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A few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 1/8 - 1/14
Posted by Unfreakable at 2012-01-19 1:35:49 PM (1 comment) | Permalink
More: FarkBlog, geeks

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92 clicks; posted to Publicity » on 19 Jan 2012 at 1:38 PM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Some good headlines in this batch. Good job, submitters.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2012-01-08 to Sat 2012-01-14:

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  Police: Man Drove Into Flock of Seagulls. Bystander: I ran    
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  North Korea rejects "we'll give you food if you don't make nukes" offer, thus marking the first time Kim Jong-un ever turned down an offer of food    
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  Our long national nightmare is finally over as Southern Indiana limestone workers end their strike. Finally, we can buy some fresh limestone again. Build limestone houses and furniture. Drive limestone cars    
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  Graffiti artist tagged by train    
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  "Bomb Explosion Destroys Bridge in Sulu." OH MY    
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  Dwarf left paralyzed and Grumpy after being thrown by Dopey drunk. Doc tells him he may need a wheelchair, so he's not Happy    
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  OJ deemed safe. That is, of course, unless your last name is "Brown" or "Goldman"    
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  ♫ Spider-Man ♫ Spider-Man ♫ Gets stuck in a vent 'cause he can ♫ He is drunk off his ass ♫ No, his skills aren't first class ♫ WATCH OUT ♫ We caught the Spider-Man ♫  

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  Woman says her fake penis got her fired from her job.... big deal lady, my real one has gotten me fired from at least a dozen    
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  Missing algebra teacher found dead -- investigators looking to solve for why, query ex    
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  Truck crash kills over 200 sheep, according to drowsy workers    
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Sports:

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  Tony Sparano hired as offensive coordinator of the    
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  Colts hire ex- Philadelphia Eagle director of player personnel Ryan Grigson as new GM. Will immediately report to Jim Irsay, Peyton Manning    
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  The Senators shut out the league leading Rangers in New York last night. Quit laughing dammit, this is what the Mayans were talking about    
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Geek:

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  Are shaved bare porn actresses re-wiring the brains of men who watch internet porn? Yes. And so are those videos of 2 women, 1 cat, a feather duster, two bags of chips, and a jar of peanut butter    
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  Unlike the people who buy them, TVs will be getting brighter, thinner, and more social    
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  Captive cheese fungus can gobble up spills, forming a self-cleaning surface. UNBRIELIEVABLE    
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Entertainment:

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  Chaz Bono needs $45,000 for upcoming addadictomy operation    
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  J Lo open to returning for In Living Color specials. In other news the token white chick whose name you don't remember would be thrilled to return for the specials, assuming she can get time off from the car wash    
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  Axl Rose to serve jury duty. He will listen to your SHA-NA-NA-NA SHA-NA-NA-NA SHA-NA-NA-NA PLEAS, PLEEEEEEEEEEEEAS    
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Politics:

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  Santorum voices support for SOPA-like Internet regulation. He doesn't endorse the use of SOPA, but pirates clearly annoy him    
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  Romney: any focus on the massive wealth gap is just "envy." He then proceeded to consume a kilo of beluga caviar in front of a homeless man, pausing to burble, "Ugh. I don't know if I can finish this"    
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  Ron Paul says he and his supporters are "nibbling at the heels" of Mitt Romney, making Romney the first candidate in US history to be in danger of being nibbled to death by dicks    
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Business:

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  "Angela Merkel has the whip hand in an orgy of austerity" - man, those Germans sure do freaky porn    
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  The Better Business Bureau names the top ten scams of 2011. The Better Business Bureau is suspiciously missing from the list    
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  Your bank wants to be your best friend. That's strange, best friends don't usually beat and rape you    
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· · ·

1 Comment     (+0 »)
 
 
2012-01-19 04:11:02 PM  
Guns N' Roses and A Flock of Seagulls in the same HOTW post. I love it!
 
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