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Wichita Massacre Brothers may have a branding problem, apes smoking on Mars, and a lovely day for a barber queue: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 1/17 - 1/23
Posted by Unfreakable at 2016-01-25 11:49:25 AM (1 comment) | Permalink

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1073 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Jan 2016 at 11:50 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Happy Monday, everybody! Enjoy the headlines.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2016-01-17 to Sat 2016-01-23:  The Oregon LARPers have taken up road construction to fill the time between playing cowboys and soldiers on their hijacked Indian burial ground. This puts them one leatherman away from a Village People concert  Boston mobster Enrico Ponzo who posed as an Idaho rancher is now set to go on trial. Apparently, authorities became suspicious after learning there was an Idaho rancher named Enrico Ponzo  If you're blue and you don't know where to go to why don't you go where yarmulkes fit: Putin on kibitz  WHOOP...there it is  By an 8-1 vote, the U.S. Supreme Court re-instated the death sentence, formerly thrown out by the KS Supreme Court, for the "Wichita Massacre brothers," who in retrospect, probably should have called themselves something else in their appeal  Madrid hairdressers have homeless line up for free haircuts. It's a lovely day for a barber queue  Asphalt truck overturns, inadvertently repairing a Michigan road  American Marine imprisoned by Iran receives death sentence as local authorities prepare to fill him full of lead  Policeman in Florida responds to complaint involving unarmed black teenagers, starts shooting within seconds after arriving  366 Chinese cities do not have safe air quality. Which answers the question: "How many cities are in China?"  Are we not doing "phrasing" anymore?

Sports:  Since 2000, Cincinnati taxpayers have spent $920 million to support Paul Brown Stadium. Although to be fair, most wasn't for the actual building, but rather to cover the cost of Bengals team bail bonds  Dick move might get gymnast to the Olympics  NFL plans U.K. franchise in 6 years. Which is pretty ambitious considering it took them more than 20 years just to get another team into Los Angeles

Geek:  Wikipedia turns 15 years old. Although at various times it was listed on Wikipedia as being either 20 or 25 years old and had reportedly died earlier in the week  NASA's Curiosity Rover finds a gorilla and a camel on Mars. Those apes will smoke almost anywhere  Scientists learning how to record your dreams and play them back for you. Say that they'll give you the Running Away From Evil Creature dreams for free, but it's $9.99 for the one where you're having sex dreams about your wife's sister

Entertainment:  Michael Caine says at 83, he doesn't get offered many movie roles. But he said it softly at first and then he started talking VERY VERY LOUDLY  ♫ I can't remember if I cried ♪ As I made my family cower and hide ♪ The cops, they took me for a ride ♪ The day the music died ♫  Jamie Foxx auditions for lead in biopic of Cory Booker

Politics:  Giant rift opens between GOP factions, resulting in the reappearance of Tasha Yar and a militant Starfleet at war with the Klingons because the Enterprise-C didn't sacrifice herself at Narendra III  Politician turned reality TV star endorses reality TV star turned politician  ♪ This land is your land, this land is my land / unless you tried to rent from Trump's old man ♪

Business:  United CEO recovering after a heart transplant. Passengers shocked that a United Airlines executive actually has a heart  Apple reports a slight rise in women and non-white U.S. employees after hiring one woman, one black and one Hispanic worker  Nike headquarters will add 3.2 million square feet, making their shoes completely unwearable
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1 Comment     (+0 »)
2016-01-25 01:37:20 PM  
Barber queue was my favorite of this group.  Well played.
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