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Headline of the Year preliminaries starting on Totalfark this week, and here are some other Headlines of the Week for 11/11 - 11/17
Posted by Unfreakable at 2012-11-23 7:54:59 PM (10 comments) | Permalink
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1556 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Nov 2012 at 7:56 PM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

This one's crazy late. We got started on Headline of the Year preliminary threads Tuesday but a project on Wednesday and Thanksgiving yesterday sort of dented the progress I had started. For those of you who have TF, the two threads are here:

In the meantime, here are the ones from this week.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2012-11-11 to Sat 2012-11-17:  After Hurricane Sandy, Nestle donates hundreds of Hot Pockets to Newark residents. First water, then fire, now lava - they can't catch a break  Woman attacked outside church by man with dark hair, full beard. He appeared cross  Steven Spielberg's "Lincoln" opens in theaters, despite the fact that Lincoln historically doesn't do well in theaters  Vegetative patient clinically shown to be conscious after 12 years, has limited communication, given job greenlighting Fark links  The Israeli Defense Forces have just declared war over Twitter, UN to respond with Instagram'ed angry letter and Arab league via "Thing we dislike about Israel" Pinterest board  Diamond formerly belonging to Austro-Hungarian archduke sells for $21.5 million at auction, shortly thereafter, it was fatally stabbed by a radical Serbian brooch  Exotic dancer accused of human smuggling. Her really lumpy thong was a dead giveaway  Turkey recognizes new Syrian rebel group as the legitimate leader of Syria. US recognizes Turkey is delicious with stuffing and cranberry relish  Suspected murderer John McAfee asks around the internet if anyone knows of a cell phone that can't be tracked. Expected to soon tweet his complaints about how expensive lye is  New report warns that terrorists could black out an entire section of the U.S. by attacking our power grid. Or, they could just wait for the next moderate rain storm  U.S. Secret Service agents freak out when they mistake relatively benign water monitors for carnivorous komodo dragons... then later they all have a laugh about it over some drinks and prostitutes

Sports:  Conspiracy theorist claims that the Minnesota Timberwolves are hoarding white players to boost ticket sales. Protecting the stadium's baskets from wear and tear from slam dunks is just a lucky bonus  Study concludes soccer players may get long-term brain damage, just from heading the ball -- affording them yet another chance to flop on the ground and feign injury  Former Chicago Bears Coach Mike Ditka suffered a minor stroke, finished his pork chop

Geek:  Scientists have successfully cloaked an object perfectly for the first time. Nothing to see here, move along  Yearly birth rates continue to fall, although vasectomies are no longer responsible for the vas deferens  The lightest metal on Earth. No, I'm not talking about Metallica  

Entertainment:  Creedence Clearwater Revival member John Fogerty's new book will detail his unique songwriting ability, career as a rock star, early success as the model for Dutch Boy Paints  John Mellencamp and Stephen King finish work on their collaboration project: A musical. It is expected to be a catchy hodgepodge of Americana with an unsatisfying ending  Taylor Swift begins writing a love advice column for Seventeen Magazine. Look for it on the same page with Charles Barkley's golf tips

Politics:  Hurricane Sandy forces unexpected New Jersey tax hikes. Governor Christie promptly moves to have Sandy officially registered as a Democrat  Pulitzer Prize winners Doris Kearns Goodwin and Tony Kushner say that Abraham Lincoln would be a Democrat today. We've recently reached Lincoln for comment: "...,"  Officials in Ecuador ban donkey from participating in council elections -- as opposed to the United States, where it's considered vital to have representatives from both parties

Business:  Apple announces resolution of dispute with HTC, cross-licensing of patents, and unlimited clean energy for its offices generated by Steve Jobs spinning in his grave  McAfee releases third quarter threats report, forgets to list their founder  Airlines paint mustaches on planes to support Movember, invite the public to take mile-high mustache rides
· · ·

10 Comments     (+0 »)
2012-11-23 08:22:41 PM  
To headline
2012-11-23 08:25:01 PM  
What do I win?
2012-11-23 08:28:13 PM  

Silly Jesus: What do I win?

2012-11-23 08:50:58 PM  

Indubitably: To headline

Is there a grammar error I'm missing?
2012-11-23 09:18:33 PM  
Steven Spielberg's "Lincoln" opens in theaters, despite the fact that Lincoln historically doesn't do well in theaters

If that movie wins an Oscar, this headline MUST get a HOTY.
2012-11-23 09:23:41 PM  
/rushes off to copyright "HOTY"
2012-11-23 09:35:19 PM  
Since a good chunk of greenlights are now simply cut-and-paste from the linked articles, the candidates are pretty slim this year.
2012-11-23 10:05:35 PM  
Denied yet again.
2012-11-24 02:52:05 PM  
Pretty sub-par round.
2012-11-24 03:05:24 PM  

D-Liver: Pretty sub-par round.

Thanks....and I was feeling good aboot myself for making the cut with Ditka
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