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headlines found matching 'Chance'
Wed August 05, 2020
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Why do Republicans have even the smallest chance in November? Because Democrats are, at best, incompetent
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bakenstein)
 
 
 
Would you try bacon grown in a lab from real pork fat cells, produced without animal slaughter? Because now you can
source: zmescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue August 04, 2020
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"Don't kid yourself, Jimmy. If a panda ever got the chance, he'd eat you and every other species you care about"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(House pet)
 
 
 
Here's why you should take a spider out instead of killing it. Go have a few drinks. Probably a nice guy. Maybe even a web designer
source: familyhandyman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon August 03, 2020
(The Score)
 
 
 
Cardinals took their chances and went to a casino. Wheel stopped on COVID-19
source: thescore.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun August 02, 2020
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Day 4 of the NBA bubble, including all the Wizards, Kings and Magic that one would expect from Disney. Beginning at 2 PM ET with Wizards-Nets, followed by POR-BOS, SA-MEM, SAC-ORL, MIL-HOU, capped off at 9 PM with a defense-free Mavs-Suns game
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat August 01, 2020
(Fark)
 
 
 
At your wit's end from social distancing? Need something different in entertainment and distraction? How about a first look at a new science fiction novel? Presenting: The Voyage of the New Beginning, now through Chapter 35 - "Chance"
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 31, 2020
(WWE)
 
 
 
Tonight on Smackdown: Can Uncle Allen hold off the King of the Ropes? Will Bayley's ego write a check that Nikki can cash? Naomi deserves better but still gets stuck facing Lacey & how are Mandy and Otis doing? Find out starting at 8 PM ET on FOX
source: wwe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Presented without comment "Acting ICE chief announces retirement following clashes with Trump officials who had accused Albence of favoring humanitarian concerns about the treatment of immigrants over the chance to take more aggressive action"
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
Sir Alan Parker, director of The Wall, The Commitments and Midnight Express, has died at age 76
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
If you missed the Fyre Festival, the U.S. Marshals are auctioning off all the leftover merch
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(France 24)
 
 
 
Wilford Brimley is watching you masturbate
source: france24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Old and busted: kids writing "How I spent my summer" essays for their teachers. 2020 hotness: teachers writing their own obituaries for the governor
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 30, 2020
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Getting your @ss to Mars is one thing, but stopping when and where you have to is an entirely different kind of flying altogether
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 29, 2020
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
"Hello. Jessica speaking."...... "RRRAARRWHHGWWR"
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 28, 2020
(Bandcamp)
 
 
 
I have no idea what you're talking about so here's 'The Devil Went Down to Georgia' as performed by KoЯn (featuring Yelawolf)
source: kornofficial.bandcamp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Finally, something really big and dangerous that Trump has declared War on. This will definitely help his re-election chances
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
A look at all the new releases coming to Hulu in August
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Facebook takes EU to court over privacy concerns. Yes, you read that right
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 27, 2020
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
Want to hang out with some Olympians this summer? They've got the time now
source: lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Nathan Fillion hopes to have a small Firefly reunion on The Rookie, but chances are it'd be a wash
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Making Star Wars)
 
 
 
Yo dawg I heard you liked prequels so we are giving you a prequel for your prequel. Disney set to begin filming the Cassian Andor Rogue One prequel series
source: makingstarwars.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Germany: "Nein, Hosenscheisser"
source: af.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun July 26, 2020
(Popular Mechanics)
 
 
 
Japan's giant robot takes first step. In other news Japan is building a giant robot because of course they are
source: popularmechanics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat July 25, 2020
(WHDH Boston)
 
 
 
Ever since it was a little dinghy, the boat had wanted to be like the cars it saw going by. Finally, it had its chance
source: whdh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Fifty-four years ago today, Ted Williams was inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. He used his speech to advocate for Negro League greats Josh Gibson and Satchel Paige to be inducted as well
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 24, 2020
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
Red Sox president: We're disappointed Mookie decided to sign with the team we traded him to
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Just like their chances in each election cycle, Arizona Democratic Party headquarters goes up in flames
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
They're not accidental experiments, they're learning experiences
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
The Kalashnikov Channel presents: where to hide behind a car if you're being shot at by one of their AK-47s. Bonus: and RPGs, not that you stand a chance
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
The Donald Trump of Asia: Wash your masks in gasoline to kill Covid
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Cloudy with a chance of mousies
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
♫ Give us any chance we'll take it / Read us any rule we'll break it / We're going to make our dreams come true / Doing it the goon squad way ♪
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Aviation Web)
 
 
 
It's better in the Bahamas. Not that you'll ever get the chance to compare
source: avweb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 23, 2020
(NASCAR)
 
 
 
Harvick draws the pole with Logano along side. Weather is hot with a slight chance of a stray thunderstorm. This is your Super Start Batteries 400 presented by O'Reilly Auto Parts at Kansas Speedway starting at 7:30pm EDT on NBCSN
source: nascar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Coastal Review Online)
 
 
 
