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headlines found matching 'Comment'
Fri July 23, 2021
(Insider)
 
 
 
Well, I guess now we know why the Trump administration screwed up the response to the Covid-19 pandemic so badly. They went to Jared
source: insider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
It's what the Internet is for, after all
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 22, 2021
(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
St. Louis just royally farked up a couple dozen homicide prosecutions, but not to worry - it's not a big murder town, according to city spokesman Ian Faith
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 21, 2021
(CBC)
 
 
 
'Cronwall'? That makes no sense...I live in Cornwall. Better keep driving
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
'Cronwall'? That makes no sense...I live in Cornwall. Better keep driving
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deseret News)
 
 
 
Is the COVID-19 vaccine riskier than the coronavirus? What a new poll suggests. Wait, opinions get to dictate that kind of thing? That said, the comments section backs up the article nice and horrifically
source: deseret.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
"Better ten days of love than years of regretting." -Robert Jordan. Even worse is only having ten days to get your Fark Fiction Anthology submission finished. This is your Fark Writer's Thread, The Wheel of Procrastination and Regret edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Hoes gonna hoe
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Hoes gonna hoe
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 20, 2021
(ABC News)
 
 
 
CDC reports Delta variant now responsible for 83% of Covid-19 cases. TVA unavailable for comment
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
The most boring farking movie in existence?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Those of you worrying about buying your Tiffany rings from Costco can breathe a little easier now. And don't forget to grab a rotisserie chicken and a 3 gal vat of mayo for dinner
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 19, 2021
(CNN)
 
 
 
After causing the crash that led Max Verstappen to the hospital, Lewis Hamilton has received a ton of 'N' comments on social media
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
"Hey guys, I didn't mean that FACEBOOK was killing people, just the bad guys that use Facebook. Can you unlock my FarmVille account now, please"
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Movie theater employee shocks the masses by exposing the hidden truth: "nacho cheese is not home made"
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Movie theater employee shocks the masses by exposing the hidden truth: "nacho cheese is not home made"
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
South Korean president cancels visit to Japan following masturbation joke that rubs him the wrong way
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Stanley Cup fixed in Montreal, returned to Tampa. Like hosing down the ice, it is a hockey tradition that the losers repair any damage to the Cup
source: canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
Tom Brady and his team could receive a major punishment from the NFL for cheating. This is not a repeat from 2007, 2015, or any other year
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun July 18, 2021
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
German Chancellor Angela Merkel shocked by 'surreal' devastation in recent floods, still waiting on response to 'baroque' and 'Impressionist' devastation
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 16, 2021
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Boothe supports secession. This is not a repeat from 1861
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Today's racist one-man militia prevented from executing a MAGA terror attack comes from California
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 15, 2021
(Tennessee Holler)
 
 
 
TN decides to fight back against allegation of improper firing of top vaccine expert Dr. Michelle Fiscus by accusing her of trying to direct funds earmarked for non-profits to a non-profit
source: tnholler.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Arkansas citizens wish they had closed the barn door now that the horses are shiatting all over the place
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 46 Atlanta)
 
 
 
Dump truck strikes bridge, shifts it six feet
source: cbs46.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Finally Find fun and frolic festively for Fursday is here
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
HBO to James Gandolfini: We're going to make you an offer you can't refuse
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback takes a big hit
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 14, 2021
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Soon you'll be able to roll up your TV when done watching it. Not you, Farker reading this headline, but maybe your work's CEO or President will be able to
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
TSA agent accused of taking unauthorized photos of female travelers, instead of just fondling them per standard procedure
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
CEO Mark Zuckerberg reportedly told colleagues that they "Should have a crush" on FB COO because "she had good skin" Apparently his AI software was good enough to keep him from adding "that I want to wear like a cape"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
France celebrates Bastille Day. Rush unavailable for comment
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFSB Connecticut)
 
 
 
New CT law mandates that adults going in the rear must use protection
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
 
 
 
We were trendsetters, a decade ahead of our time, and we should be recognized as such
source: triblive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 13, 2021
(NBC News)
 
 
 
If you are upset over an airline's bag fee you a) take the bus, b) write a complaint, c) make a fake bomb threat. In related news: Canada man can morph into Florida man if he is exposed to the state for too long
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Chris Cuomo declines to comment on why his wife's name would be in Jeffrey Epstein's "older" black book because maybe, you know, he likes it
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Twitter verifies at least six fake accounts including cat. "The cat could not be reached for comment to defend himself". Presumably, the comment would be "meow meow meow meow meow meow"
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 12, 2021
(CBC)
 
 
 
Name checks out
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Name checks out
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Iggy Pop to narrate documentary on King Tut. Steve Martin unavailable for comment
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun July 11, 2021
(Reading Eagle)
 
 
 
Maybe this place needs a redesign?
source: readingeagle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
French fries: Serious business
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat July 10, 2021
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Weed can kill. Plastic baggie unavailable for comment
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 09, 2021
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Apparently Rupert Murdoch personally made the decision to call Arizona for Biden and told his son "Fark him" when Lachlan told him that call would anger Trump
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Dua Lipa, who is not a Star Wars expanded universe character, sued for sharing a paparazzi photo of herself
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
"If only someone had told us you can get really sick and die from COVID we would have gotten vaccinated"
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Just watched Night Stalker, a documentary about serial killer Richard Ramirez. Do you think killers are born or raised? Why?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Just watched Night Stalker, a documentary about serial killer Richard Ramirez. Do you think killers are born or raised? Why?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSTP St. Paul)
 
