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headlines found matching 'IRS'
Tue April 24, 2018
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Watch Tom Hardy get the world's favorite symbiote right in the first official trailer for Venom
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 23, 2018
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Supreme Court 2010: Sentencing a juvenile to life in prison without parole violates the 8th amendment. Supreme Court 2017: Sentencing a juvenile to 240 years in prison with his first parole eligibility in 112 years? Yeah, that's totally fine
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun April 22, 2018
(Awful Announcing)
 
 
 
New Orleans Pelicans clown ESPN's army of NBA "experts" - all 22 of whom groupthinkingly predicted higher-seeded Portland Trailblazers would smoke them in first round
source: awfulannouncing.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(GQ)
 
 
 
The Department of Education is now allowed to ignore the first civil rights complaints a student files. They're also going to ignore students who file complaints multiple times
source: gq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Neil deGrasse Tyson, First Galatic Emperor of Earth, believes that asteroid mining will help prevent future wars and conflicts over access to terrestrial resources, once space becomes 'our' backyard
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Major League Baseball)
 
 
 
And we have our first no-hitter of 2018 ... and it's against the Red Sox
source: mlb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat April 21, 2018
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The reason the US strikes on Syria took so long to happen is that they needed to be cleared by upper management first
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Welcome to the first ever crossover Caturday/Woofday thread. Let's help the puppy people design a new Fark Tag for Woofday Wednesday, 'cause we're all helpful like that on Caturday. Link goes to Woofday Wetnose Wednesday Photoshop contest page
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 20, 2018
(Metro)
 
 
 
"How does cocaine affect my vagina?" First of all, you're doing it wrong
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vanity Fair)
 
 
 
Rachel Weisz and Daniel Craig are expecting their first baby together
source: vanityfair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Before you get excited about that $1 billion fine on Wells Fargo, consider: "Six big banks saved at least $3.59 billion in taxes in the first quarter of 2018, following the enactment of the GOP's tax-cut law in December". Yes, Wells IS one of the six
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
These 'Sea Nomads' are the closest thing to Aquaman, and they are the first known humans to be genetically adapted to diving
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Photos from inside Paisley Park. No need to cleanse yourself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka first (tag is for the chaps)
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 19, 2018
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Dozens of Muskoka chairs reported toppled over as 3.6 quake hits Ontario's wine and cottage country
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Here's Prince's original version of "Nothing Compares 2 U" revealed for the first time ever, thanks to his estate
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
For anyone in the cheap seats, when congressional Republicans say they haven't given any thought as to whether or not they'll endorse Trump in 2020, that means they absolutely will but would very much like to win back their own seats first
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Senator Duckworth decides to dress up her newborn as Blake Farenthold for her first trip to the Senate floor
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Donovan Mitchell of the Utah Jazz has set a record previously held by Michael Jordan, with 55 points in his first two playoff games, the most ever by a guard
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Hedge funds suffer their first back-to-back loss in two years. Awwwww
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
TESS's orbit is going to be the first of its kind, and this is a neat explanation of how and why. Rock on, you crazy diamond
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
It was an historic day for Ruth Bader Ginsburg as she got to issue her first maj--no, no, it's AN HISTORIC, not "a historic." Who taught you English, wolves? Seriously, check the vowel structure of historic and--dammit, I lost track of her milestone
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PRRI)
 
 
 
White evangelical support for Trump soars to 75 percent. Heck, a couple of more porn star affairs and he could run the table
source: prri.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 676: "The Upside Down". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 18, 2018
(STLToday)
 
 
 
White House is working on the Missouri governor's situation involving lawsuits, extramarital affairs, and alleged crimes because if there's one thing they know, it's how to make it all go away
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
All US flags lowered at half staff in honor of former First Lady Barbara Bush ... except at Trump's Mar-a-Lago because of reasons
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
The importance of the first few seconds in creating an iconic video game theme
source: news.avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Trump signed off on Syrian airstrikes and new sanctions on Russia on Friday, but he apparently changed his mind on the latter, AFTER Nikki Haley announced them. So he did what any real leader would do: Sent his TV friend out to throw her under the bus
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
On this date in 1938, the world met the Last Son of Krypton for the very first time. So, what do you get the Superman who has everything on his 80th birthday?
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Let's check out the story of the Washington Capitals puck girl, first-grader Keelan Moxley
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 17, 2018
(NPR)
 
 
 
Trump files for an extension on his taxes, needing more time to hide how much he's made off of being president
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Because of course the IRS website would go 503 on Tax Day
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Who Ate All The Pies)
 
 
 
So the first question is, how did you sneak the rooster into the stadium for your 'protest'?
source: whoateallthepies.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
"Coachella is a volatile setting where garments run a high risk of ruin by the elements or a rogue splash of hallucinogen- and dehydration-induced vomit." First World fashion problems
source: themuse.jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
When is a church not a church? Ask the IRS
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Anyone remember the first hour of BSG when the equipment all switched off when the war started? Well, you maaaaaay want to have off line back ups of everything
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 16, 2018
(Space.com)
 
 
 
Elon Musk is getting bored with those first stage landings, ups the ante to landing a second stage using a party balloon
source: space.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
For the first time in nearly a decade, the GOP are not talking about "repealing and replacing Obamacare." No, not because they already did so, but because they bungled their attempts so badly last year, it's now a subject they'd rather not discuss
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bleacher Report)
 
 
 
An American woman has won the Boston Marathon for the first time since the last time an elderly, addled Republican was in the White House
source: bleacherreport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun April 15, 2018
(Bleacher Report)
 
 
 
Deven Marrero jacks his first homer as a Diamondback--and is promptly called out for passing teammate on the basepaths
source: bleacherreport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Sub banned for hitting first graders. Sounds more dom to me
source: philadelphia.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
What really sucks about the world coming to a cataclysmic end a week from tomorrow is that the IRS won't accept that as an excuse to file your taxes late. Bunch of soulless bureaucrats, I tell ya
source: news.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Don't f*ck with high school students. Mike Pence's hometown had their first LGBT Pride parade
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat April 14, 2018
(Popsugar)
 
