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headlines found matching 'New Jersey'
Mon May 25, 2020
(The US Sun)
 
 
 
Things seem to be returning to normal, as shootings break out at FL and SC beaches
source: the-sun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
The purge begins
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
New York launches "Closing The Barn Door After The Horses Got Out" loan program aimed at small businesses that had enough cash on hand to get through the past ten weeks
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 24, 2020
(AP News)
 
 
 
Of course it started at a country club
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 23, 2020
(NBC News)
 
 
 
You can't lead the world in COVID-19 deaths if you just don't count them all. (taps side of head, looks on knowingly)
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
New York Jets finally get an elite quarterback
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 22, 2020
(NBC News)
 
 
 
N.J. woman accused of fatally beating wife with wine chiller captured in Texas. Wine chiller currently under interrogation Lone Star style
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Beach towns have one message for NYC residents: fuhgeddabouddit
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Jersey shore braces for a plague worse than COVID, the invasion of the unlocked-down New Yorkers
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
It's Morrissey's birthday. Make him happy and cancel your plans
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 21, 2020
(Radio.com)
 
 
 
NYC announces an immediate doubling of service to export Staten Islanders out of Manhattan. Still no cure for New Jersey
source: 1010wins.radio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
With summer driving season about to start, nobody really knows how many jackasses or sickos (you decide) will be on the road
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
'The South is gonna rise again.' Fark: In COVID-19 cases
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Small businesses will have to shut down for good despite all those loans
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 20, 2020
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Just in case your forgot, Sec of State Pompeo was a former CIA agent despised by his coworkers and a tea-party congressman who annoyed even his fellow "freedom caucus" Republicans so much they were overjoyed when he left Congress
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Pompeo explodes at press conference. Leaves ashes
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 19, 2020
(Law and Crime)
 
 
 
White House lawyers: "Please dismiss this lawsuit over us gutting the EPA as is our absolute immunity right according to Constitution, v.2020" ..... CA Federal judge: "As if"
source: lawandcrime.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Texas, North Carolina, and Arizona all began "re-opening" last week, and in what is surely a coincidence, all three reported a record-high number of new Coronavirus cases on Saturday
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 18, 2020
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
"I've got a buddy who's an expert, and he says the most I should give you for this Jadeveon Clowney is about $8-9M. Tops"
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Thousands re-enlist rather than leave the military, possibly after taking a look and seeing how unsafe it is out there now
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Jersey 101.5)
 
 
 
Protestors who look like they haven't seen the inside of a gym since 11th grade come out to support opening of gym despite government orders to stay closed
source: nj1015.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Is it safe to ride in elevators during the coronavirus pandemic? As long as you take proper steps, it has its ups and downs on many levels. Some rides are uplifting and others will let you down
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
911, what's the emergency? There are two small children playing in an empty, but open, park with their father. This is going to be such a fun summer
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Maryland bar unveils social distancing intertube contraptions for drinkers. Bonus: you won't get hurt when falling over after getting blotto
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 17, 2020
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Badges, we don't need no stinkin' badges...oh wait, it's New Jersey? I guess you do need badges. Never mind
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 15, 2020
(WJAC TV Johnstown)
 
 
 
The war of fee fees has begun. First lawmaker to introduce resolution to impeach Governor for reasons, unhinged, uninfringed
source: wjactv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Jersey 101.5)
 
 
 
Trump said he doesn't want to see a "new normal" with people distant from each other and needing to wear masks in public. "Who wants to do that?" Just a guess but people who don't want to die or infect others for the greater good?
source: nj1015.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
So this means we can have all their stuff, right?
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Gelfling unable to secure emergency divorce from French muppet, hmmmmmmmmm
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 14, 2020
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
You will once again be able to start spending weekends* at the Jersey Shore. *water fountains, fireworks shows, contact sports, arcades, amusement rides, sit down restaurants, picnic areas, playgrounds not included, but at least you're not home
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Brian Kilmeade (who is currently doing Fox and Friends from his home) opines that Wisconsin Supreme Court decision to slaughter thousand of Americans will kickstart Pennsylvania and New Jersey to kick start their own slaughters
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Whenever this pandemic ends, here's how we uncouple our supply chain from China
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
*huuurk* I'd better plant more food in the garden
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 13, 2020
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Russia bans ventilators from being used because they tend to start fires. First, though, they need to send some to the US
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Uber+Grubhub gets a 👎🏼from lawmakers and city officials who don't see any benefit to consolidating delivery services. And that's before the restaurant owners put in their two cents, because that's all they'll have before this is over
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
NYC officials proposed using streets, curbs and sidewalks for businesses to open up for socially distant dining and drinking, making it easier for panhandlers to talk to people
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 12, 2020
(NFL)
 
 
 
Tagovailoa has the top selling jerseys in the NFL, followed by Brady, then Tagovialoa
source: nfl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Goodbye Ruby Tuesday
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 11, 2020
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
New York State to start re-opening by the end of the week. Not yours NYC
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Let's reopen state parks but leave restrooms closed. What could possibly go wrong?
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Those drive-by celebrations for birthdays and other milestones? Yeah, New Jersey State Police's superintendent Col. Buzzkill is not a fan
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Jersey 101.5)
 
 
 
