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Scientists identify the "Donald Trump Phenomenon" in monkeys, Margate police mistaken for Bedrock law enforcement, and supporters can no longer "Feel the Chafe": a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 10/18 - 10/24
Posted by Unfreakable at 2015-10-26 10:45:02 AM (2 comments) | Permalink
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1575 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Oct 2015 at 11:10 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Happy Monday, everybody! Enjoy the headlines.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2015-10-18 to Sat 2015-10-24:  Flintstone. Look for Flintstone. He's now wanted for street robbery. Near the town of Margate, where police are facing mockery  Good guy with a gun takes down a dangerous armed individual at a movie theater  Some people are saying you can name a brand-new butterfly species by winning a bid on eBay. Others think it's an urban moth  Further proof we live in a culture of violins  "Family: Bambi the dog races back into burning home for man, 69." To clarify, that's an age  A Wichita woman passed out on a ferris wheel when she realized the door was hanging open. Authorities say she's slowly coming round  Scientists say women struggling to conceive should do yoga. Pregnant you will be  $ ( * )( * ) $ (.) (.) $ (@)(@) $ ( • )( • ) $ (©) (©)  Chinese President Xi Jinping has been for a friendly pint in a pub with British leader David Cameron. Presumably at the Pigs Head Cock Inn  There is unrest in the forest / There is trouble with the trees / For the maples want more sunlight / And the oaks ignore their SCREAMS  Seabiscuit breaks another record

Sports:  LeBron James could sit out the entire preseason because of a pain injection in his back. Apparently his back is still sore since the playoffs from teammates giving him the Heimlich maneuver  ESPN to cut 350 jobs, reduce Sportscenter to 23.5 hours per day  The Miami Hurricanes have officially been downgraded to a Tropical Depression

Geek:  Scientists discover bees love caffeine and will do a special "waggle dance" to lead other bees to it. I guess it gives them a nice (•_•) / ( •_•)⌐■-■ / (⌐■_■) buzz. YEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH  Scientists find that the louder the monkey's calls, the smaller the monkey's balls. They have named this the "Donald Trump Phenomenon"  SETI SETI, who can I turn to? 8462852

Entertainment:  Sesame Street introducing an autistic character. Wait, then what's Elmo?  Hank Baskett fumbles his reconciliation with Kendra Wilkinson  CeeLo Green wants to come back to "The Voice," surprised to hear so many folks respond with a familiar two-word answer

Politics:  Fake Texan from Connecticut attacks fake Texan from Canada  Most obstructionist president ever? President Obama's veto of the Republican-supported defense authorization brings his veto count to five, the highest number ever recorded by an African-American president  Lincoln Chafee drops out of race after realizing that his "Feel the Chafe" slogan wasn't resonating with voters

Business:  Steel says Tata to Scoonthorpe  IBM changes to IOU  Star Wars ticket resellers ask $10,000 for opening night premiere, since it's not likely any Star Wars fan will need more than one ticket
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2 Comments     (+0 »)
2015-10-26 01:33:02 PM  
Still no credit to Patton Oswalt on the "Feel the Chafe" joke?
2015-10-26 05:35:17 PM  
I'm just pleased to finally be able to read the boobies thread, the one that appeared on the main page for a while, just to tell you it was for total Farkers only. Which is fair enough I guess, but at the time, even the link was for total fark only, so I wasn't even able to see that.
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