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headlines found matching 'News'
Tue June 15, 2021
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Former NYC police commissioner warns of 'murican summer
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Local reporter claims Fox News "muzzled" her (difficulty: her story will be told by Project Veritas)
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Alabama officially hits 30% of fully vaccinated individuals against COVID-19, thanks God again for Mississippi
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 14, 2021
(AOL)
 
 
 
Justice official resigns in wake of Democrat and media records seizure uproar, proving again why you don't mess with people's vinyl. It's got a warmer sound, man
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
New York to throw ticker tape parade to honor essential workers. Parade to honor sanitation workers who have to clean up all that crap still unscheduled
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Leave it to The Hill to "raise questions" about "the suicide" of news anchor who "broke" the Big Bill/ Loretta Lynch tarmac meet up of some 5 years ago, anyway, before Hillary "lost" to Donald Trump, hmmm,... gee I wonder if,... nah
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Mall REIT files for Chapter 11 hoping to reimagine itself filled with condos, walking trails, pop-up shops, ax throwing bars, and gaming arenas
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
India about to go laser eyes (possible nsfw content on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
This is important, you guys
source: hitc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouGov)
 
 
 
10,000 Americans were asked how many meals they could make without looking at a recipe. The answer is good news for the restaurant industry
source: today.yougov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NFL)
 
 
 
Eagles sign former 49ers QB. No, not that one. Not that one, either
source: nfl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
A look at how the top hospitals in the US guarantee their patients are profit centers first
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MovieWeb)
 
 
 
In news that might have been interesting in 1998, 'Kingpin 2' is apparently in the works
source: movieweb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
In great news for those who enjoy eating plastic: Vegan spider silk provides sustainable alternative to single-use plastics
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
First new news channel in twenty four years launched in UK. They report terrorist known as V still at large but, as always, England prevails
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 13, 2021
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Netanyahu uses his last speech as prime minister to soberly reflect on his years in office, his missteps with the Palestinians, and a hope his successor can achieve a lasting peace. Just kidding, he attacked Biden for not going to war with Iran
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patheos)
 
 
 
Newsmax: Invoking the name of any god, except for the Christian god, when reciting the Pledge of Allegiance, is illegal
source: friendlyatheist.patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Facepalm. Just facepalm (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
The worst thing about security cameras in McDonald's is they're watching you eat AND steal from kids with cancer
source: fox13news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Why has local news collapsed? For one, 2 pages of news and 21 pages of ads
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
"F*ck Cancer" futures rise on news that new cutting-edge test has been developed that detects early tumor recurrence in some cancers
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 12, 2021
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Tonight the SRX debuts with their first race at a sold out Stafford Motor Speedway. Will you be entertained? Will Helio climb the fence if he wins? Will Tony Stewart and Paul Tracy fit in their cars? Coverage begins at 8pm ET on CBS
source: srxracing.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATC Acadiana)
 
 
 
Witnesses say that after a triple shooting in a parking lot the place was swarming with cops....which makes sense, since it was the police headquarters parking lot
source: katc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 11, 2021
(Axios)
 
 
 
At last, bipartisanship. But don't be surprised if it's labeled as misinformation, and gets disappeared from the internet
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Today would have been ocean explorer Jacques Cousteau's birthday. While at sea he helped NASA. He also did a panel for NASA on its Viking mission to Mars. In unrelated news, if you don't know who he was then get off Subby's lawn
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Will the Hawks take Game 3 on their home court? Or will Philly take the series lead? Can the Suns go up 3-0 on those darn Nuggets? The NBA Playoffs continue with tip-offs at 7:30 and 10:00 PM ET on ESPN
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed News)
 
 
 
Chose your favorite of these 10 websites and we'll tell you which news organization just received its first Pulitzer prize
source: buzzfeednews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
News reporter is interviewing local Durham residents about gun violence, only to be interrupted by gun violence
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Rupert Murdoch writes down the value of his News Group Newspapers to zero. The Sun is there
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
So what I get out of this is that Fox News host Tammy Bruce finds horses sexy
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
We're getting a Bernie Mac biopic courtesy of John Legend
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 10, 2021
(TaxProf)
 
 
 
College enrollment plummets by 727,000. In related news, beer sales are down 186,000,000 barrels
source: taxprof.typepad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AlterNet)
 
 
 
After years spent whipping its viewers into a lunatic frenzy that culminated in the Jan. 6 insurrection, Fox News staffers were "distraught" when the network downplayed the Jan. 6 insurrection
source: alternet.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
UK: We've got Covid under control. Nature: Surprise Monkey Pox. In other news, Surprise Monkey Pox is the name of my OMD tribute band
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Jim Acosta is correct: We ignore greenlights of Trump threads at our own peril
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Times)
 
 
 
Florida Man uses podcast to interview guy who ate his own foot. Asks, "what was that like?"
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(It's All Marvel)
 
 
 
Bruce Campbell should play Mephisto in Doctor Strange 2
source: itsallmarvel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Luxembourg: Amazon, we're gonna hit you with the largest-ever fine for breaking EU privacy laws. Amazon: Oh, OK. We just made that much in the time you took a breath *farts*
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Google and Facebook pledged $millions for local news operations- for three years. Then what? Let's listen in
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Fine, so you want to cruise unvaccinated? Okay. Here's the bill for each of the daily tests we're going to administer so you can wander amongst the vaccinated masses
source: royalcaribbeanblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
The top priority of Attorney General Merrick Garland: A) Investigate Trump's failed insurrection attempt, B) Crack down of the nationwide surge in white nationalism, or C) Find out who leaked the news that billionaires pay almost no taxes
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science News Magazine)
 
