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headlines found matching 'Florida'

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Fri July 23, 2021
		This "dog" deserves steak source: abc7.com \| share:	50
		Texas gunman pulls a Florida move by highjacking an ambulance with patients and EMTs inside source: dailyboulder.com \| share:	27
		Lara Trump moves up in the Idiot Rankings source: politicususa.com \| share:	85
		What do Florida, Missouri and Texas have in common? They are the three states that now account for 40% of new coronavirus cases source: yahoo.com \| share:	85

Thu July 22, 2021
		Nooooo ooonnne...🎶 Boasts like Gaston, makes burnt toast like Gaston. 🎶 And nobody knows how to roast like Gaston...🎶 source: nypost.com \| share:	12
		Homeowners yell, "Have him die somewhere else," at lawncare-worker trying to save neighbor's life on their lawn. Florida tag crestfallen after selection of Murica tag in a tossup decision source: msn.com \| share:	105
(Some Guy)		Ron DeSantis (R) - who signed a bill outlawing vaccine passports, blames experts for public distrust of vaccines, sells 'Don't Fauci My Florida' merch, and was hesitant to disclose his own vaccination - wants you to know 'vaccines are saving lives' source: thelist.com \| share:	156
		Former FSU football coach Bobby Bowden announced his terminal medical condition diagnosis today. "I am prepared for what is to come. My wife Ann and our family have been life's greatest blessing. I am at peace" source: wesh.com \| share:	11
		Doctor advises travelers not to go to Florida lest Florida Man cough on them. Considering what gets posted to Fark from there, that seems the least of people's problems source: finance.yahoo.com \| share:	43
		Michigan goes full Florida by striking down the law Whitmer used to impose public health restrictions during the pandemic source: uppermichiganssource.com \| share:	58

Wed July 21, 2021
		Pop quiz, hotshot: you come home and find a naked woman skinny dipping in your pool. What do you do? Before you answer, remember this: this was in Florida source: clickorlando.com \| share:	100
		Arsenal pulls out of Florida Cup after members contract Covid, realizing they have to travel to Florida source: apnews.com \| share:	4

Tue July 20, 2021
		White Boy Rick sues police officers and FBI agents. Everybody who saw the White Boy Rick movies wishes they could sue the producers, director, and actors source: mlive.com \| share:	42
		Gov DeSantis as weekly covid cases have risen fourfold since June 17th: All is well, remain calm, nothing to see here, masks and vaccines are the REAL threat, right guys? guys? source: politico.com \| share:	104
		Bad: You crash your bicycle and fall down an embankment into some water. AAHHHH: A 9-foot alligator comes out of the water and grabs you source: fox8.com \| share:	38

Mon July 19, 2021
		Fake power company workers steal $25K of Florida woman's jewelry, which is why it's best to use real power companies, or even better, real ultimate power companies which are run by ninjas source: clickorlando.com \| share:	18
		If you think "My Lovely Horse: Happy Time" is a blatant Chinese knockoff of My Little Pony: Friendship is magic, then you would be wrong. See tag source: equestriadaily.com \| share:	59
		We've had bird flu, swine flu, and bats gave us COVID. Now it is time to introduce the deadly Monkey B virus onto the world source: yahoo.com \| share:	33
		Conservative porn star is not a term you expect to see often source: mediaite.com \| share:	123
		Seems no one in the US knew what a "corn teen" was source: salon.com \| share:	102
		Monsters of Grift Super Tour reports bigliest sales ever and you'll get you ass sued off if you report otherwise source: thehill.com \| share:	76

Sun July 18, 2021
		The group which should be most afraid of the Delta variant is least afraid of the Delta variant source: politico.com \| share:	169
		De-ruling from de-judge lifting de-restrictions on de-cruise industry d'overturned d'on d'appeal source: ktla.com \| share:	101
		The College Republicans are revolting source: salon.com \| share:	159
		The most Florida thing you'll see all week source: twitter.com \| share:	91
		If your car stops at yard sales, it will take a while longer to drive through Elk, Clearfield counties in PA source: wearecentralpa.com \| share:	21

Sat July 17, 2021
		Venue cancels Gaetz/Greene MAGApalooza. This is not a threepeat from last week. [Update: It's now a "Peaceful Protest Against Communism" outside City Hall] source: huffpost.com \| share:	136
		State "experts" wonder if the devastating toxic algae bloom in Tampa Bay has something to do with those 215 million gallons of phosphor contaminated water they dumped into it source: theguardian.com \| share:	31

Fri July 16, 2021
		Two former cops arrested for their role in the insurrection, all because they blabbed to family. Welp, they're Tucked source: msn.com \| share:	56
		Miami has apparently begun its inevitable and irreversible collapse. This is not a repeat of the Dan Marino era source: nbcnews.com \| share:	113
		Florida accounts for one in five new COVID cases, six out of seven weird news stories source: mynews13.com \| share:	35
		Florida experiences nearly 90% increase in hospital admissions as Covid-19 continues to not give a fark about what people's political and religious views are source: abcnews.go.com \| share:	164
		Yes, but where else would you expect to find a historic poop? source: clickorlando.com \| share:	15

Thu July 15, 2021
		Today, in 'Euphemism or not a euphemism": 'Teaching the alligator a lesson' source: clickorlando.com \| share:	31
		When boys win championships, they get individual trophies, large team trophy. When girls win championships, they get goody bags. Parents begged to differ source: wesh.com \| share:	91
		Plea deal for Florida Man who found himself in a legal pickle after cops spotted a pickle in him source: thesmokinggun.com \| share:	91
		Why the SOS Cuba protesters in Miami weren't arrested under Gov. Ron DeSantis' new anti-riot law source: local10.com \| share:	66
		Joe Exotic to be re-sentenced for trying to kill that farking Carole Baskin source: cbsnews.com \| share:	15
		Yo dawg, I heard you liked collapses so we caused a condo market collapse with a condo collapse source: cnbc.com \| share:	62
		Bet you smile at these photos of doggy-daycare classes full of good boys (& girls). Enjoy the dog days of summer, y'all source: sadanduseless.com \| share:	8
		The 'rona goes all Gritty on Georgia man who went all Florida man on vaccines source: wsbtv.com \| share:	160
		How dumb is Tiffany Trump? She actually believes her dad would...or even could pay for her "international spectacle" of a wedding source: vanityfair.com \| share:	137