 
 
Hey look, it's another one of those "secrets no one knows about Disneyland" that everyone has known pretty much since the invention of the first dialup modem
source: popsugar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Troy Police Dept. welcomes the first member of its new Feline Unit. The new officer will be named via a contest with kids at Troy Public Schools, with Twitter users voting on the 4 finalists. Stay tuned for the 'Catty McCatface' thread on Caturday
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 13, 2018
(Standard Digital (Kenya))
 
 
 
Lady Maureen's tour for her debut album postponed for six months, because she, her band and backup dancers are all in jail for playing a gig in another country without first securing any sort of permits
source: standardmedia.co.ke   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Ok, so who broke the first rule about substitute teacher fight club?
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 12, 2018
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
The Minnesota Timberwolves are going to the playoffs for the first time since 2004, ending the longest playoff drought in the league
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NHL)
 
 
 
Hockey playoffs day 2, the other 10 teams play, just 5 can win, first pucks at 7pm ET
source: nhl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
11 senators to the FCC Chair: We feel that Sinclair Broadcasting's "must run" pieces are distorting the local news and violate FCC standards and request you open an investigation. Pai: nahhh they're all good bro, no need to check
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UEFA Champions League)
 
 
 
The 2nd leg of the Europa League is today. Arsenal travel to Moscow;Sporting Lisbon hosts Atlético Madrid;Salsburg has Lazio in town; andMarseille has RB Leipzig. Hosts all looking to overcome deficits from the first leg. All games kick off at 3:05ET
source: uefa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
What? Should we have taken our uniforms off first?
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Advice for recovering from running the Boston Marathon. Missing: Don't run a marathon in the first place
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 675: "Dogs vs Cats". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 11, 2018
(SB Nation)
 
 
 
Still looking for work, Eric Reid makes his first free agent visit of the offseason. Annnnnnnnd it's gone
source: sbnation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Americans may owe $25 billion in crypto taxes even though the Government doesn't recognize it as actual currency
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Let's dispel some common myths and deal some hard truths. I'll go first: "Red Velvet" is just chocolate and food coloring, ok?
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 10, 2018
(Tech Crunch)
 
 
 
Russian troll spotted at Facebook's Mark Zuckerberg's first of two hearings with Congress
source: techcrunch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Sports)
 
 
 
Sister Jean throws out first pitch at Cubs game. She put some mustard on it too
source: collegebasketball.nbcsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"It's the first witness the NFL has deposed in Kaepernick's complaint, marking a significant moment in the proceedings"
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
"Now teeing off..." you might hear at this year's Zurich Classic of New Orleans as each player approaches the first tee. Then LL Cool J's "Mama Said Knock You Out" blares over loudspeakers. Maybe one player will select "Hit Me With Your Best Shot"
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Possibly the first article in 170 years to use both "Necco wafers" and "panic buying"
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
How to tell if your spouse is having an affair and what you can do to prevent it from happening in the first place
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Major League Baseball)
 
 
 
Not news: Max Scherzer pitches a complete game, two-hit shutout, striking out 10. Much bigger news: He swipes the first stolen base of his career
source: mlb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 09, 2018
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
First CBO deficit estimate since the Republican tax and budget plan sees it rising sharply and topping $1 trillion in 2020
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Tammy Duckworth (D) becomes first Senator to give birth while in office. Figuratively speaking, of course
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
"Thousands of people have been fined in the months since VA, for the first time, imposed penalties on people who drive too slowly in the left lane." *insert grumpycat.gif* Now make the second offense mandatory jail time and we're getting somewhere
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Alert)
 
 
 
Which sleeping position you choose determines whether or not you'll feel rested according to the Institute of First World Problems
source: sciencealert.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun April 08, 2018
(NHL)
 
 
 
One last make up game and we actually need it to set the East playoff bracket. Panthers long odds were dashed yesterday but the Bruins are playing for home ice through the first three rounds, Puck drops at the Gahden at 7:30pm ET
source: nhl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
Patrick Reed hopes to continue the magic while Rory stalks and hopes he pulls a Rory. Will Rickie have a colorful victory. Tiger is already lost in the woods on the first hole and only 18 shots back. It's the Masters, online coverage now, televised coverage at 2pm ET on CBS
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 06, 2018
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Meet the Hughes brothers, America's future first family of hockey
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tucson.com)
 
 
 
First ever game under new MILB rules to speed up extra inning games goes about as well as you'd think
source: tucson.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
It only took 20 years to get here, but here it is (finally): the first trailer for the Man Who Killed Don Quixote
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
A tech start-up has proposed the world's first luxury space hotel. It'll only cost $10 million a person for a 12-day stay. Renderings show a room with a view
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
The first flight of the Space Shuttle is closer to World War II than to now
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Interesting: There are three movies about the Manson Family murders in the pipeline in Hollywood. Cool: The first one's a Tarantino movie. Oh, FFS: Starring Leonardo DiCaprio as Manson, if he can grow any facial hair
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press & Sun Bulletin)
 
 
 
Tim Tebow knocks one out for the Rumble Ponies...on his first pitch
source: pressconnects.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 05, 2018
(Baton Rouge Advocate)
 
 
 
Louisiana lawmaker opposed to a medical marijuana bill in her state cites a Daily Currant article to claim that 37 people overdosed on marijuana and died on its first day of legalization in Colorado. Unclear how many were named Becky
source: theadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Protip: If your storage locker is being sold at auction, maybe take the child porn out of it, first. Especially if you're the adult featured in it
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
AMC is awarded Saudi Arabia's first cinema license. Theaters will be segregated between men and women thus saving Saudi men from having to endure The Notebook or The English Patient
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Stevie Wonder sends out first tweet to pay tribute to MLK. Content of Tweet: "Fgij$%^pdf[a asr[ goj34 [sm# SH 3456y awxbhd69852198//-dfhg+=-,5 sp[goa]-9vbm aergb"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Rays centerfielder Kevin Kiermaier says he was planning to cover his entire body with Vaseline because of cold weather in NYC. It would be the first time a MLB player was covered with Vaseline since Gaylord Perry pitched
source: ftw.usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 674: "Squares 3". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 04, 2018
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
Brewers and Cardinals combine for first ever Major League game to start and end with two home runs
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
Video
 