 
 
Physicists want to put a particle collider on the moon. No word on how the whalers will react
source: sciencenews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Anybody in these here parts ever use the car auction site Bring a Trailer?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBUR Boston)
 
 
 
Not news: Republican state rep makes homophobic comment, anger ensues. News: Anger is from fellow Republicans. Fark: 29 out of 30 elected Republicans demand her resignation for comments. Bonus: Also demand resignation of party chair who defended her
source: amp.wbur.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
 
 
In other news, inflation is high and hitting U.S. consumers pretty good
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Panhandle)
 
 
 
Pilot arrested for buzzing over, nosediving toward crowd at Gulf Coast Jam Saturday, all to advertise his flight school. Lucky cops didn't shoot him down
source: mypanhandle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 09, 2021
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Carb-free since 2014. Crab-free since this morning
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pro Football Talk)
 
 
 
Its not news, it's just a billionaire demanding handouts for a stadium
source: profootballtalk.nbcsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
"A book is a loaded gun in the house next door...Who knows who might be the target of the well-read man?" ―Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451. This is your Fark Writer's Thread, Pleasure to Burn Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Slow news day at Page Six, eh?
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Kevin Nealon upset that a burglar broke in and stole a necklace containing some of Garry Shandling's ashes. In other news, Kevin Nealon had a necklace containing some of Garry Shandling's ashes
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Pint retires just as he's old enough to have one
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
Active shooter at Lackland Air Force Base, Texas. Situation evolving. UPDATE: Lockdown lifted, investigation underway
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland 19)
 
 
 
When your name is Brownson and you're hired by the Browns, you're expected to do Browns things
source: cleveland19.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"Are you saying OAN is not a credible news source?" Yes. I am saying exactly that
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
She is running for city council in NYC but none of the newspapers in her home district will even publish her picture. Why? Because she's a SHE of course, and Orthodox Newspapers refuse to run any image of a woman
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Mormon sex therapist's ouster stirs worries of shame culture. In other news, there are Mormon sex therapists
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Stay with me on this one: A Fox News contributor said the Bidens are the "klan family" and Joe is the "imperial wizard" and we've gone to plaid
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Study shows people who have already been infected with COVID-19 gain no additional benefits from vaccination
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Hybrid Babies Born Across US screams the front page of Weekly World News, er, USA Today
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Florida Woman, Disneyland, snack foods, and kids books are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 23-29: Homemade Ice Cream Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
New York Times tries to cover up the fact that watermelons were found on Mars
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
Delta decided its HQ should be in Chicago
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Apple, Android, Windows sittin' in a tree F-A-C-E-T-I-M-I-N-G
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 08, 2021
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
Today on Geraldo: When Fox News says the quiet part out loud about Vice President Kamala Harris
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Literary Hub)
 
 
 
"No one will ever be able to say, with absolute certainty, how many Fox News devotees died from the virus. But it is obvious that Fox's fingerprints were all over the government's response"
source: lithub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Southwest orders 100 more 737 Max jets amid news that people are no longer collectively afraid of Covid and need something to take its place
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Onion)
 
 
 
Kyrsten Sinema proudly defends Senate tradition of keeping Kyrsten Sinema's name in the news cycle
source: theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Gaetz: I was about to sign on with Newsmax. Newsmax: new phone who dis?
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"'We turned so far right we went crazy:' How Fox News was radicalized by its own viewers"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 35 Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida woman who saw 'baby dinosaur' running through yard says this is what it was
source: fox35orlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man finds 2-carat diamond worth £40k while mining for materials for engagement ring. In other news, someone went mining for materials for an engagement ring
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Prankster blows thousands during 13-hour bender after telling pals he won £328K lotto jackpot. Jokes on him though, free booze is free booze no matter how funny one thinks they are
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
Fox News claims Democrats are pushing anti-white Jim Crow laws
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(France 24)
 
 
 
Not news: Observe and report. News: Incise and amputate
source: france24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 07, 2021
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Stormy Daniels says she's offered to cooperate with prosecutors. Following that, she plans to get an expert in to fix the cable
source: au.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
LA mayoral candidate running on public safety gets live demonstration at news conference
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Four members of a Muslim family killed in a premeditated attack in Ontario, Canada, with only a 9-year-old surviving the attack
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Hate to put the drowning trifecta into play here, but when you are in your 20s, don't go chasing waterfalls and end up a PSA
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
The real news here is the Vatican has a space observatory
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Investment Tip of the Day: Should you invest in meme stocks? M m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m m No
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science News Magazine)
 
 
 
Staghorn ferns may be the first plants known to share, the news of which they wanted to share, obviously
source: sciencenews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Even Fox News hosts are telling Joe Manchin he's an idiot
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Why is Jen Psaki so good at dealing with Fox News? Easy: as a State Department spokesperson, she regularly faced down bad-faith questions from Russian and Chinese propagandists
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
If 70+ academic papers saying masks work didnt convince you, maybe a poll based on self-reported behavior will
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Good news on the pandemic front, it probably drove some strains of the flu extinct
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Professor of Constitutional Democracy is SHOCKED by distorted American history on the cover of a book. Weird, because his deconstruction is literally what it is like to watch every night of US tv news, as a non-USer. Read to see what we see every day
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Not News: Man creates anti-fog device for mask/glasses. News: Jerk did not call it Opti-Grab 2.0
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 06, 2021
(MSN)
 
