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Actor lucky he was only stabbed with a four-loaf cleaver, smart pants for your dumb ass, and four injured by a fawlty rollercoaster at Alton Towers: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 5/31 - 6/6
Posted by Unfreakable at 2015-06-08 12:18:25 PM (11 comments) | Permalink
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1237 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Jun 2015 at 12:23 PM (3 years ago) | | share: more»
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Happy Monday, enjoy the headlines everybody...
Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2015-05-31 to Sat 2015-06-06:
Say what you will, but Hillary would have back pedaled
Pig terrorizes town and craps in squad car, expected to be suspended two weeks with pay
Carrion luggage found at Tokyo train station
Four injured by fawlty rollercoaster at Alton Towers
Park rangers to bear: "Eat Shih Tzu and die"
Woman charged with running over seven people with her car. Hopes to pickup the split on acquittal
"Amateur porn is a case of class struggle." You're only off by two letters
Actor accidentally stabbed in the stomach with a bread knife during theater performance finishes scene, says he was lucky it was a four loaf cleaver
Pope appoints the first "auditor general", a lay man answerable only to the pope himself who is free to go anywhere and everywhere in the Vatican to review finances, management practices, etc. Apparently the title "Inquisitor" had too much baggage
(o\_/o) c= = = mlm (;_;) mlm
Man with no penis manages to keep it a secret from his girlfriend for an entire year. Apparently it never came up
Yankees embarrass the king. This is not a repeat from 1783
The Broncos are the next team with deflation issues
BREAKING: Kyrie Irving's kneecap
Google and Levi's team up to create smart pants, ideal for covering up your dumb ass
Contrary to what Disney always told us, science finds goofy orbits around Pluto
The force apprehends stormtrooper outside elementary school with "realistic looking" laser gun. There was no real threat as stormtroopers never hit anything, anyway
Shaaaaa mmmm onnnnn nnnnnnn... Shaaaaa mmmmmm onnnnn nnnnnn iiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiit
Bruce Jenner will now be Caitlyn Jenner, with a C instead of a K. Kris's eyebrow would twitch if it weren't frozen with Botox
A few parts of Angelina Jolie turn 40 today. Happy birthday, lungs, liver and spleen
North Carolina close to passing anti-abortion legislation, but will have to wait 72 hours before they decide whether it's a good idea or not
Government of Brownbackistan collapses. Local warlords assume control of key infrastructure
Rand Paul: Not 100% a Libertarian robot, but #1 with Libertarian robots. *sparks* DESTROY DESTROY
After learning about the fire at the Apple plant in Texas last week, North Carolina's Apple data center hopes to avoid patent litigation by going with a chlorine leak instead
T-Mobile in talks to merge with Dish Network, meaning your calls will get dropped when it rains and your TV will be impossible to hear in a building
J.P. Morgan eliminates voice mail for its employees. Or as it's now referred to by the goverment, "evidence"
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