In first at-bat in the majors, Shohei Ohtani hits three-run homer. Teammates troll him in best way possible
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NFL)
 
 
 
Rams trade their first-round pick to the Patriots for Brandin Cooks to replace Sammy Watkins
source: nfl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 03, 2018
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Monthly membership to Ancestry.com: $19.99. First class postage for sending in your DNA sample: $2.66. Discovering your biological father is your parents' fertility doctor: Priceless
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Herbal salmonella supplements earn the dubious Hero tag for becoming the first mandatory food recall by the FDA
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kare11)
 
 
 
Somebody broke the first rule of Daycare Fight Club
source: kare11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Now that the First Lady Melania's parents got their brand new green cards, the Trump administration starts to work on legislation aimed at closing immigration "loopholes". Tax loopholes still ok though
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
How not to cheat on your taxes-a handy guide
source: uk.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Even when we're not eating anything, the Milky Way is still growing in size. For the first time, we know by how much
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Dutch lawyer sentenced to jail, fined $20,000 for lying to Robert Mueller's team. Is first person to be sentenced in Mueller's investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 election
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
London restaurant serves 12-foot long noodles. Do not order on a first date
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dealbreaker)
 
 
 
That guy who was an accountant a few hours before the game, then got his first win as an NHL goalie? He didn't get paid one cent
source: dealbreaker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 02, 2018
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Zuckerberg thinks that creating an independent body like the Supreme Court to oversee Facebook could be the solution to their problems. First case to be heard will be Zuck vs. United States
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
Roger Stone called Nunberg a lying asshole and psycho earlier this week for claiming that Stone communicated with Julian Assange. You have three guesses as to what's in this article and the first two don't count
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SF Weekly)
 
 
 
If you are looking for erotic art and implements, or vintage dental and gynecological chairs, Kink.com's Armory is selling everything April 6-10
source: sfweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SpaceX)
 
 
 
Here we go again - SpaceX launches a previously used first stage and Dragon capsule from Florida to the ISS with supplies and experiments. No first stage landing - they're doing high-stress maneuvers and tests. Launch at 4:08 EDT
source: spacex.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Indy100)
 
 
 
How powerful are high school students becoming? One just organized the first-ever gay parade in Mike Pence's hometown
source: indy100.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Trek Movie)
 
 
 
Discovery becomes first Star Trek show since Next Generation to be nominated for a Hugo Award in its first season. Next Generation's first season was nominated for a Hugo Award?
source: trekmovie.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
First 2019 Corvette ZR1 gets put on the dyno to see its top speed. (w/ fast and furious video)
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
First games for new Phillies manager Gabe Kapler continue to be beyond weird as he uses 21 pitchers in 28 innings ... including calling for a reliever who never warmed up
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun April 01, 2018
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Biologist tries to make glowing green beetles with 10 pairs of wings. For science, not for pranks
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
The Las Vegas Golden Knights have now won the division in every season of existence. In a more bittersweet moment before the game, they also retired their first number
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Amidst all the Twitter ravings against Amazon, someone had to step back and ask the obvious question: why are we defending Amazon in the first place?
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 31, 2018
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
"He insisted on fast food for our first date. Then he pulled out coupons"
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Seattle's "first-come, first-served" rental law is an unconstitutional taking, says King County Superior Court Judge
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 30, 2018
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
You know, if the heights of your criminal enterprise consist of stealing three boxes of cigarillos from a gas station, you probably don't need to bother with the whole 'waving the gun around first' bit
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Guess what Cheeto-colored, combover-wearing, fat fark of a corrupt president went golfing first thing this morning for (by some estimates) his 73rd time during his first year in office? Go on, guess. Or did I give too many hints?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Irish Catholic churches to have lines for the confession booth going out the doors after pubs around the country open their doors for pints on Good Friday for the first time in 91 years
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
EPA Chief Scott Pruitt doesn't just fly his security detail in first class, he also took them on multiple vacations including a trip to Disneyland
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
UCF student deported to China over 'disturbing behavior,' including buying guns, not going to class, attending UCF in the first place
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Elmer J. Fudd)
 
 
 
What part of the bunny do you eat first?
source: delicious.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Scott Foster was an accountant a few hours before the game, then he got his first win as an NHL goalie
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
And now, the first pitch from Derek Jeter's new-look Marlins...*CRACK*...welp, there goes that one
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Helen Hunt gives update on 'Mad about You' reboot. Although most viewers were satisfied when the network gave it the boot the first time
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 29, 2018
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Seattle startup company offers chairs that can double as bulletproof vests, perfect for when you're tired of running from gunfire and just want to sit down for a moment
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Milo Youknowipocketedthis's charity for white men closes amid questions about which white man it benefited other than himself
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Another day of madness and stupidity in this nightmare timeline, and Subby's not feeling terribly clever tonight. MSNBC Thirsty Thursday discussion thread. Festivities begin at 8pm EDT, bring a helmet
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Sea of Thieves experiences first wave of in-game acts of theft and piracy
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
First Lady may be First Lady to be First Lady Gone Girl
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Westworld's first official full season 2 trailer is now live, full of robot mayhem to Nirvana's Heart Shaped Box
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Uber and Lyft are causing regular New York cab drivers to commit suicide. Judd Hirsch and Robert DeNiro are on 24 hour supervision
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Starbucks opens its first coffee shop in a U.S. national park. Company says it's part of their 4 F's philosophy of fresh air, flora, fauna, and Frappucino
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 673: "What the L?". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 28, 2018
(Major League Baseball)
 
 
 
We almost made it through spring training without a wacky non-baseball-related injury. ALMOST. Durable Royals catcher Salvador Perez out 4-6 weeks with torn MCL (carrying luggage upstairs)
source: mlb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsChannel 5 Nashville)
 
