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Fark NotNewsletter: Last night's shiatshow of a dumpster fire
Posted by DisseminationMonkey at 2020-09-30 1:02:03 PM, edited 2020-09-30 1:03:02 PM (98 comments) | Permalink
More: FarkBlog

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1646 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Sep 2020 at 8:30 PM (2 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



________________________

A message from Drew Curtis:  
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Hey everyone, hope your week has been well.

I'm not sure who got the worse end of the stick last night, those of us who watched the debate or those of us who didn't and woke up to the aftermath.  We'll cover some of the lowlights on the Fark Livestream today at 3 p.m. Eastern.

A quick heads up - we've been planning on breaking out a new STEM tab to differentiate the geek tab, however in the process of pre-populating it I've discovered that what remains in the geek tab is pretty much Fandom.  So there's a good chance we may retire Geek and create two new tabs.  Suggestions, comments, thoughts? Drop me a line (drew at fark dot com).

Just a short note for today - things have been moving fast in the news cycle for what seems like an eternity, and now it feels like they've sped up even more.  It's going to be a hell of an October.
________________________

We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.
________________________ 


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
LordOfThePings showed us what Balancing Rock looked like before it fell over
Joe USer figured out why another Farker dislikes Bill Murray so much
Redh8t shared a less confusing video with a high Farker
Mantour knew how we could be honor the memory of Longcat
UltimaCS suggested a more economic alternative to a new $500 connected spin bike
SBinRR pointed out that a model who's having trouble finding work because of her unibrow has other options
Devolving_Spud reacted to the claim that male bottlenose dolphins pleasure themselves with live eels
Schroedinger's Glory Hole was quick to come up with a headline when the submitter gave up
We Ate the Necco Wafers knew the truth about Farkers' feelings toward chipmunks
jsnbase got the worst possible results on a marital rating scale from 1939
Smirky the Wonder Chimp explained why EMTs claimed a "dead" woman's chest would continue moving for an hour after death

Smart:
Cubansaltyballs decided that terrorizing a certain well-known group of villains is just too much work
arrogantbastich had a suggestion for what to do if you're up against someone who has a "taser shield"
whither_apophis predicted how an insurance company might handle an accident at a winery
Endive Wombat gave examples of how easy it can be to become addicted to painkillers
Iggie shared something many families worry about in the U.S. now
NateAsbestos figured it might be a good thing that Microsoft purchased Bethesda's parent company
scottydoesntknow possibly proved that God from the Bible is real
hubiestubert predicted trouble if churches start to also serve as bank branches in some areas
Tr0mBoNe helped bust someone for illegally dumping garbage

CSB Sunday Morning: That one time at a funeral
Smart:
proco reminded a funeral director that it's best to avoid taking shortcuts when it comes to certain traditions
Funny: TheWriteGirl's friend had a memorable interaction with Grandma

CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread for Farkers to share true stories from their own lives based on a weekly topic. If you have a topic idea for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please contact Farkback ahead of time, or just submit it on Saturday afternoon/evening. Please note: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning threads have a high likelihood of being greenlit, there is no guarantee they will be.

TotalFark Discussion:
Note: This section can only be accessed by TotalFarkers  
Smart: Hankie Fest told us about an innocent man paying the price for someone else's stupid and selfish decision
Smart: NM Volunteer gave advice on what to do when a client you meet on site refuses to wear a mask and gets up in your face
Smart: hobnail shared a story about a hero from FedEx
Smart: Shostie described the right way to fark around
Smart: CommieTaoist told another TotalFarker what to make first with a new 3D printer
Funny: Literally Addicted contemplated a future with more sexy times than the past
Funny: brap discussed flooring options

Politics Funny:
This Is Bold Text wasn't too sure about the headline for Ron Paul's medical emergency
GooberMcFly was touched by the reaction when Ruth Bader Ginsburg's personal trainer honored her by doing pushups
Farking Clown Shoes explained why Donald Trump claimed "the United States will be the first nation to land an astronaut on Nars"
NateAsbestos revealed the real reason Trump had to suddenly leave a press conference
gilgigamesh had quite a reaction watching Trump get booed while paying respects to Justice Ginsburg

Politics Smart:
koder wondered if people would excuse what Kyle Rittenhouse did if someone else had done it
Jack Sabbath remembered another president who was booed at a memorial service
Magorn shared an opinion on how Joe Biden should handle the debates against Donald Trump
FlashHarry gave advice to Democrats who are worried that their vote won't be counted
foo monkey wondered how priorities got so screwed up


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down

Photoshops:
kabloink dressed up some french fries
RedZoneTuba got a little confused about how to play horseshoes
Circusdog320 created a greeting card to remind people to vote
kabloink had a space kegger
You might not want to hire Yammering_Splat_Vector as a housekeeper or babysitter
#2 showed us a lesson that's about to be learned
FirstDennis gave this kid some rock 'n' roll dreams
Yammering_Splat_Vector's greeting card is a threat or a warning
Yammering_Splat_Vector found a divine model for this dress
Resident Muslim showed an exhilarating race through the forest

Fartist Friday: Captain 2020
gunther_bumpass gave us the hero we need and deserve. Be sure to check out the other great entries, too. 

