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A few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 8/26 - 9/1
Posted by Unfreakable at 2012-09-06 7:48:10 AM (1 comment) | Permalink
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241 clicks; posted to Publicity » on 06 Sep 2012 at 8:32 AM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Some good headlines this week. Enjoy

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2012-08-26 to Sat 2012-09-01:  Taliban leader Mullah Dadullah killed; Mullah Bobullah, Mullah Bananafana Fofullah, and Mullah Meemimomullah go into hiding. Dadullah  Man who was deaf breaks down as he hears music for the first time, describes it as being "like the first time you kiss a girl". So, he listened to music for the first time with his kind of ugly cousin in a closet at a family reunion?  Prince, Pals close Facebook accounts, Caught sayof  Man dressed as Sasquatch tries to make a Bigfoot hoax, Yeti only makes headlines  Dear Diary, Today at work I *successfully* collected semen from THREE meter-long crocodiles. You should have seen the looks in their eyes. SO glad I quit med school to follow my dreams. It's not a job when you love it. Later, Stumpy Joe  Wrecking crews uncover abandoned underground S&M sex club in Kentucky. "This is the weirdest I've ever found," said one worker who had never seen Drew's basement  Amsterdam plane situation is NOT a situation. Authorities blame it on miscommunication between the tower and plane. Apparently, saying "Hi, Jaques" when greeting the tower operator is a bad move  New Jersey mail carrier uses route to deliver cocaine. Postal authorities become suspicious after the entire route was finished in 17 minutes  Thieves break into Quebec warehouse and steal $30M worth of... maple syrup. Geez Canada, even your crimes are adorable  125 students in Harvard "Introduction to Congress" class are under investigation for cheating and plagiarism; students face expulsion and lucrative patronage jobs if found guilty  A long-term study shows that bears will not attack a menstruating woman, but that a menstruating woman will attack damn near anything

Sports:  Rex Grossman puts up a perfect QB rating in NFL game. Looks like that Mayan Apocalypse is right on schedule  Penn State bans "Sweet Caroline" from being played at their football games due to the inappropriate "Touching Me, Touching You" lyrics, will replace the traditional sing-a-long with rhythmic slapping sounds  Takeru Kobayashi sets new world record by taking on 110 wieners in 10 minutes, narrowly beating the record set by your mom

Geek:  Meteor explodes over Wales. Local resident: "Roedd ffyniant enfawr - Mae'n swnio fel bom yn mynd i ffwrdd"  Video games turn 40, still living in parents' basement  Manufacturer creates television controlled by gaze, just like musical theatre

Entertainment:  Let no man deceive you by any means: for that day shall not come, except there come a falling away first, and that man of sin be revealed, the son of Snooki  Madonna booed for showing up late to concert. Explains she fell asleep during Matlock  Courtney Stodden blasted with porn offers upon turning 18, presumably in the face and hair

Politics:  Gov. Nikki Haley: "Our health care system remains broken despite Obamacare spending almost $6 billion next year in South Carolina." What do we want? TIME TRAVEL. When do we want it? IRRELEVANT  It's easy to grin, when your ship comes in, and it's flying a Caymans flag. But the man worthwhile, is the man who can smile, even though his son is named Tagg  Dammit Fox News, how could you have a list of the unhealthiest Presidents and not include William Howard Taft? He weighed 325 pounds. He got stuck in the White House bath tub. Teddy Roosevelt tried to hunt him for sport

Business:  Colorado beer industry takes steps to eliminate "smoky" taste from local water so as to avoid giving Coors any semblance of flavor  New study says that parents are ignoring the college cost crisis. All agree that they're too preoccupied with the mortgage crisis, employment crisis, economic crisis  Thalidomide victims are flippant about drug maker's apology
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1 Comment     (+0 »)
2012-09-07 08:41:57 AM  
Nobody commented?  Did I miss a memo or something?
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