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Tiger constructing a getaway car, drinking coffee through a ballgag, and lewd dudes feud nude: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 7/31 - 8/6
Posted by Unfreakable at 2016-08-08 7:40:46 AM, edited 2016-08-08 7:42:14 AM (1 comment) | Permalink

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1075 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Aug 2016 at 7:45 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Good morning, everybody. Got a few good headlines from last week for you, in case you missed any.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2016-07-31 to Sat 2016-08-06:  It's like rain on your wedding day  World's most expensive cheese comes from donkeys, probably tastes like ass  Woman steals $6.7m of printer ink. Must have smuggled it out in her fountain pen DOZENS of times  Tiger angrily removes bumper from car, comes back for radiator, but car already gone. Apparently tiger is constructing a getaway car  Free art classes expanded for seniors with dementia and Alzheimer's. Now, you can have confusing crayon scribbles on your fridge from both your kids AND your parents  US Air Force claims F-35 is 'combat ready,' at least assuming enemy pilots will be willing to land next to it so the pilot can get out and punch them  Crystal Lake c-c-c-c-closed due to high levels of E.-E.-E.-E. co-co-co-co li-li-li-li  Turkey issues arrest warrant for cleric. Paladin and half elf dual-classed ranger also wanted for questioning  Memorial services planned for teens killed in Roswell. I want to bereave  Lewd dudes feud nude, brew rude moods, prude food and crude tubes  BDSM coffee shop opens in Portland. Not sure how you drink coffee through a ballgag, though

Sports:  Canadian women's soccer team scores the fastest goal in Olympic history, 20 seconds into the game, beating the old record of 2 hours and 45 minutes  "American Teen Shooter" wins first Olympic gold. Phrasing is everything  Dick Move

Geek:  Much like the Atlanta Falcons, center of the galaxy has no young stars  White House hosts the first ever drone workshop. Not to be confused with the weekly presidential press briefing  Sean Bean will be voice of Civ VI tech tree, stalling all progress in the classical era when he dies on turn 24

Entertainment:  Calista Flockhart is returning for the second season of Supergirl, but only in a guest starring capacity until she's written off the show after being defeated by a slight breeze  NIN releasing new song in September. It will start quietly, then Trent will scream, rock out hard for 30 seconds, then have solo piano, then more screaming/rocking, then end with solo piano  D'Angelo's former manager found d'ead

Politics:  Trump kicks baby out of rally, presumably jealous of the baby's much larger hands  Former U.S. Congressman Steve LaTourette dies of cancer. Fark. Shiat  If elected president, Trump says that Ivanka will have a position on his staff

Business:  Comcast is being sued by the Washington state attorney general for selling "near-worthless" service plans to customers. The Obvious tag will be here between 1-5 PM today  Colleges say hosting a presidential debate is worth the $5 million expense. Especially those schools that like to see the competition, aggression and full contact violence but can't afford to field a football team  Kirin lifts profit forecast 33%. Well, isn't that just lawful good?
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1 Comment     (+0 »)
2016-08-08 09:09:52 AM  
There were some funny headlines this week. +1
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