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: This weekend will include National Poetry Day, Taco Day AND Vodak Day. Write a poem celebrating Vodak and/or Tacos, and illustrate it using any medium - pen and paper, Photoshop, sculpture, MSPaint, etc.  

FarktographyIf I Toad You Once I've Toad You a Thousand Times
All Latest won with a snail sitting slimily on a succulent scarlet strawberry

Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact Elsinore.


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

A tough time on the Quiz last week for most, although I did figure out that I was in possession of a spaghetti squash. It made for a great take on succotash with okra and diced tomatoes. However, the 1000 club remains closed this week, so more leftovers for me! On the Quiz itself, Gravitationally Challenged came out on top with 914, followed by WoolyManwich in second with 910 and tiezane in third with 898. FrancoFile took fourth with 852, and runwiz finishes out the top five with 830.

The hardest question on last week's Hard Quiz was over Google's Doodle on September 15 to kick off Hispanic Heritage Month. Only 28% of quiztakers knew the story of Felicitas Mendez, who sued her local school district in the 1940's as they insisted her two sons could not attend the same school as her daughter because their skin was too dark. While the ruling in the case of Mendez v. Westminster in 1947 did not actually result in full desegregation of California schools, its impact was certainly felt much later - the case was briefed in amicus by the NAACP's attorney Thurgood Marshall, and implemented by the-California governor Earl Warren, both of whom were involved in a lesser-known case about a decade later called Brown v Board of Education.

The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was over which Tom Cruise movie cadets at the Navy's Fighter Weapons School were prohibited from quoting. 86% of quiztakers knew the school's more familiar name is "Top Gun." I'm pretty sure they're also prohibited from riding a motorcycle on the runway, but nowadays seminude beach volleyball games are fine if you're into it.

The hardest question on the Easy Quiz was about Taco Bell Canada's new potent potable. Only 43% of quiztakers knew that our neighbors to the North could fight off the moose and swing their Zambonis by Taco Bell on the way home from the hockey match to snag a bottle of Jalapeño Noir wine to pair with their Toasted Cheesy Chalupa. If they want a Mountain Dewgarita, they'll have to make a run for the *actual* border and hit up an American Red Lobster.

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was over Presidential souvenirs. 82% of quiztakers knew that a 2" lock of hair belonging to Abraham Lincoln was sold at auction the previous week for a whopping $81,000, along with a bloodstained telegram that conclusively disproved the theory that telegram services were shut down immediately following his assassination. Also, a lock of hair from William McKinley sold at auction in 2008 for a mere $956. So, yeah, ending slavery makes your body parts worth a lot more to the descendants of your relatives.

If you missed last week's Quiz, you can catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz here. Congratulations to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this week.
· · ·

98 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2020-09-30 1:05:54 PM  
was it though? the result seems good.
 
2020-09-30 1:09:37 PM  
Hey y'all,

It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish. If everyone can kind of scale that back, it would be great. Nobody's in any trouble and it's been funny, but we're starting to cross that line.

Thanks!

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-30 1:10:59 PM  
Two tabs..........Dweeb and Nerd.
 
2020-09-30 1:13:52 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

Is it too early for pancakes?
 
2020-09-30 1:14:39 PM  
Yo, shiat's on fire meme.

That's a good one.
 
2020-09-30 1:15:17 PM  

Jake Havechek: [Fark user image 425x565]
Is it too early for pancakes?


Playboy bunny? How come she's not wearing one of those pancakes?
 
2020-09-30 1:17:16 PM  

brantgoose: Jake Havechek: [Fark user image 425x565]
Is it too early for pancakes?

Playboy bunny? How come she's not wearing one of those pancakes?


wAIT........oLIVIA wILDE IS A PLAYBOY bunny?
 
2020-09-30 1:17:27 PM  

brantgoose: Jake Havechek: [Fark user image 425x565]
Is it too early for pancakes?

Playboy bunny? How come she's not wearing one of those pancakes?


they are both pancakes behind that stack.
 
2020-09-30 1:17:45 PM  

DisseminationMonkey: Hey y'all,

It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish. If everyone can kind of scale that back, it would be great. Nobody's in any trouble and it's been funny, but we're starting to cross that line.

Thanks!

[Fark user image 850x446]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-30 1:17:59 PM  

Jake Havechek: [Fark user image 425x565]
Is it too early for pancakes?


Is this a welcome to Fark meme.  Cause I'm behind this meme.
 
2020-09-30 1:18:24 PM  
Fun fact. Dr. Seuss invented the word "nerd".


Another fun fact. He pronounced his name to rhyme with Roll Royce. Zoyce. And Freud pronounced it "Frood".

He had a grandchild or great grandchild who did a column in Punch magainze entitled Freud on Food.

So the family still uses the correct Austrian pronunciation nad hasn't caved to public opinion.

Avoid the Noid.
 
2020-09-30 1:18:40 PM  
Went back and did the quiz and did a lot better than usual, though even with the newsletter giveaway I didn't make the 1k club - I guess you have to get every question right to leap that hurdle?
 
2020-09-30 1:19:56 PM  
What's that white thing on the pancakes? Did they tape the butter down? I just noticed.
 
2020-09-30 1:21:19 PM  
Damn it, I really want some pancakes now.
 
2020-09-30 1:22:46 PM  

ChrisDe: DisseminationMonkey: Hey y'all,

It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish. If everyone can kind of scale that back, it would be great. Nobody's in any trouble and it's been funny, but we're starting to cross that line.

Thanks!

[Fark user image 850x446]

[Fark user image 375x250]


i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2020-09-30 1:23:39 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-30 1:24:14 PM  

brantgoose: What's that white thing on the pancakes? Did they tape the butter down? I just noticed.


Reflection from the overhead light.
 
2020-09-30 1:24:27 PM  

ChrisDe: DisseminationMonkey: Hey y'all,

It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish. If everyone can kind of scale that back, it would be great. Nobody's in any trouble and it's been funny, but we're starting to cross that line.

Thanks!

[Fark user image 850x446]

[Fark user image 375x250]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-30 1:25:39 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


No old people were harmed during the making of this GIF.
 
2020-09-30 1:26:01 PM  

Enigmamf: Went back and did the quiz and did a lot better than usual, though even with the newsletter giveaway I didn't make the 1k club - I guess you have to get every question right to leap that hurdle?


There are 11 questions on the Hard Quiz. Theoretically, you can score 1100 if you answer every question correctly in 1 second. Your score counts down from 100 each second from the time the question appears.

So yeah, in order to break 1000, you have to get all questions correct, but if you answer too slowly, you might not crack 1000 with a perfect 11/11.
 
2020-09-30 1:26:59 PM  
It was like we forgot everything about how he "debated" four years ago.
 
2020-09-30 1:27:14 PM  

DisseminationMonkey: It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish


Have you had the chance to visit some of the Main page threads recently? There is perceptible anger, hate, and divisiveness that permeates almost all of the exchanges. Seems like the trend toward more violent "Welcome to Fark" images fits pretty closely to the reality in Fark as this year has gone on.
 
2020-09-30 1:28:01 PM  
Or two tabs-

Glorious PC Master Race

Dirty Console Peasants
 
2020-09-30 1:28:14 PM  
I only caught the last 15 minutes of the debate, but wow.  Tiny Dick Daughterfarker was just flailing about, incoherent and unhinged and constant interrupting the moderator and Biden.  I did expect such a pathetic performance.  But I did notice that Fark kept on timing out and putting out 502 errors.
 
2020-09-30 1:29:03 PM  

Oreminer: DisseminationMonkey: It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish

Have you had the chance to visit some of the Main page threads recently? There is perceptible anger, hate, and divisiveness that permeates almost all of the exchanges. Seems like the trend toward more violent "Welcome to Fark" images fits pretty closely to the reality in Fark as this year has gone on.


I blame Fark for not letting the trolls be trolls.
 
2020-09-30 1:30:24 PM  

DisseminationMonkey: It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish. If everyone can kind of scale that back, it would be great. Nobody's in any trouble and it's been funny, but we're starting to cross that line.


Guessing you're one of those losers who attempts to enforce an even standard of conduct in an attempt to facilitate constructive discussion on a digital media platform.
 
2020-09-30 1:31:58 PM  

Mike_LowELL: DisseminationMonkey: It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish. If everyone can kind of scale that back, it would be great. Nobody's in any trouble and it's been funny, but we're starting to cross that line.

Guessing you're one of those losers who attempts to enforce an even standard of conduct in an attempt to facilitate constructive discussion on a digital media platform.


Without Nazis there would be no Call of Duty!
 