The North Carolina Department of Environmental Quality to hold GenX Information Meeting on "forever" chemicals. Apparently Boomers uninterested, Millennials already have the answers
source: coastalreview.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
OK you Farkers, here's your chance to be a part of history. YouTube is accepting content for a new Ridley Scott film, and wants your Life In A Day footage on July 25th. What monumental accomplishments will you submit?
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
If you actually had one of these sex holodecks there's no way you'd waste your time building the rest of the starship (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Cloudy with chance of metaphors
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 22, 2020
(Smithsonian Magazine)
 
 
 
If you've ever wanted to quit your crappy, boring job and become the Artist-in-Residence of a famous gothic cemetery, here's your chance
source: smithsonianmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Man Utd & Chelsea try to bolster their Champions League chances today. Will Man Utd hammer a West Ham team with almost nothing left to play for? Will a thoroughly disinterested Liverpool allow Chelsea to grab an easy 3 points? Kickoff @ 1pm ET
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
New research claims backseat drivers are helpful
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 21, 2020
(SoraNews24)
 
 
 
Ever see a picture that derailed your train of thought?
source: soranews24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 20, 2020
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Can NYPD supporters paint "Blue Lives Matter" near NYC's City Hall? Let's ask Hizzoner
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun July 19, 2020
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Ever watch a seal purr? Ever listen to one activate its laser beam? Now is your chance
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Formula 1)
 
 
 
Mercedes locks out the front row with Hamilton on the pole with Racing Point locking out row two with Stroll launching 3rd. Weather is forecast to be warm with a chance of showers. This is your Formula 1 Hungarian Grand Prix at 9am ET on ESPN
source: formula1.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Hey y'all - we found a food that could protect you from coronavirus. *reads* I'll... uh, take my chances, thanks
source: donga.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat July 18, 2020
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Helen Hunt, Holly Hunter, and Jodie Foster are three different people, which is no surprise to those who have fantasized about two of them
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 17, 2020
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Now that we missed the chance to safely reopen schools, here's the more expensive option
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Prevail)
 
 
 
There's a good chance Ghislaine Maxwell's husband is a former US Coast Guard officer who runs a company that applies big data to shipping lines. Modernization in this field could help efforts to stop smuggling and human trafficking
source: gregolear.substack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
"Think of the Night King and Arya Stark"
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 16, 2020
(Food and Wine)
 
 
 
This Sunday, July 19, is National Ice Cream Day. Here's the scoop on all the freebies and/or deals
source: foodandwine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
UK Court rules that girl who ran away to join ISIS as a young teen should be allowed to return to the UK and have her citizenship restored, because really, is joining ISIS worse than say, becoming a Belieber or a K-pop groupie?
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
In the last event Crazy Cat's Eyes scratched their way to a gold but still couldn't overtake Minty Maniacs and O'Rangers. A chance to hop over the competition in the Hurdles, JMR Marble League 2020--Event #6 sponsored by Last Week Tonight, 3pm ET/Noon PT
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"Ten years from graduating, I'm still not sure university was a good decision. Was university anything more than an expensive blip?" You have three chances to guess the author's major
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Nation)
 
 
 
Obvious: The US Army is using its twitch account to drive recruitment. Tag: By offering kids a chance to win an Xbox
source: thenation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 15, 2020
(Patheos)
 
 
 
Roger Stone: If you are against me, you are a satanic atheist
source: friendlyatheist.patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter Donald Trump)
 
 
 
There is zero chance he wrote this himself
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Auctioneer)
 
 
 
If you've ever wanted to own an original 4 rotor Enigma machine in pristine condition, here's your chance. Hope you got some scratch, it's expected to bring £200k to £300k at auction, which is like $250k to $380k in real money
source: liveauctioneers.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 14, 2020
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
'Hellboy' emerges from the Florida sea a little redder after taking in a 'little' too much sun
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Kanye polling at 2% in presidential poll
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 13, 2020
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Former Watergate prosecutor Nick Akerman knows the differences between the Nixon and Trump impeachments, also why Robet Mueller's investigation never stood a chance because of what "amounted to a cover-up"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
Take mugshots of your pets in case they get lost - with helpful pic of 7-foot tall cat
source: lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
UK bar installs electric fence to force social distancing
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
Owners of shiny new 2020 Corvettes report front trunklid popping up while driving. GM engineers: that's impossible, must be user error
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun July 12, 2020
(Cinemaholic)
 
 
 
Sister Alice claims she can resurrect Charlie Dodson and vindicate Emily, but such a turn is unlikely. Perry has to find out who killed Gannon, though Ennis will try to prevent that. The plots come to a head in Perry Mason, 9PM ET on HBO
source: thecinemaholic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
NBC: "You know what we need? That's right, more cop shows"
source: news.avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Thanks to COVID, the state of South Carolina has a chance to be #1 in something besides tourism and man-on-horse relations
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 10, 2020
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"While the dog can't read street addresses, he can recall the names of customers who have given him treats"
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
And the award for worst take on the Mahomes mega-deal goes to... Zombie Deadspin
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy with a whip and fedora)
 