 
 
I'm beginning to think that these Fox News guys may not be fair and balanced after all
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Variety)
 
 
 
Queen Elizabeth II has another great-granddaughter, spawned by he who shall not be named
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Fox News's refusal to air Trump's speech shows his waning power
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Wait, that actually happened? Tell your surreal stories. Difficulty: Nothing from the news
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 05, 2021
(Twitter)
 
 
 
News: Jon Rahm leads the Memorial Tournament after three rounds by six strokes. Fark: Tests positive for Covid-19. WTFark: Forced to withdraw from the tournament in what may be the most socially distant sport known to man
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
News: New obesity drug heralded as game changer. 'Murica: "The field is still at the mercy of our insurance companies for coverage and reimbursement. Without these, the drug can be wonderful, but it may never be utilized to its potential,"
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
The world needs a chief risk officer
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Jen Psaki gets an Annie Liebowitz photo shoot. Kayleigh MacEnany: waaaaah, what about me?
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
God help us all; Trey Gowdy has a Fox News platform
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Crews rescue child who came tumbling down wooded hillside. No word on condition of Jack, pail of water
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 04, 2021
(Stars and Stripes)
 
 
 
The US Navy will christen a new, $360m Independence class LCS on Saturday. In unrelated news, the US Navy is decommissioning two Independence class LCS to cut costs
source: stripes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSLS Virginia)
 
 
 
Jerry Falwell, Jr. says that Liberty University's lawsuit is just an excuse to shame him, and that he's kinda into it
source: wsls.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(We Are Central PA)
 
 
 
Jared Bell of 'Drake and Josh' charged with crimes against a child. Agreed, the show is pretty bad, but really?
source: wearecentralpa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
01/07/2023: It Returns
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Not news: Road trip to the beach. Still not news: With your four-year-old sister. News: You have an accident ten miles into your road trip. Fark: You're nine years old
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
FBI Director Wray compares cyberattacks to 9/11
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politicus USA)
 
 
 
Bob Costas calls for Conservatives to oust the MAGA fringe and be strong and sane again
source: politicususa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Mob attacks Police Officers and Faux News is suddenly concerned
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KERO 23 Bakersfield)
 
 
 
Gavin Newsom devises brilliant plan to ensure the California Fark demographic votes for him in the upcoming recall election
source: turnto23.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Polite Canadians currently recycle only 9% of their plastic waste. In Ontario, plastic producers will soon have to foot the entire recycling bill instead of splitting it with taxpayers. So, good news, right? Sorry, no
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 03, 2021
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
NIH director Collins has had enough of Fox News's bullshiat
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Much like that rash on your whosis, Fark Friday Movie Night is back
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Touring bands, classic movies, new technology, and of course Florida Man are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 23-29: Polish Spareribs Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Good News: College professor raises $200K to pay down children's school lunch debt. Bad News: Professor allegedly keeps $120K of the money. Fark: Professor teaches ethics at local college
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guitar World)
 
Video
 
In news that might have been mildly interesting in 1987, Yngwie Malmsteen releases new single
source: guitarworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bring Me the News)
 
 
 
It's turtles, loons, and muskrats all the way down
source: bringmethenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
In other news, it gets hotter as we move into the summer months
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Post US)
 
 
 
Only one in five Irish people admit to being on work Zoom calls in their underwear. In related news, apparently you're not supposed to do that
source: irishpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Civil Rights Movement)
 
 
 
Sinema travels with the enema
source: thenewcivilrightsmovement.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Not news: outfielder and infielder collide on pop fly. Still not news: neither player catches the ball. WTFark: one of the injured players throws it in for a 6-5-4, inning-ending double play
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Elon Musk says that aliens should invade Earth to wipe out humanity. This is good news for the Earth-Trisolaris Organization
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
Fox News calls Federal contracts to minority-owned businesses "reverse racism"
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 12 Westchester)
 
 
 
Dick puts up signs. Signs offend people. Mayor tells Dick to remove signs. Don't be a Dick
source: newjersey.news12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Above the Law)
 
 
 
I'M ERIC kindly confirms Trump family receives subpoenas by the truckload, sheds delicious tears while doing so
source: abovethelaw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 02, 2021
(NYPost)
 
 
 
News: Florida Man takes son on a "drive-by" with his paintball gun. Fark: Residents think it's a real drive-by and fire back with live rounds. Florida: Dad accidentally runs over son after the son is shot
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Fox News will be on HIGH ALERT. The Iranian high seas fleet will be off our East Coast any day now. The whole thing. Both ships
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
The only crypto currency that has ever mattered soars on official adoption news
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Miami)
 
 
 
Is there a Kidz Bop version of 'I fought the law'?
source: miami.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cageside Seats)
 
 
 
In one of the more nonsensical moves in recent memory unless there is news that hasn't hit yet, the WWE announces that Titan Towers will be flipped upside down
source: cagesideseats.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
AMC theaters, a company with negligible revenue and more debt than Venezuela, is now up 2,000% this year on it's way to being the most valuable company in the entire universe
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wtnh.com)
 
 
 
