardian.com \| share:	43

Tue March 29, 2022
	Here are the 5 people you've never heard of who will be riding the Cockrocket into space on Thursday instead of Pete Davidson source: cnn.com \| share:	6
	As it relates to the NCAA Tournament, St. Peter's helped CBS become the Peacock Network source: thebiglead.com \| share:	9
	The January 6th Committee voted to hold Peter Navarro and Dan Scavino in contempt of Congress yadda yadda who cares but Jamie Raskin was on fire tonight source: c-span.org \| share:	48

Mon March 28, 2022
	Fark-ready headline: "Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene said Pete Buttigieg and his husband should 'stay out of girls' bathrooms'" source: msn.com \| share:	99
	Clubs propose changes to the Champions League that allow 'Historic Clubs' into the competition, even if they didn't qualify though actually winning games source: theguardian.com \| share:	18
	Putting the "moo" in "smooch" source: sadanduseless.com \| share:	4

Sun March 27, 2022
	Have you ever had to pay to submit a taxi or airport lost & found claim, or post a missing pet? If so, you probably helped make this jerk $650,000 for nothing (ask how I know) source: nypost.com \| share:	42
	For the second day of the Elite Eight, can Miami upset Kansas and make it to the Final Four for the first time (2:20 PM ET on CBS)? Can St. Peter's keep their Cinderella run going against UNC (5:05 PM ET on CBS)? Find out on this awesome Sunday source: espn.com \| share:	200

Sat March 26, 2022
(Some Tuber)	Photoshop Peter Glazebrook and his stunning beetroot source: images.wsj.net \| share:	19
	Blue Jays pitching coach Pete Walker soon to be living up to his name source: wfla.com \| share:	7
	A 15 seed has never made it to the NCAA Elite Eight. St. Peter's: hold my basketball (and the NJ Governor's original broken bracket) source: cbssports.com \| share:	33

Fri March 25, 2022
	F1 Saudi Grand Prix in crisis after terrorist attack causes massive explosion and blazing inferno at petroleum facility. Please think of the Saudi Arabian Grand Prix ...and your rising gas prices once again (possible nsfw content on page) source: dailystar.co.uk \| share:	88
	Sure Trump won't face charges in New York because of an incompetent DA, but that doesn't mean he's not guilty source: motherjones.com \| share:	117
	The Sweet Sixteen round continues with Cinderella St. Peter's battling Purdue at 7:09 PM ET on CBS, Providence battling Kansas at 7:29 on TBS, UNC and UCLA at 9:39 PM on CBS, and the battle of weather with Cyclones and Hurricanes at 9:59 PM ET on TBS source: espn.com \| share:	333
	Peter Navarro and Dan Scavino, come on down. You're the next contestants on FAFO source: politico.com \| share:	39
	Billion-dollar Russian miner Petropavlovsk now a penny miner due to war. О нет. В любом случае source: bnnbloomberg.ca \| share:	5
	Angry nipping chihuahuas terrorize entire town, locals looking for ways to dress them up like footballs to rid themselves of them source: metro.co.uk \| share:	40

Tue March 22, 2022
	I have no idea what you're talking about, so here's a goat being friendly with a cat by petting it source: twitter.com \| share:	8
	How has the vastly outnumbered Ukrainian Air Force managed to keep Russia from achieving air superiority in the war? Let's just say Russia pilots are about as competent as their ground-based troops...and the same is true of the Ukrainian pilots source: msn.com \| share:	185
	Competition among worm sperm speeds up evolution. Despite their yearns and hard-earned turns, spurned germs remain taciturn while this brainworm is affirmed long-term source: phys.org \| share:	3
	Peter Doocy is responsible for this, somehow source: nbcwashington.com \| share:	16
	If you're serious about kitchen organizing, you need this spice rack. If you're serious about cooking, why the fark would you be looking at a site called Bon Appetit? source: bonappetit.com \| share:	35
	Negligent owner abandons pet dog for being gay; didn't even try dog conversion therapy first source: advocate.com \| share:	74
(OneWeb)	SpaceX will launch its competitor's satellite constellation using its Falcon 9 brooms. Suck it Russia source: oneweb.net \| share:	15
	A device to better transport organs wins University of Chicago startup competition. Next project will include pianos, guitars and glockenspiels source: bizjournals.com \| share:	12