Before you get too excited about pop-up drive in movie theaters NJ, the state's only actual drive-in movie theater remains closed due to coronavirus
source: nj1015.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Urgent care provider CityMD: You 15,000 people with coronavirus antibodies? Um, yeah, well darn the luck - it seems you're not - and there's no easy, non-lawsuity way to say this - you're maybe not so immune as we might have suggested. Oopsy
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 10, 2020
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Businesses sue to end shut down saying there is no epidemic in Maine
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 09, 2020
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Warning: You may want to back away slowly from this article about a man who's been 'dating a ghost' for two years and now all of a sudden fears she's cheating on him by bonking other men during the coronavirus lockdown (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 08, 2020
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Pennsylvania Health Secretary tells local residents to not go to the Jersey Shore. In a strange coincidence, Jersey Shore residents don't want Pennsylvanians to go either
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Decider)
 
 
 
While he appreciates the gesture, and would like to remind the NYPD he is sober now and has not taken possession, Pete Davidson begs fans to stop leaving drugs on his mother's doorstep
source: decider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 07, 2020
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Why should Neiman Marcus and J.Crew have all the fun this week, ponders Nordstrom
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SILive)
 
 
 
Nurses are underpaid and it wasn't like her 70 year old dying coronavirus patient needed his credit card anymore anyway
source: silive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Christie's Bridgegate accomplices have convictions thrown out because "federal fraud statutes at issue do not criminalize all deception, corruption, abuse of power"
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Philadelphia)
 
 
 
University of Pennsylvania's Wharton School predicts 350,000 coronavirus deaths by end of June if we re-open everything. Fortunately our president attended that school and will no doubt heed its warning
source: philadelphia.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
America once again needs to be labeled a third world country, it's coronavirus recovery is way behind Europe's because of its lame lockdown policies
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 06, 2020
(Vox)
 
 
 
You citizens of America need to face the brutal truth in these coronavirus times: America isn't as exceptional as it thinks it is
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Some childish farker is apparently in charge of the official New Jersey twitter account
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Interstate COVID compacts to reopen together are instead going all Hunger Games within themselves
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Wire)
 
 
 
JetBlue to honor 100,000 healthcare workers by placing them in sealed flying petri dishes. They're also doing a low altitude flyover of NYC for the nightly 7pm front-line workers cheer
source: businesswire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Channel)
 
 
 
On this day in history, in 1937, the huge manatee arrived in New Jersey
source: history.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 05, 2020
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Florida so terrible that 72yo woman flees toward Coronavirus hot spot
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Poll: most Americans disbelieve officially reported coronavirus death counts. Difficulty: Republicans think fewer people have died than officially reported
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Chris Christie says we need to accept death, and welcome it like a delicious cream pie
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 04, 2020
(Politico)
 
 
 
Governor Cuomo announces that schools' out for the summer in New Jersey ... Oh wait, that's Governor Murphy. It only feels like Andy speaks for everyone in these parts
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
From the "this is not normal" files: Seven northeastern states join together to buy PPE at a bulk discount. If only there were a way for even more states to participate, maybe all of them at once
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Radio.com)
 
 
 
If your team is the reason you drink, now you have incentive to stay home
source: wfan.radio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Guess whose NJ gold club reopened this weekend. Come on, guess
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 03, 2020
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Republican State Senator clutches his pearls over highly offensive wording on official NJ signage. FARK: The word in question is "knucklehead"
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
As some states put their collective toes into reopening, COVID-19 death numbers managed an almost 9/11 on Saturday
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 01, 2020
(AP News)
 
 
 
Labs remain the US' top doggo for a record-extending 203rd year, but corgis are catching up as fast as their little legs will let them. Tag is for all very good bois
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Lost among the debate of when sports should restart is that college football has no single governing body, and the SEC and BIG12 aren't going to care about anyone else
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
Who will rise? Who will fall? Did your favorite make the list? It's your 2020 Puppy Power Rankings
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Victoria's Secret private deal gets cock blocked
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Radio.com)
 
 
 
Who was that masked man who licked a woman on the subway? Seriously, police want to know
source: 1010wins.radio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
NRA board member encourages Flu Klux Klan protests and says "they can't arrest all of us"
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 30, 2020
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
The USNS Comfort is now leaving New York harbor today for its home port in Virginia. Goodbye trying to help hospital ship
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 29, 2020
(Buzzfeed News)
 
 
 
One simple trick to make $69 million
source: buzzfeednews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
US media last week: "China's sweeping bodies under the rug, their death toll was 50% higher than they said it was." US media this week: "Uh, so we checked under our rug"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 28, 2020
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
NYC says F this to giving students F grades this semester
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Delaware Online)
 
 
 
Testing poultry plant workers for COVID-19 is a dumb idea because millions of chickens must be killed
source: delawareonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Bold of you to assume you could buy magazines at a bookstore
source: goodereader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 27, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Happy Birthday Kate - Our B-52 is B-72 today
source: albumism.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
You made the old man cry. There, are you punks happy now? Now get of his damn lawn
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun April 26, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
This is a rental. It's Fran from Bethel
source: 92moose.fm   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat April 25, 2020
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Chicago to ban horse-drawn carriages by the end of 2020, presumably to make way for steam-powered automobiles
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 24, 2020
(NPR)
 
