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Jared Fogle pleads guilty to getting into smaller pants, Jesus paves, and we'll always have Paris: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 8/16 - 8/22
Posted by Unfreakable at 2015-08-24 8:55:01 AM (1 comment) | Permalink
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1472 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Aug 2015 at 8:55 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Damn, the submitters were ON this week. Incredible job.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2015-08-16 to Sat 2015-08-22:  To thwart illegal migrants, Budapest turns to thousands of cannibalistic police who insist they're ready to take on the soylent majority  Jared Fogle pleads guilty to getting into smaller pants  Hilton to stop offering pornographic films. We'll always have Paris  Motel 6: We'll leave the pilot light on for ya  Brooklyn man who tried to avoid ticket by stealing traffic cop's penis charged with larceny, gets ticket anyway  Josh Duggar had a paid Ashley Madison account. How touching  Jared Fogle loses another 100 pounds  A judge in South Africa has postponed Oscar Pistorius's early release from prison. Looks like he won't be shooting through that door any time soon  British family on vacation gets the best photobomb ever  Home birth just as safe as going to the hospital and cheaper too. Well, maybe not when the carpet cleaning is factored in, but still  Jesus paves

Sports:  Fox Sports suspends Donovan McNabb "indefinitely" after he rear-ended a car at a stoplight while driving intoxicated. Former colleagues expressed astonishment that McNabb did not somehow manage to stop the car 3-4 yards short of the collision  Seven MLB players with a shot to break Barry Bonds' HR record. Wasn't that how Bonds got the record?  John McEnroe tells Jimmy Kimmel that he could beat Serena Williams. YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS

Geek:  Verily, vomit as virus vector varies by viscosity, velocity  Scientists create wormhole in the lab. EVERYBODY PA  Spotify wants to know about your contacts and where you're going and be friends with you on facebook and WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT OTHER MUSIC APP WHO IS SHE IS SHE PRETTIER THAN ME???

Entertainment:  A concert by the band Great White, at a farm that was the scene of a fatal hayride incident last year, was cancelled due to a power outage. Which was probably a lucky break for the audience, all things considered  FIREFLY to return to Fox lineup next season  The "Buffalo Bill" house from Silence of the Lambs is for sale. Would you buy it? I'd buy it. I'd buy it so hard

Politics:  Jenna Bush Hager honors the accomplishments of her family by naming her daughter after Afghanistan's largest crop  Carly Fiorina visits the Iowa State Fair; 4,000 fair workers laid off  Former inspector inspects suspect inspection specification, suspects deception in support of rejection of nuclear inspection injection

Business:  Vietnam devalues its Dong. Begins test driving Corvettes  White people everywhere planning midnight release parties for September as Toyota announces it will roll out remodelled Prius  Company says their new chewable coffee Go Cubes have the same taste as drinking regular coffee, now hopes to take the chewable coffee market away from Starbucks
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1 Comment     (+0 »)
2015-08-24 09:38:40 AM  
I think "FIREFLY to return to Fox lineup next season" was the best one. XD
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