Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
A 100% complete specimen of Homo erectus, a little on the creepy side, a little on the patricide, and superb bowel commercials: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 2/7 - 2/13
Posted by Unfreakable at 2016-02-15 12:24:41 PM (6 comments) | Permalink

•       •       •

2207 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Feb 2016 at 12:28 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Happy President's Day, everybody.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2016-02-07 to Sat 2016-02-13:

img.fark.net  Operation "Methed Up" ends with 46 arrests, no complete sets of teeth

img.fark.net  ಯೇಸು ಕ್ರಿಸ್ತನ, ಇದು ಒಂದು ಚಿರತೆ. ಪೂಲ್ನಲ್ಲಿ ಪಡೆಯಿರಿ

img.fark.net  Chicken Little finally vindicated

img.fark.net  Stray bullet finds its forever home

img.fark.net  Man arrested for exposing himself to women in a mall parking lot, claims he misunderstood the sign for Dick's

img.fark.net  13-year old fatally shot after cousin falls off hoverboard, discharging felon brother's illegal firearm. This one needs a trailer, a drone, an alligator and a pitbull to complete the Florida Bingo card

img.fark.net  Horses can recognize human emotion. There will be no living with bronies now

img.fark.net  Relic of Abe Vigoda will be enshrined in Denver

img.fark.net  Hai skool seenyers upset they're righting scors ar low on ACT evin if they kan pay $50 to git rescord

img.fark.net  Answering the door covered in blood was a little on the creepy side, but no matter how you slice it, police also think it was a little on the patricide

img.fark.net  Scalia dies on Texas hunting trip. Dick Cheney's current whereabouts unknown


Sports:

img.fark.net  Cam Newton quickly walks out of his post-game press conference. Bystanders say they hadn't seen him move that fast all night unless he was avoiding diving for a fumble

img.fark.net  Dion Phaneuf: It sucks being captain of such a losing team, things can't get much worse. Leafs Management: You've been traded to the Senators

img.fark.net  Alfa Romeo may return to Formula 1 to show the world what a car falling apart at 200mph looks like


Geek:

img.fark.net  American Museum of Natural History now has a 100% complete specimen of Homo erectus

img.fark.net  Federal safety regulators rule that the navigation system of a self-driving car can be considered the car's driver. Still no word on if insurance companies will deny potential accident claims as acts of deus ex machina

img.fark.net  White House proposes $19 billion NASA budget. Most money earmarked towards rocket launches, inevitable investigations as to What Went Wrong


Entertainment:

img.fark.net  Now that the game is over we can declare a winner from this year's crop of commercials, many of which which wanted you to have a superb bowel

img.fark.net  Wolverine's healing factor beats cancer for the fifth time

img.fark.net  Actor Tommy Kelly dead at age 90, according to his brother Johnny Kelly, law-abiding nightclub owner


Politics:

img.fark.net  RubioBot's speechifying subroutines continue to malfunction, indicating a complete system wipe may be necessary

img.fark.net  Obama asks Congress for a new icebreaker. You'd think 'Hey, baby, I'm the President of the USA' would be good enough

img.fark.net  Carly Fiorina aborts run for President


Business:

img.fark.net  Time accidentally adds MySpace to its top eight

img.fark.net  SoundCloud experiences a total loss of volume

img.fark.net  International Torch, Ltd., Amalgamated Pitchforks, Inc., Delaware Panic Sirens, and of course US Wig Superstore
· · ·

6 Comments     (+0 »)
 
 
2016-02-15 12:48:57 PM  
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.comView Full Size

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2016-02-15 01:33:19 PM  

Non Sequitur Man: [s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com image 354x302]
[img.fark.net image 336x186]


That's some funny shiat, right there.
 
2016-02-15 02:24:27 PM  

Brakebills Alumni Office: Non Sequitur Man: [s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com image 354x302]
[img.fark.net image 336x186]

That's some funny shiat, right there.


I attempted to anagram your name to see if it would shed some light on your main account:

"Able bears lick muffin oil"
"Fulfill Eskimo Caribbean"

No help at all.
 
2016-02-15 02:36:43 PM  

Non Sequitur Man: Brakebills Alumni Office: Non Sequitur Man: [s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com image 354x302]
[img.fark.net image 336x186]

That's some funny shiat, right there.

I attempted to anagram your name to see if it would shed some light on your main account:

"Able bears lick muffin oil"
"Fulfill Eskimo Caribbean"

No help at all.


He helps alumni of the first community college in Brakebills, NY. No, not Brakebills College For Communities.
 
2016-02-15 03:03:24 PM  

Non Sequitur Man: "Able bears lick muffin oil"


That will be my new troll alt.
 
2016-02-15 03:11:31 PM  

Brakebills Alumni Office: Non Sequitur Man: "Able bears lick muffin oil"

That will be my new troll alt.


Glad I could help?

/hahahahaha
//where are my meds?
///bet I left them in the Alumni Office...
////forbidden fourth slashie!
 
Displayed 6 of 6 comments


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking





On Twitter




In Other Media
Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report