 
 
The Justice Department is looking to crack down on COVID-19 fraudsters. Hey, Barr, I've got a tip about where you can find one of the biggest ringleaders at around 5:00 this afternoon
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Giants GM covered his face because he was spending time with a strange young fellow in his home
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Roger Goodell's big NFL Draft 2020 error last night had nothing to do with a technical glitch
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 23, 2020
(The Ringer)
 
 
 
LeBron surpasses Kobe, Kobe dies, neither one of them can get better ratings than 20 year old MJ footage
source: theringer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(slow ride)
 
 
 
Dirty old cars in the dirty old streets of NYC circa the 70's
source: flashbak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 22, 2020
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
His hopes for the White House dashed, Mike Bloomberg donates $10M and volunteers to help develop and implement a regionally coordinated contact tracing program. What has your president done for you?
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Breaking into funeral homes naked and leaving beers in coffins is no way to go through life, son
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
You can't handle the truth about your crappy Nicholson impression. Just smilex, and wish Jack a happy 83rd
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Governor Cuomo mooooving towards opening up parts of New York where there are more cows than people
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Mayor de Blasio announces that Macy's annual NYC 4th of July fireworks show will go on, somehow, someway
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 21, 2020
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Which U.S. states have idiots for governors?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Choose cardboard caskets, it's better for the environment and faster to burn down in the crematorium
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 20, 2020
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Massachusetts is becoming a Covid-19 hawt spawt
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
That's HOAshiat
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Driving in a self contained vehicle through a tulip farm is a social gathering in the great Garden State
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SILive)
 
 
 
No one shows up for Republican Staten Island "End the Lockdown" rally to protest the current "New York on PAUSE" mandates under Gov. Andrew Cuomo, leaves the NYPD standing alone and perplexed
source: silive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Anti-quarantine announcements shut down by Facebook. alt-COVID reportedly now hiring sign twirlers
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Barron's)
 
 
 
The smart money's betting on online gambling
source: barrons.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seven Days)
 
 
 
Primitive hockey stick valued at $3.5 million
source: sevendaysvt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Remember that nursing home in New Jersey where an anonymous tipster reported 17 elderly dead in body bags piled in a storage room just a few days ago? Well they may have downplayed the real number somewhat
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Don't like grocery stores without toilet paper? You're gonna love grocery stores without shoppers
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat April 18, 2020
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
A deep dive into how to understand the testing figures being released. Short summary: the US is an outlier in number of positives, but it's still only those with obvious symptoms being counted
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politicus USA)
 
 
 
They say to me "Sir, we think you're doing a great job"
source: politicususa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 17, 2020
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Rules don't apply to Matt Gaetz
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Want to know why the White House's coronavirus task force keeps downplaying the coronavirus's spread in less-populated states? It's the stooopid and it burns
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Truly, these are the end times. Coronavirus may force NJ to let people pump their own goddamn gas
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
With the sports world silenced by pandemic, Vegas starts betting on escorts.... Escorts? How does that work? Bet on how fast she can.... What? .... Oh ... esports .... Never mind
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Like most Americans, this skunk is completely addicted to ranch dressing
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
The governors of Missouri, Iowa, and South Dakota declined to work with the smarter Midwestern governors on how to open up the region's economy again
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
America needs new names for the state alliances forming to circumvent Trump. Any ideas, Farkers?
source: paleofuture.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 16, 2020
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Stop feeling bad for yourself; coronavirus may have hurt Dak Prescott's leverage against the Cowboys and chances of being a $100 million quarterback
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Reporter who has obviously not been locked in his house for the last four weeks with his wife and children asks NJ Governor why liquor stores are essential but churches are not
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Quick note: If you've had 17 old people die from COVID-19 in the nursing home you manage, hiding their bodies in a shed or empty room isn't going to stop people from looking for them
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 14, 2020
(AP News)
 
 
 
Vape pods, a pregnancy test, turkey baster, plastic vampire teeth, cremation bag, and a full pickle jar. Remnants of the last Fark Party incident, or garbage on a New Jersey beach?
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
NY Gov. Cuomo one-ups Trump in his battle with the White House over the state's management of the coronavirus crisis: "The president will have no fight from me"
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Laughing Squid)
 
 
 
Rainbow appears over New York City during the 7 o'clock cheer. But what does it mean? You can't explain that
source: laughingsquid.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Connecticut Post)
 
 
 
Eight huge new pieces of positive news about the coronavirus that we could all use right about now
source: ctpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Remember that Big East basketball tournament last month that was cancelled at halftime of a game when someone released it could pose a public health problem? This reporter remembers, and is only now recovered from COVID-19
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Man arrested twice in three hours for entering Wawa without mask. Punishment for the third time is a cage match with Wawa deprived NJ coffee addicts
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
"Unemployment checks are being held up by a coding language almost nobody knows". Come on dude, we all know it's COBOL, why does it take you four paragraphs to say it?
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Not content with a stock market crash, pandemic, bars closed and virtual speakeasies, compression of the roaring 1920s into the first few months of the 2020s continues with the worst economic downturn since the Great Depression
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Excuse me? Governor Cuomo? Can we join your I95 gang?
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 13, 2020
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Protip: It's important to pay attention if you're operating a ski lift
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Midwest MMA fighter brings the fight to NYC hospital
source: wizmnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Pete's basement is full of beautiful women
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Note to people walking on tracks: trains are really bad at social distancing
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(No good deeds)
 