 
 
Tennessee State Rep David Byrd on sexual assault allegations: "First, let me say that I have done nothing wrong or inappropriate during my term as state representative for the 71st District"...and it goes downhill from there
source: newschannel5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Giants asking for at least two first-round picks for headcase Odell Beckham Jr. Good luck with that
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Republicans: Sure anger at Trump SEEMS to be creating a building "Blue Wave" for 2018, but once voters see the bigger paychecks our tax bill caused, they'll settle right down. Most Voters: WHAT bigger paycheck?
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 26 Milwaukee)
 
 
 
"In 1885 the first hamburger was made right here in Seymour, Wisconsin and we have indisputable evidence to prove that"
source: nbc26.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Ireland to open first official nude beach in case you like to watch old pasty people
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
First World Problems: Should you fly commercial or private with your pet?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Good news, everybody. The Potomac River cleanup efforts have been so successful that it's now safe to swim in it again. So, go ahead. No, seriously, you can go first. Yeah, I'll be right behind you. Go on, it's cool
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
First, they came for the antique lighthouse lenses, and I said nothing
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Eight (Arizona PBS))
 
 
 
Arizona's first vegan-only grocery store opens in Glendale. Much like Arizona's first NHL hockey team, also in Glendale, interest expected to be minimal
source: cronkitenews.azpbs.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Sammy Hagar fronting Van Halen for the very first time. Farm Aid 1985. FF to 6:45 to see his intro to "I Can't Drive 55" (NSFW)
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 27, 2018
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
It takes at least 25 times for Han to shoot first
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
In case you haven't noticed -- and judging by general interest in chess, you haven't -- an American just won the right to challenge for the World Championship for the first time since 1972*
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
US Census 2020 will include, for the first time since 1950, a question about citizenship. Good thing people aren't legally required to answer
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
If you're going to give your kid money for a tattoo, first of all, you've probably made some bad life choices; second of all, make sure he doesn't buy an AR-15 so he could shoot up a school
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 26, 2018
(Vanity Fair)
 
 
 
First interview in over a decade with the CEO of Sears shows he doesn't understand a thing he's done wrong up to this point
source: vanityfair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Frontman for Eagles of Death Metal says "As the survivor of a mass shooting I can tell you from first-hand experience that all of you protesting and taking days off from school insult the memory of those who were killed and abuse and insult me"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
$568,000 of unpaid taxes to the IRS puts Courtney Love in a hole
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
The Process must be working, as the Philadelphia 76ers have clinched their first playoff spot since 2012 and their first winning season since 2005
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun March 25, 2018
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Will Texas Tech raid Villanova and go to their first Final Four? Will Duke suck against Kansas? Will the games be as exciting if not more exciting compared to Saturday? Coverage begins at 2pm EDT on CBS
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
First direct flight from Australia to London touches down, almost overcomes language barrier
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
First nonstop flight between Australia and Europe - 17 hours in the air - takes off this weekend. Wear comfortable clothes
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 24, 2018
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
CDs, vinyl outselling digital dowloads for first time in 7 years. In other news, Myspace, Friendster, gaining new members using CompuServe
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
National Security Adviser John Bolton has declared his first war and it's against the entire staff of the National Security Council. Like fish in a barrel
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NHL)
 
 
 
12, 12 NHL games today, ah ha ha ha ha. Only two hockey Saturdays left in the regular season, so every game is important. Except for the ones that aren't, you know who you are. First faceoff @ 3pm ET. STIFLE YOURSELF, PIERRE
source: nhl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
First Iraqi-made film in 25 years hits cinemas. Let's hope it's not a bomb
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Lessons learned from the first school shooting in the U.S., which occurred in 1853
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Australian volunteers save 5 of over 150 stranded whales. Because it's Down Under, a shark warning has been issued, and officials are now worrying about the impending invasion of spiders, snakes, crocodiles, toxic flora, and bloodthirsty koalas
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
No fooling, the sky may fall April first. Break out your hydrazine straws: free rocket fuel may be available
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 23, 2018
(The Intercept)
 
 
 
Trump's new National Security Advisor chairs a group infamous for its role in publishing fake news and spreading hate about Muslims. I mean, at this point, what else did you expect?
source: theintercept.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Silicon Republic)
 
 
 
Scientists stunned to capture first mating footage of bizarre anglerfish, but not as stunned as the anglerfish was when it realized its mating was being filmed
source: siliconrepublic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
Trump is getting rid of all his generals and replacing them with Fox News tough guys because the generals were insufficiently bloodthirsty and belligerent and wanted to try diplomatic channels and negotiation before moving to military confrontations
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sports Illustrated)
 
 
 
With Kentucky losing for the first time ever to K-state, the NCAA Tournament now has its first ever 9 vs 11 match-up in the Elite Eight. Duke sucks
source: si.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MovieWeb)
 
 
 
First victim of gun confiscation: Han Solo
source: movieweb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Republican House panel finds no collusion, which is not surprising since they never went looking for it in the first place. oh, hey - they DID find a LOT of people leaking EVIDENCE of collusion tho, so there's that
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Indeed, Dietbitcoin - though sharing virtually all of Bitcoin's technical specifications - is the first cryptocurrency that is not a scam." - Brother of Drug Kingpin Pablo Escobar
source: ccn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
"OK, let's start your driving test. First, put the car in drive and... FAIL"
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 22, 2018
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
I'm sure Colin Kaepernick would be getting plenty of looks at QB this off season if it wasn't for all the top-level blue chip talent ahead of him to check out first
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Today's news in The Termite Wars- Termite colonies send their elderly termites to die first
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Trumpy wants scalps and trade wars, Nader was evidently granted immunity before turning rabbit, and Rick Wilson is now aware of fark's love of grapefruit jokes. MSNBC Thirsty Thursday Discussion thread, fun starts 8pm EDT, bring a helmet
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Smithsonian Magazine)
 
 
 