Wed July 14, 2021
		Judge dismisses lawsuit against Royal Caribbean Cruises after finding that no, they actually DON'T need to warn passengers that dangling their babies out of 11th story windows could end in tragedy, since most people can figure that out on their own source: lawandcrime.com \| share:	227
		The cat came back source: cnn.com \| share:	6
		Criminal mastermind's plot to hire a hitman to murder his ex-girlfriend and her family and then pin it all on Black Lives Matter is, shockingly, not successful source: nbcwashington.com \| share:	54
		You know, I'm starting to think this Ron DeSantis fella might be something of an asshole source: nbcwashington.com \| share:	77
(Eye ESPY)		Can old people legally yell at you to get off their LAN? source: nolo.com \| share:	41
		Who would dare to sue Florida over its vaccine passport ban? Norwegians would. Isn't it good? source: politico.com \| share:	68
		Gov Ron DeSantis pretty much admits that he only signs laws to punish people that didn't vote for him source: miaminewtimes.com \| share:	47

Tue July 13, 2021
		If you are upset over an airline's bag fee you a) take the bus, b) write a complaint, c) make a fake bomb threat. In related news: Canada man can morph into Florida man if he is exposed to the state for too long source: nbcnews.com \| share:	25
		Onion headline comes to real life: "First-Time Carjacker Wasn't Expecting A Stick Shift" source: thedrive.com \| share:	113
		I'll take a mulligan source: local10.com \| share:	29
		Hunters target state bird of Florida for extinction source: local10.com \| share:	38

Mon July 12, 2021
		Florida Boat becomes violent, attacks three other boats source: wpbf.com \| share:	51
(Not Buffalo)		Six NFL teams exceed 85% vaccination threshold, more than double five states, such as Florida and Missouri source: profootballrumors.com \| share:	12
		Oh the huge manatee death record source: npr.org \| share:	4
		Florida man finds loophole in Florida law allowing him to cosplay as a mass murderer who enjoys fishing source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	106
		It starting to look like Florida Man has branched out into international assassination plots source: apnews.com \| share:	29

Sun July 11, 2021
		CPAC was farking WEIRD source: forbes.com \| share:	90
		Putative Homeowner: Well, I've hit my golden years, I'm selling my house up North and moving to sunny Florida. Municipality: Yeah, about that. We're seizing half the profits from the sale source: nj.com \| share:	187
		"If you work on the top 12 floors, stay home. If you work on floors 1-16...meh, you'll be fine" source: ktla.com \| share:	48

Sat July 10, 2021
		Florida will be hosting a Bigfoot Conference because you really can't make this stuff up source: orlandoweekly.com \| share:	63
		Want to make $10,000 the hard way? Florida Python Challenge this weekend source: fox13news.com \| share:	40
		I'm not crying, YOU'RE crying source: cbsnews.com \| share:	37

Fri July 09, 2021
		NBD, just a town in the Arctic circle matching Miami's highest temperature this year. We're fine. We're all fine here, now, thank you. How are you? source: msn.com \| share:	76
		Civics literacy supporters unsure of why Florida Governor DeSantis does not want increased civics literacy source: mynews13.com \| share:	21
(Florida Politics)		Pro-Insurrection Florida Man Rave + delta variant + freedumbing should make this a self-correcting problem in 3 - 6 weeks. Sinkholes and alligators optional source: floridapolitics.com \| share:	53
		High rise condos in Marina Del Rey, CA might go all Florida if the HOA can't come up with the estimated $80 million to $140 million in needed repairs source: dailybreeze.com \| share:	88
		Turns out the "Big Lie" isn't even close to Florida Man's biggest. Now he claims that his Twitter ban was a good thing because it gave him time to read source: yahoo.com \| share:	69
		Nine killed as skydiving plane crashed in Sweden, in tragedy that officially puts Florida's Skydive DeLand on notice source: aljazeera.com \| share:	43
		DeSantis is running source: apnews.com \| share:	92
		Governor repealed law that could have prevented Florida's Champlain Tower collapse source: nbcnews.com \| share:	149
		Florida man realizes the benefits of doing chores as he found a winning $1 million lottery ticket while cleaning his house source: local21news.com \| share:	14

Thu July 08, 2021
		"Twice-impeached Florida Retiree". The snark is strong with this one source: twitter.com \| share:	94
		Goodbye America, it was fun while it lasted source: axios.com \| share:	134
		You're not outraged that the TB Lightning "cheated." You're outraged that your team wasn't smart enough to work the system source: espn.com \| share:	41
		Desantis takes immediate action, launches investigation into structural integrity of coastal highrises and a review of the failures that led to the collapse. Just kidding, that would hurt landlords' bottom line source: tampabay.com \| share:	101

Wed July 07, 2021
		Couple sues Catholic school for not hating gays hard enough. They also paid $1.35 million to get their kid enrolled. Aunt Becky scoffs source: friendlyatheist.patheos.com \| share:	97
		Florida lawyer reprimanded for idiotic condo-collapse lawsuit source: msn.com \| share:	25
		Trump, who claims ignorance of tax laws involved in current indictments, said this in 2015: "Nobody knows the tax code better than I do... I'm like a student of the tax code. I know more about taxes than any human being that God ever created" source: thedailybeast.com \| share:	58
		While real estate prices have been skyrocketing across the country, there are about to be some real bargains to be had, as a massive oversupply of units is expected to hit the Florida condo market source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	51
		Donald Trump announces lawsuit against Zuckerberg and Dorsey, who are expected to respond as soon as they recover from their laughing fit source: cnn.com \| share:	123
		Even Floridians hate Florida source: twitter.com \| share:	89