 
 
Even if you can afford a house right now, no one will sell you one
source: thehustle.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat April 11, 2020
(NPR)
 
 
 
NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio: "Due to the pandemic, all NYC public schools will be closed for the remainder of the school year." Gov. Andrew Cuomo: "Oh, I don't think so"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Good news: We've passed "peak death toll" ... and if anyone calls their Icelandic Death Metal / Mandy Moore crossover tribute band by that name, well, I'd probably buy a ticket to your virtual concert
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
3M sues distributor who are selling their masks to states at a marked up price under the guise of patent infringement
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 10, 2020
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Florida Man places thousands of dollars in fake pizza orders for NJ cops, runs one pizza parlor out of business
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Worry not you NYC idiots, Mayor Bill de Blasio says he has no regrets about telling you drunks to visit bars the day before they were shut down to contain the spread of coronavirus
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Guess who just got back today. The bunnies are back in town, the bunnies are back
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
On hearing that many of his followers plan to gather in his name on Easter despite COVID-19, God decides to send tornadoes to stop those idiots
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
New York state now has more coronavirus cases than any single country outside the USA. [FACEPALM] tag quarantined after touching its face, [FAIL] tag is at an anti-shutdown protest, and [FLORIDA] is nervously sweating at the community senior center
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
It's almost like you're saying being rich is better during a pandemic?
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 09, 2020
(The New Yorker)
 
 
 
Fran Lebowitz reminds you that she ran out of farks to give in 1983, weighs in on Trump, de Blasio, Cuomo, Biden, Bloomberg, Giuliani, Sanders, and Warren
source: newyorker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Good news: Total hospitalizations in NY rose by only 200 yesterday. Bad news: Because 799 beds were "freed" up
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Do you know COBOL? If so, you are desperately needed to help process unemployment claims. You should also schedule a colonoscopy soon
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 08, 2020
(Medium)
 
 
 
Think the government only needs retired doctors and nurses to help out during the crisis? They are also desperate for COBOL programmers to keep state systems up and running during the surge in workloads
source: onezero.medium.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
What has life been like for those whose spouses are on the front lines of the Coronavirus fight?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
NJ stores and supermarkets to start limiting customers to 50% of capacity. Which shouldn't be too hard as they won't be allowing customers without impossible-to-find face masks in the first place
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Veteran film character actor Allen Garfield dies from COVID-19 at age 80. Nermal inconsolable
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
'Stop, disperse, and go home' New Jersey city will use drones to yell at people not social distancing
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Yeah, but can your ventilator run Crysis?
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
"What's really important is that people don't turn these early signs of hope into releasing from the 30 days to stop the spread. If people start going out again and socially interacting, we could see a very acute second wave very early"
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
Border towns in New Jersey and West Virginia have been crowded with Pennsylvania residents leaving their state to buy liquor
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 07, 2020
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
New Jersey nurse raises over $12,000 with GoFundMe campaign to buy personal protective gear for her colleagues, so of course she's suspended by her hospital
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Members of Refuse Fascism Philly place symbolic "body bags" at the entrance to the Trump National Golf Club
source: popularresistance.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
NJ Governor Phil Murphy is getting really mad at jackasses violating social distancing with the knuckleheads
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Interesting, brief Shoprite shopper report from the front line in NJ. tl;tr -- stay away
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
New Jersey lawyer 'sorry' for putting on Pink Floyd concert on his front lawn. Insists he didn't invite people over to chant "F*ck the police" when they arrived
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Law firms lay off associates due to lack of work, ergo NJ to allow 2020 law school graduates to be de facto attorneys and practice law without a license ad hoc as long as a respondeat superior is around. Caveat emptor
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 06, 2020
(The Intercept)
 
 
 
Timeline set to diverge into one of two future Americas, depending on Democrats' willingness to blame Trump for his own actions. Tag is for likely outcome
source: theintercept.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
The NHL will end up better as a result of the COVID-19 closure because many of its terrible franchises will go bust
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Let's all not give each other reach arounds just yet, but the coronavirus epidemic curve is already flattening in New York City
source: nber.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
No
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun April 05, 2020
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Trump sending 1,000 Military personnel to NYC to help spread COVID-19
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Cops break up Pink Floyd cover band lawn party. Suspects to be charged with violating quarantine and being a Pink Floyd cover band
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat April 04, 2020
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Doing shots and eating pot brownies is fine at certain times. Before doing dental work on your patients generally isn't one of those times
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 03, 2020
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Snitches get...rewards? Are those rewards special pieces of thread that are used to close wounds?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Saturday, Donny, is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That means that I don't work, I don't drive a car, I don't fu*cking ride in a car, I don't handle money, I don't turn on the oven, and I sure as shiat DON'T F*CKING USE MY LAPTOP. Uh, until now
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Fauci tells Coach K we're not even at halftime in COVID fight. Subby hopes we don't end up in OT. Everyone agrees that Duke sucks
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 New York)
 
 
 
Hate your family, but stuck inside with them? Good news, the government is now telling families to observe social distancing. I call the room with the beer
source: fox5ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 New York)
 
