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headlines found matching 'Noun'
Sun January 23, 2022
(CNN)
 
 
 
Dutch airline announces new ultra-economy fare
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Thu January 20, 2022
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Americans announce that they simply cannot feel financially healthy without earning at least $122,000 per year. Also, I'm tired of driving on roads that aren't made of licorice. Someone fix that; I get hungry on long drives
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
NBC's Olympic announcers are not going to Beijing
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue January 18, 2022
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Local politician hated on both sides of the aisle announces he will not be seeking higher office
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
D.C. Metro General Manager Paul Wiedefeld announces plans to retire in 6 months on news that there's really nothing left in the system for him to break
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri January 14, 2022
(Democratic Underground)
 
 
 
Penzey's founder sent out an IDGAF email announcing a great sale for "Republicans are Racists Weekend." This is 100% real as subby got the email, but is already ruffling the feathers of the right wing
source: democraticunderground.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu January 13, 2022
(Colorado Sun)
 
 
 
What better place to announce your re-election bid than the steps of the courthouse where a grand jury is about to indict you?
source: coloradosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Scientists announce discovery of Unobtanium
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed January 12, 2022
(Heavy)
 
 
 
Raiders announce they are straight outta Compton despite the move to Las Vegas
source: heavy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue January 11, 2022
(The Hill)
 
 
 
DOJ announces formation of the new "Something Gonna Happen" unit
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon January 10, 2022
(CNN)
 
 
 
Oh, nothing, just a federal judge asking questions. "You have an almost 2-hour window where the President does not say, Stop, get out of the Capitol. This is not what I wanted you to do. [Why didn't] the President denounce the conduct immediately?"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Pfizer CEO announces that their new Omicron vaccine will be ready in March, just in time for the next variant that won't be affected by it
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
NASCAR Cup driver Aric Almirola announces his Fan Appreciation Tour
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun January 09, 2022
(Medpage Today)
 
 
 
CDC announces injection that can prevent many instances of pediatric diabetes
source: medpagetoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat January 08, 2022
(MSN)
 
 
 
Another crooked GOP politician conspiring against the State? Say it ain't so. Because we all know your average Republican denounces nepotism
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Fri January 07, 2022
(Nerdist)
 
 
 
Just me and the boys, announcing the season 3 release date of The Boys
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Thu January 06, 2022
(Twitter)
 
 
 
SNL announces the first host and musical guest of the year. You're too cool to know who they are
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Awful Announcing)
 
 
 
Not news: Fan Googling whether two players with the same name are related. News: Screwing up that fact as an announcer. Fark: Saying player "pulled that trigger" like his Dad, who served time in jail for a shooting, and died by gunfire later
source: awfulannouncing.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Scientists announce that they will be sailing to the "place in the world that's the hardest to get to" in order to study our melting Doomsday Glacier. And guess what ship they're sailing to get there
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Kazakhstan police -- very nice -- announce that "dozens of attackers were liquidated" as they attempted to storm government buildings. Unclear yet if this means they were liquified with some sort of energy weapon or sold at rock-bottom prices
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Wed January 05, 2022
(Russian Machine Never Breaks)
 
 
 
Everything should be announced the way Wes McCauley announces fighting penalties
source: russianmachineneverbreaks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Wal-Mart announces plans to significantly expand its "direct to fridge" in-home delivery service on news that even 99.6 percent of poor people own refrigerators
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The Supreme Court takes a quick break from its busy schedule of stripping away women's rights, voting rights, property rights, and 1st Amendment protections to announce that all nine justices have received a booster shot. Yay
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Tue January 04, 2022
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
Washington Football Team will announce new team name Feb. 2, with two names officially out of running - the Swamp Guineas and the Krauts
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Mon January 03, 2022
(NFL)
 
 
 
NFL announces schedule for Week 18 Saturday games, Sunday night flex with San Diego at Oakland
source: nfl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Rand Paul announces his exit from A) the Senate B) a taxi while attired in a mini skirt and no underpants C) YouTube D) the Earth
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(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Rafael Nadal announces that he is happy to lose to some 18-yo nobody at the Australian Open to take the heat off Novak Djokovic skipping out because of his belief in sky wizards and internet scienticians (possible nsfw content on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Comedian Joe Gatto announces that he is leaving the show "Impractical Jokers" on news that neither one of them is funny
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 31, 2021
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Times Square New Year's Eve celebration will go on despite record numbers of COVID-19 infections in the city. Mayor Bill de Blasio announces "we've got a message to the world. New York City is open" forgets to add "to fuel the pandemic"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 30, 2021
(Twitter)
 