CT leads the nation in percentage of the population fully vaccinated, percentage of the population willing to shoot holes in the State Capitol building
source: wtnh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
CEO of Tyson Foods flies the coop after 8 months for "personal reasons," others say he was "chicken"
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Old man no longer blogs at clouds
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
Are baseless conspiracy theories ruining your social media experiences?
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
The Death Star is orbiting Mars and NASA somehow slipped up and missed censoring the photo of it that was taken by the Ingenuity helicopter. They are now scrambling to make up a better excuse than swamp gas reflecting the light from Venus
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
GOP strategy for Election 2022? A war over race, or a race war? You decide
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouGov)
 
 
 
A recent poll found nine in 10 people have experienced déjà vu before. In other news, a recent poll found nine in 10 people have experienced déjà vu before
source: today.yougov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Seattle's $700 million downtown waterfront park will be ruined by "wokeness," breathlessly explains Fox News
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
News anchor turned conspiracy theorist joins the race to make Arizona an even greater laughingstock
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 01, 2021
(EuroNews)
 
 
 
NATO restricts the access of Belarusian officials to NATO HQ in Brussels. In other unbelievable news Belarusian officials have had access to NATO HQ since 1998. Tag is for NATO allowing Putin access to its HQ
source: euronews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(8 News Now)
 
 
 
Las Vegas celebrates full reopening, a return to spreading all the other viruses it used to
source: 8newsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed News)
 
 
 
Buzzfeed News FOIA's 3,200 of Fauci's emails from last year. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll bang your head on something in frustration, you'll want to throw your computer out the window
source: buzzfeednews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sports Illustrated)
 
 
 
June 1st is here, and that means it is time to ramp up the Aaron Rodgers trade speculation. Where will he suit up this year (or will he at all)? Link goes to SI trade rumors
source: si.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Good news everyone: Because we've 100% eradicated Covid-19, people have stopped testing and we're all going back to normal. Wait, that might not be such great news everyone
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Texas Rapper L'il Loaded known for the hit single "6locc 6a6y" has died at age 20, oddly enough, not in a drive-by committed by a posse of outraged English teachers and grammarians
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Good news, at least it's not Chicago style. Pizza Hut is bringing back 'The Edge' pizza from 1997
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Republicans fear Trump hanging around and not going away will lead to a "lost generation" of talent. In related news: The Republican Party has people in it with talent?
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Yacht owner who got screwed trying to sell his boat to Matt Gaetz details all the monkey business that went on. "Thirsty"
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouGov)
 
 
 
A recent poll found nine in 10 people have experienced déjà vu before. In other news, a recent poll found nine in 10 people have experienced déjà vu before
source: today.yougov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
When will Pink Floyd release a new mix of "Animals?" When pigs fly. In other news, pigs have been spotted flying about the Battersea Power Station
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 31, 2021
(Guardian)
 
 
 
People who are most confident about their ability to spot fake news are the most likely to fall victim to misinformation and most of us are overconfident
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHON2 Honolulu)
 
 
 
Covid was the last nail in the coffin for 70 year handmade authentic Aloha shirt company
source: khon2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 30, 2021
(Jackson Hole News and Guide)
 
 
 
People that live in a van down by the river and a trucker who watched a bear from the air are fighting for their right to harass wildlife
source: jhnewsandguide.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
On top of COVID, Australia has also been dealing with a cannibal mouse epidemic. Because it is Australia, things are going to get worse as it soon will add snake plague to the list
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Illinois becomes first state to ban police lying during juvenile interrogations
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Illinois becomes first state to ban police lying during juvenile interrogations
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Regina King learns she's the frontrunner to direct the new Superman movie during MSNBC interview
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
I'm starting to think that Fox News isn't arguing in good faith
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
2 dead, over 20 people injured in a mass shooting in Miami. Suspects are still at large. Can we just do away with the clock completely now?
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 29, 2021
(Daily Gazette (Schenectady))
 
 
 
Sheep on the lam
source: dailygazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
NOT NEWS: Man spends 29 years in prison for murder. NEWS: Freed after it is revealed he is innocent. FARK: He couldn't be freed years earlier because appeals must be within 60 days of new evidence that the state held from him for 4 years
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Travels)
 
 
 
Trust me, there's lots to discuss here. Plus some rather odd photos
source: constative.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
This proves everything about UFOs is true. Wait... "filmmaker claims" ...okay, so at least it's in a legitimate newspaper. Wait... the NY Post ...oh well, back to watching "X-Files" reruns
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Not news: 11 year old boy steals toy car. News: 11 year old boy steals real car
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
TV reporter announces death of playwright William Shakespeare after death of the world's second Covid vaccine recipient
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Florida Inspector General grants Rebekah Jones whistleblower status. DeSantis cowering in his Fox News bunker ready to sign laws banning whistles and blowing
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 28, 2021
(CBC)
 
 
 
Wanna go see a live NHL hockey playoff game? Got a couple of grands to spare? Boy have I got some news for you
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Urine the jungle, baby
source: consequence.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bring Me the News)
 
 
 
Twins 3rd baseman Josh Donaldson to release video catalog of cheating pitchers. Next week news, Josh Donaldson's lifeless body found submerged in trashcan of liquid horse steroids
source: bringmethenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Bad news for those of you thinking about moving to Boise. Beyond the fact that you're thinking about moving to Boise, I mean
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
New Covid safety measures have bars in the UK worrying they'll sell 21,000,000 less pints of beer going forward
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politicus USA)
 