 
 
Hate your family, but stuck inside with them? Good news, the government is now telling families to observe social distancing. I call the room with the beer
source: fox5ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Columbia)
 
 
 
U.S. COVID deaths is now twice as much as 9/11. That's right, 18/11 deaths
source: abccolumbia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Guess what Michigan, Connecticut, Indiana, Georgia and Illinois,? Welcome to the coronavirus pandemic, you're next up to 'enjoy' the virus. Try to stay safe and avoid the reaper of souls
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The 1000 bed USS Comfort, docked in Manhattan to relieve overwhelmed NYC hospitals, has a whopping 20 patients aboard because it bars patients with numerous preexisting conditions
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 02, 2020
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
In a timely decision, N.J. right to die law for terminally ill patients survives latest court challenge
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Snitches don't get coronavirus itches (at least it rhymes)
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPTV Portland)
 
 
 
A million cases here, a million cases there, and soon you're talking about a real hoax
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
NJDOT notices that cars are freely moving along during rush hour due to coronavirus, fixes the glitch
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
NJ town: Instead of leaving your recyclables out for socially distant curbside pickup we now want you all to drive to the recycling center and congregate instead
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Slate asks the question: Is the South ready for coronavirus? Oh, come on. We're talking about the region that gave us the Civil War, Katrina, and Atlanta being shut down by a quarter inch of snow. When has the South not been ready?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Mr. Trump considers some spots hot, he might ban travel, or he might not. If you'd go from spot to spot, it's OK if both spots are hot, and also if they both are not. But if one spot is hot and the other is not, if you go you might get shot. Great Scott
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 01, 2020
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Ron DeSantis refuses to close off or quarantine his state, and Coronavirus infections are up to 7,000
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
New Jersey's ban on self-serve gas will outlive humanity, and probably cockroaches
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live Science)
 
 
 
Let's hear stories from Farkers who had contracted COVID-19 or who have family who has. Tell us your first hand experiences and let us know if you know anyone who has succumbed to the virus
source: livescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press of Atlantic City)
 
 
 
Atlantic City casinos get an extension from reporting how bad they crapped out last month
source: pressofatlanticcity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
Photographers capture life in NYC during the pandemic
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Last night was the part of the movie where the guy playing the president switched from "Relax, everything's fine the asteroid's going to miss Earth completely" to "Yeah so the rock is already in the atmosphere, and this is an extinction level event"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 12 Westchester)
 
 
 
It's not all bad news New Jersey. Breweries are now allowed to do home beer delivery. Cheers
source: newjersey.news12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
You can catch coronavirus and you can catch a fish, but you can't catch coronavirus from a fish
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
New Jersey Governor Phil Murphy to states not taking COVID seriously - "I'm not going to put (our residents) through hell and back and flatten that curve, only to have some lowest common denominator throw gasoline on the fire"
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 31, 2020
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
So there's the iconic Manhattan skyline with the Freedom Tower, the Chrysler Building, the Eye of Sauron, Rockefeller Center, the...hey, wait
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Some Guy has All the Clues that DJT was a Wise Guy C.I
source: gregolear.substack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TooFab)
 
 
 
In New Jersey we only break quarantine to show our love, our burning love
source: amp.toofab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Spirit Airlines is temporarily dropping service to airports including New York's LaGuardia and those in Newark, Hartford, Niagara Falls and Plattsburgh, N.Y.. 10's of riders stranded
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
The Situation says this is the situation: everything sucks, no more parties. That's the situation
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 32 Chicago)
 
 
 
Last week: Stop wearing masks they don't work - This week: Everyone should wear masks. This week: Don't wear gloves they don't work - Next week: Everyone should wear gloves
source: fox32chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston Post and Courier)
 
 
 
Pentagon orders all military bases stop publicly reporting COVID-19 numbers as several bases have had significant outbreaks
source: postandcourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
New Jersey will allow gun stores to reopen during the quarantine because you never know when you might need to shoot a virus
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Civil Rights Movement)
 
 
 
New Jersey couple charged with child endangerment after hosting a Coronavirus Party where over forty morons showed up
source: thenewcivilrightsmovement.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Mass exodus seen as NJ Governor declares the state a knucklehead free zone
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
NYC man arrested for running a speakeasy. This is not a repeat from 1920
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 30, 2020
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
75% percent of the country is under shelter in place orders. Including basically every single population center
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
The nation's governors forced to sidestep, and ignore President Baby Tantrum in a desperate effort to secure aid for dying Americans
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Shoprite announces 70% off
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
Group of armed vigilantes in a Maine island town cut down tree to block in three workers from New Jersey who have been living on the island for over a month to work on a construction project. Sadly this is real life, not a Stephen King novel
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Typhoid Trump's dipshiats are now going to start blaming New York for the orange plague, and not, you know, the people that spent the first 3 months of the year calling it all a hoax
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun March 29, 2020
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
And we used to think spitting on convertibles was bad
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Four more weeks of coronavirus. Must have seen Fauci's shadow
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The US Sun)
 
 
 