 
 
White farmers file lawsuit, claiming Biden's loan forgiveness program discriminates against them
source: kstp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 08, 2021
(Vancouver Sun)
 
 
 
Socialist Canada making child care $10/day as it's "not a luxury for families it is a necessity"
source: vancouversun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vancouver Sun)
 
 
 
Socialist Canada making child care $10/day as it's "not a luxury for families it is a necessity"
source: vancouversun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
A major fundraising group for GOP women compares Representatives Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga.) and Lauren Boebert (R-Colo.) to carnival barkers. Litigation from angry members of The International Union of Carnival Barkers is pending
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Souʎ dnlls ɐp ɟǝɐʇnɹᴉuƃ ndsᴉpǝ-poʍu ԀSϛ
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Indicted Trump organization CFO Allen Weisselberg is fired as a director of Trump's Aberdeenshire golf course, because, if there is one thing the Trump family won't tolerate, it's a dishones--yeah, no can't finish that with a straight face
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Insider trading is okay when the Speaker's husband does it
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's your inaugural Fark Fursday Thread. Rawr
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's your inaugural Fark Fursday Thread. Rawr
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PC Gamer)
 
 
 
Minecraft is now R-rated in South Korea. ooo pixelated boobies?
source: pcgamer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Nvidia's 40X0 line rumored to be more than twice as impossible to buy as 30X0 line
source: notebookcheck.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
In which we learn that "class action lawsuit" nonsense was intended to distract from Trump's Bedminister golf club settling with NJ ABC over liquor license violations that led to a fatal DUI crash, including a $400K fine they have to pay in installments
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Brave TikToker shows us how to deal with a barefoot airline passenger who puts their foot on your armrest
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 07, 2021
(Politico (Europe))
 
 
 
Belgium "urgently recalls" its ambassador to South Korea, after his wife is involved in a fight with a Korean serviceworker....again
source: politico.eu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
The insurrection was planned piece by piece, but every step was treacherous, especially for those that were barefoot
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"Will she roll on anybody?" asked the completely innocent former president
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Connecticut Post)
 
 
 
Ordered to hand over documents, gun manufacturer sends Facebook minion memes instead
source: ctpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Comic Book Movie)
 
 
 
Marvel seeks people of color, diversity for MCU reboot. Heck, go all in: Make it a musical with Lin-Manuel Miranda, Phillipa Soo, Daveed Diggs & Chris Jackson as The Fantastic Four-fathers. Jonathan Groff as a singing Dr. Doom alone would sell it out
source: comicbookmovie.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 06, 2021
(Fark)
 
 
 
The Tuesday Night Science Channel Discussion Thread, 9PM Eastern
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical Xpress)
 
 
 
Using therapeutic writing for empowerment without revisiting trauma. No, not flimsy half-assed Fark headlines - save your whole-assed gold for the comments
source: medicalxpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Robert Downey Jr. unfollows all his Marvel co-stars. This means something. This is important
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun July 04, 2021
(WFSB Connecticut)
 
 
 
Apparently the key to pulling a gun on the cops and not getting shot is wearing diapers
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat July 03, 2021
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
DOJ investigating soft salary cap policy that punishes teams who pay players too much. Why is this in the Fandom tab and not Sports? Because gaming
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 02, 2021
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Hell's Kitchen project to provide GM with lithium from the Salton Sea. No comment yet from Gordon Ramsay
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
That smell you're smelling is The Stupid burning. And pork slider diarrhea, but mostly The Stupid
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
That smell you're smelling is The Stupid burning. And pork slider diarrhea, but mostly The Stupid
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 01, 2021
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Caddy sacked
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 5 Cleveland)
 
 
 
"What, am I going to get fired over this?"
source: news5cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Another one bites the dust
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 30, 2021
(WPRI Rhode Island)
 
 
 
Seekonk man, whose shirt was really chafing him, would like you to know he is a documentarian, and would not like to comment on photos the FBI released of him destroying press cameras at the capitol on Jan 6
source: wpri.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Scientist checking lake for invasive plants finds invasive 1991 Pontiac Safari
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Times)
 
 
 
Teens report teacher for frequently making sexual comments in class, discover being right still means one can lose
source: projects.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 29, 2021
(MSN)
 
 
 
Earliest known strain of plague could have come from a beaver bite. Dag and Norbert unavailable for comment
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Rudy Giuliani is being investigated over Turkish lobbying. Man, I didn't even know they did landscaping
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Artistic octopus paints with tentacles at Florida Aquarium. And yet, when I try to paint with an octopus, everyone acts all horrified
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Parler joins the resistance
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
It's not often the asinine tag drags a submission out from the Food tab, but 'Bread Steak' should do it
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
No, Jason Statham is not expected to provide launch commentary. Falcon 9 sends up the Transporter-2 mission from Cape Canaveral, with a return to launch site landing. Launch window opens at 2:56 pm EDT
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Onion)
 
 
 
TOTALLY not an allegory
source: theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Onion)
 
 
 