 
 
NFL announces the 15 finalists for the 2022 Hall of Fame. Really- a kick returner?
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
D.C. Metro announces that it will not be allowing any of its series-7000 cars back into service on news that, holy shiat, those things'll kill you
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 28, 2021
(Fox 21 Duluth)
 
 
 
Letter from Copenhagen announcing grandson's birth at Danish hospital finally arrives to its intended Duluth, MN address 68 years late. And Subby thought Italian Post was slow
source: fox21online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 23, 2021
(NPR)
 
 
 
The Supreme Court announces that it will hold a special session to decide on the best way to gut Biden's vaccine mandate before it returns to its ongoing business of turning the United States into a patriarchal theocracy
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Wed December 22, 2021
(Tech Crunch)
 
 
 
Not news: scammer steals $150K from NFT platform. Fark: before it even opens by spoofing the Discord announcement bot and posting a fraudulent link
source: techcrunch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
TSA announces that passengers who disrupt flights and threaten airline attendants over mask mandates could lose their PreCheck privileges. Yeah, that'll show 'em
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 21, 2021
(US Food and Drug Administration)
 
 
 
FDA: Fresh Express announces Fresh Salad recall due possibly having decidedly unfresh Listeria lurking about
source: fda.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Lots of people: Cancel student loan debt. Department of Education: We have listened to you, and we have heard you, and that is why we're extremely happy to announce delaying restarting monthly repayments
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(C-SPAN)
 
 
 
On the first day of what could be a long winter, President Biden announces steps to handle a sharp increase in COVID-19 cases with the arrival of the Omicron variant (live 2:30 PM ET)
source: c-span.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon December 20, 2021
(CNN)
 
 
 
GOP announces that it will not allow Biden to add any liberals to the Supreme Court if Breyer decides to retire
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 17, 2021
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
It's 2021, and people still don't know how to pronounce Chipotle. That and other mispronounced words
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Thu December 16, 2021
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Manchin announced opposition to 1 year extension of child tax credit...... because he wants a full 10 years
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(The Hill)
 
 
 
Melania Trump announces new line of NFTs, and the first one might turn you to stone
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Japan's PM has a peek at his calendar, announces he has a 'can't miss' zoom call during the Beijing Winter Olympics opening ceremony and won't be able to make it. Unless his schedule changes. Maybe. We'll see
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed December 15, 2021
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Somebody have mercy on Mets announcers
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Japan Pro-Wrestling)
 
 
 
Will Hiromu blow up YOH's "Direct Drive" to Wrestle Kingdom? Can Chaos stop EVIL's heinous Final plans? What is Katsuyori Shibata's announcement? WORLD TAG LEAGUE 2021/BEST OF THE SUPER Jr. 28: FINAL starts @ 4:30 AM ET on NJPWWorld.com
source: njpw1972.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 14, 2021
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Big Papi announces split with Tiffany, moves in with Debbie Gibson
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Having learned nothing from Cowboy Bebop, Netflix announces its next headlong rush face first into the Boondoggle Brick Wall
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon December 13, 2021
(Variety)
 
 
 
Hollywood Foreign Press Association announces 2022 Golden Globe nominees, introduces their new Black friend
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(AP News)
 
 
 
Satellite images suggest Iranian space launch coming, not to mention all their media announcements
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 09, 2021
(Twitter)
 
 
 
It seems like a typical wedding announcement until you get to the 3rd paragraph
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
City announces plans for America's first large-scale autonomous-vehicle urban transit system, aiming for fleet of 100 vehicles. Just in case you want to cruise autonomously around Trenton, New Jersey in the future
source: trentondaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed December 08, 2021
(War is Boring)
 
 
 
Reagan announces arms buildup. This is not a repeat from 1982
source: warisboring.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 07, 2021
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer announces plans to force socialist payouts onto every car-owning citizen in the state. Resist, MAGA patriots. Don't let the radical Democrats tempt you with their siren-like lures. SAY NO THANKS TO SOCIALIST DOLLARS!
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon December 06, 2021
(Independent)
 
 
 