Larry Kwong, the first athlete of Asian heritage to play in an NHL game, dies at 94
source: smithsonianmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Video of smoking baby results in mother's arrest. No word if she at least give him a dry rub first
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
For the first time in history, the phrase "Count Dankula convicted for Nazi pug antics" actually means something
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
James Comey weighs film and TV offers for his memoirs. Finally a movie about an FBI director that won't need staff from both the men's and women's wardrobe departments
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 672: "Angels". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 21, 2018
(CNN)
 
 
 
Meghan Markle to receive first wax job prior to Harry wedding
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Syfy)
 
 
 
Superman's homeworld gets the ultimate prequel treatment, and we think you'll have an El of a good time. It's the first issue, er, episode of "Krypton" 10 PM ET on SyFy
source: syfy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Scott Pruitt has spent $105,000 on first-class flights since assuming post, extra $5,000 was reportedly spent on creating a giant middle finger attachment that will point towards America while plane is in the air
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Not only is John Oliver's bunny book handily outselling Mike Pence's bunny book, it's sold out its entire first printing
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Your First Bracket is a Dumpster Fire? You have a second chance to fail further. PSW= Drew
source: games.espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Awful Announcing)
 
 
 
The internet has spoken and is strikingly complimentary about March Madness game announcers so far, believed to be a first for any TV sport. Boo-yah
source: awfulannouncing.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 20, 2018
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Dairy Queen is giving away free ice cream on March 20th for the first day of spring. Northeast is like "What spring?"
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
First look at George R.R. Martin's 'Nightflyers,' a space horror series for Syfy. It's 'Psycho in space.' No, it's 'Alien with a ghost.' No wait, it's 'The Shining in space.' The producers literally call it all of these things
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Trump says "It's going to be hard to get rid of us" in today's "You should read the article first" headline
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Rebekah Mercer decides to die on the Cambridge Analytica hill before tonight's "So You Wanna Rig an Election?" episode airs
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Well at least one man will survive the coming nuclear war, being that he's got 200 pairs of underwear and some other supplies in his bunker he's been building for the last two decades
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 19, 2018
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Kushner Co.: "Okay, okay. We met with Qatar to discuss financing our misbegotten real estate ventures. But that was it. We never took their money, we swear." Narrator: Just like Jared was entirely truthful on his SF-86 the first time filling it out
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Now for the low low price of $10 to $20 you can have some of Guy Fieri's goatee or bleached-blonde head hairs named after yourself or a special someone. No word on paying just a little extra will get one of the short and curly ones named
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Tom Brady cheats on Wait, Wait...Don't Tell Me, will not be allowed to participate in the first 4 episodes of next season
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
RuPaul is the first drag queen to get a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame... or is he? BUM BUM BUMMMM
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun March 18, 2018
(The Hill)
 
 
 
#1. How were you able to lose money running a casino?; #2. How small are your hands?; #3a. Do you know what a tailor is?; #3b. A hairstylist?; #4. What does Putin have for breakfast?
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Old and Busted: Get this man a shield. New Hotness: Get this man a film editing job. Awesome 8 minute clip tribute to the first decade of the Marvel Cinematic Universe
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Esquire)
 
 
 
Pretty much every band and singer has done it at least once, though some have done it a lot better then others, and some have done it even better than those who did it first. We're talking cover songs, this week on the Sunday Morning Music Club
source: esquire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 17, 2018
(Daily Voice)
 
 
 
Jets fans sue team over seat-license changes, but not for being a laughingstock for the better part of 50 years. Dave from Massapequa, long time listener first time farker, weighs in to the right what with Francesa being retired and all
source: eastdutchess.dailyvoice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
World's first topless-optional cruise to set sail. Customers line up two-abreast
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Not News: UConn women outscore the 16 seed in the first quarter. Fark.com: UConn's first quarter was higher than St. Francis's total score in route to a record 140 points
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pro Football Talk)
 
 
 
Even in a league known for rapid turnover, it's a bit eye-opening to consider that at least half of the teams in the NFL could have a different starting quarterback this year than they did in the first week of 2017
source: profootballtalk.nbcsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Coming Soon)
 
 
 
It only took six hours for Avengers: Infinity War to set a record for first day advance ticket sales
source: comingsoon.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 16, 2018
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Day Two of the First Round of the NCAA Basketball Tournament continues. How is your bracket looking? What big upsets will we see? Tip-off is at 12:15pm EDT on CBS with Providence-Texas A&M starting this awesome day
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Things suck all over right now, so here's video of a baby penguin taking its first swim at the Tulsa Zoo
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 15, 2018
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Beware The Ides of Mueller: Trump Organization is subpoenaed. Thirsty Thursday has a high probability of a Twitler meltdown. Grab your beverage of choice, fasten your seatbelts, and hold on to your butts. MSNBC Discussion thread starts at 8PM EDT
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Subby's pretty certain spaghetti sauce isn't arsonists' first choice of accelerant to start house fires
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Now that the First Four games are over we move into the real action of the NCAA Tournament. Who will be the victim in a big upset? Will Davidson or Kentucky win in the battle of Wildcats? The games tip-off at 12:15pm EDT on CBS
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Streetsboro gun thief pleads guilty to having the most interesting hairstyle you'll see today
source: record-courier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Porn star wants to be the first to shoot a film having sex with a robot. Actresses who have worked with Keanu Reeves immediately say it's already been done
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 671: "Up & Down 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 14, 2018
(Next Big Future)
 
 
 
The world's first 3d printed "house" was completed in 24 hours and cost only $4,000. You wouldn't download a "house" would you?
source: nextbigfuture.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
The second set of the First Four games is upon us. Will Texas Southern cruise to a win? Or will NC Central have their way? Will Syracuse level the Devils? Or will Arizona State grind the rind? Tip-off is at 6:40pm EDT on TruTV
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NASA)
 
 
 
"For the first time, scientists had ground and satellite views of Steve. Scientists have now learned, that Steve may be an extraordinary puzzle piece in painting a better picture of how Earth's magnetic fields function." ALL HAIL STEVE
source: nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Former FBI Director Andrew McCabe: I will retire March 18th. Sessions: Not if we fire you first
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Check out the first cannabis-friendly fitness facility in the world: "we do cannabis infused group fitness classes which is yoga, kickboxing and other classes all here"
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Monterey County Weekly)
 