TOTALLY not an allegory
source: theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Roger Stone urges Trump to ditch his "weak-kneed" lawyers and hire one tough attorney to fight the potential charges against him. Difficulty: good attorneys like to get paid
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
The only good part of Dexter is returning for the revival
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
Tucker, the NSA isn't spying on you to get you cancelled, but if you were talking to hostile foreign intelligence to get your talking points and scripts for your shows, then you've likely been picked up in intercepts. Just saying
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Conservatives in Canada decide to just go full MAGA
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
How do you turn a Dodge Challenger into a Dodge Charger? Ask this guy. (PIC)
source: starlocalmedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 28, 2021
(CTV News)
 
 
 
EhSIS
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Working from home doesn't mean you don't have to pay your state taxes
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
YouTube permits right-wing disinformation groups to share videos, bans left-wing watchdog of right-wing disinformation groups from sharing videos
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 27, 2021
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Anti-vaxxers don't want to be bossed around by the Boss on Broadway... ♪ On Broadway
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 25, 2021
(Fark)
 
 
 
Any Farkers missing Shameless? Pitch your idea for a (never-gonna-happen) spin-off series. So far Subby's come up with: "Kev & V Go To Kentucky", "Carl's Alibi", "Ian & Micky Adopt A Baby", and "Debbie Does Child Endangerment"
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Any Farkers missing Shameless? Pitch your idea for a (never-gonna-happen) spin-off series. So far Subby's come up with: "Kev & V Go To Kentucky", "Carl's Alibi", "Ian & Micky Adopt A Baby", and "Debbie Does Child Endangerment"
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Glendale city council meeting minutes: "[The mayor] then told me to eat sh*t and die...Sir, if you'd like to kick my ass, I'd be happy to meet you in any boxing gym in the Valley, put on the gloves...and I'll give you a shot at the title"
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Madness descends upon Glasgow, Scotland concerning the Govanhill Sock Mystery, you see there are socks hanging on a clothesline ALL ALONE
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC4i)
 
 
 
'Shoppers report finding women's underpants on car door handles at Westerville Aldi'
source: nbc4i.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 24, 2021
(AP News)
 
 
 
Winston Marshall quits Mumford and Sons to become anti-mask political commentator. But if it means one fewer Mumford and Son/banjo player in the world, I'd call it a wash
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Western Mass News)
 
 
 
When it comes to pressurized oxygen tanks, it's Righty, Tighty Lefty, Loosey. Not Bangy, Boomy
source: westernmassnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 23, 2021
(The Hill)
 
 
 
So brutal that it's almost beautiful. NRA President David Keene and gun lobbyist John Lott tricked into giving self-serving inspirational speech to their victims
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Iranian news agency channels the Beastie Boys, pointing to drone attack on nuclear facilities and saying "Listen all y'all"
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 22, 2021
(Fark)
 
 
 
The Tuesday Night Science Channel Discussion Thread, 9PM Eastern
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Unilad)
 
 
 
Woman who claimed she gave birth to 10 babies in the same pregnancy admitted to psychiatric ward. Octomom unavailable for comment
source: unilad.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Beaver takes Canadian flag, presumably to use as hockey stick while eating poutine
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vancouver Sun)
 
 
 
Canadian power companies during heatwave: hey Texas, watch and learn. Tag is for all those with working A/C
source: vancouversun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Russia bans Bard College, claims they've gone rogue. Just wait until the wizard finds out
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 21, 2021
(CNN)
 
 
 
Corporate swine at Smithfield went whole-hog on bacon shortage lie
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
What's your real life closest encounter with the paranormal?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 20, 2021
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Honestly, who throws a sofa?
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 19, 2021
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
All ten fans of Batman Forever want to see the Schumacher Cut released
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 18, 2021
(YouGov)
 
 
 
Moon bugs? Seriously? Who the hell calls them moon bugs?
source: today.yougov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
"I probably should have retired a week earlier", American translation: "I'm gettin too old for this sh*t"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
"I probably should have retired a week earlier", American translation: "I'm gettin too old for this sh*t"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Herald Online)
 
 
 
Phil Mickelson went "SERSLAH?" to fans during his disastrous opening round at the US Open: IDK BFF Jill unavailable for comment
source: heraldonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 17, 2021
(Variety)
 
 
 
Of all the movies you've thought Hollywood should reboot, I'll almost guarantee this one never made your top 100. Jefferson Twilight unavailable for comment
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Syracuse Post-Standard)
 
 
 
It would be a shame if I accidentally revealed what I know about your brother the governor. Now, about those legal fees
source: syracuse.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Spotify goes soft(core)
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Llama drama comes to an end with no trauma. Yo momma
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Llama drama comes to an end with no trauma. Yo momma
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
The witnesses and store employees were clearly impressed yet terrified by the sparks emitting from his brass balls
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
What's the weirdest way you've been injured? Tag is for subby
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Comments: Instead of bobcat, zoo contained nothing. Would not visit again
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 16, 2021
(Austin News KXAN)
 
 
 
Austin Police Department didn't even bother to investigate itself in order to find no wrongdoing by their officers
source: kxan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Kayne West "likes where things are headed" in his new relationship with supermodel Irina Shayk
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox Business)
 
 
 