Rep. Devin Nunes (R-ussia) announces retirement, plans to spend more time with his herd [Update: he was just named CEO of Trump's new media venture]
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
I'll be looking forward to the follow-up video in which the lady tearfully announces that both of her cats have gone missing and that she's offering a reward for their recovery
source: majesticanimals.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Duran Duran announce announce summer summer tour tour
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat December 04, 2021
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Let Star Trek teach you how to pronounce "Omicron Persei 8"
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 03, 2021
(NPR)
 
 
 
Prosecutor announces that parents of the psycho terrorist who shot up that Michigan high school are being charged with four counts of involuntary manslaughter. "Gun ownership is a right. And with that right comes great responsibility"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
"I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Aristocrats"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 02, 2021
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Senate announces new Pope
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Wed December 01, 2021
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Stacy Abrams announces she's about to take on the devil down in Georgia
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Capital One says it is ditching all consumer overdraft fees, giving up $150 million in annual revenues. In an unrelated story, it has announced it's heavy into unicorn fart futures, renewable vegan pixie dust, and the Brooklyn Bridge swaps market
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue November 30, 2021
(Thrillist)
 
 
 
Subway announces two new sandwiches, along with a new six-inch deal that will satisfy everyone including your mom
source: thrillist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Congress wants to kill the "backdoor Roth IRA," which does not mean the same thing that subby yelled at HR on his last day of work when the company announced it was cutting matching contributions
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Fri November 26, 2021
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Merck announces its anti-COVID pill molnupiravir is less worthy than originally reported, but hopes to acquire something equivalent from Beta Ray Bill in an alternate timeline
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed November 24, 2021
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
New bong-cleaning service announced. "There is a supply for every demand." -Florence Scovel Shinn
source: richmondbizsense.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Collins Dictionary announces its word of the year, and it's even dumber than you thought it would be
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Grammy Awards refuse to denounce the kid from The Wonder Years
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue November 23, 2021
(Engadget)
 
 
 
Dodge announced that their upcoming EV line won't be compatible with any Chargers at all
source: engadget.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service announces plans to protect freshwater map turtles, which have become threatened due to people's refusal to fold them correctly
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
Facing the possibility of a more strenuous 2022, Ukraine announces new, tank-heavy diet for its soldiers
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri November 19, 2021
(The Big Lead)
 
 
 
Looks like we can add *spins wheel* former New York Met and current Mets announcer Keith Hernandez to the moron pool as he comes out as an anti-vaxxer
source: thebiglead.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu November 18, 2021
(MSN)
 
 
 
"Quebec premier set to announce plan to increase number of Quebec-born NHL players" What a dumb ide... (looks at the Habs' record) ... ya know, he might have something here
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 7 Austin)
 
 
 
Beto O'Rourke raised $2 million in 24 hours since announcing he was running for governor of Texas. Abbott meanwhile, has $55 million under the couch cushions, and can fleece the rubes for money anytime he needs it
source: fox7austin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed November 17, 2021
(Variety)
 
 
 
Reno Sheriff's Department announces The Hunt for Q
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Baker Mayfield announces he is 100% ready to end his career early by continuing to play with multiple injuries. Johnny Manziel waiting by the phone
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Variety)
 
 
 
Jane Campion announces she hates superhero films, dashing the hopes of everyone holding out for a Harvey Keitel Dr. Manhattan
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Apple announces it will soon let customers repair their own iPhones without bricking them or voiding the warranty. All you'll need is a proprietary Philippes screwdriver ($199) and a special carbon-fiber iSpudger ($599-currently out of stock)
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IGN)
 
 
 
The 2021 Game Awards are announced. Smart money is on Psychonauts 2
source: ign.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue November 16, 2021
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Starz makes a smooth decision and announces a new season of Party Down with Rob Thomas
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Wow, "Christian Media Company", "Luciferian stranglehold", "Florida". This announcement is a neutron star of crazy
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon November 15, 2021
(AP News)
 
 
 
Gadhafi's son announces candidacy for president of Libya. I'm sure that will work out just fine. After all, he's just as in tents
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Sen. Patrick Leahy (D-one) announces he won't seek re-election
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
L'Oreal announces it will remove all the racist words, such as "whitening," from its skincare products. Of course, it's still making the products, so let's guess what they're going to be called instead
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun November 14, 2021
(Salon)
 
 
 
Does anyone ever mispronounce your name?
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri November 12, 2021
(The Hill)
 
 
 