 
 
"Welcome to the firearms safety class. Now before we start, let's go over the most important thing you need to remember: When handling any firearm, you must always first make sure that it is not ... *BLAM* ... oh, sorry"
source: montereycountyweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 13, 2018
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Baltimore Orioles become first MLB team to take steps against aging fan base by letting kids attend games for free
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
This week in 1988, everyone in America got RickRolled for the first time
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 12, 2018
(Irish Mirror)
 
 
 
Good Friday to be Better Friday in Ireland for the first time in 90 years after pubs will be allowed to stay open late
source: irishmirror.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(iNews (UK))
 
 
 
Legion's second season will be just as restrained as the first. Cue sci-fi landscapes, people-swallowing orbs and Jemaine Clement waving his hands in the air like he just don't care
source: inews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun March 11, 2018
(WAPT Jackson)
 
 
 
News: Small Mississippi town gets its first African-American female mayor. Fark: Town aldermen vote to cut her salary 75%
source: wapt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 10, 2018
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Nunberg gives his first post-meltdown interview ... and says it's not a witch hunt
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
Heels or 'Hoos? Upstart Friars or domineering Wildcats? And will the damned giant meteor just take out the Pac-12 already? 13 championship games, 12 tourney semifinal. It's your College Tourney Weekend thread. First games start at 11am ET
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Mattel: Hirsute doesn't suit her
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(11 Alive)
 
 
 
IRS scammers pick the wrong number to run their con on. Jailarity hopefully to ensue
source: 11alive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 09, 2018
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Here's what is known about the shipwreck unearthed by a nor'easter in Maine. It's a shipwreck. Also, quit taking "souvenirs"
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Gary Cohn being considered "first relevant White House departure" hurts Spiceweasel's feelings. Mongoose hopefully available for snarky comment
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"This is the first generation that has refused to grow up, and they think they can still drink like they did when they were young." And there seems to be just one thing that can break that habit
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 08, 2018
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Trade war activated, Stormy weather, and a mystery anouncement about North Korea. Just another Thirsty Thursday in the MSNBC Discussion thread. Grab a shot and a beer and join us at 8PM EST
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Larry Sabato has released his latest "Crystal ball" forecast, and moved 26 house races in favor of Democrats: "For the first time fewer than 218 GOP seats are rated "likely" and all Dem incumbents' races are now rated at least "likely"
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Secretary of Veterans Affairs is kicking ass and taking names to fix some of the many issues at the VA. He'll reward himself with a trip to Wimbledon for the effort
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 670: "Low Key 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 07, 2018
(Metro)
 
 
 
The 'world's first crowdfunded craft beer hotel' is set to open this summer in Columbus, Ohio ...with a tap in each overnight room. Where do I send all my beer money for reservations?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Filming your son's first bike ride or the first time he went on a date is all good, filming his 'first bong' not so much
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Hidden economic indicator of the day: Lego sales fell for the first time in 13 years
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 06, 2018
(CNN)
 
 
 
The latest reality show, "Tough love: NAFTA edition", is announcing its first season
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Teacher suspended for stockpiling 750 pairs of panties at his high school, which he claims were not swiped from students but bought online for purposes of reselling at school's culture festival. This story passes the sniff test
source: soranews24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Yusuf, 14, wants to be the first Muslim US President. However, without any extramarital affairs, conflicts of interests, or racially charged language that seeks to belittle and divide the nation, it's going to be a hard sell
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Thousands of highchairs recalled due to risk of suddenly becoming low chairs
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Netflix reveals the first full trailer for the "Lost in Space" reboot which feels a bit like "'Lost' Except in Space." Also: Producer explains the big changes from the original
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
Daycare workers make kids' naptime extra special by handing out gummy bears laced with melatonin first. Sweet dreams, you little bastards
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 05, 2018
(Channel News Asia)
 
 
 
It's been 65 years since the death of Stalin, and Russians are trying to rehabilitate the image of the bloodthirsty dictator whose tactics were as bad as Hitler's
source: channelnewsasia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spaceflight Now)
 
 
 
Stay up late for the 50th launch of a Falcon 9, as SpaceX lofts a comms satellite from Florida. Launch scheduled for 12:30 am EST, 9:30 pm on the west coast. It's a heavy bird, so first-stage recovery is iffy
source: spaceflightnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The first time anyone has ever admitted that the beef injection leads to a positive test
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
Internet engineers have spotted what may be the first case of an IPv6-based DDOS attack (which means that someone actually bothered to set up IPv6)
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Pilot survives small plane crash in Enumclaw, is reportedly alert and talking to first responders, which puts him ahead of most locals
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Italy edges towards hung parliament, as many Americans look on wistfully, wishing they could hang theirs
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun March 04, 2018
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
For the first time in history a question in a headline turns out to be true
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Magazine)
 
 
 
If you volunteered your computers's unused computing power to Einstein@Home then congratulations you helped discover the first radio-quiet gamma-ray millisecond pulsar ever found
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Sat March 03, 2018
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Baby's first birthday should include family, friends, cake and a a extra dry Manhattan with extra vermouth. Wait, maybe skip that last one
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(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Before you test drive your next car, you might want to just go ahead and pop the trunk first and have a look. Just sayin'
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(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Jeopardy just had its first tiebreaker in its 45-year history
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Fri March 02, 2018
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle will invite "ordinary people" to the wedding. So it seems Judd Hirsch and Donald Sutherland will be attending, though the absence of Mary Tyler Moore will still resonate
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Thu March 01, 2018
(The Hill)
 
 
 
It only took them 4 years, but Exxon Mobil Corp. is finally ending ties with some of its joint ventures with Russia's state-owned oil company, citing western sanctions first imposed in 2014
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(CNN)
 
 
 
Scientists have detected traces of the earliest light in the universe. "This is the first time we've seen any signal from this early in the Universe, aside from the afterglow of the Big Bang"
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(MSNBC)
 