Following on from the Mona Lisa petition, there's now a petition to deny Bezos re-entry from his space flight
source: foxbusiness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
That's a bold strategy Cotton, let's see how that statement works out
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
At least the Cheddar Bay Biscuits are sustainable
source: mainepublic.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Ricky Schroder fights for right to prove he is an idiot (among a sea of idiots)
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NASA)
 
 
 
Total eclipse helps shed light on solar winds. Still no word of effect on the heart. Bright Eyes unavailable for comment
source: nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Frogs, diners, beer promotions, and Star Trek actors are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 30-June 5 The Razor Blade Model Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
CBC editor shuts off Facebook comments, releases statement saying "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE? GO ENJOY YOUR WEEKEND"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Why did MTG suddenly visit the Holocaust Museum and apologize for (that particular bit of) her nonsense? Probably to take the edge of hypocrisy off her party as they try to bring down Ilhan Omar for her own comments
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Don't mess with Jared
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 15, 2021
(Blabbermouth)
 
 
 
Alex Lifeson marks the release of his signature Epiphone Les Paul by releasing two new songs; it is the first new music he's released in a decade
source: blabbermouth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
On this day in newspaper history, 1985, it is reported that the Old Cola Drinkers of America filed a federal suit against Coca-Cola, demanding that New Coke no longer be packaged like the old Coke and for Coca-Cola to return its original formula
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Finally, a gigantic ark that makes sense
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Finally, a gigantic ark that makes sense
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
So how was lunch?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
So how was lunch?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Bar refuses to serve two women for wearing tops that "made them look topless". After careful analysis, the tops didn't make them look topless, but this may require further study (NSFW)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 14, 2021
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
This is important, you guys
source: hitc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi now says she and her fellow Democrats didn't rebuke Omar for her controversial comments -- we thanked her. Yeah, that's it
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouGov)
 
 
 
10,000 Americans were asked how many meals they could make without looking at a recipe. The answer is good news for the restaurant industry
source: today.yougov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blabbermouth)
 
 
 
Dave Ellefson's longtime business partner ejaculates...I mean evacuates from the music industry
source: blabbermouth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
GOP Minority Leader McCarthy to throw some meat to his fellow Republicans, expected for force vote on stripping Rep. Ilhan Omar of committee assignments for her controversial comments
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
So about that fisherman supposedly swallowed by a whale. Supposedly being the key word here
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 13, 2021
(Salon)
 
 
 
Want that sweet wacky weed delivered to your doorstep? Why you must support slavery then
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Want that sweet wacky weed delivered to your doorstep? Why you must support slavery then
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Le'Veon Bell burns a bridge with a team he plays for. This is not a repeat from 2018
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 12, 2021
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The Queen will now call BS on any BS stories made about her, overturning longstanding policy of not commenting
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
YouTube temporarily bans another idiot for mass-posting COVID disinformation -- Sen. Ron Johnson
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 11, 2021
(CBC)
 
 
 
Police looking for entrepreneur who tried to disrupt insurance industry
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
We just had a deer in our back yard eating mulberries
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Rumors are persisting that underage youths and ne'er-do-wells are using fake IDs to gain access to the naughtiness going on at OnlyFans. It's not like they can find a stack of magazines hidden under a bush or THE ENTIRE INTERWEB
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 10, 2021
(NBC Montana)
 
 
 
Two dead in underground railroad crash. Harriet Tubman unavailable for comment
source: nbcmontana.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Was that who we think it was in the background in episode 1 of Loki? (link contains spoilers)
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBUR Boston)
 
 
 
Not news: Republican state rep makes homophobic comment, anger ensues. News: Anger is from fellow Republicans. Fark: 29 out of 30 elected Republicans demand her resignation for comments. Bonus: Also demand resignation of party chair who defended her
source: amp.wbur.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
PA legislator, thundering against yet another anti-abortion bill pushed by a GOP caucus that is 100% white, in a chamber that is 70% male: "Your boos mean nothing, I've seen what makes you cheer." Comment stricken from the record, but not our hearts
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Panhandle)
 
 
 
Pilot arrested for buzzing over, nosediving toward crowd at Gulf Coast Jam Saturday, all to advertise his flight school. Lucky cops didn't shoot him down
source: mypanhandle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 09, 2021
(WPRI Rhode Island)
 
 
 
Kyle works at Dunkies with Sam who brewed with Alli at Starbucks who worked with Sanya at Peet's who worked with Chris at Honey Dew who baked donuts with Jim at Ma's who used to work at Sophie's in Exeter
source: wpri.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
"3 Injured in Possible Home Explosion in Evanston, Authorities Say" - owner Erwin Schrödinger unavailable for comment
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Nurse comments that the hospital was previously over capacity with patients. Comment made on her way out the door due a 2-week suspension. For not getting the COVID-19 vaccination
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
The UK will soon be getting dimmer. This is not a metaphor or wanker comment from a snarky Yank
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Time to do a shiatty 15-second dance; Biden just replaced Trump's TikTok ban
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Biogen faces tough questions about $56k price for new Alzheimer's drug, paying off Dennis Nedry. Dodgeson unavailable for comment
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Florida Woman, Disneyland, snack foods, and kids books are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 23-29: Homemade Ice Cream Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Florida Woman, Disneyland, snack foods, and kids books are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 23-29: Homemade Ice Cream Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
New York Times tries to cover up the fact that watermelons were found on Mars
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 08, 2021
(KOAT Albuquerque)
 