Mon March 21, 2022
	A Colorado school district sent a letter to families last week saying it will halt valedictorian awards since it singles out the best performer in a class. They declared 'learning is not a competition'. Some parents have an issue with this source: dailymail.co.uk \| share:	161
	Huge, three-footed gator visits golf course, plays through. Chubbs Peterson unavailable for comment source: tmz.com \| share:	7
	As global brands shun Russia over Ukraine aggression, Asian firms remain, offering Russian citizens the chance to buy competing products such as Sunbucks Coffee or the lead-lined hIpad for a mere six trillion rubles source: aljazeera.com \| share:	37
	Is Saturday really for the boys? Pete Davidson posts video from his tragically "wild night" with Scott Disick and other bros source: wild955.iheart.com \| share:	18
(Maus house)	Neil Gaiman's iconic character 'Dream' is based on Peter Murphy of Bauhaus source: faroutmagazine.co.uk \| share:	22
	When you are considered so obnoxious, self-absorbed and incompetent that you're the one making it more likely by the day that Trump will be prosecuted, and you DON'T have the same last name as him? Well, that's so bad its almost impressive source: thedailybeast.com \| share:	79
	How pets are being evacuated from Ukraine and how you can help source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	3

Sun March 20, 2022
		For Pete's Sake source: espn.com \| share:	13

Sat March 19, 2022
	Peter Gabriel provides vocals for new Arcade Fire track, pushing back the release of his next new material to 2038 source: noise11.com \| share:	17
	Pricipal. Caught sayof students are asshats in email. Is she fired or not. St. Pete Times, Chad unavailable for comment source: masslive.com \| share:	107
	If you are going to rob an AirBnB of appliances and electronics, don't use your actual ID when making the booking source: fox23.com \| share:	19

Fri March 18, 2022
	Kentucky's championship hopes were dead when they met St. Peter's source: sports.yahoo.com \| share:	48
	PETA thinks the term 'Horse Collar Tackle' should be changed to a name that's less offensive to equines source: thespun.com \| share:	38
	Pete Davidson aborts his trip to space source: twitter.com \| share:	49

Thu March 17, 2022
	Never has a carpet been more suitable for a game of 'the floor is lava' source: zillow.com \| share:	79
	In what can only be described as an exercise in good judgment and long-term planning, Pete Davidson has gotten Kim Kardashians' name branded onto his skin source: metro.co.uk \| share:	66
	Apparently people in Lincoln look like dogs source: mirror.co.uk \| share:	2
	Apparently people in Lincoln look like dogs source: mirror.co.uk \| share:	2

Wed March 16, 2022
	.25's too little, two years too late source: cnbc.com \| share:	14
	General Petraeus explains in detail what's what with the current state of the war in Ukraine; why the Russians suck, how the Ukrainians are kicking their ass, that China is pissed, that Putin is farked, that Biden is the man source: cnn.com \| share:	82
	Kanye West attacks paparazzi in LA, must have thought the guy was Pete Davidson source: wild955.iheart.com \| share:	28
	Jake Paul offers Kanye and Pete Davidson $60 million to hash it out in the ring source: realradio921.iheart.com \| share:	38
	Please do not pet the Great White Sharks. They are not pets. Thank you (possible nsfw content on page) source: dailystar.co.uk \| share:	5

Tue March 15, 2022
	When you find out about all the trouble your pets are getting into while you're at work source: youtube.com \| share:	5
	It's great that you support Ukraine, but blue and gold sausages aren't appetizing source: mcall.com \| share:	18

Mon March 14, 2022
	Pete Alonso feels "blessed" after his car flipped three times. Blessed is not getting in a wreck in the first place source: espn.com \| share:	13
	Russia's Ukraine invasion incompetence trifecta: done in one source: theconversation.com \| share:	116

