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Nine-year-old boy Frank Lee Morris' Alcatraz record, Gilbert Gottfried still orbiting the Sun, and yet another white hipster moves to Detroit: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 6/12 - 6/18
Posted by Unfreakable at 2016-06-20 11:25:18 AM (0 comments) | Permalink

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1727 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Jun 2016 at 11:30 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Good morning, everybody. Got some fresh headlines for you this week

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2016-06-12 to Sat 2016-06-18:  Police idenitify L.A. Pride weapons suspect as Lord of the Rings star Elijah Wood  Teens save man in sinking car by hurling bricks and breaking car windows. When interviewed, teens said, "What? There was a guy in the there?"  Another white hipster moves to Detroit and for some reason it's news  Perfume company releases a line of Star Wars themed fragrances. And I thought they smelled bad on the outside  Nine-year-old boy swims to Alcatraz and back, breaking the previous 1962 record by Frank Lee Morris  National sex survey finds that Catholic girls have the most orgasms  Van goes up in a blaze of irony  Japanese city offering public funds to freeze women's eggs. Those vending machines keep getting weirder  Truck carrying deli meat collides with truck hauling bread  Texas man arrested in serial rock-throwing case, because only parallel rock-throwing cases are licensed in Texas  Nyquil -- the nighttime sniffling sneezing aching coughing violate your probation so you can rest in jail medicine

Sports:  Peng-Win  Manti Te'o trying to fill leader role vacated by Eric Weddle. Quick check to make sure Eric Weddle is a real NFL player..... okay, good  Russia develops shot that protects track and field athletes from contracting Zika virus at 2016 Brazil Olympics

Geek:  Activision is producing a video game show on Netflix. The second season will be the same as the first season, the third season will only be available as paid DLC. And three different studios will take turns filming it  Russian robot escapes lab, commences hunting Jimmy Carter  Scientists discover "quasi-satellite" that's orbiting both the Earth and the Sun. No one knows where it came from or how it got there, but it's going to stick around for centuries. Kind of like Gilbert Gottfried

Entertainment:  Suprising absolutely no one, Hamilton wins Best Musical. In other news, a new block of Hamilton tickets just went on s... and they're gone  You know you're old when you can actually remember when Meg Ryan looked like Meg Ryan  Gibbs arrested, Abby to do DNA test

Politics:  George Will tries to push Mitch Daniels as the Trump alternative for Republicans despite the fact that Purdue hasn't won a bowl game since 2011  Debbie Wasserm... Wasser... Wasserma... Wasn't gonna work here much longer anyway  Chelsea Clinton gives birth to the presumptive Democratic nominee for 2052

Business:  Sapho raises $9.5M in venture capital, showing that you can get rich making LGBT erotic poetry  Johnson Publishing announces sale of Jet, Ebony magazines, presumably to Peter, Michael and Samir from Initech  Visa is upset that its indentured serfs are being treated like pawns by Walmart who sees them as economic vassals
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