 
 
Pandemic unemployment hits a new low thanks to Biden's strong economic recovery
source: politicususa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
How about some good COVID news: Two new studies show that immunity might last years
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AlterNet)
 
 
 
Meet the former teacher who makes a career out of writing nazi propaganda
source: alternet.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
If, for you, the worst thing about the pandemic was that there were no more free samples at Costco, I've got some good news
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Otago Daily Times)
 
 
 
There's turning yourself in to the police and then there's renting a helicopter to pick you up from your mountain hideaway and feasting on champagne and oysters on your way to turning yourself in
source: odt.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Matt Gaetz tried to buy a 'yacht' had it repainted, then said the money was stolen once he'd wired it to the owner. Fark: Had already changed the name of the boat to 'Thirsty'
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Variety)
 
 
 
NBC scatters Debris to the wind
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Good news. Rolls Royce can now custom build you a special Rolls if you are not enthralled by the vehicles they offer to the hoi polloi
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Cicada News Network
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
White House tells former Trump appointees who lost their jobs when Biden took office: You seriously need to get over it complainers
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 27, 2021
(AP News)
 
 
 
Scientists are trying to shed light on Hawaii's ghost net problem. In related news, Hawaii is haunted by ghost nets
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Old and Busted: The Kardashians. And I literally mean that. New hotness...okay, well maybe not new, but close enough: the Thornes
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Tyee)
 
 
 
News: Americans warn Trudeau that his nuclear fuel plans will be a nuclear weapons threat. Fark: Trudeau's plans are to recycle spent CANDU reactor nuclear fuel for use in Moltex reactors, to dramatically reduce nuclear waste
source: thetyee.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitch.tv)
 
 
 
6:30 PM Eastern - it's the Fark News Livestream, Cicada Lab Escape Sex Doll Steinbeck Werewolves Edition
source: twitch.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
...And in other news, stocks are down sharply in early trading for makers of prosthetic thumbs
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
London's West End, 80s music, fast food, and social media influencers are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 9-15 Himalayan Salt Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jerusalem Post)
 
 
 
"Israel's operation against Hamas was the world's first AI war." In related news: AIs don't like the Associated Press and roads that lead to hospitals
source: jpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Not news: baserunner gets into a rundown. News: between home and first. Fark: allows time for a run to score. Ultra Fark: and then makes it to second
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Good news: woman gets a sperm donor who's a doctor. Bad news: the doctor who inseminated her
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(We Are Central PA)
 
 
 
Food tab is holding Business tab's hair while it throws up in the Sheetz bathroom at the thought of the new strawberry and banana milkshake beer. Ought to be a PSA to stay away, but Business is not looking too good. Food says let News take it
source: wearecentralpa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
SoftBank, notorious for their propping up of WeWork, is now backing a European consumer short-term credit firm called Klarna, which is also backed by Snoop Dogg. So if the Dutch want to pay for their tulip bulbs in installments, they can
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
9 years and $365 million later, Star Citizen unable to successfully launch an elevator
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Civil Rights Movement)
 
 
 
Newsmax lashes out against General Mills' "gay Lucky Charms leprechaun" and says Kelloggs is also forcing children to be "confused about their gender". Someone has issues
source: thenewcivilrightsmovement.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(York Press, UK)
 
 
 
Move over big chip guy. Here's bigger chip guy
source: yorkpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WOWT Omaha)
 
 
 
Governor Lex Luthor of Nebraska finds out that his "The Cruelty's The Point" policy only goes so far
source: wowt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBAY Green Bay)
 
 
 
Balls aren't the only thing getting ripped off at the annual Testicle Festival. In other news, apparently there's an annual Testicle Festival
source: wbay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 New York)
 
 
 
McDonald's hates to raise wages so much that it would rather give away free iPhones to attract workers instead
source: fox5ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Law and Crime)
 
 
 
"Alan Dershowitz Sues Netflix for $80 Million Over 'Deliberately One-Sided' Jeffrey Epstein Documentary Series". In other news, Alan Dershowitz apparently thinks there are "two sides" to the Epstein story
source: lawandcrime.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 26, 2021
(Twitter)
 
 
 
These "Kids" need to schedule colonoscopies, but this is good news nonetheless
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Japan's top newspaper: "オリンピックをキャンセルする"
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
Not just another conspiracy theory, QAnon is actually disappearing from mainstream public social media platforms
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Ex-NYPD cop, murderer, and Fox News contributor Pat Brosnan has identified the culprit in the San Jose shooting. Vaccines
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: What do vaccinated Kentuckians do for Memorial Day weekend?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Elizabeth Taylor's ex-husband has died. No not him, nor him, nor him ... yeah, I know it's a long list. Probably quicker to click the link
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Too much hummus can be bad for you
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
Bannon's attorney Bob Costello says judge's decision to dismiss the criminal charges due to the President's pardon was correct because Bannon "has never been found guilty of anything, and he's not guilty", forgetting the "pardon implies guilt" part
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Funiculi, Funiculaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Florida man takes news of grand jury convening as well as you'd expect
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
I don't think anyone has ever said OAN is credible, let alone a "news" source
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouGov)
 
 
 
