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Fark NotNewsletter: Great news, everyone!
Posted by DisseminationMonkey at 2021-11-24 12:52:29 PM (35 comments) | Permalink
More: FarkBlog

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1464 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Nov 2021 at 8:27 PM (13 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



This year's Farketplace is reopening this Friday for your Black Friday, Small Business Saturday and Cyber Monday shopping needs! In case you've missed it so far, Farketplace is a thread where Farkers are invited to share information about their online shops and small businesses. There's a much better explanation in the Farketplace thread, so go check it out, and see all the awesome stuff your fellow Farkers are selling. And if you happen to make and sell, for example, handmade ear massagers, or you have a business writing custom ballads for pet salamanders, go tell everyone in the Farketplace thread about how to give you money in exchange for goods and services. Be sure to read the posts from Moderator at the top of the page, and don't go threadjacking in there or you will be eaten by a Drue. 

XOXO,

DisseminationMonkey


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
KarmicDisaster explained how a couple accidentally got on a plane to Greece when they were supposed to fly to Spain
wingnut396 agreed with Ker_Thwap's statement about corporations having too much power
Tom-Servo shared a story about a very frustrating experience with poor customer service
lindalouwho refused to be baited by Redh8t's construction equipment expertise
I Have A Bo Burnham GIF For That spoke up for a man who complained he's only known for his record-breaking manhose
Godscrack found something fishy about the front end of an Amazon truck that was severed by a train
I Have A Bo Burnham GIF For That argued that 69 can still be funny
Palined Parenthood told us what happened after a DoorDash delivery driver pooped in an apartment lobby
DannyBrandt was confused about why a photo of speakers seized by NYPD did not show them in pairs
FrancoFile considered what would possibly be a power couple with too much power

Smart:
Smock Pot considered the reason a doctor gave for refusing to give a woman a hysterectomy
Funk Brothers looked at some of the sketchy circumstances surrounding the trial of the men who killed Ahmaud Arbery
Ker_Thwap discussed how employers are still able to used forced arbitration and NDAs to hide bad behavior
Circusdog320 shared a different view of a semitruck taking a nap against a guardrail on Deception Pass Bridge
Redh8t had kind words for Wil
dionysusaur had a theory about why swing music had a brief revival in the '90s
Pocket Ninja checked into whether an excavator operator was indeed practicing sorcery

CSB Sunday Morning: Lost & Found
Smart: Otera shared the story of a hungry kitten (with photos!)
Funny: ElPrimitivo told us what it's like to be a snow angel

And from the previous week, because I forgotSchool plays
Smart: With Six You Get Spittle had a wonderful experience when making up for a decision made back in high school
Funny: Winterlight learned that the villain always faces justice

CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread for Farkers to share true stories from their own lives based on a weekly topic. If you have a topic idea for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please contact Farkback ahead of time, or just submit it on Saturday afternoon/evening. Please note: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning threads have a high likelihood of being greenlit, there is no guarantee they will be.

Politics Funny:
New Rising Sun pointed out that a member of Steve Bannon's entourage is embarking on a journey of discovery
bighairyguy asked a question about Kyle Rittenhouse being found not guilty
I Have A Bo Burnham GIF For That had a question for Arizona Rep. Paul Gosar
Lumbar Puncture explained why the family of a woman who had COVID-19 was correct about the required dose of ivermectin
thatguyoverthere70 figured out which Fark account belongs to Stephen Colbert

Politics Smart:
berylman shared an opinion about radio and TV personalities who get "inspiration" from Fark
Bootleg examined one police officer's complaints about the unfairness of the world
NewportBarGuy argued that Republicans have silly opinions about the current economy
MattytheMouse pointed to Elon Musk as a great example
psilocyberguy reminded us that there's still a big issue to be fixed with USPS even after Louis DeJoy is gone


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week

Photoshops:
TrollingForColumbine found out there's jealousy among cryptids
RedZoneTuba designed an archery logo for CJ, the child of a Farker
Stantz drew an unusual anatomical model on the chalkboard
RedZoneTuba brought fiddles to a hockey fight
Yammering_Splat_Vector showed us the photo album of a couple of horny tourists
Stantz discovered a floating island
Driedsponge gave the young archer a pair of wings
RedZoneTuba found out it was a mistake to gopher the football yet again
Yammering_Splat_Vector arranged a duet
retrophil uncovered a clue about the fate of five tourists who went missing in the 1960s

Fartist FridayLudicrous animals
kabloink created "a Dog Cow with racoon feet and tail"

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: Fartist Friday will be taking this holiday weekend off to sleep off a turkey coma, but will return next week with a new theme.