Sun March 13, 2022
	"Pete Davidson: Yo, it's Skete. Calm down and grow up. Kanye: Oh yeah? Where ya at? Pete Davidson: In bed with your wife". Never have I ever seen a more brutal text exchange. Please be true source: thedailybeast.com \| share:	124
	Sometimes dead is better source: nypost.com \| share:	47

Sat March 12, 2022
	Will we be introduced to a new Putin? Will the inevitable Batman send up be worth the time? Will we get a new Please Don't Destroy video this week? Is Pete Davidson still hiding from Kanye? Zoe Kravitz hosts, Rosalia sings. SNL, 11:30PM ET on NBC source: deadline.com \| share:	332
	Not to be outdone by Tuckyo Rose, OAN puppet is jUsT aSkInG qUeStIoNs source: wonkette.com \| share:	41

Thu March 10, 2022
	The one resident who hasn't fled this southern Ukrainian town because of the invasion is an orthopaedic doctor who's standing guard with his two pets: a panther and a leopard source: vice.com \| share:	62
	A former Arizona Cardinals linebacker is helping Claire make videos, and Lifehacker readers are surly about it source: lifehacker.com \| share:	13
	Does Peter Doocy secretly love being destroyed by Jen Psaki? If you think about it, that kinda makes sense now source: twitter.com \| share:	130
	Yo dawg, Lorne Michaels herd you like Pete Davidson, so he's casting Pete Davidson in a comedy series about Pete Davidson, so you can watch Pete Davidson while you watch Pete Davidson source: avclub.com \| share:	43

Wed March 09, 2022
	You might think a movie with Matthew McConaughey, Kate Beckinsale, Peter Dinklage, Patricia Arquette, and Gary Oldman would be pretty good. You'd be wrong. What are some other movies that are a complete waste of talent? source: imdb.com \| share:	123
	You too can re-live memories of your favourite Halifax nightclub with a square of sticky carpet for just £5 source: bbc.com \| share:	26

Tue March 08, 2022
	Lithuanian 'elves' are taking on what Facebook is either too incompetent -- or too evil -- to handle itself source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	40
	Today's 4-hr serving of '80s alt/post-punk/new wave includes music from New Model Army, New Order, Peter Gabriel, and The Lilac Time. Hear what commercial radio doesn't sound like on pastFORWARD #322. Starts @ 1:00 PM ET, LGT streaming options source: kuci.org \| share:	140

Mon March 07, 2022
	Petroleum leak from US Navy fuel farm in Hawaii upgraded from "contaminated water" to "SHUT EVERYTHING DOWN PERMANENTLY" source: cnn.com \| share:	29
	Monday Premier League has hot & cold Spurs hosting hot & cold (but mostly cold) Everton. Spurs are on the edge of Euro competition, Everton on the edge of relegation. 3:00 pm ET on USA source: scores.nbcsports.com \| share:	77
	Today's Slatesplanation: Sure, that "Freedom Convoy" threatening Washington D.C. is made up of the same sort of misguided terrorists who perpetrated 1/6, but we need to understand that their concerns, however fictional, are real to them source: slate.com \| share:	63

Sun March 06, 2022
		DC government manages to lose money running a sports betting operation, be more incompetent than Dan Snyder source: dcist.com \| share:	20

Sat March 05, 2022
	Will we be treated to a lavish Dune parody? Will Kyle Mooney ruin a sketch? Will Please Don't Destroy deliver again? Is Pete Davidson in hiding from Kanye? Oscar Isaac hosts, Charli XCX is the musical guest. Saturday Night Live, 11:30PM ET on NBC source: deadline.com \| share:	352
	Cyprus gets in on the action to tell the obviously competent Russian navy to go f*ck themselves when they run out of fuel source: twitter.com \| share:	175
	On this day in 1973, New York Yankees pitchers Mike Kekich and Fritz Peterson made a stunning declaration: the left-handers announced that they had traded wives, children, and family dogs. The '70s were a wild time, man source: twitter.com \| share:	17

Fri March 04, 2022
	Research finds dog walking creates social bonds within communities, cat juggling an internet skill source: phys.org \| share:	12
	Research finds dog walking creates social bonds within communities, cat juggling an internet skill source: phys.org \| share:	12