Tue July 06, 2021
		Couple purchase their first Tesla. As this is Florida, everything went ... swimmingly? source: electrek.co \| share:	32
		The best places to get a Cuban sandwich in Tampa. Publix absent from list source: wfla.com \| share:	22
		List of 21 valuable tips for surviving hurricane season sadly fails to mention 'buy a plunger before you need a plunger' source: clickorlando.com \| share:	70
		Jimmy Uso tries out for .205 Live source: tmz.com \| share:	22
		Rep Adam Kinzinger pinpoints the moment when Republicans capitulated to Trump and it wasn't the ride down the escalator source: huffpost.com \| share:	75
		Never Trump author turned Senate candidate hands his shriveled balls to Trump source: politico.com \| share:	47
		Yes, cry for me, MAGA Nation / The truth is I never left you / All through my wild days / My mad existence / I kept no promise / Please keep your distance source: talkingpointsmemo.com \| share:	87

Mon July 05, 2021
		Rep. Boebart (CO-isuRrectionist) celebrates the 4th of July with a stirring rendition of "Onward Christian Soldiers" source: alternet.org \| share:	157
		Trump's new spokesperson tacitly admitted he's lying about the election source: huffpost.com \| share:	52
		Now people want to serve on juries. Wonder what changed? source: axios.com \| share:	186
		Two adults, nine juveniles overdose, are rushed to ER from mental health facility. Looks like someone smuggled in some bad shiat source: clickorlando.com \| share:	31

Sun July 04, 2021
		The GOP primary for Texas governor prepares to go plaid source: politico.com \| share:	53

Sat July 03, 2021
		So many tags to choose from. One tag to rule them all. Now they have 2 reasons to get snot hanging drunk source: washingtonexaminer.com \| share:	79

Fri July 02, 2021
		Forget about weeds in the kitchen hon; what are we gonna do about the leak in the basement? Maybe a sump pump? Nah, lets just swim in it source: nypost.com \| share:	37
		Biden elevates hypothetical link between global warming and Surfside condo collapse. Sure is salty down there source: washingtonexaminer.com \| share:	67

Thu July 01, 2021
		Clearly, Tucker Carlson knows he's near the end of his journey and he's gone more berserk than usual source: mediaite.com \| share:	64
		In Florida Complex League action, Wilmer Fenelon of the Tigers earns the win, while Wilmer Fenelon of the Tigers gets the loss. Erwin Schrödinger nods in approval source: milb.com \| share:	2
(Realtor.com)		Hey, what's the story with this house in Florida? Oh my source: realtor.com \| share:	48
(Some Guy)		"Pretending to be a firework is also going to run afoul of our noise ordinances" source: wymt.com \| share:	23
		Trump said, 'yeah, okay' and hung up the phone when his health secretary warned him about the coronavirus in January 2020. In 2021 we recommend using this strategy against any/all plague rats in your life source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	109
		Florida does... something right? source: wcjb.com \| share:	48
		Trump won't cancel FL rally and keep the state focus on the Surfside building disaster, because those 150+ very-crushed-to-death-people are like 3 WHOLE HOURS away from Sarasota source: heraldtribune.com \| share:	89

Wed June 30, 2021
		Yo, dawg, I heard you like deplatforming, so a federal judge deplatformed law banning deplatforming source: nbcnews.com \| share:	61
(Some Guy)		Yup, Florida source: ocala-news.com \| share:	43
		Baseball coach arrested for child porn, explicit chats about sex with kids, having 100s of plastic bags containing previously worn underwear for women, girls. "He was weird, he was really weird" source: wftv.com \| share:	37
		"I fought in 'Nam, that's why I'm paying to send the N. Dakota National guard to Texas." and other political wisdom from an auto scrap billionaire source: talkingpointsmemo.com \| share:	103

Tue June 29, 2021
		His alibi of "Whadayamean roosters don't lay eggs?" did not convince law enforcement officials source: local10.com \| share:	24
		Sanford man accused of stealing nearly $1 million in CARES Act funds, being a big dummy source: wftv.com \| share:	28
		President and First Lady to visit Miami in wake of building collapse, and before Fox starts asking why Biden isn't visiting Miami source: msn.com \| share:	63
		Artistic octopus paints with tentacles at Florida Aquarium. And yet, when I try to paint with an octopus, everyone acts all horrified source: clickorlando.com \| share:	64
		California adds Arkansas, Florida, Montana, North Dakota and West Virginia to list of states where state-funded travel is banned, which is kind of like telling people they're not allowed to vacation in Mogadishu source: aol.com \| share:	212
		You might want to sit down for this, but it sort of looks like a Florida-based lead factory and smelter has not been entirely operating up to federal regulatory standards source: pbs.org \| share:	30
		Clingy girlfriends save lives source: cnn.com \| share:	68
		"Welcome to Florida, here's your million dollars" source: local10.com \| share:	44

Mon June 28, 2021
		Boat spotted by fisherman that was adrift off the Turks and Caicos island is found to have 20 dead people aboard including women and children, Authorities say they have ruled out foul play, but not a stowaway vampire source: apnews.com \| share:	58
(Some Guy)		Whistleblower scientist Rebekah Jones hits the gas pedal on a campaign to unseat Matt Gaetz in FL-1 source: rebekahjonescampaign.com \| share:	75
		John Oliver asks his blessed congregants to join his most recent religious adventure, "JohnnyCare", his Health Care Sharing Ministry. And if that sounds like a scam, your Florida-dar is calibrated and working nicely source: huffpost.com \| share:	109
		Corruption? In Florida? Let me get my fainting couch source: nypost.com \| share:	40
		What's 7-Eleven minus 200? We're about to find out source: ibtimes.com \| share:	22
		Just why are Trump supporters worshiping a loser? Adam Kinzinger really wants to know source: politicususa.com \| share:	55