 
 
A New Mexico-made chimichanga is named as one of the best foods you can get at gas stations. Subby wants Deadpool's comment on this (link in article goes to list of foods, btw)
source: koat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Bald Guy)
 
 
 
With restaurants back in business, here's an important question: What would you do if you found a HAIR in your food?
source: yougov.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 07, 2021
(Variety)
 
 
 
What if I told you Christina Ricci took the red pill
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Burger King enters the chicken sandwich wars by mocking Chick-Fil-A's bigotry and donating to an LGBTQ group
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Head of NASA: "We'll start investigating UFOs now." Project Blue Book unavailable for comment
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
This math trick goes to 11. Share any math tricks you know. Note: Using a calculator doesn't count (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 06, 2021
(Fark)
 
 
 
What useless superpower do you have? Subby regularly spontaneously teleports his keys, wallets, cellphones and pens to random other parts of his home. Still more impressive than Hawkeye and Black Widow
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Chris Wallace checks Corey Lewandowski for election lies and sore losing
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Rand Paul (R) claims he recieves death threats amid clashes with Dr. Fauci. Rand Paul's neighbor unavailable for comment
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 05, 2021
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Snakes found on a motherfarking plane. Samuel L Jackson unavailable for comment
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
GoldenCry 007
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Study finds that giving people money during a pandemic reduces poverty. Bootstraps unavailable for comment
source: money.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ottawa Citizen)
 
 
 
"We cannot say for certain what might have caused her injury or how long she had been suffering for. But we are very happy that she and her little family are safe." Welcome to Caturday
source: ottawacitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Don't you just hate it when your neighbours start using their bees as weapons?
source: kentlive.news   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press of Atlantic City)
 
 
 
Takeoff checklist probably should include making sure no key parts have been re-installed upside down and backwards
source: pressofatlanticcity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 04, 2021
(YouGov)
 
 
 
Mercury is in retrograde right now until June 22 ... and one in three people think this actually means something
source: today.yougov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Scientific study finally establishes which generation is the most sensitive. Obvious answer to the left, comments by people who didn't read the article to the right
source: insidermag.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Remember how mad Tom Cruise was when MI:7 *almost* got shut down over COVID worries? Oh....he's gonna be very mad now
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 03, 2021
(Salon)
 
 
 
Roger Stone challenges Steve Bannon to a debate to take place on Stone's Infowars show to see which one is the true MAGA . This is your party in the 21st century, republicans
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Subby has gone through 3 bluetooth dongles in the past 5 months. 2 out of 3 had sporadic connectivity issues and overall all 3 were disappointing up until they failed. Can anyone recommend a decent PC bluetooth solution that won't break the bank?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Subby has gone through 3 bluetooth dongles in the past 5 months. 2 out of 3 had sporadic connectivity issues and overall all 3 were disappointing up until they failed. Can anyone recommend a decent PC bluetooth solution that won't break the bank?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Still probably as nutritious as the chicken
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Vegan outraged after she finds waiter's note in a menu "the vegan shiate is circled" following her giving him a list of demands and asking what food was safe for her to eat
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
UK may ban bosses from emailing employees who are off the clock. Spilling beer on the server and deleting the entire Politics tab queue still OK, if not encouraged
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Smokin' Jay Cutler is gonna get his, even if it's hers
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 02, 2021
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Minnesota catcher needed surgery after a foul tip into the Twins
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Minnesota catcher needed surgery after a foul tip into the Twins
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
While cleaning out the kids old playroom to convert it into a home office, Subby ripped out a bookshelf and found a lost book with a situationally appropriate title (DIT). What once lost and now found memories have you come across over the years?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Okay, so picked up Witcher 3 on a Steam sale...but my current PC lacks the cojones. Need advice on what kind of PC to pick up that can run it without breaking the bank. Awkward tag since Advice went the way of the dodo
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Controversy erupts over tight pants in Tanzanian parliament. Tanzanian Devil unavailable for comment
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Jackass director brings receipts to a judge of Bam Margera threatening violence against him and his children and was granted a restraining order in return
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Idaho family suing school district after girl is pushed down stairs in a reenactment of a Shakespeare play, proving that the fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stairs / But in ourselves
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 01, 2021
(Blabbermouth)
 
 
 
Bobbleheads of Jimi Hendrix setting his guitar on fire at Monterey Pop Festival in 1967 coming soon, in a limited run of 1,967. 'Scuse me, while I kiss this guy
source: blabbermouth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
The Tuesday Night Science Channel Discussion Thread, 9PM Eastern
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Hypothetical scenario: You receive an emergency alert. The zombie apocalypse is happening. You can grab one item from home to use as your primary weapon/tool. What do you bring? Difficulty: no guns. Bonus: post a pic of said item in the comments
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BNNBloomberg)
 
 
 
KKR and CD&R buy CLDR for 4.7B, QED
source: bnnbloomberg.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Financial Post)
 
 
 
Just like your blood sugar levels after you eat one, Krispy Kreme revenue surges ahead of planned IPO
source: financialpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Krispy Kreme has given away over 1.5 million doughnuts to vaccinated Americans. Homer Simpson unavailable for comment
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
In an interview Rep. Boebert (R-Salmonella) claimed Texas "has not seen a single Covid death" since lifting their mask mandate on Mar 2. She was only off by 3,650. Her Spokesman: CLEARLY what she meant was, "not a single Covid death THAT DAY, duh"
source: factcheck.thedispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Yacht owner who got screwed trying to sell his boat to Matt Gaetz details all the monkey business that went on. "Thirsty"
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 31, 2021
(Eat This Not That)
 