 
 
Haven't we seen this movie already? Archaeologists getting ready to unearth and open 1200 year old burial mound
source: niku.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Julia Sawalha, an actress in the original Chicken Run, accuses producers of ageism after she was dropped from the sequel with no explanation, assures everyone she's not a racist psycho like Mel Gibson
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Dirt)
 
 
 
House passes broadband bill that is pro-consumer and actually makes sense. So it has zero chance of becoming law
source: techdirt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Professor doubles down on prediction that Trump has a 91% chance of being re-elected. So does that mean he has a 182% chance of being re-elected?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 09, 2020
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
Let's ask 9 republican consultants how they feel about Republican chances in November and boy howdy are the answers doozies
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 08, 2020
(Tom's Hardware)
 
 
 
Taiwanese hardware CEO dies after falling from one of the company's buildings. Platitudes to the left, speculation to the right
source: tomshardware.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Stanford cuts 11 sports programs citing a $70M loss over the next three years despite having $27 billion in endowments
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Chancellor gives diners 50% off on eating out. Your survival percentages may vary
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Stupid: Another reboot. Interesting: Centered around a Black family in Montgomery, AL during the 60's. Total Fark: Fred Savage is involved
source: news.avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Trump has 91% chance to win re-election says guy who picked the winner in 5 of the last 6 elections. And he is going to tie Obama's EC total and have an even bigger inauguration and there is nothing liberals can do about it so there
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
So what are the chances that all the fiscally responsible Republicans who lamented "Blue State Bailouts" related to coronavirus-sparked budget woes will feel the same way now that it's Red States coming to the table with their hands out?
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Researchers: Older people who have problems with their vision and hearing have a 90% increased chance of developing Alzheimer's
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 07, 2020
(Chron)
 
 
 
House that Neil Armstrong lived in the 1960s when he was not in space can be yours for $375K
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SoraNews24)
 
 
 
How to cook heart of shark at home.. actually, don't cook it, just eat it raw. "He'd half-expected the heart to be sliced into strips, like when you buy a cut of fish, but nope, the bag simply contained a complete shark heart"
source: soranews24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Patriots offering free parking for home games, free shirts reading "we're still cool without Tommy" for all fans. Please come
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
After thirty-seven years, Days of Our Lives runs out of hope
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 06, 2020
(WWE)
 
 
 
Tonight on RAW, Asuka & Bayley face of in a "Champion vs Champion" match. A new U.S. title belt to be unveiled, Seth continues his plan to sacrifice Rey (or his son) and who called for a partial 3MB reunion? It all starts at 8 PM ET on USA
source: wwe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Relax, everyone, Kanye West missed the registration deadlines for his presidential bid
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Golf Channel)
 
 
 
If you need a dose of rich, white entitlement, Bryson DeChambeau to the rescue
source: golfchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun July 05, 2020
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Nick Cordero, Broadway actor who battled COVID-19, has died at age 41
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 03, 2020
(Louder Sound)
 
 
 
Geddy Lee has only stood in line once to get tickets to see a band .... Yes, it was not the Eagles
source: loudersound.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 02, 2020
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Lots of people said it couldn't be done, folks. That we had no chance. But we did it. We did it with Trump. WE HIT 50,000 NEW CORONAVIRUS CASES IN A SINGLE DAY. Woooooo-hooooo. USA USA USA USA
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
If you ever wanted to own a giraffe you might soon have a chance as the Oakland Zoo may end up having a going out of business sale
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
No-dwalla Juice
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
The NFL shortens its preseason to just two weeks. Should have happened in 1970 and without a pandemic as cause, but we will take it
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 01, 2020
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Late stage death cult prepares for act three
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 30, 2020
(PC Magazine)
 
 
 
Russians are going to start tossing space tourists at the ISS out the airlock
source: pcmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Did you enjoy that Saharan dust storm this past weekend? Good news: It's happening again
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Johnny Manziel humbled by the NFL, life in general
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 29, 2020
(Laughing Squid)
 
 
 
Tiny lil orphan-babby wombat getting a belly rub is so squee, it made subby's ovaries explode
source: laughingsquid.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live Science)
 
 
 
Newly-discovered spider species looks like it's wearing Joker makeup, named after Joaquin Phoenix. Jared Leto inconsolable
source: livescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
James Carville: "Trump is done. He's yesterday ... There's no chance he's gonna win reelection"
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 28, 2020
(Guardian)
 
 
 
87% of people realise that they don't like going to work
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
FA Cup Quarterfinals kick off with Blades v Gunners, followed by Leicester v Chelsea. Newcastle v Man City wraps up the round, including the semi-final draw at half time. Also, a meaningless bottom half EPL game
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 27, 2020
(Stars and Stripes)
 
 
 