25% of Americans admit the truth. The other 75% can brag all they want, but NO ONE is good at parallel parking, now matter what you might think
source: today.yougov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
News: Man busted for possession of child porn is released pending trial. Fark: Same man busted again for possession of child porn. Facepalm: Not using seven boxies. Instead; one DropBoxie
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 25, 2021
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Wayne Gretzky leaves the Edmonton Oilers. This is not a repeat from 1988
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
"Police search for driver who nearly hit officer on Washington Avenue" - with video that shows...why you can't trust headlines or police
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
"Police search for driver who nearly hit officer on Washington Avenue" - with video that shows...why you can't trust headlines or police
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Subby will never believe another celebrity endorsement after this heartbreaking news
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
The Beach Boys and blues legend Buddy Guy are both touring this summer. In other news, blues legend Buddy Guy is still alive
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Looks like NYC is back to pre-pandemic levels
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
In today's Powerpuff Update, The CW has cancelled the pilot, so no series. It's the kiddie pr0n thing, isn't it? Wait, a new pilot? Wonderful news, back to you in the studio
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Good vaccine news keeps rolling in: "Among approximately 101 million vaccinated people in the US as of April 30...0.01% breakthrough cases among the fully vaccinated." Even including the variants
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
54% of Americans would consider leaving employer if it didn't speak out against racial injustice. In related news, 33% of Americans would consider leaving employer if they didn't restock the Funyuns in the vending machine
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
My god, the normalcy is astonishing
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Newsmax reporter mocks AOC for going to therapy for surviving a domestic terror attack
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Today in not news to anyone: Seth Rogen says he smokes pot all day every day
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
Who knew that one could do their job more times than anyone else in history and still be horrible at it?
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
Fox News warns "They" are up to something
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed News)
 
 
 
Montana COVID kook renting out AirBnB only to the unvaccinated. Scary tag spending another summer vacation in self-isolation
source: buzzfeednews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Crooks & Liars)
 
 
 
OAN is repeatedly warning viewers about those unreliable pinko commie networks. FARK: Newsmax and FOX. ULTRAFARK: because those networks admitted Biden won the 2020 race
source: crooksandliars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 24, 2021
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The GOP had values?
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Obvious: Qevin McCarthy shouldn't be speaker of the house, Fark: oh shiat Bobert wants the job, Florida: Gaetz endorses Bobert
source: coloradotimesrecorder.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
John Oliver: I'm sure making a bogus product with a plain blanket touted to cure vaginal issues with tech "developed in Germany 80 years ago" wouldn't pass muster for morning news programs, would it? Austin, SLC, and Denver: Just pay us and shill
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
John Oliver: I'm sure making a bogus product with a plain blanket touted to cure vaginal issues with tech "developed in Germany 80 years ago" wouldn't pass muster for morning news programs, would it? Austin, SLC, and Denver: Just pay us and shill
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
The Mercury News asks the hard-hitting question -- what's causing the drought? "Lack of Rain" strangely absent
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
New York and Maryland have now created vaccine lotteries
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 35 Orlando)
 
 
 
If Tyerune is found shot to death and Doug and Jasmine are suspects, than X equals the arrest of middle school math teacher Martesha. Investigators will solve for Y
source: fox35orlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Done before: Man attempts to run down cops with car. New: In the police station. In other news, Havre de Grace has moved closer to Baltimore than when subby lived there
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Another Angry Nerd)
 
 
 
Someone has a problem with Spanky's
source: inputmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Not news: Talk show host laments woke culture's affect on humor with comedian. News: In 1967. Fark: The comedian (Groucho Marx) sides with woke (Timestamp 29:27)
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
Not news: flopping to draw a foul. News: while on the bench. Fark: after you've already fouled out of the game
source: uproxx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"My mother has turned into a crazed conspiracy theorist and she's not listening to reason, just OAN and Fox News and Newsmax. How can I save her?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 22, 2021
(My Panhandle)
 
 
 
Apparently the punishment for allegedly killing a pedestrian in Florida is deportation to Guatemala
source: mypanhandle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Ex-Yankee catcher alleges Colorado Rockies used Astros' sign-stealing scheme in 2018 with a Theragun and a TV. COINCIDENTALLY they were not a sack of crap that year and made the postseason
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
News that will come as a surprise to absolutely no one, travel edition
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 21, 2021
(C|Net)
 
 
 