Sun June 27, 2021
		Florida man: "Let me enter my DNA into this genealogy database. What's the worst that could happen?" source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	183
		Gator crosses major roadway to run away from Fraiser, Niles, and Martin source: usatoday.com \| share:	17
		Sorry we arrested you, you're not the guy... have fun in Arkansas or Missouri, wherever you're going to jail source: wfla.com \| share:	54
(Some Jerk)		New landlord evicts elderly and disabled tenants. All 200 of them source: scriberrnews.com \| share:	145

Sat June 26, 2021
		Charlie Kirk is a special kind of stupid source: mediaite.com \| share:	99
		Engineer warned in 2018 of "major structural damage" at deadly Florida condo complex. Repair project was supposed to start soon. Apparently not soon enough (link updated) source: msn.com \| share:	262
		Florida politician attempting to unseat Liz Cheney in Wyoming describes his past dissemination of Qanon drivel as an attempt to flush out the leftist media or something source: msn.com \| share:	45
		Forgive me Pastor for I have sinned. I turned you into the FBI for your part in the January 6th insurrection source: deadstate.org \| share:	71
		83-year-old man has visited every theme park in America, and these are his favorites source: rd.com \| share:	43

Fri June 25, 2021
		If you're thinking of taking your unvaccinated kids on a cruise, you might want to think again source: cnbc.com \| share:	44
		Seeing how well things are going in Florida, DeSantis deploys his police to Arizona and Texas source: local10.com \| share:	63
		"The opponents must grant us that youth has never before flocked to our colours in such numbers" source: axios.com \| share:	85
		Florida keeping covid cases secret like they were Matt Gaetz's underage girlfriends source: sun-sentinel.com \| share:	30

Thu June 24, 2021
		Florida Man pleads guilty to conspiracy and obstruction regarding the insurrection. So who did he give up? source: justice.gov \| share:	36
		Is "Wakayama man" Japan's version of "Florida man"? source: japantoday.com \| share:	35

Wed June 23, 2021
		In the age-old battle between nope and nope, nope usually wins. Who ya got; spider or snake? source: livescience.com \| share:	16
		Nine months after lockdowns, US births plummeted by 8%. WTF, people? source: bnnbloomberg.ca \| share:	135
		DeSantis signs law requiring students, staff, and faculty at public universities to register their political affiliation with the state. For diversity. Or else source: msn.com \| share:	306
		Texas-sized convenience store Buc-ee's is out to prove that everything is bigger in Texas by building the world's largest convenience store in...Tennessee? source: kxan.com \| share:	36

Tue June 22, 2021
		So shines a good deed in a weary world. Florida high school principal crafts personal notes for 459 graduates. Hero tag makes the rare fill-in for the Florida tag here source: fox7austin.com \| share:	11
		Florida principal crafts personal notes for 459 graduates. What would your principal say about you? source: local21news.com \| share:	32
		Florida bartender finds creative way to get rid of dude aggressively hitting on women at his bar source: tampabay.com \| share:	102

Mon June 21, 2021
		Florida couple celebrates 75th wedding anniversary. Their secret? "Most of our friends are dead" source: tampabay.com \| share:	16
		Now there's a double-bill for the ages source: thenewcivilrightsmovement.com \| share:	71
		Buddy the beefalo is settling in in his new home in Florida. He says he doesn't mind the 4 p.m. dinners and really rocks the white loafers source: nbcconnecticut.com \| share:	2

Sun June 20, 2021
		The Florida Pride "killer" turns out to be just another old guy who shouldn't be driving and unable to find a farmer's market, settled for what was close at hand source: bbc.com \| share:	118
		Red state voters reap what they sow by having their Republican state legislators do everything in their power to prevent voter-passed "progressive" ballot initiatives such as Medicaid expansion and pot legalization source: nbcnews.com \| share:	170
		Pickup truck drives into a crowd at a Florida pride parade hitting two, one fatally, and narrowly missing a car Debbie Wasserman Schultz was riding in source: thehill.com \| share:	129

Sat June 19, 2021
		What you need to know before you go: just don't. Seriously source: cnn.com \| share:	211
		Welcome to Florida, kids source: wsvn.com \| share:	53
		Federal judge sides with Florida, lifts CDC no-sail order against cruises. The COVID must flow source: clickorlando.com \| share:	54
		Top Florida Democrats want a bipartisan state commission to investigate Florida's traitor problem source: heraldtribune.com \| share:	21
		Ted Cruz is really bad at comparisons source: theweek.com \| share:	69

Fri June 18, 2021
		Central Florida sex trafficking investigation gaetzing bigger source: abcnews.go.com \| share:	59
		I bet the funeral is gonna be HUGE source: nbc-2.com \| share:	30
		Florida election supervisors can't make any sense of the new voting law. That's the point of it, right? source: axios.com \| share:	30
		Florida intellectual weighs in on Critical Race Theory source: realclearpolitics.com \| share:	116

Thu June 17, 2021
		Florida wackos accept challenge, show Texas it can't be No. 50 for long source: yahoo.com \| share:	29
		At least everyone still has masks they can wear to reduce their intake as Saharan dust moves in from the Atlantic to the state of checks notes uh-oh source: weartv.com \| share:	9
		I have a U-haul and I want to paint it black source: wktv.com \| share:	58
		Florida Man tells us one more thing he knows about the Jew - "Jewish people who live in the United States don't love Israel enough. Does that make sense to you? I'm not talking about Orthodox Jews." Subby's response: lech tizdayen, chamor catom source: twitter.com \| share:	173

