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Mama June added to no-fly list, dwarf twins for Christmas, and a victory for the Association of Lesbian Lumberjack Grunge Fans: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 11/23 - 11/29
Posted by Unfreakable at 2014-12-01 8:17:08 AM (5 comments) | Permalink
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2862 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Dec 2014 at 1:18 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

With the end of November now behind us, it's time for the Headline of the Year contest to kick off. Start looking for preliminary voting threads to start showing up on TFD as early as today.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2014-11-23 to Sat 2014-11-29:  It's official: Local St. Louis judge has fitted Officer Darren Wilson with a ball and chain  University of Maine fans fail to beat record for most flannel worn at an event, hope to overtake the Association of Lesbian Lumberjack Grunge Fans next time  Google searches may predict what you're getting for Christmas. I can't wait to unwrap my lesbian dwarf twins  Ferguson grand jury documents released in effort to appease the three people who will actually read them instead of finding something to burn  Guess who got banned because of their dubious sexuality and for walking around half naked? Ok, besides your Uncle Tommy  Man arrested for aiming banana at police. The officers were able to bring the incident to a peaceful conclusion since they had thankfully been taught self defense against fresh fruit, and could have even handled a man armed with loganberries  The number of people going blind in America continues to rise, no end in sight  An employee stealing $6400 worth of bratwurst and kielbasa? Police say they never sausage a thing  Mama June put on no-fly list  There once was a poet from New York / Who by many was considered a dork / But now Mark Strand / Will be returned to the land / As in him you can now stick a fork  Sometimes, a Christmas Tree picks you  

Sports:  Johnny Manziel involved in 20 person brawl, says it's not fair to hit a man when he's sitting on the bench  Realizing that they already have their eight wins, Dallas decides to take the rest of the season off  Ray Rice beats Roger Goodell  

Geek:  NASA scientists believe "extreme shrimp" might hold clues to alien life. Hey, so long as they're getting ideas from District 9 and not Event Horizon, subby calls it a win  New experimental bus runs on waste and poop. U.S. Congress now labeled as renewable energy source  NASA promotes Black Hole Friday, giving Soundgarden an idea for a comeback single  

Entertainment:  John Lennon's guitar expected to go for nearly a million dollars at auction. George Harrison's guitar not expected to fetch as much due to water damage from it weeping all the time  Alec Baldwin's stalker back in action in spite of jail time, apparently refuses to change her behavior or set her sights any higher than Alec Baldwin  Actor George Eads announces he's leaving CSI after discovering he's still on CSI  

Politics:  Obama says Hillary Clinton could give America "That new car smell." In other news, Hillary Clinton is apparently 68% cheap vinyl  Obama grounds Chuck  Hillary now gets paid more than Bill for speaking gigs, but he still gets way more groupies; meanwhile, Biden's concert rider demands a case of Jack, a clean skull bong and a mudshark  

Business:  Romulus acquires sixteen IHOP restaurants. Apparently, the Tal Shiar enjoys pancakes  ♫ ♫ And I said, "What about missed estimates at Tiffany's?" And she said, "I think the shares have dipped, and as I recall we both found an investment unwise" ♫ ♫  Failing for-profit college will cut out the middleman and be run by a debt collector
· · ·

5 Comments     (+0 »)
2014-12-01 01:56:53 PM  
W00t!  Back on the list after a long dry spell!
2014-12-01 02:56:13 PM  
Mods - when you get around to posting the HOTY contest, keep in mind that FARK no longer has tabs for each subject. Instead of the word "tab", try using "category" or "page" for Business, Sports, Entertainment, Geek, and possibly "clusterfark" for politics. That way it'll make more sense to newbies who wouldn't have seen the previous non-mobile site design.

/minor preemptive nitpicking
//you'll get over it
2014-12-01 04:04:27 PM  
Link for lesbian lumberjack assn fark discussion plz.
2014-12-01 04:51:12 PM  

doyner: W00t!  Back on the list after a long dry spell!

I hadn't gotten one for nearly two years, and now I've gotten three in the last few months. Maybe my deal with the devil finally got enforced...
2014-12-01 05:30:42 PM  

Serious Black: doyner: W00t!  Back on the list after a long dry spell!

I hadn't gotten one for nearly two years, and now I've gotten three in the last few months. Maybe my deal with the devil finally got enforced...

My last was in February, but I stumbled on two this week.  It's a fun game.  Now, to make the playoffs...but not feeling too bullish about it.  There's some fierce competition this year.
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