NASA releases cool aerial shot of alien vehicle roaming the planet
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Gavin Newsom's guardian angel is Netflix CEO Reed Hastings, who is shelling out cash to protect the embattled governor
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Another benchmark met on turning real life into Snow Crash
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
IOC vice president announces Tokyo Olympics will go ahead even if Covid-19 state of emergency is still in effect. That is exciting news for everybody in the doping business and the two dozen people who are still interested in the Olympic Games
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Drunk broadcaster's incoherent news report from the 1930s goes viral. Drew was this your grandfather?
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Alex Rodriguez launches makeup for men. Ichiban spokesperson Joseph Tribbiani unavailable for comment
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Bitcoin crashes below $40,000 on news that the digital Beanie Babies are growing less popular with the cool kids. Diamond hands once again proves a poor investment strategy
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Hey guys, you know what sticks up into the skyline of most towns, contains a mixture of carcasses and feces and is very, very rarely cleaned?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
Good news lonely singles, the White House has "teamed up" with nine of the country's biggest dating apps to make algorithms that gives you a better shot at hooking up if you're vaxxed
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Hollywood has heard your pleas, and will be releasing "Hocus Pocus 2" with the original stars including Bette Midler. Don't forget to say thank you, America
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Good news, everybody. If IHOP was just too stinkin' fancy for your dining enjoyment, they've got a new spin-off restaurant, "Flip'd by IHOP," that gives you a "fast casual" experience instead
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
Free-market, anti-tax, anti-worker club is livid that the government won't solve their IT problems
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Don't keep farking that chicken
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 20, 2021
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Shatner reveals recent press reports announcing he's 90 years old are fake CNN news, and he's really a 55-year-old cowboy
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Not news: UNC denies tenure to journalism prof. News: First time ever tenure wasn't offered to the person in this particular Chaired position. Fark: she's a MacArthur fellow who won a Pulitzer Prize for leading the NYT's "1691 Project"
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
News: The intern who helped keep Gabrielle Giffords alive will now run for her seat. Fark: He'll be running against the trauma surgeon who operated on her that day
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Showing they learned their lesson after writing snarky, dismissive editorials on Trump's 'unqualified' run for President, the Daily News writes a snarky, dismissive editorial on Andrew Giuliani's 'unqualified' run for Governor
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Today's Slatesplanation: All the "Girls5eva" Easter Eggs you missed. In other news, there's something called "Girls5eva." Also, it has Easter Eggs
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
What do you do with leftover meal points after classes go remote? Spend hundreds of dollars of them to help feed the homeless
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitch.tv)
 
 
 
7 PM Eastern - it's the Fark News Livestream, Duke Sucks Butts Falling Off Bees edition
source: twitch.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Bye Bye Lil' Sebastian
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Q: Why are so many people more afraid of dying from a shark attack or fiery plane crash than cancer or COVID? A: Because we're very, very stupid when it comes to understanding/calculating odds. See also, "lottery ticket buyers" and "crypto investors"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
The phone systems in prisons are major profit sources and kickbacks and reform is needed. And it's a fairly fascinating insight into how profit works when it comes to prisons
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IGN)
 
 
 
Berserk has another Day of the Black Sun it won't recover from. Kentaro Miura passes away at 54 years young
source: ign.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJAC TV Johnstown)
 
 
 
Researchers find the origins of a colony of monkeys in south Florida. In other news, there is a colony of monkeys in south Florida
source: wjactv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
The NY Daily News comments on Trump's little lapdog Mitch protecting him and peeing on the Jan 6th commission in their usual, understated way
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
♬ See you in September. See you when the summer's through for your Covid booster shot
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
I have some grave news : 250 new tombs have been discovered in Egypt. Well, I say "new", but what's a few thousand years between friends?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Straits Times)
 
 
 
Singapore slings "correction direction" upon fake news disseminators like Facebook, Twitter, and forums, warns them not to let users refer to latest Covid-19 variant as the Singapore Strain
source: straitstimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Amateur Bitcoin traders describe the horrors of the recent selloff. "I woke up at 4 a.m. I checked Robinhood, finally went back to sleep, woke back up again, checked Robinhood, and then I got on Reddit"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
I mean, who doesn't want a Cher biopic?
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 19, 2021
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Fox News says Dominion's lawsuit against them should be dismissed because "both sides"
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Retiring? OhFark!
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS San Francisco)
 
 
 
San Jose, CA wants to set up "Humanitarian Zones" for homeless campers. Space station captains and crew welcomed, but just don't start a riot
source: sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
Orioles finally catch a break with news that Chris Davis will miss the rest of the season after undergoing hip surgery
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Civil Rights Movement)
 
 
 
Fox News learns about "local mask rules" while Biden mockery backfires
source: thenewcivilrightsmovement.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Thanks, Obama
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
The UK's Princess Beatrice announces she's expecting, but being 11th in line to the throne, the little one has practically no chance at being a Queen Bea
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
According to the article headline, the 1/6 commission is ideal in its current form
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Paul Mooney still thinks Wayne Brady makes Bryant Gumbel look like Malcolm X, but from beyond the grave
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Lowes beats numbers, falls on news it's not Home Depot
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minor League Baseball)
 
 
 
In other news, Osiris plays on Jupiter
source: milb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Post US)
 
 
 
From the realms of the unexpected: Alcohol-free Irish pub to open in Abu Dhabi. Isn't that just a cafe?
source: irishpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Ozzy Osbourne calls wife Sharon the "mizzt inravimgapigeon" he's ever met
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Breaking into a car? Not really news. Breaking into a car owned by a UFC Heavyweight fighter? That's news ... and a serious butt whipping
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Sharon Stone just can't stop the release of the XXX Basic Instinct. There's no way, this film just can't be released, it will ruin her. Oh, can't somebody please stop the release of XXX Basic Instinct? She can't do it alone. Somebody, please
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
This will end well. Again
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
"Everything looked normal for the first time in a long time" - Happy guy pays every diner's bill and tips all waiters $500
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
"Everything looked normal for the first time in a long time" - Happy guy pays every diner's bill and tips all waiters $500
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hack A Day)
 
 
 
Not news: You can buy a motorcycle airbag for $400. Fark: Plus $12/month for a subscription, without which the airbag is worthless
source: hackaday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Valley News Live)
 
 
 