The Senator with the difficult to spell last name that won a write-in election in the most rural state in America announces bid for re-election. Abandon all hope ye who enter this race against her
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu November 11, 2021
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Aiming to stick it to the libs, GOP megadonor announces plans to fundraise for Democrat Joe Manchin
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed November 10, 2021
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Nicole Kidman announces "Lucy, I'm home"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical Xpress)
 
 
 
In other news, the Tooth Fairy's union has just announced it will pay for all members to get their Ph.Ds and become licensed therapists between pillow gigs
source: medicalxpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue November 09, 2021
(Congressional Budget Office)
 
 
 
Who's killing the Build Back Better bill now? *spins wheel* The CBO just announced that they won't have estimates this week, probably not next week...listen, they'll get around to it on their own time
source: cbo.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon November 08, 2021
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Governor DeathSentence, state GOP leadership announce new legislative agenda to outlaw federal COVID-19 vaccine mandates, secede from OSHA. This is not a repeat from 1861
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
AG Garland, FBI director Wray, and deputy secretary of the Treasury will be making a major law enforcement announcement today. Betting lines say it's about a global ransomware takedown
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu November 04, 2021
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
To prevent another January 6th, the Biden admin announces deadline of January 4th for 5G injections. This obviously gives 2 days for the sedatives to kick in
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Watch the announcement of a major discovery about a fossil human relative at 8:15 AM ET. The presentation is titled "A Child of Darkness." You can watch on YouTube, Instagram, or Facebook. In unrelated news: Evolution? The fossils say fark yeah
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue November 02, 2021
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Newsmax announces plan to cover the news with Santorum
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
After dominating the hybrid market, Toyota announces first all-electric mass-produced car, decides to name it after one of Data's long-lost brothers
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon November 01, 2021
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Arizona Senate president and fraudit backer announces retirement suddenly. Huh, wonder what's coming
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Sega and Microsoft announce strategic alliance, tentatively calling it "The 90s"
source: gematsu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Kal Penn announces his engagement. You best get him the wafflebot that is on his registry
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun October 31, 2021
(MPR News)
 
 
 
Scientists announce that possible alien signal came from an alcohol-based civilization living in a hostile environment of deadly creatures
source: mprnews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri October 29, 2021
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
America's greatest rock band announces huge Hyde Park show in 2022
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu October 28, 2021
(CBS News)
 
 
 
NYC public schools announce that "red light, green light" won't end with blam blam as students will be prevented from playing the Squid Games for Halloween
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed October 27, 2021
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
On the day the British finance minister announces the new budget, the 'sick man of Europe' cuts expected GDP growth this year because of Covid and global supply chain issues
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue October 26, 2021
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
It's pronounced "dumb-ass"
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Amazon expected to announce the closing of their Staten Island fulfillment center any day now
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon October 25, 2021
(Frank Gehry)
 
 
 
Paris Hilton's wedding registry, including $1,845 caviar-vodak set and $4,885 vase, which is presumably pronounced "vahz"
source: gearys.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Bezos announces plans for private space station; search for more kryptonite
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri October 22, 2021
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
How do you do, fellow netizens?
source: lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBA)
 
 
 
To celebrate its 75th anniversary, the NBA announces the top 76(?) players of all time
source: ca.nba.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Biden announces at Town Hall in Baltimore that he now supports killing the filibuster
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed October 20, 2021
(Twitter)
 
 
 
NBA announces list of 75 greatest players for its 75th anniversary season. Posts the names of the first 25, not all turrible. For debate and giggles, post some who should occupy the remaining 50 spots on the list
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue October 19, 2021
(IFL Science)
 
 
 
Sequel to Big Bang Theory Announced
source: iflscience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Walmart announces 2021 Black Friday plans: if you can find it on the shelf you can buy it
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon October 18, 2021
(Salon)
 
 
 
Here are eleven words you're likely mispronouncing
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat October 16, 2021
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Small city proud to announce that it was ranked the 22nd best place to live in what appears to have been a survey of people who already live there. Woot
source: framinghamsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed October 13, 2021
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Wildlife Photographer of the Year winners announced. Prepare yourself for stunning natural beauty and OH GOD KILL #7 WITH FIRE
source: scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Netflix announces that nobody will be left out as the entire original cast will be in the live action Cowboy Bebop
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
FDA announces that it sees no reason to doubt data helpfully provided by R.J. Reynolds that "proves" e-cigarettes can actually help people quit smoking. Up next: Conclusive studies from Exxon Mobile that oil in ocean water improves seabirds' plumage
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Defense One)
 