Thu March 03, 2022
	Research on the pet-human bond has boomed in the pandemic. Here's who wants back-pay steaks source: cnn.com \| share:	8
	Research on the pet-human bond has boomed in the pandemic. Here's who wants back-pay steaks source: cnn.com \| share:	8
	Kanye forever memorialized his hatred for Pete Davidson by literally burying the comedian in a grave in his new music video, "Eazy" source: wild955.iheart.com \| share:	54
	Russian and Belarusian athletes are officially banned from competing in the winter Paralympics source: espn.com \| share:	68

Wed March 02, 2022
	Fed by Puppet is the first album released from my new band, Orphaned Owlet source: click2houston.com \| share:	2
	"It's taken me a while to figure out what [the Russians are] trying to do, because it looks so ridiculous and incompetent. This isn't a good army executing a bad plan. It isn't a good army executing outdated or out-of-context tactics. It's a bad army" source: msn.com \| share:	210
(Some Guy)	FIA: Nikita Mazepin can still compete. British Grand Prix: piss off, you wanker source: the-race.com \| share:	5
	LeBron James: 'Until you bury me 12 feet under, then I got a chance, because deep down I am a very competitive player.' source: espn.com \| share:	11
	Woman takes offence at neighbour's Boner source: mirror.co.uk \| share:	14
	Woman takes offence at neighbour's Boner source: mirror.co.uk \| share:	14
	Is it just me or does this two-story tall prehensile-tailed porcupine puppet look high as balls? source: twitter.com \| share:	4

Tue March 01, 2022
	"I'm common as muck and spent £150 in a Michelin star restaurant to see if it was worth it". Come read how much she enjoyed her one appetizer source: birminghammail.co.uk \| share:	27
	C'mon, Tsarevich Carlson and Lil' Donnie Puppet, let's hear you put your sycophantic spin on this one source: dailyboulder.com \| share:	53

Mon February 28, 2022
		It's time to end the music on The Marpet Show tonight source: yardbarker.com \| share:	6

Sun February 27, 2022
	Welcome to the start of the season. Scott McLaughlin has the pole with Will Power alongside and Jimmie Johnson starting in the rear. Forecast is sunny and warm. This is your Indycar Grand Prix of St. Petersburg at Noon ET on NBC source: indycar.com \| share:	114
	It took James Harden one game to make as many 3-pointers as Ben Simmons made in his career. And you better believe Philadelphia was going to be petty about it source: ftw.usatoday.com \| share:	16

Sat February 26, 2022
		Ten years ago today, Pete Webber broke the fourth wall source: twitter.com \| share:	24

Fri February 25, 2022
	Pete Davidson breaks his silence and says Kanye didn't run him off of Instagram...even if all of Kanye's followers keep calling him "Skete" source: wild955.iheart.com \| share:	50
	"Our companies would never take advantage of this kind of situation" nudge nudge wink wink - American Petroleum Institute CEO Mike Sommers source: cnn.com \| share:	25
	Cesaro is leaving the WWE. However, due to the fact that he didn't have a no-compete clause in his contract, he should be unemployed for about 20 minutes or so source: cinemablend.com \| share:	31
	CPAC descends into petty infighting over Ukraine blame source: salon.com \| share:	99

Thu February 24, 2022
	Seeing his villainy rank declining, Yertle eases himself gently onto the puppet master's waiting hand source: twitter.com \| share:	89
	Doggos mourn their passed doggos too. Here comes the pack science source: gizmodo.com \| share:	16
	Mamba is the peppery, pugnacious Haitian peanut butter that would prickle Peter Pan source: atlasobscura.com \| share:	10
	Trying to anticipate all the things your pets can ruin found to be good for mental acuity source: cnn.com \| share:	2

Wed February 23, 2022
	Dog shark gets a new carpet, swims around for treats source: twitter.com \| share:	7
(Some Guy)	Peter Doocy now has a reason to hate Rob Lowe source: primetimer.com \| share:	21
	South Park releases 25th anniversary orchestral version of "Chocolate Salty Balls". Chef and Pete Schweddy unavailable for comment source: variety.com \| share:	27