It begins. Trump threatens to wall off NY; Cuomo says its a "declaration of war" and "This is a civil war kind of discussion" and Trump backs down. Gloves are off folks. Now roll "Republic of California" around on your tongue a bit to check for taste
source: the-sun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
New Jersey cops break up 47-person "Corona Party" going on in a 550-square-foot apartment during this coronavirus pandemic. "This is not a game"
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 28, 2020
(Some Seattle Guy)
 
 
 
Seattle is not necessarily your city's future, but a likely version of your future if you do the right thing
source: nytimes.com.   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
So, about that "united" part of the "United States of America"
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Trump says there will be no escape from New York, at least until he finds himself trapped there
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
Governor Ron DeSantis (R-Etreating) adds people arriving from Louisiana into quarantine along with those from New York, New Jersey, Connecticut. Only 45 states left, dude
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Trump diagnosed with TB, Transparent Bullshiat
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 27, 2020
(ProPublica)
 
 
 
ICE detainee kept imprisoned in the air
source: propublica.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Top 10 worst vacation destinations this year. Only 10? Seems like all of them should be in a tie
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Five Thirty-Eight)
 
 
 
Don't write coronavirus off as "just a blue state problem" -- red state death rates are actually slightly higher, even with less testing, and they are at an earlier point in their epidemic curves
source: fivethirtyeight.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
White House coronavirus task force coordinator assures America there's no way 20 percent of the population will be infected with coronavirus, there are plenty of ICU beds and ventilators, and the orange Kool-Aid is refreshingly delicious
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
The rich have already fled New York City. The rest of you must stay put to contain the outbreak and ensure that their evacuation was not in vain
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some New Yorker)
 
 
 
NY Gov Cuomo to hold address at 11:30 AM EST about the current state of Covid-19 in New York
source: governor.ny.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Coronavirus stigginit officially begins
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Bishop says Catholics can eat meat during Lent because we are sacrificing enough for coronavirus
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 26, 2020
(TMZ)
 
 
 
MLB jerseys (no, not game worn) being made into coronavirus masks. They'll ship just as soon as all the little Nike swooshes are stitched on
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
'On Tuesday, Jacqueline Miller put on her "protective suit," an inflatable dinosaur costume and medical gloves, to deliver seed starter kits to her neighbors and friends.'
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
How bad is it in New York City? Nurses are wearing trash bags as PPE
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
_________ has been deadliest day in reported coronavirus deaths in US is the new evergreen headline
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(North Jersey)
 
 
 
Something that may not have happened in the lifetime of anybody living in the NYC metropolitan area: Air 22% less polluted than the same time the year before
source: northjersey.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
In case you didn't realize how farked we are: New York requests 85 refrigerated trucks for guess what
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you are want to hear an actual leader update us on the Covid-19 crisis, Andrew Cuomo's news conference is underway
source: governor.ny.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Looks like all 94 residents of one New Jersey nursing home have signed up for the "Martyrs Making Trump's Economy Great Again" program
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
NJ Gov.: NYC is the "canary in the coal mine" and that canary ain't looking to good right now, and all of NJ is right there in the mine with it
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 25, 2020
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Karl-Anthony Towns' mother is in a coma, with symptoms consistent with coronavirus. Subby doesn't have anything clever for you
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Top Chef Masters winner Floyd Cardoz dies after coronavirus diagnosis
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
"We Are Your Future So say we all" says William Adama, captain of the Battlestar Galacitca
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
New Jersey ranks in the top 5 states for social distancing And that was before coronavirus
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
A 75 year dream has finally come true. Drivers will no longer have to pay cash to drive on the NJ Turnpike or Garden State Parkway. Of course there's a catch
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Blessed be the ones who deliver alcohol to our doorsteps in these desperate times
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Possibly some goodish news from New York
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
"Knucklehead" charged with terroristic threats, harassment and obstruction after coughing on a supermarket employee and telling her he had coronavirus. The things people will do to not use their own toilet paper
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
NYC is about two days away from just stacking bodies like cord-wood in Central Park
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
GMs want Draft delayed, but league says not po$ible for $ome rea$on
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Sports)
 
 
 
NBC Sports helps out our hockey withdrawal symptoms by airing some modern classic games. STFU past Pierre
source: nhl.nbcsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Nothing to fear New Yorkers, don't worry about that makeshift morgue outside Bellevue Hospital being built by the military
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A group of Chinese immigrants have created a live coronavirus tracker for North America that includes county level data based on confirmed sources
source: coronavirus.1point3acres.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 24, 2020
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
The following NYC subway lines are not running due to coronavirus .... it might be quicker if they listed what is still running
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
ACME supermarkets to install Plexiglas dividers between the cashier and customers at the checkout. I've seen enough Roadrunner cartoons to not even try to speculate what could possibly go wrong
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
I live in the NYC metro area, so I hear him every day as part of the news cycle, but is the rest of the nation listening to Gov. Cuomo's coronavirus news conferences? If not, we hear what everyone should be hearing from the government
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Philadelphia Inquirer)
 
 
 
Some sports franchises are giving employees full pay while they are out of work. Then there is the group that owns the Philadelphia 76ers and New Jersey Devils
source: inquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Here's a look at some financial assistance available to help during the coronavirus crisis. Probably not for you peons, but still
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(North Jersey)
 
 
 
Rugby team stranded in Andes, expected to start eating each other
source: northjersey.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 23, 2020
(SILive)
 