 
 
Countering decades of evidence otherwise, Archbishop announces that young Catholic men don't have to do anything they're not comfortable with
source: defenseone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(APM Marketplace)
 
 
 
Wendy's and Google announce alliance to bring AI into the Franchise Wars. Taco Bell and Cyberdyne Systems reportedly close to a deal
source: marketplace.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
NFL announces that it won't publicly release any of the hundreds of thousands of emails it obtained in its investigation of the Washington Football Team on news that this would lead to a lot of other people besides Jon Gruden having to resign
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Snooker legend Ronnie O'Sullivan announces this week's open tournament is boring, the atmosphere is dead, and that his first-round goal was to complete the match before dying of boredom. Fan-tastic
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue October 12, 2021
(WTRF Wheeling)
 
 
 
West Virginia announces winners in its "Do it for Babydog" vaccine sweepstakes, appropriately named after a dog with chronic breathing problems
source: wtrf.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon October 11, 2021
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
The most-wanted toy this Christmas hasn't been announced, but you won't get it in time
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri October 08, 2021
(CNN)
 
 
 
Oklahoma woman announces retirement from politics
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Nobel Peace Prize to be renamed Nobel Fark You Prize after latest awards announced
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu October 07, 2021
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Remember when the government went after scammy for-profit colleges? Back before we had a president who ran one, and secretary of Education who invested in them? The FTC has just announced that we are back in that business again in a BIG way
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed October 06, 2021
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Budweiser announces the birth of a new Clydesdale foal. Expect to wean it onto solid food in about 5 months, starting with spaghetti
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue October 05, 2021
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
With a battle cry go forth which is "Give the people what they want", Nintendo announces the final Super Smash Bros. Ultimate Fighter
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Late Show with David Letterman" announcer Alan Kalter dead at age 78
source: consequence.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon October 04, 2021
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
LaMar's Donuts announce 20% price hike after employee walkout, will now give $25 giftcards to barristas who show up for job interviews
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu September 30, 2021
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Smith and Wesson headquarters moving to TN, announced the same day a 13-year-old is shot in a Memphis school. Because you can't go Walking in Memphis without your Pumped up Kicks
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PopCulture)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Celebrity death hoaxes. New hotness: False announcements of sitcom reboots
source: popculture.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed September 29, 2021
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Pac-Man announces that he's eaten his last ghost. Or, more appropriately considering his last outings, that he's been eaten by his last ghost, but whatevs. On the plus side, he's likely going to be "President Pac Man" to you in the near future
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Comic Book)
 
 
 
New Cyberpunk RPG announced. Working title is Cyberpunk: AARP
source: comicbook.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shaq Fu)
 
 
 
Shaquille O'Neal announces his retirement from being a celebrity. I don't think that is how it works
source: lakersdaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LGBTQ Nation)
 
 
 
The View announces new guest-host following Meghan McCain's depature and it is...are you farking KIDDING me?
source: lgbtqnation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue September 28, 2021
(NPR)
 
 
 
Another year, another time where you were not announced as a winner of a MacArthur Genius Grant
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Gov Abbottoir announces the new ERCOT board, staffed by well-respected energy industry scientists, engineers, and infrastructure experts laser-focused on........oh fark it, who am I kidding? They're all industry shills who won't change a thing
source: communityimpact.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
Weeners
 
Michelin Announces 2021 Stars For California restaurants. Weeners tag because I'm hungry
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KUCI)
 
 
 
Today's 2-hour serving of '80s alt/post-punk/new wave is being preempted by MAJOR SHOW ANNOUNCEMENT. And dancing. You have been warned. Hear what commercial radio doesn't sound like on pastFORWARD #259. Starts @ 1:00 PM ET, LGT streaming options
source: kuci.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Explore)
 
 
 
The Fat Bear Week contestants have been announced. Don't forget to fill out your bracket and vote
source: explore.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon September 27, 2021
(Politico)
 
 
 
Controverisal facial recognition software vendor Clearview AI announces it has dropped its subpoenas against open-government groups and researchers who have been critical of the company's technology, saying it'll have no trouble finding them later
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
SNL announces new cast: No Beck, no Lauren, first Muslim-American, a weirdo, and a good Trump impersonator at last
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Facebook announces two 'smart' displays for the home. Will it be nice or just plain stupid?
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
Moderate House dems announce they will support the reconciliation bill
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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