Tue February 22, 2022
	Olympics done, ordinary athletes can't compete with supers. 1ˢᵗ, Lana & Kyle help Sarah prepare to "Girl... You'll Be a Woman Soon", S.№2 Ep.№5 of Superman & Lois at 8 ㏘ EDT. Then Dee trains Naomi on Ep.№5 "Shadow Ridge" at 9, both on The CW source: imdb.com \| share:	11
	Donuts now being served at Petco Park source: fox5sandiego.com \| share:	9
	Reason #1 why pets turn on their caretakers: hats source: sadanduseless.com \| share:	24
	Looks like Mesa County Clerk Tina Peters will have plenty of company with all of the people abusing the 911 call system source: 9news.com \| share:	53
	FTA: When the recent COVID-19 wave fueled by the omicron variant hit the U.S., no one expected it would lead to the number of deaths it did. Excluding the WHO, CDC, any competent doctors, and NHS. Subby asks you, who knew COVID could be this complex? source: abcnews.go.com \| share:	51

Mon February 21, 2022
	California lawmakers are attempting to extend Bill of Rights to encourage birth control, require medical care, adequate exercise, belly scritches, and nutritious food for all source: ktla.com \| share:	42
	California lawmakers are attempting to extend Bill of Rights to encourage birth control, require medical care, adequate exercise, belly scritches, and nutritious food for all source: ktla.com \| share:	42
(Some Guy)	🎵 Oompa loompa doompety doo / I've got a perfect reason I'm blue / Oompa loompa doompety dee / It's all the hours I work at Hershey 🎵 source: themountain.news \| share:	14

Sun February 20, 2022
		And how do we know all these storms aren't just a hoax perpetrated by Big Meteorology? source: twitter.com \| share:	89

Fri February 18, 2022
	Amateur group of predator catchers just Meta high profile perpetrator source: techcrunch.com \| share:	38
	Denying a spot on the wrestling team to a girl & forfeiting that weight class match every meet because "Alpha males won't go to our school if she competes" is further proof women should be in charge of more things source: sports.yahoo.com \| share:	48
	NSFW or appetites: You won't want a cupcake for a looooong time afterwards should you choose to read this article source: nbcmontana.com \| share:	88

Wed February 16, 2022
	Real Life Peter Griffin Hates Winter source: youtube.com \| share:	29
	Luke has been at the Battersea Dogs & Cats Home for over 200 days without being adopted, despite them throwing an adoption party that no one attended. May the force be with Luke in finding his forever family in time for Woofday Wetnose Wednesday source: people.com \| share:	202

Tue February 15, 2022
	Maybe it's time for a pet tarantula source: twitter.com \| share:	45
	Two Olympians fail drug tests. One gets banned, the other gets to compete. Care to guess the difference? source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	41
	The German chancellor visits Putin, finally gives an actual logical reason for the weird staring competition table. Oh and Germany makes a very concrete and plausible threat, whilst Russia starts withdrawing troops, but never mind, table solved source: dw.com \| share:	62
	Pete Townshend once sang ' I hope I die before I get old'. Now he's singing 'I hope I don't get too old and die on stage' source: audacy.com \| share:	44

Mon February 14, 2022
(Some Once Iowan)	What do Pete Best, baseball bats and your mom have in common? A foreign beetle that eats ash and leaves D shaped exit holes source: nwestiowa.com \| share:	10
	Funny head shot of cute red Cobberdog puppy, standing facing front. Looking curious towards camera. Isolated on white background. Tongue out source: fox2now.com \| share:	2
	Local reporter decides to waste a day on full pay by taking a visit to a Pet Psychic who communicates with her Scottish Terrier in Brazil. The experience goes pretty much as you'd expect source: kentonline.co.uk \| share:	34
	Head of Indian stock exchange a puppet of some yogi. Isn't that right, Booboo? source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	4
	Adrian Peterson arrested for domestic violence. This is not a repeat from 2014 source: profootballtalk.nbcsports.com \| share:	14