The "Russia paid bounties for dead US soldiers" story hits "Stars and Stripes." Popcorn futures explode like Trump's re-election chances
source: stripes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
"I think there's a chance Trump drops out in August, he fears losing a lot more than he cares about winning"
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
"It's crazy to think how close she was to being put down, and now she's the love of my grandparents' - and our entire family's - life. It's so worth it giving a special-needs cat a chance." Welcome to Caturday
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 26, 2020
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
It's a green light for Red Light District (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Mexico City's Police Chief got a chance to test the bullet-proofing on his SUV as he survives an attack by at least a dozen cartel gunmen who fired "thousands of rounds" from high-powered rifles at him. 2 escort cops and bystander not as lucky
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
If you bought a Model S between 2012 and 2013, there is a good chance you bought a car with known (potentially flammable) defects, but Elon REALLY needed those sales so your safety and well being don't matter as much
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
A thong? There's no thongs in golfing
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 25, 2020
(Some Pissed-off Teachers)
 
 
 
How do you know when you've failed as state Superintendent of Public Instruction? When you can count the teachers who've donated to your re-election campaign on zero hands
source: themontanapost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 24, 2020
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
One more thing Covid-19 can do that most diseases cannot (maybe), and that's pass through the placenta from mother to newborn babies
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PoliceOne)
 
 
 
Organization that does its best to shield bad cops from consequences claims that they have been besmirched and that really it's not their fault
source: policeone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 22, 2020
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
"I can't breathe" shirt lady aka a 62 year old Art Teacher will fight the charges
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Trump expected to suspend visas for tech workers, research scholars, and professors. Finally American experts on the Battle of Versinikia will get their chance in academia
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Zack Snyder's first teaser for his Justice League cut reminds us the film can get worse
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 19, 2020
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Chicago's iO Theater, a chance for young comedians to hone their talent, becomes the latest Covid-19 victim
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Republicans increasingly worried about their November election chances: "The environment really sucks for us right now." You mean the environment that you and your President created over the past three and a half years?
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
In any other election cycle the last several months would have put the final nail in a presidents reelection chances. However this isn't a normal timeline and for half of Americas Trump is doing exactly what they want him to be doing
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 17, 2020
(USA Today)
 
 
 
For 137 JC Penney stores across the US, shoppers will have the chance to legally loot them starting today
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 16, 2020
(Guardian)
 
 
 
A quick and dirty Bundesliga thread? Bayern Munich travels to Werder Bremen with a chance to clinch the title. Freiburg hosts Hertha Berlin, Union Berlin hopes to get points vs relegated Paderborn. Action starts now on FS2 and streaming
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Ben Carson says he's trying to get Trump to back down on his hostility towards kneeling athletes and he's confident "He'll get there eventually"; probably right after Trump's much-anticipated "Pivot to the Center" in the last month of his presidency
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
The handling of Covid has been so bad in Belarus, President Lukashenko may finally be toppled after 26 years. Of course, the first opposition candidate is already in jail and the second just had his company's office raided, but there's a chance
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 14, 2020
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Rage Against the Machine is all the rage in 2020. They were just trying to ruin Donnie's chances by writing an anti-white supremacy song back in 1992. Sneaky bastards
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 13, 2020
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
A sealed letter might show that the Yankees were doing their own illegal sign-stealing during the 2017 season. However the Yankees are arguing the letter "would cause 'significant reputational injury' " to the team if unsealed
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 12, 2020
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby boom going on at Palestinian zoo after humans stop coming around due to coronavirus
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rapid City Journal)
 
 
 
A trifecta of farking stupid; fireworks in a dry pine forest, groundwater contamination, and a crowd of 7,500 people not required to wear masks
source: rapidcityjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Eight years ago, the greatest name ever graced the internet
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
LA police union official: "Every dollar you take away from a department has a real consequence in our neighborhoods." You know, less cops to terrorize citizens, less body armor and assault weapons for cops, less chances for us to seize property, etc
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 11, 2020
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Fired 'Law & Order' writer doesn't want to be dun dun with the show
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 10, 2020
(IGN)
 
 
 
Creator of ABC's "The Goldbergs" has been writing a "Goonies II: Never Say Die" script for nine years and will get a chance to pitch it to Richard Donner
source: ign.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Food and Wine)
 
 
 
8) It's just a yummy loaf of milk
source: foodandwine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Law and Crime)
 
 
 
Tennessee tells judge to get screwed, refuses to allow four million people a chance to vote. If only there were a higher level of government to enforce this
source: lawandcrime.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 08, 2020
(WWE)
 
 
 
Tonight on RAW: Christian host a special edition of "The Peep Show" with Edge, Bayley & Sasha appear after winning the Women's Tag Titles, The Street Profits & Viking Raiders face of in a...decathalon? Find out what else happens at 8 PM ET on USA
source: wwe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPopStarz)
 
 
 
It's official: among the 25 most beautiful women in the world, 11 are South Korean celebrities. Your mom doesn't make the list, though she should
source: kpopstarz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
Man who jumped into abandoned well to escape dog rescued after 6 days. Unfortunately, Sting didn't get chance to write song about it
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun June 07, 2020
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
The Forrest Fenn treasure has been found. My last reason to go camping is gone
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 06, 2020
(Metro)
 
 
 
