headlines found matching 'Crime' NEW To Fark? Find Out HOW TO FARKX
| Wed May 26, 2021 |
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Fukuoka man with powerful hunger for rice and yakisoba arrested for stealing electricity from convenience store to plug in his portable stove and rice cooker
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'Frazier used his personal cell phone to photograph evidence at the scene without approval, he did not collect a portion of the ear as evidence, and failed to complete a Domestic Violence Risk Assessment.' Wait, whaaat evidence?
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In one and only one universe, "Crime Scene Kitchen" is a real game show and it really does star Joel McHale
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Atlanta councilman had his car stolen while attending a ribbon-cutting event. Crime has already been mentioned as an issue in this year's city elections
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One-legged man loses ass-kicking contest
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Walkers stumble across £80m worth of cocaine worth Sussex beach. Rick Grimes is on the case
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Driver arrested Monday night for driving into a group of protestors, and this is the weirdest coincidence, has a history of communicating threats, ethnic intimidation, carrying concealed weapons, and pointing a gun
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| Tue May 25, 2021 |
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Shade the middle part of the Venn diagram of America's social ills as shots fired near George Floyd remembrance
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Please note: if you're going to come to Seattle from Alaska to riot and try to burn down police stations, you probably shouldn't wear 'distinctive pink camouflage pants' because that's a fashion crime
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🎶 My Maserati does 185 / Get out of my way and you'll stay alive / If you don't, finna pull out my gat / shoot you in the head, how bout dat? 🎶
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FedEx driver arrested for dumping packages. From the booking photo, it looks like she's still dumping
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Please note: in spite of ongoing efforts across the country, is still currently illegal to run over protesters in your car, as this North Carolina woman has found out
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On this day in history, in 1895, Oscar Wilde went to prison for sodomy. No, that was the charge, not why he went there. You know what I mean
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Dylann Roof's defense team argues that his deeply seated conservative beliefs make him ineligible for the death penalty
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Here's a thought: maybe don't post pictures of yourself pumping iron when you're receiving disability insurance
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Proof the Onion predicts the future: Area Man Passionate Enforcer of What He Imagines the Law to be
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| Mon May 24, 2021 |
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Cops: Florida Man used slice of pizza as weapon
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NYPD puts out an all out M&M bulletin for the candy bandit
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Anything can be a weapon, if you're Florida enough
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Yeah you got teeth .... a taser, ah hell no
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Man arrested after trying to run over cops, driving into police station lobby, and attacking police officers prompts investigation from Sherwin-Williams paint scientists to identify the whitest shade of white known to man
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The only definitive ranking of every musical guest from the last season of SNL that you'll ever need, going all the way from number 1 to as-yet-unprosecuted crime against humanity that was Morgan Wallen's appearance
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Polls of NY Voters about next year's gubernatorial contest show they'd prefer the crime fighter taking down Trump and the NRA to the creepy perv who botched the Covid response, but either one would crush any hypothetical Republican challenger
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Their uniforms will be blue armbands, Bermuda shorts with black socks, and pith helmets
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Done before: Man attempts to run down cops with car. New: In the police station. In other news, Havre de Grace has moved closer to Baltimore than when subby lived there
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Florida Woman: "Hold my beer and HANG ON"
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1/6 Insurrectionist: Hey media, I will sell you this exclusive video I shot inside the Capitol during the attack. Various media: Okay, here's over $90k. Feds: *yoink* We'll be taking that as "proceeds of a crime"
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| Fri May 14, 2021 |
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A woman driving a van... Decided to run down a man. She now sits in jail, she couldn't make bail. Nor did she think out her plan
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Anyone taking bets on what race this guy is? Anyone?
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Look, if you're going to steal 14 cases of beer, at least make it something worth the risk
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Man who is accused of killing his missing wife submitted a ballot for her because he wanted Trump to win
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Police were initially suspicious because a video store was still in business in this day and age
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CVS worker arrested for trying to give out fake vaccination cards
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San Diego police officer reach out to help connect homeless man to vital services... no, wait, scratch that - they tackle him for urinating in public and repeatedly punch him in the face before hauling him off to jail
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There are crimes against humanity. And then there's Toto's Africa, on repeat, forever, in Africa
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DeSantis could protect Trump from extradition, but he'd be stuck in the state forever
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| Fri May 07, 2021 |
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In case you thought The Wire couldn't be more realistic, one of the actors was shot for real in Baltimore
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Thousands of cockroaches on the menu at restaurant to settle debt dispute between owner and local criminals, patrons not amused
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If you're gonna go around stealing mail, don't do it in a loud ass muscle car with no license plates.... on second thought, yeah, go ahead and do that
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If at first you don't succeed. Florida Man style
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FBI informants committed more than 9,600 crimes under the bureau's supervision during President Trump's first two years in office
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2,000-year-old marble head of Rome's first emperor found. Another august discovery of an unspeakable tragedy to add to Medusa's list of crimes
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Who among us has not been in the middle of Army Basic Training and said to ourselves "I'm going to take this rifle, hop the fence, steal a bus and get the hell out of here. My recruiter lied to me. This ain't like Call of Duty"
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If you're going to crash a funeral by running the procession off the road, at least be polite and bring firearms and heroin to the reception
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Time to crack some white collar heads, Merrick
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| Tue May 04, 2021 |
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Lazy crook tries to snatch purse while driving a Uhaul. Continues with a slow speed police chase and a demolition derby
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A soul-crushing display as Korean-American Representative Michelle Steel (R) feels it necessary to apologize for reaching across the aisle to Katie Porter to pass an anti-hate crime bill
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Crazy lady assaults someone with billiard balls, cue sticks, cookie sheets, DVD Player, loaded rifle, and a knife. Mad Kung Fu skills or advanced game of Clue?
