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Japan glowing over its 2020 Olympics selection, possible dyslexia for cure found, and you can do anything you want at Zombo border: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 9/1 - 9/7
Posted by Unfreakable at 2013-09-09 12:47:26 PM (5 comments) | Permalink

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1136 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Sep 2013 at 12:47 PM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Some good headlines this week. Enjoy

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2013-09-01 to Sat 2013-09-07:

img.fark.net  Woman offers her philatelic collection for hit man to stamp out her husband  

img.fark.net  Three foot alligator killed crossing Ontario highway. The fourth foot is presumably washing up on a shore in BC  

img.fark.net  Eating roadkill is about to become legal in Montana. In other words: nothing will change, but restaurants don't have to cover up the tire marks with veggies anymore  

img.fark.net  Ariel Castro swings through lifetime prison sentence in record time  

img.fark.net  Possible dyslexia for cure found  

img.fark.net  Man drives his truck through a wall to escape police officers. OH, YEAH  

img.fark.net  School apologizes for serving bacon sandwiches to Muslim students, claims it was Allah mistake  

img.fark.net  Ehlephant  

img.fark.net  Send help for victims of nationwide flooding, Niger pleas  

img.fark.net  "Bake mother a media leaf: The casual leather hermits rewards a hospital potato beheading in your rear with song wins and damning jean ale. You should sing covers with a bass man or a Seger in terrier womb"  

img.fark.net  DC to require a 24-hour waiting period for tattoos, presumably to obtain a proper translation of the Chinese character you thought was cool  


Sports:

img.fark.net  Sideline reporter Pam Oliver diagnosed with a concussion after being hit with an errant pass. Joe Namath unavailable for comment  

img.fark.net  Quoth the Raven... "seven scores"  

img.fark.net  Japan is glowing over its 2020 Olympics selection  


Geek:

img.fark.net  Researches search for Suleiman the Magnificent's heart, which subby assumes they need for a cultural victory in Civ5  

img.fark.net  Football fans are more likely to reach for junk food when their team is losing. Or winning. Or tied. Or not playing at all  

img.fark.net  Mumps outbreak now tied to a bar in New Jersey, is still the least harmful disease that people take with them after a night in a New Jersey bar  


Entertainment:

img.fark.net  Lamar Odom seen in Blockbuster Video store, says he hasn't been inside something that old and busted since Khloe Kardashian  

img.fark.net  Amanda Bynes' one year court ordered psych hold at the UCLA Medical Center will cost $1,277,500, not including the $10 co-pay  

img.fark.net  Ryan Gosling turned down a chance to star in Fifty Shades of Grey. Apparently, he didn't want to play the romantic interest to the guy from Sons of Anarchy  


Politics:

img.fark.net  Minnesota leads the country in taxation without respiration  

img.fark.net  Zombo border reopened after army standoff. This is Zombo border. Welcome. This is Zombo border. Welcome to Zombo border. You can do anything at Zombo border. Anything at all. The only limit is yourself  

img.fark.net  Conservative Australian leader elected, plans to annex Poland  


Business:

img.fark.net  United Airlines fined $350,000 for failing to make customer refunds quickly. Because at United, the very definition of a customer is someone demanding a refund  

img.fark.net  New report says the 401(k) system leaves most people with inadequate retirement savings. That report is called your 401(k) statement  

img.fark.net  Safeway fined $600,000 for violations of the Clean Air Act. On sale this week: Lettuce at $11 a head
· · ·

5 Comments     (+0 »)
 
 
2013-09-09 01:54:41 PM  
We really had a good week. But anything is possible at Zombo.com
 
2013-09-10 12:06:07 AM  
I couldn't help it - one comment wasn't enough
 
2013-09-10 11:38:00 AM  
The "bake mother a media leaf" one was pure gold. Took a minute to put it together, but subby was damn creative.
 
2013-09-10 02:58:10 PM  
My vote goes to "'Bake mother a media leaf. [...]'," but despite having a top-ten HotY finish for 2011, I don't know whether or how I can vote for headlines at this stage. Do I have to wait until the end of the year when the month-by-month semifinalists are compiled (phase 1) and the top finishers from each month are selected for the overall finals (phase 2)? If not, and if I can vote now, how do I do so? Thanks!
 
2013-09-10 05:53:34 PM  

SlowTimedRapid: My vote goes to "'Bake mother a media leaf. [...]'," but despite having a top-ten HotY finish for 2011, I don't know whether or how I can vote for headlines at this stage. Do I have to wait until the end of the year when the month-by-month semifinalists are compiled (phase 1) and the top finishers from each month are selected for the overall finals (phase 2)? If not, and if I can vote now, how do I do so? Thanks!


You have to have a TF account for when the monthly threads start coming; they're submitted to TFD for voting in the early stages.
 
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