Sat February 12, 2022
		"My neighbor's new pet is turning my daughter into a bad person. What do?" source: slate.com \| share:	32

Fri February 11, 2022
	Kanye drops new track/open threat to Pete Davidson source: tmz.com \| share:	95
	Commander Biden to make television debut at Puppy Bowl source: thehill.com \| share:	33
	Peter Navarro's disastrous interview should spell Club Fed source: thenewcivilrightsmovement.com \| share:	56
	Why aren't moderate Christians condemning the extremists who perpetrated the 1/6 insurrection? source: religionnews.com \| share:	134

Thu February 10, 2022
		Free Rats source: whdh.com \| share:	56

Wed February 09, 2022
	Peter Navarro subpoenaed by the January 6th Committee to ask him about that whole "Green Bay sweep" thing and about the 100 or so Congresspeople involved in the coup plot source: twitter.com \| share:	84
	Colorado MyPillow clerk Tina Peters seems to be a firm believer of "in for a penny, in for a pound" source: thedenverchannel.com \| share:	52
	Sony A1 camera outfit worth $9K sneaks into the Olympics big air competition, survives to shoot again the following day source: petapixel.com \| share:	16

Tue February 08, 2022
	Only reason to watch the winter Olympics: competitors from countries without snow source: dw.com \| share:	17
	Former bank CEO sentenced to one year of prison for incompetently trying to buy a job in the Trump administration source: justice.gov \| share:	48
	An international search is on for a missing 16th Century painting worth millions (It was last seen in the Scottish fishing port of Peterhead in 1904 and measures 12ft by 6ft) source: bbc.co.uk \| share:	34

Mon February 07, 2022
	Something is causing an outbreak of gastrointestinal illness among pet dogs in the United Kingdom. Could it just be British cooking? source: gizmodo.com \| share:	11
	Peter Thiel steps down from Facebook board to spend more time with blood from virgins source: cnbc.com \| share:	70
	"My husband and I had a threesome. It was, in a word, terrible. Now, I have doubts about my husband and his moral character. Could this be an impetus for divorce?" source: slate.com \| share:	82

Sun February 06, 2022
		The best advice you can get about researching a 1912 recipe for Tennessee Nut Crumpets is "Don't Google 'nut crumpets'" source: youtube.com \| share:	15

Sat February 05, 2022
	MET/PAC, ATL/CEN, then WIN/WIN for a million bucks. Although the grand prize not being a lifetime supply of Turtle Wax is yet another example of Bergman's incompetence. Puck drops for the 2022 NHL All-Star 3-on-3 tournament @ 3:00pm ET on ABC source: nhl.com \| share:	19
	Party of perpetual victimhood is really bad at analogies source: talkingpointsmemo.com \| share:	96
	Blanche the bobcat was stolen from a petting zoo and has now been found, so Blanche can spend many more Caturdays with her visitors source: local21news.com \| share:	7
	How many are you a victim of? How many do you perpetuate? How many would hire you as doorman/woman? source: twitter.com \| share:	217
(Some Guy)	Trying to sell NFT's of a competing company's trademarked goods? That's a lawsuit source: voguebusiness.com \| share:	50

Fri February 04, 2022
	While NBC re-airs the propaganda fest that was the Opening Ceremony, live competition from Day 1 of the Winter Olympics starts at 8pm ET with curling. Later, gold medals are up for grabs in speed skating, cross country skiing, and more source: nbcolympics.com \| share:	664
	Australia wants your asses, and we're willing to pay handsomely for them source: abc.net.au \| share:	41

Thu February 03, 2022
	"Once someone has had the good fortune to share a true love affair with a Golden Retriever, one's life and one's outlook is never quite the same" - Betty White. Happy National Golden Retriever Day source: ibtimes.com \| share:	6
	Yo, I heard your bird wants to flip the bird so I made chicken fingers - and arms source: sadanduseless.com \| share:	1
	Woman finds a secret safe under carpet, calls guy to open it. Nothing found inside. That's it. That's the story source: mirror.co.uk \| share:	50
	Next up: Genetically modified people that taste like bacon source: euronews.com \| share:	8