 
 
While toll takers between NY and NJ get to sleep in until further notice the Port Authority still wants their pound of coronavirus-free flesh
source: silive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
There's a winter storm coming to the Northeast, so make sure you... ummm... on second thought, never mind
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
NJ Governor about to take residents not abiding by his stay-at-home order to the socially distant woodshed
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Around the world, the elevator, the sleeper, walk the tightrope, the Dow, and other yo-yo moves you absolutely must learn
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Messy Nessy Chic)
 
 
 
Nessy found 13 more cool things on the interwab. Thanks, Nessy - we appreciate you
source: messynessychic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Mr and Mrs Fuchs had zero fuchs to give over the shutdown in NYC. Is the Cardinal gonna have a word or 5 with that priest? Youbetcha
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
According to the CDC, homemade coronavirus masks are to be used as a last resort. NJ hospitals want them anyway
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun March 22, 2020
(AlterNet)
 
 
 
Florida asks for and receives 100% of its coronavirus supplies, while New Jersey receives only 6% of asked-for supplies. Now what makes Florida so very special, one wonders
source: alternet.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The US Sun)
 
 
 
Trump talks openly about bailing out his own businesses. We need a corruption tag
source: the-sun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 21, 2020
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
You can sleep in on Monday, New Jersey
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 20, 2020
(ESPN)
 
 
 
New CBA allows sportsbooks in NFL stadiums. Fans of Colts, Bears, Giants, Jets, Steelers, Eagles, Lions, and Raiders to go broke first, with Broncos, Panthers, and Titans fans next
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
New Yorkers can sleep in Monday morning. Also,this is a good time to dust off your old 9/11 "New York Closed" memes or whatever they were called in 2001
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
This is NYC, STFU and take that shiat back to Italy
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SILive)
 
 
 
If kids are out of school indefinitely, why is New York City still using speed cameras in school zones?
source: silive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 19, 2020
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Lots of players expressing interest in joining Tom Brady now that it doesn't involve playing for hoodie
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Chris Christie thinks it's a "good thing" if Trump believes himself to be a "wartime president" in the fight against coronavirus. Trump, wearing Napoleon hat and going "Pew, pew pew" with miniatures, unavailable for comment
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(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Putting a face on how contagious coronavirus is: 3 out of 7 infected die...in one family
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(NJ.com)
 
 
 
If you've having buyer's remorse over that panic induced purchase of 247 cans of creamed eels and 139 cartons or corn nog, and you bought the stuff in Jersey, bon appetit
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Wed March 18, 2020
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
"The City that Never Sleeps" is about to get caught up on its rest, maybe read a few new books
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(USA Today)
 
 
 
It's like they are trying to get them sick?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Merkel: "Germany facing top challenge since WWII." You might want to rephrase that just a little
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Outline)
 
 
 
US citizens, let's not freak out about the coronavirus-induced martial law just yet. YET
source: theoutline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
How bad are things going to get in New York and California? Feds are dispatching Navy hospital ships
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Happy birthday to Queen Latifa. May your reign last another 50 years
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 17, 2020
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Good news for NJ college students who worried about going back to school to gather the possessions they left behind in their dorms when they thought they would be coming back from spring break
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(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Trumpvilles in the shadow of Trump Tower?
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
If you can get to Cranford, NJ there's a guy with 2000 pounds of corn beef and 30 barrels of beer he can't sell and ..... so much for social distancing
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Scenes from the bitter last calls at NYC bars where New Yorkers poured out their souls, left glass water rings on the counters because of the Coronavirus shutdown
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(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Boomer problems: Can I still receive unemployment compensation when I'm getting a severence package, pension and social security?
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
I wonder when they will figure out the US already IS Italy
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 29 Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Wolf orders shutdown of all non-essential businesses in Pennsylvania, warns residents to avoid grandma's house
source: fox29.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 16, 2020
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Parents suffering crippling anxiety from spending time with their children
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Chris Christie, on what Trump must do to reduce virus risk. And surprisingly, it's not "Shut down all the bridges"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
White House cancels annual Easter Egg Roll. Even the Easter Bunny is socially distancing himself from Donnie
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
NY, NJ and CT coordinate to close gyms, movie theaters, bars, casinos, sit down restaurants and gatherings over 50 people as of 8pm Monday night. Still can't agree on tolls
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(Business Insider)
 
 
 
President Not My Problem tells governors to get bootstrapy if you need pesky things like respirators
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(Gothamist)
 
 
 
With confirmed coronavirus cases nearing 1,000, New York Governor Cuomo lays out an emergency plan to build new hospitals. Unlike China who built one in 10 days, these will probably be finished in 2023 due to unions
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(MEL Magazine)
 
 
 
Here's a protip for you in these dark days of coronavirus hell: If you're going to order food delivered to you, tip really, really, really, REALLY well
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(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
The health care workers are getting COVID now? Welp, we're boned
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Brace yourself: the retail store closings are coming
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
New York City's closed. Statue of Liberty out front shoulda told ya
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun March 15, 2020
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Noted trendsetter in alcohol sales, Pennsylvania to close all liquor stores beginning Tuesday. This will surely be dealt with calmly across the state
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
So it begins. Hoboken, New Jersey, to impose Coronavirus curfew starting Monday
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 14, 2020
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Have you braved the hordes of toilet paper seeking shoppers? Share your stories and photos of the 2020 retail apocalypse
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(Slate)
 