Wed June 16, 2021
		Ron DeSantis deploys FL state law enforcement officers to police illegal immigration...in Arizona and Texas source: thehill.com \| share:	79
		Florida Alligator plays a game of ding dong dash source: msn.com \| share:	16
		Royal Caribbean finds its inaugural cruise postponed after two crew members test positive for Covid-19 source: cnn.com \| share:	21

Tue June 15, 2021
		Oh, nothing, just a box of 30 armor-piercing grenades stolen from a U.S. Marine Corps depot in Florida that ended up stuffed into a pillow case behind some bushes at some contractor's house in Atlanta source: npr.org \| share:	128
		Pinky swear that you have been vaccinated will get you into Disney. Double dog dare will still get you kicked out source: gizmodo.com \| share:	47
		Lightning hits car on I-75 leaving 7-foot mark on pavement. No word on what kind of skid marks the driver left source: clickorlando.com \| share:	51
		On the day before they file, Florida Congressional Candidate gets temporary restraining orders against her two GOP primary opponents because, according to her, they have conspired to have her killed source: tampabay.com \| share:	76
		Alabama officially hits 30% of fully vaccinated individuals against COVID-19, thanks God again for Mississippi source: whnt.com \| share:	17

Mon June 14, 2021
		Masks could have stopped the pandemic, but Trump source: dailykos.com \| share:	82

Sun June 13, 2021
		States that took COVID seriously did better protecting their citizens' health, AND their economy source: lamag.com \| share:	73
		The worst thing about security cameras in McDonald's is they're watching you eat AND steal from kids with cancer source: fox13news.com \| share:	28
		Florida man likes to eat most things he finds in his yard source: fox13news.com \| share:	43
		Texas man goes to Florida, finds out source: lawandcrime.com \| share:	162
		Mudcat Grant joins the hereafter's sports nickname Hall of Fame source: thewrap.com \| share:	5

Sat June 12, 2021
		Want to travel the country for a month? Do you have $299? All ABOOOOOAAARD source: thrillist.com \| share:	140
		A guy could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that source: fox5ny.com \| share:	45
		Florida man's quixotic quest to unseat Georgia governor runs into a snag: no one in the Georgia GOP is interested in running against him source: cnn.com \| share:	56
		Bitcoin and Covid walk into a bar. The bartender says... source: msn.com \| share:	35

Fri June 11, 2021
		We just had a deer in our back yard eating mulberries source: fark.com \| share:	35
		Today in Florida....the mystery of rubber bales that washed up on Palm Beach may be solved source: msn.com \| share:	11
		This anaconda is huge source: msn.com \| share:	29
		Florida woman leaves drugged man at hotel. Fails to take kidneys source: local10.com \| share:	16
		Another pantless Florida woman. Must be hot down there this week source: thesmokinggun.com \| share:	84

Thu June 10, 2021
		A cruise line thinks it has found a way around DeSantis' vaccine passport ban source: forbes.com \| share:	96
		When you're too much of a Florida Man for even Florida source: dailyboulder.com \| share:	28
		The Sunshine State now has its own "Bridgegate" scandal, and, like everything else involving Gov. DeSantis, it's far more stupid and petty than the original source: politico.com \| share:	39
		Turns out that south Florida is basically one giant Comic-Con dedicated to the extended Trump universe source: yahoo.com \| share:	65
		Florida Man uses podcast to interview guy who ate his own foot. Asks, "what was that like?" source: tampabay.com \| share:	45
		At this point a chess player's time clock would be more useful for tracking days without a mass shooting in the US source: nbcnews.com \| share:	89
(Some Guy)		Fine, so you want to cruise unvaccinated? Okay. Here's the bill for each of the daily tests we're going to administer so you can wander amongst the vaccinated masses source: royalcaribbeanblog.com \| share:	84
		Florida: Why is there a man sitting inside a box in Fort Lauderdale's airport? source: msn.com \| share:	43
		What a crappy way to go source: clickorlando.com \| share:	19

Wed June 09, 2021
		"Ya'll chill, I'm just intoxicated" may not be the smartest thing to say to cops after you've just run down a pedestrian while driving 114 mph source: clickorlando.com \| share:	35
		"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds" doesn't mention anything about gators source: abcactionnews.com \| share:	17
		The federal government is contributing to climate change, needs to get rid of its energy wasting marijuana ban source: theweek.com \| share:	32
		The Congressional Black Caucus is blackballing a Republican Congressman. Maybe he shouldn't have supported the insurrection source: buzzfeednews.com \| share:	64
		If you ask me, "I hope I do better than a sex trafficker" makes for one hell of a campaign slogan source: yahoo.com \| share:	41
		Just because it's a Rolls, that doesn't mean you shouldn't get a Carfax report on it source: jalopnik.com \| share:	46
		Royal Caribbean flip-flops on unvaccinated cruisers. Its fans aren't so happy source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	85
		Florida Woman, Disneyland, snack foods, and kids books are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 23-29: Homemade Ice Cream Edition source: fark.com \| share:	20
		Armie Hammer checks into rehab for drugs, alcohol, sex, and cannibalism source: tmz.com \| share:	23
		Florida Department of Transportation: "No bridges with teh ghey" source: news4jax.com \| share:	126
		Going to get tacos in the Everglades turns out to be a bad idea source: local10.com \| share:	30

Tue June 08, 2021
		Is it time to talk about glass control? Forget it Jake, it's Florida source: fox13news.com \| share:	20
		"Our residents should not be held prisoner to a business model that promotes the all-night hard partying that has generated an unsafe atmosphere in our city" source: abcnews.go.com \| share:	34
		Is the Orange Menace in such a sad, pathetic state of insecurity that he's enlisting the help of long washed up asshole Bill O'Reilly to hold his hand during his next "Save Murica Tour". In a word, Yes source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	51
		DeSantis uses Military to Block a DNC representative from entering a political event. Do you have papers? Florida Man Edition source: twitter.com \| share:	95
		18-year-old Georgia woman on life support after sister accidentally shot her in face while they drove to Miami. They were probably distracted while debating what a Big Mac is called in France source: clickorlando.com \| share:	131
		Recommended carry on luggage: Backpacks, purses, small travelbags. Not recommended carry on luggage: Pool noodles source: foxnews.com \| share:	27
		Man out fishing with his pals reels in rare, 400 pound grouper. Fark: They grow to twice that weight source: wjcl.com \| share:	21
		Florida woman who saw 'baby dinosaur' running through yard says this is what it was source: fox35orlando.com \| share:	69