"When you sign up to foster, you know it's going to be hard when the time comes to say goodbye. With Linda, it was even more difficult because we've gone on such a journey with her, and she is truly a special little cat". Welcome to Caturday
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 05, 2020
(Washington Monthly)
 
 
 
History will not be kind to Republican senators
source: washingtonmonthly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Woman attempts to become a Farker during these coronavirus times, says her boozing has soared during lockdown by drinking during breakfasts, vodka lunches and having nightly cocktails in the garden
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Barron's)
 
 
 
The Colonel hits the gym and has a new, bigger chicken sandwich to take on Popeye, Wendy, and the cows
source: barrons.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
♫ ♬Gave you a job, gave you security Gave you a chance to survive You're just a poor soul in the unemployment line I'm God, You're hardly alive♫ ♬ This is your Trump Lies about Jobs Numbers LIVE thread (starts at 10am EST)
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Delish.com)
 
 
 
It's National Donut Day, so here's a guide to finding the best deals and freebies so you don't have to fritter about looking for them
source: delish.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Carmaker Bentley is idling 1000 positions, smoothly
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 04, 2020
(The Conversation)
 
 
 
New Zealand hits a 95% chance of eliminating the virus, but with a 100% chance of it coming back. Math - not even once
source: theconversation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 03, 2020
(CNN)
 
 
 
"Daddy changed the world" (video)
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
For totally mysterious reasons Tik-Tok's algorithm only suppresses creators of a certain race. Hint: Not the White
source: deseret.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
"If an 8-year-old kid can safely go somewhere to buy a popsicle, and get back home before it melts, chances are it's a neighborhood that works"
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 02, 2020
(The Verge)
 
Weeners
 
First they came for the BBC fans
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 01, 2020
(AP News)
 
 
 
Putin reschedules vote to extend his rule until 2036 and change the Russian Constitution. Meanwhile in the White House, tiny orange fingers begin trembling with excitement as they reach for their box of gold-plated precedental safety crayons
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 31, 2020
(10 News)
 
 
 
Think not living in an HOA protects you from busybody neighbors, think again
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NASCAR)
 
 
 
It's Bristol, baby And finally it looks like the Air Titan might stay parked with a zero chance of rain. The Supermarket Heroes 500 rolls at 3:30 PM ET on FS1
source: nascar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 29, 2020
(Washington Free Beacon)
 
 
 
Noted liberal rag Washington Free Beacon says Trump's re-election chances are not looking good. Mmmmmm...free bacon
source: freebeacon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
"NFL continues to misunderstand the data and analytics" and "The NFL once again had a chance to take a step forward and they chose not to." A think-piece on minority hiring?
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 28, 2020
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
In related news, viewers who successfully complete 64-hour Derek Jeter marathon on MLB Network will receive free gift basket
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lincoln Journal Star)
 
 
 
Here's your chance to finally complete your collection of stars' jock straps
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Fort Myers police sacrifice their precious Krispy Kreme donuts to lure a black bear away from city streets
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 27, 2020
(Slate)
 
 
 
The Supreme Court has a chance to fix its qualified immunity ruling. That's the one that makes it impossible to sue cops for: stealing from you, shooting your kid and your dog, punching nuns, and burning orphanages
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ladders)
 
 
 
Because he knows the time is short / Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the beast
source: theladders.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 26, 2020
(ESPN)
 
 
 
While we wait for actual football to start, ESPN has released its thoroughly vetted odds for every team to reach the Super Bowl. Tell us why they're wrong to the right
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 25, 2020
(WWE)
 
 
 
Tonight on RAW: MVP takes the "VIP Lounge" to Claymore Country. Charlotte vs Nia vs Nattie for the #1 contender to face Asuka and Andrade defends the U.S. title vs Apollo Crews. Plus how will Seth newest follower fare? It all starts at 8 PM ET on USA
source: wwe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Sunbather just has the worst luck
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
NSFW language in a major news outlet talking about the chances for coronavirus vaccines. Finally, time to update the fark filter
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
The coup thwarted, Randy Jackson will rejoin Journey, a reward for fans who refused to stop believin'
source: news.avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 24, 2020
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Harrison, Hardy, Henry and Hudson are extremely rare identical monochorionic quadruplets. Texas always has to do it bigger
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 22, 2020
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Browns are offering up the chance to script the first 15 plays of a preseason game. I mean at this point, you can't really do any worse than the last decade of coaching hires
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical Xpress)
 
 
 
"Don't kid yourself, Jimmy. If a cow ever got the chance, he'd eat you and everyone you care about. Why, right now they're pooping on our lettuce"
source: medicalxpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
I'm just surprised this didn't get aired in the US first
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
If Trump loses the chances are pretty good he will continue shooting his mouth off on Twitter and probably be the nominee in 2024
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 21, 2020
(AP News)
 
 
 