 
 
If you haven't hit the store for panic buying yet, here's what's left
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
What's your pet's name, and what name do you really call them? Asking for a canine poochie-woochie bubbieboi cutie-pie
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Fri March 13, 2020
(NYPost)
 
 
 
NYC Mayor de Blasio says the city that never sleeps remains open for tourists, as long as you had no plans to go see a Broadway show, go to a museum, go to the opera, go to a sporting event, eat out, visit a dirty subway station
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(Fox Business)
 
 
 
Do 'roids weaken the immune system? Boost corona concerns?
source: foxbusiness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 12, 2020
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Despite having multiple contacts with associates who had contacts with people with CoronaVirus, and despite the Brazilians presidents press secretary having contracted it after hanging out at Mar-a-Lago last week, Trump will not get tested for it
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(Pix11)
 
 
 
Jersey City mayor announces a cornavirus curfew on bars and nightclubs to prevent people from gathering to drink their Coronas
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(NBC News)
 
 
 
Amid nationwide shortages, you can still find some hand sanitizer for sale at a NJ 7-Eleven. It was made by the store owner, and it caused severe burns on a couple of kids who used it, but still
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 11, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The Edge observation deck at Hudson Yards in NYC officially opens to the public. Now you can release your vertigo on the highest outdoor observation deck in the Western Hemisphere
source: newyorkyimby.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 10, 2020
(NYPost)
 
 
 
NY Governor Cuomo announces increase in covid19 cases and you know he's serious because he's using his "expression of serious alarm" face
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(NBC New York)
 
 
 
28 Weeks Later II is not filming in NY, however the NY National Guard is deploying to New Rochelle to set-up a containment area probably not for zombies but they always say that
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Pearl Jam postpones first leg of US tour over Coronavirus fears. They can't find a better plan
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
While other lesser bands cancel tours, King Crimson announces "The Court of the Coronavirus King" North American summer tour
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 09, 2020
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Manhattan woman tries to blow hot air up a judges arse, claims in a lawsuit that she was blown off her bicycle by an errant helicopter
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(CNBC)
 
 
 
The head of the NY/NJ Port Authority is feeling almost half the misery of the average person using the mass transit or airport system run by the Port Authority
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 07, 2020
(CNN)
 
 
 
Trump is going to need to fill the swamp with bleach. Coronavirus confirmed at CPAC
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Be sure to tell family members not to throw away original blueprints to iconic structures, especially the ones worth $250,000
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 06, 2020
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Good news NJ parents. Due to the coronavirus, teleschooling has been approved. Bet you really wish that legalized marijuana had been approved too
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(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
"The CDC got this right with H1N1 and Zika, and produced huge quantities of test kits that went around the country. I don't know what went wrong [with COVID-19]." - Thomas Frieden, CDC Director from 2009-2017
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Staten Island is pushing a vasectomy program, just not where you think
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Shaq is 48 today, won't say if all those candles are going on a cake or pizza
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 05, 2020
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Bernie Bro from 1968 has a message for Bernie Bros in 2020. TL,DR: Hold your nose
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Old photos of movie theaters in NJ, including the first drive-in movie theater
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(UPI)
 
 
 
New York state man completes five kendama spikes in under 30 seconds. No, really
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Everything is fine citizen, just the big banks all simultaneously telling their employees to work from home so they can "test out some routine contingency plans". For the next two weeks
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Magazine)
 
 
 
An Interview with 12 Morons
source: nymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Princetonian)
 
 
 
Marshawn Lynch selected to speak to Princeton students on Class Day. Presumably so he won't get fined
source: dailyprincetonian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
X's AI + Y's data = [$variable$] IP
source: medcitynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 04, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The cheapest internet is in New Jersey. But then you'll have to live in New Jersey
source: broadbandnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Nobody loves Mexican food quite like Arizona
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 03, 2020
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
25 things New Jersey people HATE about New Jersey
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Denver City Councilwoman: "If I do get Coronavirus I'm attending every MAGA rally I can"
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun March 01, 2020
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
These girls positively glowed in youth. Their graves sites will continue to glow for about 1,600 years
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat February 29, 2020
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Bloomberg is aggressively boring. "The first time I met him, he complained about soup"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri February 28, 2020
(Stamford Advocate)
 
 
 
I get that you "had a verbal altercation each time before deciding to spray the man on the third pass," but there's ways to repel someone away from you other than using bear repellent
source: stamfordadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu February 27, 2020
(Streetsblog)
 
 
 
Hoboken decides 20 is plenty
source: nyc.streetsblog.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Good news if you ever dreamed about sleeping inside a huge elephant at the Jersey Shore
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed News)
 
 
 
Coronavirus czar in 2000 on cigarettes: "Smoking doesn't kill"
source: buzzfeednews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed February 26, 2020
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Shark fin ban moving through Florida legislature with slow, creepy music
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Having nothing better to do, Trump decides to sue the New York Times over hurt fee fees. Discovery is going to be really interesting this time around
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The urban legend of gators in NYC sewers? It's not quite the croc you think it is
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue February 25, 2020
(CBS New York)