 
 
Fifteen McDonald's menu items that are gone for good. McRib unavailable for comment
source: eatthis.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Google your user name and fark. Post the headline and your comment from the top hit. Subby's is a random entertainment link from 4 years ago
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Google your user name and fark. Post the headline and your comment from the top hit. Subby's is a random entertainment link from 4 years ago
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Kayaker rescues red squirrel under attack from spawning bass in river
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Kayaker rescues red squirrel under attack from spawning bass in river
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 30, 2021
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Lithuanian city built 'portal' to another city to help keep people connected.GLaDOS unavailable for comment
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(eBay)
 
 
 
Are you a really big fan of Among Us? Do you like McNuggets? Got an extra $14K kickin around? There's a deal you might want to know about. PT Barnum unavailable for comment
source: ebay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 29, 2021
(Daily Gazette (Schenectady))
 
 
 
Sheep on the lam
source: dailygazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPTV Portland)
 
 
 
Robots in vineyards with fricken laser beams
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 28, 2021
(Yahoo)
 
Boobies
 
Salma Hayek has no plans to stop posting bikini photos. All right then. Carry on
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ARL Now)
 
 
 
Great job, Tucker. Thanks a bunch
source: arlnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 27, 2021
(CTV News)
 
 
 
. . . squeak . . . . . . . . . . . . squeak . . . . . . . . . . . . squeak
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Between fits of phony poutrage about "cancel culture", conservatives cancel one of their own for not sucking up to Trump enough. Life's been good
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
The Quebec legislature passes a motion demanding that the internet provide a flag emoji for the province
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
London's West End, 80s music, fast food, and social media influencers are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 9-15 Himalayan Salt Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
I've been suffering a rash of sock-holes recently. Any recommendations on where to find durable plain-ass socks online?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouGov)
 
 
 
Burgers, hot dogs, ribs, potato salad, corn on the cob, and baked beans: all you need for the perfect Memorial Day cookout. Trust us, the science is on our side. We have polling and everything
source: today.yougov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Food and Wine)
 
 
 
The 'DiGiornut' Is the pizza/donut mashup you've been focus group testing with your weed friends for years. Your dreams have become reality, but there's, like, a catch
source: foodandwine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Men's Health)
 
 
 
The internet responds to Thor skipping leg day
source: menshealth.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
At this point we should just end every sentence with "sorry" instead of a period, sorry
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
At this point we should just end every sentence with "sorry" instead of a period, sorry
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 26, 2021
(Variety)
 
 
 
Army of the Dead Pixels
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Food and Wine)
 
 
 
The Hallmark Channel now has its own hard seltzer. The farkin' Hallmark Channel. They refuse to comment on the rumors it's the same old re-treaded Zimas with new Jolly Ranchers rotated in and out
source: foodandwine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
The feud between Jimmy Kimmel and Kremlin Cruz is heating up
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Florida's new cancel culture law for social media companies could apply to Trump's shiatty blog the moment he allows comments
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
John Cena grovels before Winnie the Pooh
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 25, 2021
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
Someone let the air out of their balloon
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
My dad always said, "Don't force it. Get a bigger hammer." Now Google gets a bigger Rowhammer
source: security.googleblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"Next time you try to call out a referee trying to get a call being like, 'Come on, she 300 pounds', I'm going to need you to get it right. I'm weighing 235 pounds and I'm really, very proud of being a big biatch, a big buddy, big Benz baby"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Defense lawyers forget to flatten their PDF regarding seizing Rudy's electronics. Redactions easily removed by CNN. Hilarity results
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Montreal Gazette)
 
 
 
Trumpistan: Lose ur job? Lern to code snowflake LOL. Quebec: We'll pay you to learn to code. Some snow shoveling required
source: montrealgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Montreal Gazette)
 
 
 
Trumpistan: Lose ur job? Lern to code snowflake LOL. Quebec: We'll pay you to learn to code. Some snow shoveling required
source: montrealgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
A suspicious package is delivered to Ron Paul's house. He blames (a) Antifa, (b) The Squad, (c) 80s heart-throb Richard Marx
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Law and Crime)
 
 
 
Here's a thought: maybe don't post pictures of yourself pumping iron when you're receiving disability insurance
source: lawandcrime.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 24, 2021
(WYFF 4 Greenville)
 
 
 
Tyler Terry's Manhunt has ended. Madea has no comment
source: wyff4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ozarks First)
 
 
 
Homeowner wanted to improve his view of the lake and mountain, so he contracted a tree service to butcher over 100 trees. Fark: Ouachita National Recreation Trail in Arkansas. The trees were NOT on his property
source: ozarksfirst.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
I believe that government is a corrupt conspiracy trampling on the rights of Free and Sovereign citizens...which is why you should put me in charge of it
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
The US considered going nuclear on China in 1958 in an effort to protect Taiwan. Literally
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Quincy Jones calls Elvis Presley a racist, says he'd never have worked with him
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Italy's transport minister vows to find cause of a cable car disaster that killed 14 people. Gravity had no comment and referred all questions to its legal team
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
This man's weapon of choice against a spider? His cat
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 23, 2021
(News 10 Albany)
 
 
 
How gross is your state? Go ahead, brag it up. I've seen station wagons on fire off the shoulder of 95. I watched police lights glitter in the dark near the U.S. border. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to comment
source: news10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press of Atlantic City)
 
 
 
Area man hasn't eaten sugar or red meat in 40 years. His reward? "Perfect poop"
source: pressofatlanticcity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Human remains found in cemetery, water found in sea (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 21, 2021
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Maybe she was just going to return the money in about two weeks
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Russian police find trove of diamonds and gems from 2018 World Cup heist, admitting it was a multi-faceted operation
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Alex Rodriguez launches makeup for men. Ichiban spokesperson Joseph Tribbiani unavailable for comment
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
If you can't wait until the plane lands to start doing lines of coke, at least do it in the bathroom instead of in the aisle
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
GoFakeMe
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
AP reporter canceled by Republicans for calling Ben Shapiro a "little turd." Wait until they find out who Shapiro called a "Turd Tornado." Turd
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
AP reporter canceled by Republicans for calling Ben Shapiro a "little turd." Wait until they find out who Shapiro called a "Turd Tornado." Turd
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 20, 2021
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
The AZ voting machines being "audited" by CyberLoonies may never be used for another AZ election
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
$68 million is still not enough to take the career-ending job that is Head Coach of the Detroit Lions
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
Another one going down to prison town: Trump Organization CFO also now under criminal tax investigation
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
The NY Daily News comments on Trump's little lapdog Mitch protecting him and peeing on the Jan 6th commission in their usual, understated way
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
ASUS you kidding me ?
source: theregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Journal News)
 
 
 
Wegman's is recalling their Everything Bagel Seasoned Hummus, which should more appropriately be called Small Hard Black Foreign Material Hummus
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFSB Connecticut)
 
 
 
Dammit Gerry
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 19, 2021
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
Almost 50,000 Floridians losing homeowner's coverage due to widespread roof fraud and many don't even know it yet. No comment from chicken on the roof
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
You loved Band Of Brothers and The Pacific. A third tv series based on the American airforce in Europe during WW2 by the same guys is in production
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Answer: "Fans of this genteel, intellectual trivia game show don't like stuck-up braggarts, even if they're winning its Tournament of Champions"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Scientist)
 
 
 
World's largest iceberg breaks off Antarctic ice shelf. Titanic unavailable for comment
source: newscientist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
"I just got here in this BMW i8 and you want to know why? Cause I ate p***y this morning MFers" Oh, Canada
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"My sister-in-law casually mentioned she was going to terminate the pregnancy that resulted in my 3-year-old nephew but her husband tricked her into missing an appointment. It was a cavalier comment and I'm worried her son will hear. What can I do?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Conservatives: "Those smelly Libs threatened companies into opposing GA voting legislation." Also Conservatives: "Yeah, let's do some economic terrorism"
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin News KXAN)
 
 
 
Austin man honors the time-old rock star tradition of wrecking a really expensive hotel room before moving on to the next city
source: kxan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 18, 2021
(MSN)
 
 
 
Picture of optical illusion found on internet. Difficulty: picture not included in story. Further difficulty: picture not even linked in story
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Music lawsuits, digital tokens, cars, and things people steal from dead French dudes are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 2-8 Googly Eyes Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Music lawsuits, digital tokens, cars, and things people steal from dead French dudes are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, May 2-8 Googly Eyes Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
The UK's NHS saw over a million hospital admissions for obesity before covid hit. Sounds like they're living in a new Stone age
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 Las Vegas)
 
Weeners
 
Las Vegas strip club to offer patrons a little prick
source: fox5vegas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inverse)
 
 
 
The first atomic bomb test created a physics defying "forbidden" crystal. Skeksis unavailable for comment
source: inverse.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Our express elevators are operational. Please pardon the blood and broken bones while we work out a few kinks
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Knewz)
 
 
 
Only Fans sex worker shocked, Shocked SHOCKED to find a former teacher supporting her financially
source: knewz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 17, 2021
(Freethink)
 
 
 
Farming robot kills 100,000 weeds per hour with lasers. Come with me if you want to leaf
source: freethink.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
In business news from 2004, Redbox will go public via SPAC so a whole bunch of new people can lose money investing in old technology
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
In business news from 2004, Redbox will go public via SPAC so a whole bunch of new people can lose money investing in old technology
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Billionaire family and friends who commissioned a luxury yacht to avoid pandemic restrictions and party over the holidays in the Caribbean are now suing for $10 million because they got a little seasick. Producers of FtWD unavailable for comment
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 16, 2021
(CNN)
 
 
 
Space Force commander thrown out of the airlock by Defense Department
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 14, 2021
(CNN)
 
 
 
Office of Special Counsel says HUD Secretary violated Hatch Act. Pretty much every member of Trump administration unavailable for comment
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 10 Mobile)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Road rage. New hotness: Boat rage
source: fox10tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Committee to Protect Journalists)
 
 
 
Israeli air strikes destroy office building housing 13 media outlets, including the Hamas Gazette
source: cpj.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Robert Durst, the guy who confessed to murder in the greatest documentary ending ever, has asked for an indefinite postponement of his murder trial on the grounds that he has untreated bladder cancer and will be stone dead soon enough
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 13, 2021
(National Post)
 