Stabbed through the heart, and you're to blame, you give loons a bad name
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Well, how would you like to coach Tom Brady? "Try throwing a little more off your back foot, and your balls could have more zip if you follow-through with your shoulder"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Just how dumb is Half-scoop? Dumb enough to try to pick a fight with a guy who has hours of radio time to fill every day and is beloved by the same demographic his dad desperately needs to win big in to have any chance at all this November
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MovieWeb)
 
 
 
Tyrion and Khal Drogo are teaming up to kill vampires. Khaleesi seen growing garlic and sharpening crosses
source: movieweb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 20, 2020
(Metro)
 
 
 
You planned on reading your backlog book pile during quarantine but aren't able to. Is there a reason?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Lily)
 
 
 
Dating during quarantine has raised its own set of rules and changed some deal-breakers
source: thelily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Batwoman leaves Batwoman. Still not enough for CW not to renew a series
source: news.avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 19, 2020
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Chris Cuomo has some sage, stern advice for Democrats
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
What season?
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
NFL testing new protective face masks; will undoubtedly claim concussion benefits
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBR)
 
 
 
EA: We are the greediest bastards in gaming today. Xavient: Hold this beer for $6 and you can take one free sip a day
source: cbr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 18, 2020
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Not sure what a Demi Rose is butt [NSFW]
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 16, 2020
(Patheos)
 
 
 
A man who used God as his anti-viral protection learns his lesson
source: patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Could the Mountain come to the NFL?
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Subtropical storm Arthur has 80% chance of forming Round Table of Doom this weekend
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 15, 2020
(Sad and Useless)
 
 
 
Sweary socks for angry middle-aged men. If you're feeling super-rebellious wear them with shorts & sandals
source: sadanduseless.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 14, 2020
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Undrafted player sick of being compared to one of the five greatest NFL receivers of all time
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Delhi TV)
 
 
 
Baby mutant non-ninja turtle found in Virginia
source: ndtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
White Castle is offering tens of thousands of free sliders throughout the day on Friday, May 15th. Air Fresheners are optional
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slash Gear)
 
 
 
United Natural Foods issues a voluntary recall of 'Wild Harvest Organic Fresh Basil' because it contains natural fresh wild organic parasites
source: slashgear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 13, 2020
(Bozeman Daily Chronicle)
 
 
 
One day after tourist falls into scalding thermal pool during illegal visit, Yellowstone Park decides to open 'er all up and let Darwin sort things out
source: bozemandailychronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Another thing that's opening early? Hurricane Season
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inside the Magic)
 
 
 
Muppet Guys Talking reunites for a free livestream event supporting the fine healthcare workers at Veterinarian's Hospital
source: insidethemagic.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 12, 2020
(Politico)
 
 
 
Joe Biden: "I reject the premise' that' remote campaigning is hurting my White House bid. Adding: Have you SEEN me? The less America is exposed to me the better my chances. Besides at this point I just have to be NotTrump and I win it in a laugher
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
The top 10 sci-fi aliens to be abducted by. #1 might give you the chance to jam with Wyld Stallyns
source: io9.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Conor McGregor wants to fight again, this time with UFC interim lightweight champion Justin Gaethje
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 11, 2020
(WWE)
 
 
 
Tonight on RAW: The Man comes around for MiTB winner, the Empress of Tomorrow. Edge still has business with a Viper & The Street Profits need some version of "the smoke" they are better at than the Viking Raiders. It all starts at 8 PM ET on USA
source: wwe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
"This is Houston, and there are crazy drivers, and I never would have expected to see them going through a cemetery. Especially when everyone was there to pay their respects during a patriotic flyover"
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 10, 2020
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Trump says he couldn't have exposed WWII vets to COVID-19 because "the wind was blowing the wrong way"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 09, 2020
(Do You Remember)
 
 
 
As bad as 2020's been so far, at least we still have Dick Van Dyke with all his marbles
source: doyouremember.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 08, 2020
(KCRA 3 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Frontier Airlines to take temperature of passengers before boarding because if you choose to fly Frontier, there must be something wrong with you
source: kcra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Somebody is giving away a haunted house because people are too afraid to live in it. Second prize is a plastic baggie full of goldfish
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Relaxing at home while cooking meth with the kids? It's not Florida Man, its Breaking Bad Monopoly
source: news.avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
AOC in AC is A-OK by me
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 07, 2020
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
BMW stopping European Delivery program, where you fly to Bavaria to pick up your car and rev it up on the Autobahn, due to lack of interest. BMW never bothered starting a South Carolina delivery program, also due to lack of interest
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Who would have thought there's be so much overlap between people missing the point of Tiger King and people ignoring social distancing? Everyone? Oh, carry on then
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 06, 2020
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
"Be a most excellent part of our movie" *air guitar lick*
source: news.avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Madonna, Robert de Niro, and a lot of other wacky folks want to end 'unbridled consumerism' and believe it is unthinkable to 'go back to normal'. Saying all this while 'quarantined' in their mansions and hopping around the world on their private jets
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Andy Dalton really rubs it in Cam Newton's face
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Spy)
 
 
 
Ant-Man director addresses yet another Marvel continuity error
source: digitalspy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 05, 2020
(NFL)
 