Man in Fargo attacks live news crew. Fargo trifecta now complete
source: valleynewslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Good news, Farkers: Any alcohol consumption is bad for your brain. Oh, wait, that's bad news. Subby doesn't brain too good for some reason
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 18, 2021
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Bank of America to boost minimum wage to $25/hr by 2025. In completely unrelated news, all BofA branches to be fully automated by 2024
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
A brief history of Massive Intelligence Failures in the United States. 1) Pearl Harbor. 2) The Tet Offensive. 3) 9-11. 4) UFOs. 5) The January 6 insurrection. Wait, go back one
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Today)
 
 
 
Do you like soy sauce? How about brownies? Have we got news for you
source: today.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Music lawsuits, digital tokens, cars, and things people steal from dead French dudes are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 2-8 Googly Eyes Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
JPMorgan names two women executives in broad expansion of leadership diversity
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
Fox News is a loaded gun aimed at American democracy
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Not news: Burglary suspect whose face was caught on surveillance video arrested. Fark: After bakery put his digitized image on their cookies and sold them
source: fox13news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Stock market super psyched about Home Depot, then depressed after realizing housing starts lower than expected on news that lumber is more valuable than gold
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
Fox News has elevated Ron DeSantis to the true 2024 GOP presidential contender
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 17, 2021
(CNBC)
 
 
 
In other news, there are Elon Musk impersonators
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Food and Wine)
 
 
 
It's Monday. How about some good news for two of Fark's favorite states?
source: foodandwine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
US to send 20 million vaccines from all three brands overseas by next month. Iran, North Korea, and Venezuela all getting J&J? Must be a coincidence
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Bill Gates divorce is getting uglier and uglier
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Microsoft says it investigated Bill Gates' involvement with an employee back in 2000. Did he step down in 2020 because of this? Spokesman: BSoD
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Israeli warship attacked with large fireworks. Nuclear response expected in 3, 2, 1 (possible nsfw content on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Some people set world records for their athletic abilities. Others on their unique skills. Then there's THIS guy
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
In business news from 2004, Redbox will go public via SPAC so a whole bunch of new people can lose money investing in old technology
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
Not news: saw splits tree down the middle. Holy fark: collision with tree splits car down the middle
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 16, 2021
(Delish.com)
 
 
 
If you're going to open a Harry Potter store in NY, then of course you have to have a Butterbeer Bar
source: delish.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
If Devin Qunes has evidence that the Trump Administration funded a bioweapon in a Wuhan lab resulting in a global pandemic, he should probably notify the White House before telling a FoxNews audience
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Keloland)
 
 
 
Things have gone off the rails in Iowa. (Not a repeat from yesterday, that was Minnesota)
source: keloland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Gee... it's so unlike Fox News to just make things up. Can I borrow the fainting couch from yesterday?
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
If you had high hopes for the new John Barrowman and David Tennant Dr. Who audio series, we have some bad news for you
source: io9.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"We are happy to report that the missing tiger seen in a Houston neighborhood last week has been found and appears to be unharmed." In other news, the same neighborhood reports a dramatic increase in the number of missing dog and cat flyers
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 15, 2021
(Nintendo Life)
 
 
 
Nintendo fans rave about Switch's new GOTY candidate "Calculator"
source: nintendolife.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Bashir resigns for health reasons ahead of report that will be critical of his handling of scoring the Princess Di interview, but we all know that's BS and that it's because he's going on a mission for Section 31
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
 
 
 
It's just that older drivers have a one track mind
source: triblive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Gavin Newsom has to face another challenge: summer blackouts
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Since this is the silly season for the NFL when all the news is, well, silly, here's your annual "This year the Browns are legit, no we mean it, stop laughing" article
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Jail? Ain't nobody got time for that
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 28 New York)
 
 
 
Mark it zero, McSmokey
source: wwnytv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 14, 2021
(National Park Service)
 
 
 
Not news: being trapped by an avalanche while mountaineering in Glacier. News: being trapped by an avalanche while bicycling in Glacier
source: nps.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Wrap)
 
 
 
When your anti-Semitism is so bad that Newsmax suspends your ass, you've really done something
source: thewrap.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KITV Honolulu)
 
 
 
Beachgoers warned to stay away from monk seals as they haven't finished their celibacy vows yet
source: kitv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed News)
 
 
 
Today's Tech privacy fail: Joe Biden's Venmo account. Fark: found in less than 10 minutes, thanks to Venmo making your friends list public
source: buzzfeednews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
How Biden ruined Jared Kushner's everlasting middle east peace in five months
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mational Day Calendar)
 
 
 
Today is National Decency Day, so let's all take a moment to be kind to each other, to show respect to other people's points of view, and to appreciate how wonderful Subby is for posting this headline
source: nationaldaycalendar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Capitol Hill Seattle)
 
 
 
Not News: Police used teargas and blast bombs on protestors. News: Office of Police Accountability determines the police were at fault. Fark: Police Chief overturns the findings of the Office of Police Accountability
source: capitolhillseattle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
Fox News tries to invent crises where none exists
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Republican demands Fox News tell the truth. That's the joke
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 13, 2021
(National Post)
 
 
 
Trudeau did NOT violate ethics law this time, but will probably apologize anyway
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
Good news to all you frontline heroes. Ohio is ready to send you back to your poverty wages just in time for the June onslaught of unvaccinated people without masks. We salute you, Ohio heroes, for the 18,304 dollars a year that your lives are worth
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
Fooling people into thinking you care is good for the bottom line
source: