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Chip Monk, the search for Seattle's hipster ninja masturbator, and Obama nominates Self for court pick: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 3/13 - 3/19
Posted by Unfreakable at 2016-03-21 6:56:46 AM (3 comments) | Permalink
More: FarkBlog, Mini Kanye West, Mini Kim Kardashian, Kim Kardashian, The Walking Dead, Federal Bureau of Investigation, Cleveland Browns, hipster ninja masturbator, Kanye West
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1148 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Mar 2016 at 7:03 AM (3 years ago) | | share: more»
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Happy Monday, everybody. Hope some of these give you a chuckle like they did for me.
Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2016-03-13 to Sat 2016-03-19:
Russian military begins withdrawal from the parts of Syria that Putin doesn't want
Police seek hipster ninja masturbator in Seattle. Ironically, someone saw him coming
Woman's addiction causes her to eat her armchair foam. She hopes eventually to recover
Explosion at Hawaii energy research laboratory leaves researcher seriously injured, anxiously awaiting new super powers
Twitter turns ten years old. And just like a ten year old child it communicates with fractured sentences, demands constant attention from everyone around, and is years away from ever actually making any money
Computer nerds successfully get into a woman's panties
Man ordered to undergo mental health evaluation jumps from court house's third floor balcony. Evaluation complete
Apple CEO says the company's fight with the FBI is "about the future." Which is hard to believe since the FBI's technical skills are somewhere between the Victrola and the rotary phone
Your trailer park door you should latch it, when a violent itch he would scratch it. He has a short fuse and threatens abuse by putting to use his new hatchet
Dak arrested for DUI, which may after his draft prospects, force him to join the Rebellion, and die in battle as a snowspeeder gunner. Drinking kills
Goodell to give up discipline duties. No word on whether knocking your wife out in an elevator will still be an equal suspension to wearing the wrong color socks
Now that they've washed their hands of Johnny Manziel, the Cleveland Browns vow to find a quarterback who's mature, durable, and a team leader. And .... hey, what's Robert Griffin III doing here?
Instagram to display photos order, out of will test feed algorithm-based
Fossilized T-Rex found in Montana determined to be pregnant female, prompting emergency State Legislature sessions across the US to ban abortions in the 16,250,000th trimester
Could Apple's iWatch detect a stroke? Well, it probably depends on if it was on the dominant wrist
Camille Cosby does not want to discuss her marital sex life. Most likely because she can't remember any of it
Emerson, Smith and Wesson
Chachi loves phony
Trump supporters deface cemetery at latest rally. To be fair, the dead in Illinois were going to vote straight-ticket Democrat anyway
Rubiobot blue screens
Obama nominates Self for court pick
Apple claims the DOJ actions would appall the Founders. And who would know better than a company owned by white males that uses slave labor?
Microsoft in trouble for hiring more women
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