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"Far right crime hits record high in Germany". The 1940's would like a recount
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Federal judge to DOJ: Hey, so what's this memo that Barr cited to justify not charging Trump for Obstruction of Justice? Produce for us ASAP
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What has six legs and is sticky?
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Nintendo contracts shown in court appear to have more redacts than the Mueller documents, but apparently, they REALLY want to make sure their partners have no organized crime connections. Did Mario and Luigi get background checks?
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Never 'drive' in the left lane. Especially don't drive in the left lane for over a mile while there is no one to pass when you have 150 pounds of cocaine in your car, it will give the police a reason to stop you and then they will find probable cause
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♪ Shot in the face ♫ ♪ It's all part of the game ♫ ♪ that gives BB guns a bad name. ♪ ♫
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Did you really think Law & Order spinoffs were DUN DUN?
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Man charged with stealing a garbage truck, crashing it into an airport parking lot pillar. Mugshot of driver looks to be exactly the type of person you would expect to steal a garbage truck and crash it into an airport parking lot pillar
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Racist has it her way by throwing a Whopper and picking up a felony
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| Wed April 28, 2021 |
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PA State Police trooper: "If an individual [...] says, 'No, I don't want you to search my car,' it could be an additional indicator [of illegal activity]," said to motorist who refused his request for a search while trooper is searching his car
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Qrocidile Dundee is my new supervillain crossover
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On this day in history, in 1789, Fletcher Christian led a mutiny on the HMS Bounty, an act of naval crime later repeated on the HMCS Scott, the USS Brawny, and the CNS Great Value
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| Fri April 16, 2021 |
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World-class mastermind unsuccessfully tries to ram a truck into a store to steal healthful, liberating, and empowering substance, then shoots a bystander who tried to stop the burglary
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NY man calls medical facility to report lost cocaine, gets arrested
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Lawyer for the Chicago cop who fatally shot 13-year-old Adam Toledo said it was "amazing and disheartening" that "very few" people had asked how the officer was doing
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Nothing to see here... just a woman going into a punching-and-biting rampage over a mask
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The Geneva Convention calls "killing a combatant who, having laid down his arms or having no longer means of defence, has surrendered at discretion" a war crime. The Chicago Police Union head calls actions like that "justified and actually heroic"
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And now an explanation of the crimes Trump committed as confirmed by the FBI yesterday
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A man wearing a mask broke into a home where an old man lives, and demanded money. The old man shot the intruder multiple times, and is now suffering life-threatening injuries. Old man: "I didn't know the suspect was my own grandson"
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"Underage girl stabbed by high school, another girl in custody." Why is another girl in custody when the high school did it?
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"Underage girl stabbed by high school, another girl in custody." Why is another girl in custody when the high school did it?
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| Tue April 13, 2021 |
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Good news Ohioans: It's now legal to conceal carry brass knuckles, sandbags and cestuses
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Ben and Jerry's issues a statement condemning the shooting of Daunte Wright, which probably means the release of "Stop Resisting...This Delicious Ice Cream" is cancelled
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The chief of the Bridgeport, Connecticut police is given a one-year prison sentence for rigging the hiring process for... the chief of the Bridgeport, Connecticut police
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Headline writers of Ireland, this is your day to shine
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Pepper spray is a salt
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The Bourne Retirement: Local homeowner claims his yard display that features a man hanging from a noose "isn't rooted in racism." Bourne "isn't buying it " and "will bring this fight to his doorstep"
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After being kicked out by his grandmother and threatening to set a woman's house on fire, Florida Man cannot resist the allure of the sirens of the retention pond
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Democrats Triple-dog dare Republicans to filibuster the pending anti Asian-American hate crime bill, creating a slight breach of etiquette by skipping "the triple-dare-you" and going right for the throat
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Good: Seeing female blonde, early 30s, handy with a knife, familiarity with plumbing, medical and legal experience on a dating site. Since you are seeing this here... well, you know
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"I would love to know the motivation of stealing a truck that's very, very easy to spot and doesn't go very fast. What do you think you're going to do with a truck like that?" Once you pop, you can't stop
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Brooklyn Center passed a resolution forbidding BCPD from using crowd control tactics like kettling, rubber bullets, tear gas, and mass arrests. 15 minutes later, BCPD decides they're above that law too
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Like camping in Texas? It's about to become a crime
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Poor lady had to fill out a police report for $700 in cash, various bank cards, and sex toys valued at around $160. I mean they caught the guy, but still, I don't think she's getting it all back
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No republicans support the Covid hate crime bill
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