Mon June 07, 2021
		Twitter suspends whistleblower's account while the governor applauds source: wtxl.com \| share:	85
		An evening of conversation about sexual assault and how to get away with it source: washingtontimes.com \| share:	55
		State government offices in Alabama are closed today to celebrate the birthday of the loser who led the Great White Attempt To Keep Those Slaves In The Cotton Fields source: al.com \| share:	74
		Florida Woman: "Hold my beer." (video NSFW) source: twitter.com \| share:	328

Sun June 06, 2021
		reads headline He's not wrong, you know. reads article Good.jpg source: foxnews.com \| share:	64
		Florida Man goes hunting for shark teeth, finds alligator teeth in the most Florida way source: cnn.com \| share:	15
		It's bad enough when a 14-year-old is accused of murder, but it really makes you wonder what the world is coming to when his mother tries to destroy the evidence source: clickorlando.com \| share:	227

Sat June 05, 2021
		86-year-old man should not have to beg to work one more year for financial reasons. 86-year-old man should also not kill his boss when told no source: miami.cbslocal.com \| share:	127
		Swarms of insects invade SW Florida. Are they love bugs? Palmetto bugs? Giant cockroaches? Mosquitoes? Oh, just gnats. Call us when something serious pops up source: nbc-2.com \| share:	10

Fri June 04, 2021
		Well I'm already doing life in prison .... let's add 6 more to the list source: independent.co.uk \| share:	24
		LEO attacked by dangerous animal source: fox13news.com \| share:	6

Thu June 03, 2021
		Old and busted: Coyotes invading urban neighborhoods. New hotness: Bears invading urban neighborhoods source: abcactionnews.com \| share:	21
		Touring bands, classic movies, new technology, and of course Florida Man are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 23-29: Polish Spareribs Edition source: fark.com \| share:	20
		Florida's conundrum: The state is surrounded on 3 sides by ocean, and sea-levels ARE rising, but the 20 ft seawall necessary to protect against hurricanes would be really ugly source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	152
		USFL announces plans to declare bankruptcy in fall 2022 source: profootballtalk.nbcsports.com \| share:	25
		Maybe it just wanted some Texas BBQ. You ever think about that? Of course not, you only think about yourself source: fieldandstream.com \| share:	27

Wed June 02, 2021
		News: Florida Man takes son on a "drive-by" with his paintball gun. Fark: Residents think it's a real drive-by and fire back with live rounds. Florida: Dad accidentally runs over son after the son is shot source: nypost.com \| share:	90
		Florida Man pleads guilty source: news.yahoo.com \| share:	33
		Judge tells defendant that 'stand your ground' doesn't apply to iguanas source: cnn.com \| share:	36

Tue June 01, 2021
		Alligator fractures skull of diver and 34 staples in head. Chubbs Peterson gives it a thumb up source: abcactionnews.com \| share:	26
		Where there's smoke there's fire, sometimes in exactly that order source: tampabay.com \| share:	15
		Florida woman gets married. Don't guess what happens next source: apnews.com \| share:	25
		Rapper DaBaby involved in DaShooting in DaMiami DaBeach source: local10.com \| share:	24
		Rebel Wilson has lost a whole lot of weight and would like to show you the fruits of her labor source: pagesix.com \| share:	55
		Republicans have no clue what their base wants source: dailykos.com \| share:	107

Mon May 31, 2021
		Florida kid shoots paint balls. Florida man responds with lead balls source: local10.com \| share:	79
		Woman rescued from Florida storm drain reported missing in Texas. I didn't even know storm drains went that far source: cbs12.com \| share:	25
		Mr. Florida steals White Claw, veterinary pain pills, barber shop supplies and cash. Fark: this guy is actually named Mr. Florida source: wfla.com \| share:	22
		Four more Oath Keepers charged in Capitol insurrection. Five other Oath Keepers face additional charges. FBI agents and DOJ members take an oath too, just sayin' source: cnn.com \| share:	93

Sun May 30, 2021
		Can The Cleaner beat a bastard and a slacker to retain the AEW title? Will The MurderHawk best The Best Man for the TNT belt? Will Shida retain vs D.M.D? Who wins the Casino Battle Royale? It's AEW's Double or Nothing starting at 8 PM ET on B/R Live source: allelitewrestling.com \| share:	217
		Man in rabbit mask indecently exposes himself to fire crew helping a woman, does yoga naked near a clock tower and flashes two prison guards. And he's not even from Florida source: leicestermercury.co.uk \| share:	36
		2 dead, over 20 people injured in a mass shooting in Miami. Suspects are still at large. Can we just do away with the clock completely now? source: nbcnews.com \| share:	342

Sat May 29, 2021
		Gov. Ron DeSenseless takes on his most formidable opponent yet ... and the lido deck will never be the same source: local10.com \| share:	180
		Florida Inspector General grants Rebekah Jones whistleblower status. DeSantis cowering in his Fox News bunker ready to sign laws banning whistles and blowing source: yahoo.com \| share:	113
		Florida Man arrested for stealing 100s of ventilators intended for critically ill COVID-19 patients in El Salvador source: local10.com \| share:	29

