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Fight at golf club leaves hole in one, Jelena Jankovic almost loses her set, and US air passengers reclassified as cargo: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 8/3 - 8/9
Posted by Unfreakable at 2014-08-11 4:22:11 PM (8 comments) | Permalink
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1972 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Aug 2014 at 11:00 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Fun way to start the week, enjoy the headlines. Cheers.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2014-08-03 to Sat 2014-08-09:

img.fark.net  An Amtrak train leaves New York City at 9AM, headed for Washington DC without its passengers. How long does it take before the conductor is fired?  

img.fark.net  Massive fire breaks out at recycling plant in London, filling the area with second-hand smoke  

img.fark.net  Jim Brady dies at age 73, will be buried after a five-day waiting period  

img.fark.net  Topless woman arrested and charged with theft after shoplifting at a local Macy's. Prosecutors are doubtful of getting a conviction as none of the witnesses got a good look at her face  

img.fark.net  US General specifically assassinated in Afghanistan  

img.fark.net  Kenyan journalist who once offered Bill Clinton 40 goats for Chelsea's hand in marriage is trampled to death by an elephant -- JUST LIKE VINCENT FOSTER  

img.fark.net  Body found in Merrimack pond, authorities to Monitor situation  

img.fark.net  Fight between family members at a golf course leaves a hole in one  

img.fark.net  Obama launches air strike on Iraq, cementing his record as Nobel Peace Prize winner with the most confirmed kills  

img.fark.net  It's only right that we let Customs enforce common-sense regulations against traveling with bagpipes, because if we just let pipers travel at their leisure it'll be total Somalia around here - or worse yet, Edinburgh  

img.fark.net  ISIS wants to "raise flag of Islam over the White House." Um, guys, you're six years too late  


Sports:

img.fark.net  MLB pitchers take nearly 100 years to reach the 1 millionth strikeout in 1976, but just 38 years more to reach 2 million. Thanks for doing your part, Chris Davis  

img.fark.net  Hall of Fame plans a traveling exhibit, going to cities where fans don't get to experience Major League Baseball. Like Houston  

img.fark.net  Jelena Jankovic snaps a bra strap during tennis match, almost loses her set  


Geek:

img.fark.net  MIT geeks claim potato chip bag speaks to them. Colorado residents claim this is old news, as their Funyuns have been softly whispering "Eat Me" for quite some time now  

img.fark.net  Ridiculously detailed Game Of Thrones subway maps - if you're going to a wedding, best not hop on the red line  

img.fark.net  Google is working to create an email encryption system that could resist government and hacker intrusion. Yahoo is mentioned as well, but subby just assumes they're just there to get the coffee  


Entertainment:

img.fark.net  After dying many times on screen "Scream Queen" Marilyn Burns shuffles off this mortal coil to that big scary isolated cabin in the sky with 4 teenage friends (at least one of whom is a virgin) whose van has broken down  

img.fark.net  A petition for Weird Al Yankovic to perform at the Super Bowl now has over 30,000 signatures. Though to put that in perspective, a petition to be allowed to drink from the fire hose has over 17,000 signatures  

img.fark.net  This fall, David Duchovny and Tea Leoni will star in The Ex-Files  


Politics:

img.fark.net  Today, Barack Obama says he's 53 years old. But yesterday, he said he was 52. If we can't trust him saying how old he is, how can we trust anything he says about Benghazi, immigration, the IRS, Obamacare, or even his birth certificate?  

img.fark.net  Poll: GOP is viewed unfavorably by 61% of women, 75% of Latinos, 61% of young voters, 100% of US presidents  

img.fark.net  Right-wingers are making their middle names 'Benghazi' on Facebook. The estate of President Ronald Beirut Reagan had no comment at press time  


Business:

img.fark.net  Standing room only sections on planes could result in lower fares. Most U.S. passengers immediately qualify to be reclassified as "cargo"  

img.fark.net  Malaysian Airlines stock trading suspended by Malaysian stock exchange to prevent stock price from... well, you know  

img.fark.net  World's oldest bank in Italy, dating back to 1472, reports heavy losses. Still awaiting repayment of first business loan to Cristoforo Colombo
· · ·

8 Comments     (+0 »)
 
 
2014-08-12 12:26:15 AM  
Okay, I was robbed this week. AGAIN!
 
2014-08-12 11:03:08 AM  

HawgWild: Okay, I was robbed this week. AGAIN!


A damnable shame. But you'll have your day.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-08-12 11:32:23 AM  
Unfreakable

The saying is every dog will have his day, not every Hawg will have his day.
 
2014-08-12 11:38:21 AM  

ZAZ: Unfreakable

The saying is every dog will have his day, not every Hawg will have his day.


Are you positive? It sounds more correct the other way.
 
2014-08-12 11:48:04 AM  
I was robbed, too.
 
2014-08-12 02:27:17 PM  
My name is HawgWild. Commander of the Armies of *sips whiskey*. General of the RIP Meme Legion. Loyal servant to the true Emperor, Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener. And I will have my headlines of the week, in this life or the next.
 
2014-08-12 02:34:53 PM  

HawgWild: My name is HawgWild. Commander of the Armies of *sips whiskey*. General of the RIP Meme Legion. Loyal servant to the true Emperor, Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener. And I will have my headlines of the week, in this life or the next.


*Hides behind Praetorian Guards*
 
2014-08-13 04:22:50 PM  
Hey! I finally got my second HOTW!
 
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