 
 
Trudeau did NOT violate ethics law this time, but will probably apologize anyway
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
With the K in Kmart standing for kaput, the chain announces the closing of another store, leaving only two in NJ. Asked to comment, executives said, "We didn't even know we had any KMart stores left in NJ"
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Toronto's pro lacrosse club relocates to Hamilton, reveals they will continue as the Toronto Rock because Hamilton does not rock. "Around North America a lot of people would look at you and think you're talking about Bermuda or something like that"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Never ask a psychic for a refund
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 12, 2021
(Motor 1)
 
 
 
Ford brings the billboard to your dashboard
source: motor1.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Star Phoenix)
 
 
 
Respectful beaver watcher
source: thestarphoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 11, 2021
(Fark)
 
 
 
The Tuesday Night Science Channel Discussion Thread, 9PM Eastern
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(K2 Radio)
 
 
 
No, no they aren't
source: k2radio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouGov)
 
 
 
Trillions of cicadas are about to rise up from the ground and swarm the eastern U.S. ... and one in four Americans say they'd be willing to eat them. Ewww
source: today.yougov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Cutting worker pay by 2% while raising that of CEOs by 29% is the S&P 500 way
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Italian food, corporate earnings, the Oscars, and other Rich People Things are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, April 25-May 1: The Perils of Ordering From eBay Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Italian food, corporate earnings, the Oscars, and other Rich People Things are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, April 25-May 1: The Perils of Ordering From eBay Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Growing up, my mother channeled her anxiety into housekeeping; everything was in order. However, my house is in constant disarray; my two youngest kids are indifferent, but my oldest is making comments about how messy the house is. What do?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 10, 2021
(Politico)
 
 
 
Russian GRU suspected to be behind directed energy attacks against US personnel
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Refinery29)
 
 
 
SNL skit with Elon Musk accused of cultural appropriation for using common Gen Z language borrowed from African American Vernacular. Eddie Murphy unavailable for comment as last black guy gets off the bus
source: refinery29.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Jim Clyburn tears into miserable failure Mitch McConnell
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pink News UK)
 
 
 
Former gay porn star turned far-right "men's rights activist" bottoms out in Scottish elections. Santorum unavailable for comment
source: pinknews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 09, 2021
(MSN)
 
 
 
Expert at getting banned from social media platforms gets banned from another social media platform
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Elite athlete fails post-race drug test. Lance Armstrong unavailable for comment
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPVI Pocatello)
 
 
 
Because she had easy access to a gun?
source: kpvi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 08, 2021
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Newsmax "TV personality" takes pic with Trump, comes unglued as commenters make remarks about his stupid pants that look like cargo pants/skinny jeans combo; claims he's "a Sharp Dressed Man" who only wears "the most prestigious brand in PANTS"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 07, 2021
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
DraftKings falls after loss quadruples, revenue triples, and nobody had the over-under on this one
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 06, 2021
(Fark)
 
 
 
Anyone here tried Noom? I'm normally pretty healthy but have really back slid over the last year. I'm really lacking motivation and hoping this app can help. Just curious to hear others experiences
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
NHL fines Rangers $250K for comments about the head of Public Safety for Tom Wilson's. That's 50 times the amount Wilson was fined, and that's not just turrible, it's asinine
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
NYAG: Broadband companies illegally lobbied the FCC to tear down the net neutrality rules by faking millions of Americans in public comments and pushing disinformation campaigns
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouGov)
 
 
 
41% of Americans will try to kill their mothers this Sunday
source: today.yougov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Colorado state Representative calls another 'Buckwheat' during session. "That's an endearing term, by the way"
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sanitized Database)
 
 
 
Little Bobby Tables has a new baby brother
source: reportr.world   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 05, 2021
(VinePair)
 
 
 
Counterfeit bourbon is worth a bunch of real money
source: vinepair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
JPMorgan tells employees to GBTW at the office. Only a few dozen people immediately had a problem with this. Fark: because JPM shut down the comments section
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Real estate listings, celebrity endorsements, wacky food and drink ideas, and little known roles of famous actors are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, April 18-24: Silly Hat Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Neck tattoo lady pleads not guilty to driving over graves, attempting to run down mourners at ex's funeral. Claims she was just lost on the way to Florida
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Advertiser reports they were banned from Facebook and Instagram for literally telling the truth about what kind of ads they're running
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 04, 2021
(CBC)
 
 
 
Okay, people, let's review: Reading advice on the internet does not automatically qualify it as a GOOD advice
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Marketing 101: knowing your target audience
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ET Cahada)
 
 
 
Hey ladies, swipe until you get Ben Affleck
source: etcanada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 03, 2021
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
"China, my friend, how politely can I put it? Let me see... O...GET THE F--- OUT"
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
I'm single and just don't generate enough dirty dishes to regularly use the dishwasher. How often should I run it just to keep the seals and everything in good shape?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ultimate Guitar)
 
 
 
Seven rock bands that ended their careers at the correct time. Every band still hanging on by playing the BFE County Fair, take note
source: ultimate-guitar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Scientists say aliens could be using The Sun to communicate, MIB unavailable for comment
source: chron.com   |   share: