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George Lucas' second career as a wedding photographer, a pane in Dakota Johnson's ass, and Lebron James considers owning another NBA team besides the Golden State Warriors: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 8/14 - 8/20
Posted by Unfreakable at 2016-08-22 10:53:08 AM (5 comments) | Permalink

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1402 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Aug 2016 at 10:57 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Happy Monday, folks. Got a few headlines here that you might like if you missed any of them last week.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2016-08-14 to Sat 2016-08-20:  Confucius say... Man with unchecked parachute will jump to conclusion  A perfectly logical explanation about why you wake up in the middle of the night and can't go back to sleep that fails to take into consideration the ghoul-faced shadow beast perched menacingly on your dresser staring at you in the dark  Sailor tries to get off like a Clinton  FiveThirtyEight finally gets away from discussing Trump's flailing poll numbers to answer an unrelated question: How big is a fart? Okay, mostly unrelated  Autoerotica  Senior citizens in Fark's favorite state face skyrocketing rates of STD transmission. Two in the pink, one in the wrink  Apparently, George Lucas has entered into his second career as professional wedding photographer  Texas girl gets prosthetic arm from library. It's due back in two weeks, but can be renewed twice  'Drug resistant super lice' have invaded forty-eight states. Of course, they're not really all that super, but that's just nit-picking  The truth about aliens is coming soon ...and President Obama will deliver the message for the Lizard People. SOON  Burglars break into iconic Brady home; police say current resident scared them off. Probably with a machete, if he hadn't had a Snickers lately

Sports:  Athlete goes to the Olympics as an Australian, comes back as an American  LeBron James says his dream is to someday own an NBA team. Although back in June he pretty much showed everyone that he owns the Golden State Warriors  Olympic race walker not disqualified, despite sporadic runs during event

Geek:  NASA says that Venus could have once been habitable, just like Cleveland  Scientists may soon be able to heal the blind. Jesus Christ  We choose to go to the Muon, not because it is easy, but because it's 7.5 sigma huuugge

Entertainment:  Apparently, Dakota Johnson has a pane in her ass  John McLaughlin misses first show in 33 years. "WRONG. It was 34 years. And he will be back. Next subject"  Couple planning Game of Thrones-themed wedding, apparently has never seen a Game of Thrones wedding scene

Politics:  Putin to receive first classified briefing on Wednesday  The hosts of Fox and Friends apparently believe that wearing glasses, as Hillary now does, is "a sign of brain damage." Though, in their defense, they have had to interact with Rick Perry a lot, so you can see how they'd think that  Thirty minutes after Paul Manafort's resignation, his chief deputy, Rick Gates, has resigned from the Trump campaign. Captain Morgan Bateson unavailable for comment

Business:  U.S. Olympic medalists to pay taxes on the intrinsic value of their medals, which is $564 for gold and $305 for silver. There is no value for the bronze, which is exactly the same when it comes to negotiating for commercial endorsements  Cisco is changing the way we work, live, play and layoff  McDonalds removes child fitness trackers from Happy Meals as it turns out that children who eat at McDonald's are allergic to fitness
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5 Comments     (+0 »)
2016-08-22 11:38:06 AM  
Yay, I made it back after a bit of a drought.

Andrew W K's "Party Hard" playing through my head.
2016-08-22 11:50:22 AM  
Hey, Unfreakable

/you missed an "l" in your headline
//Yes, I am a pedant, why do you ask?
2016-08-22 11:51:04 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Hey, Unfreakable

/you missed an "l" in your headline
//Yes, I am a pedant, why do you ask?


/it's my eyes
2016-08-22 12:17:40 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Hey, Unfreakable

/you missed an "l" in your headline
//Yes, I am a pedant, why do you ask?


/it's my eyes

Eh, it's okay. I have a thing I refer to as "admin blindness" where if I read too many headlines, my mind actually fills in typos and I don't always see them in the queue. It's not outside the realm of possibility that I'd typo something, that's for sure.
2016-08-22 12:48:42 PM  
Captain Bateson approves!  ;)
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