 
 
H.R. Pufnstuf on his way out, Mueller about to lower the boom on the Russian hackers, and Georgia hates the free market if it hurts the fee-fees of the NRA. Thirsty Thursday in the MSNBC Discussion thread. Booze highly recommended. Starts at 8PM EST
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(The Hill)
 
 
 
Ben Carson: "Was that wrong? Should I have not done that? I tell you, I gotta plead ignorance on this thing because if anyone had said anything to me at all when I first started here that that sort of thing was frowned upon, you know"
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(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Apparently, all that stuff about firing Sessions got Trump lots of investigation brownie points from Mueller. Unfortunately, brownie points in Mueller world equals jail time. Trump likes to be first so he'll be the first ex Pres in jail
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(USA Today)
 
 
 
Good news and bad news; First, the good- the new 5G phones are coming Now, the bad- not until next year, and they're gonna be a mite spendy
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(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Remember young CO couple who sold everything, moved to FL, bought sailboat to cruise Caribbean, sank it the first sailing day? They bought a bigger boat
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(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 669: "Geometry 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed February 28, 2018
(Health Throuoghfare)
 
 
 
Radio astronomers for first time transcribe signals from initial stars of our early Universe: D-R-I-N-K M-O-R-E O-V-A-L-T-I-N-E
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(Twitter)
 
 
 
Trump tweets off his rocker, Kosher Kush is two steps away from removal (unless arrested first), and the Mueller probe is breaking fast and hard. THIS is your mid-week Trump scandal rumor/speculation thread (~5pm news dump)
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(Fark)
 
 
 
"It would not be amiss for the novice to write the last paragraph of his story first, once a synopsis of the plot has been carefully prepared - as it always should be." --H. P. Lovecraft. This is your Fark Writer's Thread, reverse edition
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(Yahoo)
 
 
 
LeBron James became the first NBA player in history to reach 30K points, 8K rebounds and 8K assists. No word on how close he is to reaching Wilt's 20K
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(MSN)
 
 
 
U.S. history trivia your teachers never taught you in school. Because we all have a thirst to learn
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(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Lounge chairs are everywhere. They're everywhere, and my HUD procures them. Lounge chairs are everywhere. They're everywhere, and my HUD procures them for me. Only for me
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Tue February 27, 2018
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
First Lady calls for adults to promote values of "encouragement, kindness, compassion, and respect" online. That's the joke
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(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Jerome Powell, Trump's new Fed chair, tries to portray a smooth transition in his first testimony in front of Congress but instead flubs his message and sends the stock market falling. Only the best people
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(Some Untraceable Guy)
 
 
 
Coinbase may have handed your data to the IRS; contact lawyer, or self report for more details
source: coindesk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon February 26, 2018
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
Man charged with murder after using an assault frying pan--thoughts and prayers first, but it's too soon to talk about frying pan control
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Arctic storm brings snowfall to Rome for the first time since MMXII, or VI years
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Alaska Dispatch News)
 
 
 
It's a sad state of affairs when the Olympics take Russian cheating more seriously than the United States
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Sun February 25, 2018
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
'Mullet's not a hairstyle, it's a lifestyle'
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Sat February 24, 2018
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Touchdown squirrel takes up snowboarding, is now squirrelkind's first two sport athlete
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(ESPN)
 
 
 
Ester Ledecka becomes first Olympian to win a gold model in snowboarding and ski
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(Billboard)
 
 
 
Because when you think of Prince, the first thing that comes to mind is ... cooking?
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(NYPost)
 
 
 
"I actually rarely have sex without getting high these days." Submitter can only attest to the first five words
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Fri February 23, 2018
(BGR)
 
 
 
For those who guessed 'AT&T' as the first company to exploit the death of net neutrality, come claim your prize
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(Mashable)
 
 
 
Infowars has received its first fake news strike from YouTube, who are trying to crack down on crackpots. Those next two strikes should be any minute now. YouTube must have just started issuing strikes
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(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Paul Manafort's inability to figure out how to convert a Word Document to PDF is one of the things that helped bring him down
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(MSN)
 
 
 
Neanderthals, the world's first misunderstood artists, at least according to the world's first Neanderthal critic
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Thu February 22, 2018
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
A swarm of incontinent howler monkeys descend on Maryland, Trumpy's concerned about violent media, and Mueller drops another 2-ton bag of hammers on Manafort and Gates. MSNBC Discussion thread, Thirsty Thursday edition, festivities begin at 8pm EST
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Parent decides to write up a social media contract in order for her 9-year-old to responsibly utilize his device, but she wanted to find the "trouble spots" first. It didn't take long. Are you developing these contracts for your children?
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(Forbes)
 
 
 
Walmart heirs lose $15 billion after stock prices fall, may soon face the ultimate embarrassment of having to shop at Walmart
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(CNN)
 
 
 
We can all can fly in First class dirt cheap
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 668: "It's a Technicality 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
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Wed February 21, 2018
(AL.com)
 
 
 
For everyone who said, "Where did all these women go after the election?" the answer is: "nowhere." Leigh Corfman, the first woman to come forward and accuse Roy Moore of misconduct, is still pursuing a defamation suit VERY actively against Moore
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(The Japan News)
 
 
 
To fund tourism programs and deter problem gamblers, Japan may charge ¥2000 admission fee to enter nation's first licensed casinos. You can't win if you don't pay
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(PJ Media)
 
 
 
2004 presidential screamer Howard Dean: House Intelligence Committee Chairman Devin Nunes "belongs in JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIL" because he doesn't put the country first like former President Obama did
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(Spaceflight Now)
 
 
 
SpaceX has an early morning show for Best Coasters, launching a radar satellite and their first 2 prototype Internet satellites from Vandenberg. Instantaneous launch window at 6:16 am PST, 9:16 am in the east, no first-stage recovery (Launch rescheduled to February 21st)
source: spaceflightnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Right Wing Watch)
 
 
 
Focus on the Family declares itself a church, avoiding those pesky IRS deductions
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(WTVR)
 