 
 
I'm sure it hurts a little
source: nfl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Back off? In his moment of triumph? I think you overestimate your chances, Mr. Barr
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Facebook)
 
 
 
And because you need it, elephants
source: facebook.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 04, 2020
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Ferrari is now worth more than Ford or GM. You mean Subby missed out on his chance to trade his Suburban straight-up for an 812?
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWE)
 
 
 
Tonight on RAW: Drew faces off vs Murphy (Who's not your Buddy, pal), The Street Profits face The Viking Raiders for the prestigious Red Solo Cup trophy & a Last Chance Gauntlet match to replace Apollo Crew at MiTB. It all starts at 8 PM ET on USA
source: wwe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Fans of porn star Honey Gold you still have a chance with her, she says she'd 'definitely' sleep with you (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Not News: senior citizen asks questions about hotel reservations website; NEWSFLASH: Justice Thomas, during teleconferenced oral arguments
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun May 03, 2020
(CNN)
 
 
 
Democrats are now slight favorites for gaining control of the Senate, worry not though they'll find a way to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 02, 2020
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Another COVID-19 casualty: Automatic Labs' cloud connected car tracking device service. Fark: despite it being a division of SiriusXM, which is still doing just fine
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sports Illustrated)
 
 
 
Kansas City goes out and gets a Taco
source: si.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 01, 2020
(Collider)
 
 
 
Jurassic World 3 offers chance for fans to be eaten by a dinosaur for charity. Subby would do it for free just to be done with 2020
source: collider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 New York)
 
 
 
"I died from coronavirus...but I got better"
source: fox5ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Food and Wine)
 
 
 
Assuming you've already deep into your own "appetizers," Taco Bell jumps into the home meal kit business
source: foodandwine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(India Today)
 
 
 
"Oprah? Uma. Uma? Oprah." "Penguin, Orangutan"
source: indiatoday.in   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 30, 2020
(WANE Ft. Wayne)
 
 
 
Do you miss overpaying for ballpark food? Now you can eat like you are at the ballpark for a week for only $185
source: wane.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Weather forecast: Partly cloudy skies with 100% chance of good boi
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
There's fark you money and then there's turning down $100M for a two hour appearance fark you money
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 29, 2020
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Obvious tag explodes as columnist asks if Republican's indulgence of Trump's idiocy is bottomless
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denbighshire Free Press)
 
 
 
Lambtuplets, people. And just as hideous as you'd expect
source: denbighshirefreepress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Thinking about adopting a dog while sheltering at home? Here are some tips that owners can use to help train their new best friend. Welcome to this week's Woofday Wetnose Wednesday thread
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 28, 2020
(9 News)
 
 
 
Freeze Peach causes State Emergency
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Florida finally releases number of COVID-19 cases at each nursing home and ALF. In related news, Trump to blast WHO later today for helping Melmac spread virus
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Ed Sheeran is using those stolen souls for good
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 27, 2020
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Scientists say this year to be among the hottest ever recorded. Pff, they say that every year
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Indian Express)
 
 
 
Hello, this is dog. Weather today: scattered tummy rubs and 50% chance of treats-ooh, here nice lap **crash**
source: indianexpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio is giving ANOTHER nepotistic job to his wife? That's it. I'm never voting for him to be mayor again. Narrator: He's term limited
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Former Clinton Press Secretary offers +1 Insightful advice on handling Trump briefing room rallys to White House press corps
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
But Lysol
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Summit Daily)
 
 
 
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach this boy to fish and he'll feed the family for a month
source: summitdaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun April 26, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
This is a rental. It's Fran from Bethel
source: 92moose.fm   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 24, 2020
(National Post)
 
 
 
Rock, Paper, Scissors, Judge
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"Today's forecast has a high chance of pussy"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
SN(almost)L is back this weekend
source: news.avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 23, 2020
(Internet Archive)
 
 
 
The Community Chest wasn't just a Monopoly trope after all. While this would be derided as Socialist Propaganda today, it reminds us that there was once a time when people cared about their neighbors. Ah well, what's the worst that could happen?
source: archive.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 22, 2020
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Top Obama adviser on all the talk about Michelle Obama being Biden's veep pick: "How about no, does no work for you?"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Things have really gone downhill for John Cleese from the old Monty Python days of insulting the French, he's now charging fans £249 for insulting video messages after getting 'no work offers' (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Another fatality of the Covid-19 pandemic: cable companies
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 21, 2020
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
UK, Saturday: "What PPE shortage? Why, we've got an enormous shipment coming in from Turkey, been in the works for ages, be here any day now." UK, Sunday: "Uh, hi Turkey, so, erm, any chance you might want to sell us some PPE?"
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Hey, it's an ask-a-mod thread
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
NYC to honor coronavirus heroes with a ticker-tape parade once the lockdowns are lifted. Trump can sleep in that morning
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Great Falls Tribune)
 
 
 