Fri May 28, 2021
		Passengers please buckle up and prepare for turbulence .... the pilot is almost there, another minute tops source: abcnews.go.com \| share:	47
		Florida "Men" source: twitter.com \| share:	65
		As millions of people plan backyard BBQ's this weekend, Fark braces for rash of 'Fail', 'Dumbass' and 'Florida' submissions source: agrilifetoday.tamu.edu \| share:	33
		LA has three new ugly-ass bobcat kittens source: laist.com \| share:	9
		Jenkins said he parked the $250,000 vehicle in the south economy lot. Somehow, this did not end well source: espn.com \| share:	17
		2 dead, 10 missing, 8 rescued, 1 sunk boat source: nbcnews.com \| share:	51

Thu May 27, 2021
		Big tech downvotes Florida source: theverge.com \| share:	72
		Old and Busted: The Kardashians. And I literally mean that. New hotness...okay, well maybe not new, but close enough: the Thornes source: pagesix.com \| share:	12
		Former Palm Beach County GOP leader charged with crimes against government, fashion source: palmbeachpost.com \| share:	19
		If you're having a mental crisis, this might not be the best place to go source: abc13.com \| share:	28
		Good news: woman gets a sperm donor who's a doctor. Bad news: the doctor who inseminated her source: nypost.com \| share:	75
		Alan Dershowitz is desperately trying to give Netflix his life savings and home on Martha's Vineyard source: marketwatch.com \| share:	7
		McDonald's hates to raise wages so much that it would rather give away free iPhones to attract workers instead source: fox5ny.com \| share:	28

Wed May 26, 2021
		Want to see punk rock band concert headlined by Teenage Bottlerocket in St. Petersburg next month? Tickets are only $18, except, if unvaccinated for COVID-19, that'll be $999.99 source: abcactionnews.com \| share:	14
		Florida man takes news of grand jury convening as well as you'd expect source: talkingpointsmemo.com \| share:	139
		Florida's new cancel culture law for social media companies could apply to Trump's shiatty blog the moment he allows comments source: twitter.com \| share:	78
		That's what, 3, 4 Floridans? source: foxla.com \| share:	54

Tue May 25, 2021
		The NBA Playoffs continue with the Celtics trying to avenge their Game 1 loss in Game 2 against the Nets. The Suns would like to beat the Lakers again and the Mavericks are looking to double down on the Clippers. It all begins at 7:30 PM ET on TNT source: espn.com \| share:	36
		Florida Man eats, punches, and leaves at Maui Panda Express source: hawaiinewsnow.com \| share:	35

Mon May 24, 2021
		What do you call FAA proposing fines of over than US$60,000 against unruly airline passengers in mask fights? An excellent start source: nbcnews.com \| share:	7
		Cops: Florida Man used slice of pizza as weapon source: thesmokinggun.com \| share:	37
		Anything can be a weapon, if you're Florida enough source: thesmokinggun.com \| share:	18
		Kid cleans out family car and finds $5k from previous owner, who gifts him 20% for returning it source: wcax.com \| share:	34
(Some Guy)		Obvious: Qevin McCarthy shouldn't be speaker of the house, Fark: oh shiat Bobert wants the job, Florida: Gaetz endorses Bobert source: coloradotimesrecorder.com \| share:	77
		Governor Ron DeSantis vows to keep American historical facts on slavery, racism, lynching, discrimination, civil rights protests, suffrage, Jim Crow, segregation out of state's public classrooms since they weren't in Declaration of Independence source: cltampa.com \| share:	83
		There is a reason they're called the Florida Keys source: fox13news.com \| share:	43
		THERE she is. Good girl. Good GOP girl. Now sit source: huffpost.com \| share:	98
		Governor Ron DeSantis (FL-GOP) signs bill into law that will fine social media companies "deplatforming" political candidates up to $250,000 a day, encourages politicians to lie with impunity source: wfla.com \| share:	251
		When even Steve-O says you're a complete train wreck and need help it may be time to stop worrying about being a Jackass source: tmz.com \| share:	39
		If Tyerune is found shot to death and Doug and Jasmine are suspects, than X equals the arrest of middle school math teacher Martesha. Investigators will solve for Y source: fox35orlando.com \| share:	16
		Florida Woman: "Hold my beer and HANG ON" source: wfla.com \| share:	44
		Scientists successfully breed corals with goal of disease, zombie resistance source: phys.org \| share:	6
		Vampire fish found again in river, surprisingly not in Florida source: fox40.com \| share:	9

Sun May 23, 2021
(Some Guy)		Florida Man/Poop Smear double-header source: nxsttv.com \| share:	26
		Unsure if they were to go to the right or left of the buoy, they decided to crash into it source: local10.com \| share:	56

Sat May 22, 2021
		Mandatory 10-digit dialing starts today throughout Florida Panhandle. What could possibly go wrong? source: pnj.com \| share:	135
		Apparently the punishment for allegedly killing a pedestrian in Florida is deportation to Guatemala source: mypanhandle.com \| share:	72
		News that will come as a surprise to absolutely no one, travel edition source: msn.com \| share:	80
		Florida Man™ attempts to rob a bank. The teller calls his bluff and says his gun is not real. Florida Man™ leaves without money and is promptly arrested for being a dumbass source: news4jax.com \| share:	35

Fri May 21, 2021
		As proof that Trump did NOT incite the Capitol insurrection, Florida congressman accidentally admits to being a co-conspirator source: twitter.com \| share:	110
		In the rush to keep Democrats from voting, the GOP didn't quite think through how their cunning plan to rig elections laws could possibly backfire source: politicususa.com \| share:	40
		Florida State Rep Anthony Sabatini claims Socrates "would be cancelled real quick" today. Should we tell him? source: twitter.com \| share:	126
		Ron DeSantis promises that he has only begun to grift source: cnn.com \| share:	19