2020-09-30 1:31:59 PM  

Moroning: Or two tabs-

Glorious PC Master Race

Dirty Console Peasants


Seconding a PC Tab.  We need a containment board for the poors.
 
2020-09-30 1:34:24 PM  

Moroning: Without Nazis there would be no Call of Duty!


I hope you believe me when I say I've always had the idea for a movie or a television show in which a team of individuals goes back in time to kill Hitler to prevent World War II, so that Call of Duty never gets made.

It is in this moment that I realize great minds truly do think alike.
 
2020-09-30 1:35:07 PM  
Pretending an issue doesn't exist doesn't solve the issue, just sayin.
 
2020-09-30 1:35:22 PM  
Drew can we turn off the filter for the debate related threads?  The word "shiatshow" is now CNN approved after all.
 
2020-09-30 1:39:06 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


There may have been a casualty during this GIF.
 
2020-09-30 1:40:03 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-30 1:41:26 PM  
Where is the 3D printed dildo?
 
2020-09-30 1:42:27 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-30 1:42:39 PM  

Oreminer: DisseminationMonkey: It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish

Have you had the chance to visit some of the Main page threads recently? There is perceptible anger, hate, and divisiveness that permeates almost all of the exchanges. Seems like the trend toward more violent "Welcome to Fark" images fits pretty closely to the reality in Fark as this year has gone on.


We're all stressed to our limits, for sure. It's not a Fark thing, it's a reality thing. I don't really know what to say about it, but I think at least we can keep some things from becoming too angry, like Welcome to Fark images, d'awww threads, and maybe pancakes.
 
2020-09-30 1:43:16 PM  

Moroning: Oreminer: DisseminationMonkey: It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish

Have you had the chance to visit some of the Main page threads recently? There is perceptible anger, hate, and divisiveness that permeates almost all of the exchanges. Seems like the trend toward more violent "Welcome to Fark" images fits pretty closely to the reality in Fark as this year has gone on.

I blame Fark for not letting the trolls be trolls.


We don't use that word here, we use the term "mods" instead.
 
2020-09-30 1:45:05 PM  

Rev.K: Where is the 3D printed dildo?


Now that's a loaded question.
 
2020-09-30 1:45:13 PM  

Rev.K: Where is the 3D printed dildo?


I think he got a time out.
 
2020-09-30 1:45:59 PM  
No violence?  How about the sorrowful aftermath of violence?
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-30 1:47:52 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-30 1:51:41 PM  

Diocletian's Last Cabbage: No violence?  How about the sorrowful aftermath of violence?
[Fark user image 400x381] [View Full Size image _x_]


THAT PUP IS INNOCENT!!!
 
2020-09-30 1:55:24 PM  

DisseminationMonkey: Hey y'all,

It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish. If everyone can kind of scale that back, it would be great. Nobody's in any trouble and it's been funny, but we're starting to cross that line.

Thanks!

[Fark user image image 850x446]


Why do I have to be any better than the President?
 
2020-09-30 2:00:22 PM  

SirMadness: DisseminationMonkey: Hey y'all,

It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish. If everyone can kind of scale that back, it would be great. Nobody's in any trouble and it's been funny, but we're starting to cross that line.

Thanks!

[Fark user image image 850x446]

Why do I have to be any better than the President?


I'm pretty sure if the President posted on Fark with the same behavior and decorum as we know him to exhibit, he wouldn't last very long on Fark.
 
2020-09-30 2:00:23 PM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2020-09-30 2:05:55 PM  

Rev.K: Where is the 3D printed dildo?


They're still leveling the bed
 
2020-09-30 2:12:46 PM  
Yeah, that's what Fark needs. A further Balkanization of tabs. Then we can go from an average of 12 comments per thread in those tabs to 6.
 
2020-09-30 2:17:36 PM  

Danger Avoid Death: Yeah, that's what Fark needs. A further Balkanization of tabs. Then we can go from an average of 12 comments per thread in those tabs to 6.


Begun, these Tab wars have.
 
2020-09-30 2:17:54 PM  

DisseminationMonkey: Hey y'all,

It's been noticed that some of the "Welcome to Fark" GIFs have been getting progressively more violent and injury-ish. If everyone can kind of scale that back, it would be great. Nobody's in any trouble and it's been funny, but we're starting to cross that line.

Thanks!

[Fark user image 850x446]


im5.ezgif.comView Full Size
 
2020-09-30 2:20:49 PM  

Danger Avoid Death: Yeah, that's what Fark needs. A further Balkanization of tabs. Then we can go from an average of 12 comments per thread in those tabs to 6.


I suggested we combined the D'awww and Politics tabs to keep everyone's blood pressure down while they're yelling at each other, but nobody listens to my suggestions.
 
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