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Jason Collins comes out as the third gay Wizard after Dumbledore and Gandalf, RIP Kris †, and Tebow prepares to rise again: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 4/28 - 5/4
Posted by Unfreakable at 2013-05-06 5:17:19 PM (12 comments) | Permalink

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2365 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 May 2013 at 5:17 PM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Some great headlines this week, and definitely a few that I think will be finalists in the Headline of the Year contests. Well done, submitters.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2013-04-28 to Sat 2013-05-04:  Captain's log: Passenger detained by TSA for not flushing toilet  Old and busted: Mid-life crises. New hotness: Quarter-life crises, also known as The Lohan  Sandy dumped 11 BILLION gallons of raw sewage on the New Jersey shoreline, then spent the next six weeks using medicated wipes and sitting on an inflatable donut  Deaf parents charged with killing their crying baby, waive their right to hearing  Leachman horses headed for kill plant. BLUCHER  Full moon gets partial blame for death of "Stonewall" Jackson after being shot by his own troops during the Civil War. Although to be fair they did use silver bullets  Man gets in fight over expired coupon. Surprisingly, giant chicken not involved  Taco Bell working on new 'low-end' menu. That's the joke  Man charged with killing wife with pickaxe, hitting Q to discard evidence  Transgender student denied access to Smith College all because of one little box  Chewbacca saves woman from motel fire. That does not make sense  

Sports:  The Jets have released Tim Tebow. He will be signed again in three days to judge the living and the dead, and his season will have no end  NBA player Jason Collins comes out as gay, which makes him the third gay Wizard after Gandalf and Dumbledore  High school golf team finishes three under car  

Geek:  Campaigners call for ban on "killer robots"...or at least some sort of preset kill limit  Scientists believe they've figured out plasma cooling that would bring them another step closer to a fusion reactor, are now trying to make one small enough to fit in a Delorean  Mars rover Opportunity reboots and goes into standby mode. ALL RIGHT, WHO HERE REMEMBERS THE DAMN PASSWORD?  

Entertainment:  Master of the Cello dies. With the hippin' and the hoppin', and the bippin', and the boppin'  Star Wars is being translated into the Navajo language -- despite some reservations  Kris †  

Politics:  Supreme Court Justice Stephen Breyer has shoulder replacement surgery after a bicycle accident. In an effort to balance the court he opts for two left shoulders  Justice Pot calls President Kettle an Uncle Tom  For US diplomats, "Speak softly and carry a big stick" has turned to "Speak loudly and flail around with the stick like a blindfolded drunk going after a piñata"  

Business:  Penske 1Q profit rises 23% due to the hard work of George Costanza  France cuts taxes to become more start-up friendly for businesses. First time ever that "France" and "friendly" have ever been used in the same sentence  Al Jazeera opens a bureau in Detroit. Apparently they want to show their viewers in the Middle East that things could be worse
· · ·

12 Comments     (+0 »)
2013-05-06 05:26:29 PM  
Really good week for headlines
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-05-06 05:45:21 PM  
Unfreakable: Really good week for headlines

Yet none of mine are on the list.
2013-05-06 05:57:54 PM  
Woohoo, my first headline of the week.
2013-05-06 06:11:33 PM  

ZAZ: Unfreakable: Really good week for headlines

Yet none of mine are on the list.

Which is a shame, you've had some fantastic headlines before.
2013-05-06 06:20:15 PM  

pag1107: Woohoo, my first headline of the week.

Congratulations! :-)
2013-05-06 06:33:10 PM  
Why, thank you.
I would like to celebrate being an Entertainment HOTW with this picture of Bill Cosby made out of Jello shots.
i229.photobucket.comView Full Size
2013-05-06 08:30:32 PM  

pag1107: Woohoo, my first headline of the week.

Me too!
2013-05-06 08:35:38 PM  

UNAUTHORIZED FINGER: pag1107: Woohoo, my first headline of the week.

Me too!

Alright..Which one did wut???
2013-05-06 08:47:01 PM  
Kris †

But I have to say that puffy999 said it in a post in a previous thread. I didn't see it until after I submitted the headline, and didn't know that he'd posted it, but I give credit to him that he thought of it first. He's been very gracious about it; didn't even mention it, and calbert brought it to my attention. No drama, and a gracious attitude makes puffy999 aces in my book. When his TF runs out, I owe him a month.
2013-05-07 02:00:23 AM  
awwww, my "George Bush. Terminal" one didn't make it.

ah well.
2013-05-07 11:02:56 AM  

ZAZ: Unfreakable: Really good week for headlines

Yet none of mine are on the list.

nor mine

but then again my headlines are like AAA Amateur "ha ha" funny level. I haven't gone to the pros yet
2013-05-07 12:40:39 PM  

spidermann: awwww, my "George Bush. Terminal" one didn't make it.

ah well.

It shoulda. That was a good 'un.
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