Thu May 20, 2021
		The General rule is that a sitting or former Cabinet secretary can only be forced to sit for a deposition if there are "extraordinary circumstances" to justify it. A judge ruled those exist in a case about how Cruella DeVos handled loan forgiveness source: politico.com \| share:	29
		Researchers find the origins of a colony of monkeys in south Florida. In other news, there is a colony of monkeys in south Florida source: wjactv.com \| share:	53
		Aaaaaannnnd...here come the potential hurricanes source: nbcmiami.com \| share:	38
		Woman practices 'self care' in the back seat of a car at a dealership in Minnesota. It takes the cops an hour to coax her out of the vehicle. Gotta read the article to find out why we went with the Florida tag source: msn.com \| share:	80
		Former MLB pitcher on trial for sexually assaulting a minor uses the "I carded her" defense source: wpxi.com \| share:	24
		The GOP-controlled FL legislature passed a casino gaming bill that allows them to grant a Casino license to anyone whose proposed site is more than 15 miles from the Seminole Tribes' current casino. Guess who owns a golf club 15.2 miles away? source: thehill.com \| share:	65

Wed May 19, 2021
		Florida's attempt at nullifying federal immigration law is sent to its room without dinner source: lawandcrime.com \| share:	11
		Could be that the camel's nose of the law is into the tent of the Florida blogger for this humpday Wednesday. Let's watch in an MSNBC discussion thread for 7pm Eastern source: msnbc.com \| share:	244
		Grab the cornbread and pass the sweet tea, please source: foodandwine.com \| share:	26
		In an annual migration as old as time, a flock of braying spiteful geese have migrated North for the summer, to spread hate and feces all over their ancestral golf course source: cnn.com \| share:	46
		As Texas deals with seasonal flooding, a new threat emerges: Alligators on the loose source: 12newsnow.com \| share:	42
		Heated argument between two friends about Tom Brady lands one in jail. Too bad they couldn't just deflate the situation before the cops were called source: nbcmiami.com \| share:	46
		Florida man hid cocaine in his anus. I guess a drug charge would've rectum source: nbc-2.com \| share:	22

Tue May 18, 2021
		Florida man got into collecting baseball cards at age 33, died at 73, left his collection to his family, who're going to auction them off. Fark: Includes Ty Cobb, Lou Gehrig, Honus Wagner, Ted Williams, Cy Young and a Babe Ruth rookie card source: wfla.com \| share:	35
		Sorry hangry gator. This is a Wendy's source: wfla.com \| share:	17
		Four Seasons Miami sued over year long Covid furloughs. You'd think landscapers in the south would have full employment even during a pandemic source: news.bloomberglaw.com \| share:	1
		"Can a boy kicked off the Duke golf team grow up to run the Empire State? Can the spawn of a senescent fascist enabler redeem the family name in Albany?" P.S. Duke sucks source: syracuse.com \| share:	70
		PPProud Boys source: salon.com \| share:	27
		Shooting yourself in right thigh while picking up case of soda in Walmart is bad enough. But to NOT have concealed weapon permit for said gun in state where they practically grow on trees makes you candidate for Top Florida Man of 2021 source: wfla.com \| share:	64

Mon May 17, 2021
		Newt joins the growing pile of MAGA deadwood drifting to Florida and the time is about ripe for Bugs to get out his big saw source: dailykos.com \| share:	49
		It's Monday. How about some good news for two of Fark's favorite states? source: foodandwine.com \| share:	9
		Since Matt Gaetz has the hookers covered, Gov DeSantis is trying to deliver on the blackjack source: politico.com \| share:	52
		"Mangrove lodged into his head" is apparently what you get when you let the fish and wildlife commission play cause-of-death MadLibs source: msn.com \| share:	33
		"DeSantis can't". That sounds good, I already want a second plate please source: mediaite.com \| share:	63
		Florida man who used Samurai sword to commit burglary and carjacking caught after he left cell phone full of photos and videos of himself at crime scene source: tampabay.com \| share:	16

Sun May 16, 2021
		Johnny Sex Cup playoffs Day 2: Will Trotz befuddle the Pens? Will Wild/Knights be a wild afternoon? Will the Florida Fracas be farking Thunderdome? And then there's the pointlessness of regular season Canucks/Flames. 1st puck @ Noon ET. Hush, Pierre source: nhl.com \| share:	809
		Big pharma executives were concerned about people being negatively affected by their products. Just kidding, they called them Pillbillies source: theguardian.com \| share:	60
		Father of the Florida Lottery dies at ... 1 ... 0 ... 0 source: news4jax.com \| share:	10

Fri May 14, 2021
		'Hero' tag trumps 'Florida' and 'Woofday' tags in this case source: huffpost.com \| share:	12
		Stacey Abrams is the queen of truth bombs source: mediaite.com \| share:	47
		Georgia woman takes on Florida. Finds it a drag source: local10.com \| share:	26
		Coronavirus, meet Florida Man source: twitter.com \| share:	65
		NASA to launch rocket this weekend that will release a chemical that lights up the sky over Florida. Man, these gender reveals are getting out of hand source: clickorlando.com \| share:	25
		DeSantis could protect Trump from extradition, but he'd be stuck in the state forever source: politicususa.com \| share:	81

Thu May 13, 2021
		Donald Duck's mask to go the way of his pants source: wdwnt.com \| share:	3
		Florida Man found hiding under pool deck after going off the deep end while driving source: clickorlando.com \| share:	6
		COVID 19, New York Yankees 7. 6 aymptomatic cases breakthrough to major leagues source: cnn.com \| share:	18
		How do you do, fellow students? source: ajc.com \| share:	23
		Florida Man: I dare you to arrest me. Florida cop: OK source: deadstate.org \| share:	45
		Someone actually follows Florida Man around to see what he does all day. Just a carjacking, a hit-and-run and a robbery inside a grocery store source: actionnewsjax.com \| share:	1
		Palm Beach preparing for V-T Day source: politico.com \| share:	69
		Sean Hannity: "God created us to provide goods and services for others." If so, then it's clear that God didn't create Sean Hannity source: mediamatters.org \| share:	81
		Florida man hoarding gas determined to go out in blaze of glory source: chronicleonline.com \| share:	62