Wed February 02, 2022
		Noticing that their dog, Scabigail's snoring was worsening, Alton Brown & his wife did an online body assessment & discovered their pup was too curvy. After getting advice on pet nutrition, she's on her way to a healthier Woofday Wetnose Wednesday source: people.com \| share:	251

Tue February 01, 2022
	Fox won't mess with ratings success, renews Hell's Kitchen for two more seasons, S21 and S22. As long as Gordon Ramsay doesn't need a walker or an ear trumpet, he'll be on your TV source: deadline.com \| share:	8
	Maru goes to town on some delivery cat grass, accidentally soils his owner's white carpet source: youtube.com \| share:	0
	Baskin Robbins has announced new rose ice cream for Valentines Day. Oh for Pete's sake source: finance.yahoo.com \| share:	20
	Newsflash: Plucky US Olympian Mariah Bell is set to be the oldest woman to compete in the figure skating competition in 94 years. Why, our geriatric gal is pushing almost a quarter-century if you can believe it. Break a leg, but not a hip, granny source: usatoday.com \| share:	16

Mon January 31, 2022
(Some Guy)	Hosting a Superb Owl party and will be serving chili and assorted appetizers. What will you be feeding the hordes? LGT one of the things I'm making source: mybakingaddiction.com \| share:	74
	Man, the Clifford The Big Red Dog movie looks really low-budget (possible nsfw content on page) source: dailystar.co.uk \| share:	3
	Man, the Clifford The Big Red Dog movie looks really low-budget (possible nsfw content on page) source: dailystar.co.uk \| share:	3

Sun January 30, 2022
	Photoshop this responsible, yet fashionable, pet source: gannett-cdn.com \| share:	14
	Politicians, Nazis, old French dudes, and the latest in the Burger Wars are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, Jan. 20-26: Brush Fire Edition source: fark.com \| share:	30

Sat January 29, 2022
		One of the greatest tragedies of 2020 was that Gary Busey: Pet Judge didn't get picked up for a second season source: youtube.com \| share:	23

Fri January 28, 2022
	"Private jet for your pet" may sound glamorous, but for some Hong Kong animal owners, it's just the cost of trying to leave source: cnn.com \| share:	9
	"Private jet for your pet" may sound glamorous, but for some Hong Kong animal owners, it's just the cost of trying to leave source: cnn.com \| share:	9
	Nearly half of all pet cats in Britain are obese - and it is estimated that a whopping 54,500 of them are suffering from diabetes. Let's not even start on their dental issues source: dailymail.co.uk \| share:	27
	Americans are shiatty drivers, and Pete Buttigieg is sick and tired of it source: slate.com \| share:	172

Thu January 27, 2022
		I'm gonna make a quick run to Lowe's to pick up some drywall, a golden retriever, and a new belt sander. Wait, go back one source: usatoday.com \| share:	10

Wed January 26, 2022
	Was Joe Biden correct when he called Peter Doocy a stupid son of a biatch? Slate asks the questions source: slate.com \| share:	97
	Russia threatens retaliation? Whaddaya gonna do Russia, help get a compromised puppet elected President? Oh, right source: ktla.com \| share:	54
	After Aspen was transferred to the Austin Humane Society, they noticed she wasn't interacting with potential adopters and realized she was deaf. They taught her commands through hand signals, and now she's been adopted in time for Woofday Wetnose Wednesday source: people.com \| share:	265

Tue January 25, 2022
		Maybe Peter Doocey really is the common denominator here source: twitter.com \| share:	82

Mon January 24, 2022
	The live-action Snow White is making Peter Dinklage a little grumpy source: yahoo.com \| share:	99
	Dept of Fish and Wildlife: Don't pet the danger kitty and please leave the danger kitty outside. Murica: I do what I want source: twitter.com \| share:	29
	What do you do when your pet pufferfish has teeth so big she can't eat? Take her to the fish dentist of course (possible nsfw content on page) source: thesun.co.uk \| share:	6

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