 
 
5th grader saves choking friend - at first his parents said they thought he meant he saved a life when playing a video game
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Tue February 20, 2018
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Ah, the Winter Olympics. Where every four years, everyone becomes an expert at curling, people marvel as lunatics hurtle themselves headfirst down a narrow chute at 80 mph, and someone, somewhere, is outraged about the judging in figure skating
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Mon February 19, 2018
(Vulture)
 
 
 
Star Trek: Discovery just pulled off a shockingly good first season
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(NBC Olympics)
 
 
 
Tonight; there's men's hockey playoffs with USA playing first, women skiing in the halfpipe for medals, couples dancing on ice for medals, and overnight; women's bobsled and short track skating. 7pm EST start on the usual outlets
source: nbcolympics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rocketnews 24)
 
 
 
"Dear sirs, there may be just a little bit of mold on my senbei cracker. I am sending it back." "Dear customer: [multipage essay of apology and supplication accompanied by documentation and results of our FTIR analysis]. Have a free packet on us"
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(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Not only can cockroaches resist pesticides, survive nuclear blasts, and live for days without a head, they also get stronger when they crash headfirst into walls
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Sun February 18, 2018
(Twitter)
 
 
 
And the first witness has hit the Trump Russian Collusion pleasure palace and campaign headquarters
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(Guardian)
 
 
 
Paramedic ants observed triaging, giving first aid and antibiotics to ants maimed in epic termite wars, mainlining powdered sugar to keep up their strength
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(Pro Football Talk)
 
 
 
Mets G.M. thinks Tim Tebow will be the first person to have played in both the NFL and MLB since Drew Henson
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(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Ignoring calls for gun control, avoiding listening to victims of gun violence, and giving a thumbs-up while taking photos with first responders is hard work; that's why Trump had to go to a bacchanalian disco party at Mar-a-Lago last night
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(MSN)
 
 
 
How the "America First" trade policy could lead to a trade war ... and make Kentucky Bourbon and Wisconsin Cheese much more expensive. Yeah, that should go over well in Trump country
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(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"These Trump supporters, they're not conservatives," said Bill Maher. "They're Drew Barrymore in '50 First Dates.' If you lose your memory every night, it all starts to make sense"
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Sat February 17, 2018
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Wales suffers "massive" 4.4 magnitude earthquake, the strongest in 100 years. At least two chairs toppled. Thoughts and prayers for Omarion
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(Slate)
 
 
 
National Enquirer bought Playboy playmate's Trump story so the CEO could "influence" Trump in the future. Otherwise known as blackmail, the whole reason why secret affairs are bad from an FBI point of view
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(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
New teaser for Cobra Kai. STRIKE FIRST STRIKE HARD NO MERCY
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(NHL)
 
 
 
The NHL is still in full swing during the Winter Olympics (fark a whole plethora of people on that). 11 games today starting with the Kings out east coast and ending with the Bruins out west. First puck drops @ 1pm ET. Pierre's in Pyeongchang
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(UPI)
 
 
 
Problem: a large number of your staff can't get a permanent security clearance. Solution: change the rules, obviously. But hey, don't be too blatant about it, make sure to call it a "review" first
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Fri February 16, 2018
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Florida Fire Chief caught faking two full time jobs. Also faked certifying "first responder" classes that he had faked teaching. Is known to spend considerable time working community outreach at a local establishment which employ mostly single moms
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(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Most punchable face on Fox News gives first response to Russia indictments: Blame Obama
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(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Mueller drops a double dose of indictments to lead us into President's day. 13 Russians and 1 American are in the crosshairs. Trump says NO COLLUSION. It's FRESH HELL FRIDAY in the MSNBC Discussion Thread. Sobriety not recommended. Fun starts @ 8 EST
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston Post and Courier)
 
 
 
It appears the drones have scored their first helicopter
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(Vice)
 
 
 
New game on Steam offers 1 Bitcoin to the first person to solve the puzzle. Nothing said about how many Bitcoin they expect to earn with embedded miners running on thousands of computers
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(Charlotte Observer)
 
 
 
First serious Panthers bidder emerges
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(CBR)
 
 
 
Walking Dead to feature its first desperate-for-ratings stunt
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(Steam Powered)
 
 
 
More popular than that narcoleptic bard you rolled last week it's the Friday Fark Gaming Thread. Link goes to the Steam Lunar New Year sale. What have you been playing? On a side note what's the first game you remember buying with your own money?
source: store.steampowered.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu February 15, 2018
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
In a classic case of American exceptionalism, 70 years after Charles Cohen escaped death by hiding in a closet to escape one of the first mass murders in the U.S., his granddaughter hides in a closet to escape a mass murderer and survives. Freedumb
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(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Now is not the time to talk about gun control because Two Scoops thinks immigrants are scary. Thirsty Thursday MSNBC Discussion thread. Get the booze flowing for 8PM EST
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Some geeks restored a 1959 IBM 1401 and managed to get a Fortran compiler running on it. Come for the punch card stack. Stay for the cryptic red lights. No word on how long it took to compile the first pr0n image displayed on greenbar paper
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(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Minke whale gets world's first whalecam, gives us landlubbers a whale's-eye view beneath the ocean
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(PennLive)
 
 
 
Showing up hammered at your DUI hearing will elicit no sympathy from the bench. (With helpful picture of Thirsty McDrunkerstein.)
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(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 667: "Shades of Gray 3". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
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(NYPost)
 
 
 
EPA head Scott Pruitt says he always travels first class to make sure he can avoid all those dirty, poor, unwashed, uneducated, security threats that might be sitting in coach
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Burglar tries to throw a brick through a glass door and fails. So does the second burglar, but the first burglar intercepts the brick with his head
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Wed February 14, 2018
(NBC Olympics)
 
 
 
Another busy night for us at the Olympics. Women's curling starts us off at 7pm ET, then the pairs free skate, Mikaela Shiffrin in the slalom, and the Men's Downhill provided the weather cooperates. Hockey, snowboard cross, and cross county at night <