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Republicans reach around to embrace the gay community, the worst blind-dating matchup of all time, and an opportunity to buy an artisanal, hand-crafted, eco-friendly, cruelty free bridge: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 4/3 - 4/9
Posted by Unfreakable at 2016-04-11 12:06:42 PM (4 comments) | Permalink

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1392 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Apr 2016 at 12:31 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Happy Monday, everybody. Hope your week is starting off right. Lots of great headlines this week.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2016-04-03 to Sat 2016-04-09:  Woman has 720 condoms confiscated by Indonesian customs for being pornographic material, also for being wildly optimistic  Lesbos to be visited by Pope Francis in what has to be the worst blind-dating matchup of all time  Study finds millennials are more vulnerable to scams than any other age group, including seniors. In other news, anyone want to buy an artisanal, hand-crafted, eco-friendly, cruelty free bridge? You guys should like it, it's even in Brooklyn  Let me play for you the song of my poophole  Man who had a stroke running in a marathon says he's got half a mind to run in another one  Brave Iraqi Army, bravely ran away / When ISIS reared its ugly head, they bravely turned their tails and fled / Brave Iraqis turned about, and gallantly they chickened out  Italian bee rustling is on the rise. Interpol on lookout for anyone carrying millions of tiny lassos  New sign for Civil War veterans buried in Billings cemetery. Personally I think displaying the sign would have been a better choice  A 4-year-old saved his mom's life by unlocking her cellphone and calling for help, is now planning to put Kindergarten on hold while he considers offers made by both Apple and the FBI  "I'm scared on top of this utility pole. I'm going to puma pants"  B-52's join the fight against ISIS, bringing a New Wave in the allied offense

Sports:  St. Louis Cardinals strike out 14 times against Pirates pitchers on Opening Day. City of Pittsburgh immediately renamed The Windy City  Much like the LGBT community, the National Championship is not allowed in North Carolina  Royals slam three dongs and finish with a Wang. The last time TV was this filthy, it was nothing but Bush and Gore

Geek:  Scientists create artificial skin with hair follicles and sweat glands, are now just waiting for the T-800 endoskeleton from Cyberdyne Systems  Expert warns that way too many kids are running around with asthma inhalers these days. Okay, maybe more 'stumbling and gasping' but still  Researchers confirm that sleepy teens engage in risk-taking activities. Parents of teens confirm that wide-awake teens do the same thing because, duh, they're teenagers

Entertainment:  It's a wrap insulin  Rick rolls again

Politics:  Ivanka Trump-branded scarves recalled because they could burst into flames. Her father's pants are next  Indiana Republicans reach around to embrace their gay community  Socialist Jew to speak at Vatican. HE HAS RISEN

Business:  IKEA recalls LATTJO batcape because it SKRATSCHES, CHOHKSYA  Mattel's Fisher Price names new creative director. The position was recommended for adults age 45-52  Don't you hate it when you get a piece of music stuck in your head? Hyundai feels your pain, since they can't stop recalling Sonatas
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4 Comments     (+0 »)
2016-04-11 01:39:44 PM  
F u$t p0st
2016-04-11 01:41:59 PM  
...all that work to get around the filter and I forgot the R.

/commits fark seppuku.
2016-04-11 01:57:54 PM  
Recalling Sonatas was brilliant.
2016-04-11 02:11:52 PM  

Trivia Jockey: Recalling Sonatas was brilliant.

and that
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