♫ How we doing? Less COVID today? ♫ Not a chance, doc, Nay, nay, nay ♫ We've flattened curve but the cure it still shuns ♫ Nothing is working...SEND IN THE NUNS ♫
source: greatfallstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
The fact that Donnie even has a chance in November is incredibly disturbing, says anyone who's not a mentally ill Trump cult member. Oh, and somehow these farks think that half-assing the coronavirus testing will result in victory
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Spy)
 
 
 
Supergirl's fifth season will give Lex Luthor a do-over
source: digitalspy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Tom Brady decides to cheat on quarantines, too
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 20, 2020
(Las Vegas Review Journal)
 
 
 
Don Hutson makes some sense here too, but the Packers opt for Steve Largent, who has a chance to become a go-to weapon for Aaron Rodgers
source: reviewjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Typical. Now even IKEA's meatballs are self-assembly
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun April 19, 2020
(The Register)
 
 
 
We heard you wanted to run COBOL... ON YOUR BROWSER *throws card stack everywhere*
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Like your ex drunk-calling at 3 AM, for-profit colleges pinky-swear they've totally changed, please just give them a second chance
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tin Soldier)
 
 
 
This week at Tin Soldier, Milo draws a vampire with a juice box. It's a free web serial by a farker with a chance for a month's FARK subscription - DIT
source: tinsoldier.space   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 17, 2020
(ESPN)
 
 
 
NASCAR's token African American would like everybody to give NASCAR's casual racist another chance
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
Willie Nelson to host livestreamed variety show dubbed "Come and Toke It" April 20th. "Perhaps the world's only chance to knock smoking with Willie Nelson off their bucket list"
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
"What are the chances that one of the most profound intellectuals and nimble polymaths in the United States - nay, the world - just so happens to be married to the daughter of the President of the United States?"
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 16, 2020
(Screen Rant)
 
 
 
Yeah, that's not a phallic reference at all
source: screenrant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndieWire)
 
 
 
The world missed its chance to see Wolverine's butthole
source: indiewire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
I don't want to alarm you or anything, but it kind of looks like Hugh Hewitt might have written something that wasn't based on unfettered stupidity
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Wanna star in Martin Scorsese's new film?
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Stop feeling bad for yourself; coronavirus may have hurt Dak Prescott's leverage against the Cowboys and chances of being a $100 million quarterback
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 15, 2020
(Public Radio Tulsa)
 
 
 
Rents have been waived for a second month in a row by the housing authority in the Soviet Socialist Republic of *adjusts glasses* Tulsa, Oklahoma
source: publicradiotulsa.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
What band or act do you most regret not going to see live? Must have had the opportunity to, just chose not to or put it off until it was too late
source: blog.retroplanet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 14, 2020
(Guardian)
 
 
 
The UK tried and failed three times to partake in the chance to buy bulk PPEs with the EU
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 13, 2020
(Central Maine)
 
 
 
This is the plot to most summer camp movies. All we need now is Camp Tigerclaw, boobies, and Old Man Johnson
source: centralmaine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Times of India)
 
 
 
Look to the skies, especially April 14-16 for a major celestial event
source: indiatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Amazon Fresh and Amazon Prime Now's next available slot for delivery for new customers is some indefinite time between now and August, maybe
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
So let me get this straight, we're under a global pandemic, the economy is tanking, Krakatoa Volcano has erupted again AND there's a fragmented comet heading towards Earth?
source: truththeory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Bored stuck at home? Crayola is asking for help in naming all 16.7 million colors represented in the 24-bit color space
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Come take a virtual tour of the Dark Crystal display at the Atlanta Center for Puppetry Arts, but beware the Skeksis
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun April 12, 2020
(Tin Soldier)
 
 
 
Farker DoBeDoBeLurk's web serial is 3 years old. 1500+ pages of free reading and a chance at a free FARK subscription, do you even care what it's about? DIT
source: tinsoldier.space   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Dear Employers, please do not record if you have any employees sick with COVID-19, we wouldn't want to hurt my chances for re-election
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 10, 2020
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Behold a new bright comet in the heavens. It foretells great possibilities of, oh wait never mind, it's gone
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some non-Magat)
 
 
 
Why are Trump voters so poorly informed? They get their news from articles like this
source: maga20.softfay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 09, 2020
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Let's check in on the first state to legalize recreational marijuana and see how they're handling the quarantine
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Some people see a national pandemic as a time to stay safe. Others see a chance to blitz across an empty continent and set a new Cannonball record
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
I too was an 11th-century hurdy-gurdy player, until I took an arrow to the knee and missed my chance to perform with Led Zeppelin
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LAD Bible)
 
 
 
Dolphins thrilled to have a sloth friend visit them. She flips upside-down to look at him, since he's upside-down on his branch. D'awww-tastic
source: ladbible.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(American Military News)
 
 
 
4th carrier hit with coronavirus. Time to watch Midway
source: americanmilitarynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 08, 2020
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
WI GOP Monday: Absentee ballots that aren't returned in time can't count. WI GOP today: Except those from Republican-leaning areas, of course
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Tori Spelling's husband secretly wishes haters would actually drag her. Physically. Like, away
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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