FarktographyFaded
Lovesandwich photographed a defunct wooden grain elevator


Fark Headlines of the Week

A selection of some of the top headlines from last week

Let's go Bannon

DC's mask mandate to end Monday. Batman inconsolable

Second mushroom picker rescued after six days missing in Olympic National Forest. There's probably a morel to this story

Barbra Streisand attends trial for the murder of Ahmaud Arbery

Marlins get Head from Rays; ocean life is kinky

Patriots score yet another 25 unanswered points against the Falcons

Forty years ago today, a song was released that would become the bane of one person in every area code in the United States

"It's a Wonderful Life" to be performed in the original Klingon. Every time a bell rings, a warrior gets his bat'leth

🎵All is quiet, on New Years Day. The coup is plotted, it's underway. And I've got a memo, a memo, a memo for Pence detailing how to stay. I sent it to him, on New Year's Day🎵

It's fortunate that General Flynn couldn't find somebody at DoD better than Ezra

House orders Gosar to cease any and all supernatural activity and return forthwith to his place of origin or to the nearest convenient parallel dimension

I assure you we are closed


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

Another fun time on last week's Quiz, although we still haven't determined who exactly buys a $10,000 Gucci XBox. On the Quiz itself, Blackstone makes his way into the 1000 club with a score of 1011, followed by TheMothership in second with 984 and Denjiro in third with 963. No Catchy Nickname makes fourth with 940, and bud jones makes it into the top five with 934.

The hardest question on last week's Hard Quiz was about the choice of vehicle for a 54-year-old Richmond, IN man who led police on a slow pursuit for over an hour, Only 39% of quiztakers knew he had stolen a street sweeper from a nearby construction site to drive through town and peoples' yards before crashing it into the river. No word on street cleanliness post-chase. 

The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was about the former owner of a pair of diamond bracelets that had recently sold at auction for $8.4 million. 87% of quiztakers knew that the last Queen of France before the French Revolution was Marie Antionette. Anne Boleyn was the second wife of England's Henry VIII I Am I Am and also lost her head at the beginning of the English Reformation, and Mary Tudor was Henry VIII's daughter who tried (unsuccessfully) to reverse the English Reformation and put more power back into the hands of the monarchy.

The hardest question on last week's Easy Quiz was about this year's Thanksgiving Doughnuts collection. Only 37% of quiztakers knew that you could Pumpkin Pie Doughnuts, Cranberry Orange Doughnuts, Dutch Apple Pie Doughnuts, and Gobbler Doughnuts at Krispy Kreme. Oddly enough, few picked up on the fact that Krispy Kreme uses the "Doughnut" spelling, while the other choice, Dunkin'; spells their product "Donut." 

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was also about empty calories - only this time, Krispy Kreme was the wrong choice. 86% of quiztakers knew that Cinnabon was now selling pints of their signature frosting at certain stores and through their app. Because sometimes, just adding more pure sugar to your dish isn't enough - you also need some saturated fat. Saturated with what? In this case, more sugar. 

If you missed out on last week's Quiz, now's a great to time to catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz now that you know some of the answers. Congratulations once again to this week's winners, and we'll do it all again this week.
· · ·

35 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-11-24 12:55:32 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 12:56:12 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 1:02:03 PM  
sm.ign.comView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 1:04:30 PM  

fragMasterFlash: [Fark user image 425x406]


Fark: bringing me sentences I didn't expect to hear today (or ever) since the turn of the century!
 
2021-11-24 1:06:00 PM  
Yay, Otera! Yay, Jack! ♥♥
 
2021-11-24 1:08:31 PM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 1:35:26 PM  

fragMasterFlash: [Fark user image image 425x406]


Hahahaha! Damn. That's cold. Hahaha.
 
2021-11-24 1:38:02 PM  

fragMasterFlash: [Fark user image 425x406]


So wrong yet so funny.
 
2021-11-24 1:41:34 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 1:55:51 PM  
I am so smart. S m r t

I mean s m a r t
 
2021-11-24 2:05:44 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

Fark user imageView Full Size

"Dat's me! I won? Yay! I know what winning means!"
Fark user imageView Full Size


Thanks y'all!


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 2:10:09 PM  
I call my penis "Small Business."

I mean .... wait, what?
 
2021-11-24 2:11:20 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 2:22:26 PM  
So I've been wondering, has anyone suggested or looked into making a darkmode for Fark yet?

Fark is hard on the ol' eyeballs in the middle of a 3 day sleepless bender, so bright.
 
2021-11-24 2:26:37 PM  

Boo_Guy: So I've been wondering, has anyone suggested or looked into making a darkmode for Fark yet?

Fark is hard on the ol' eyeballs in the middle of a 3 day sleepless bender, so bright.


Someone gave me this, but it doesn't work on my mobile.
 
2021-11-24 2:32:11 PM  

Boo_Guy: So I've been wondering, has anyone suggested or looked into making a darkmode for Fark yet?

Fark is hard on the ol' eyeballs in the middle of a 3 day sleepless bender, so bright.


What would Fark users know about 3 day sleepless benders?  Surely not here?
 
2021-11-24 2:53:50 PM  

Cafe Threads: Boo_Guy: So I've been wondering, has anyone suggested or looked into making a darkmode for Fark yet?

Fark is hard on the ol' eyeballs in the middle of a 3 day sleepless bender, so bright.

Someone gave me this, but it doesn't work on my mobile.


I have something similar for Firefox, but it's a global switch, so turning it on makes a lot of websites including Fark look screwy. None of the ones I've tried really work well.

A toggle switch at the top of the website to change from light to dark modes on the fly that is made by and for Fark would be better, like that website that starts with R that shall not be named.
 
2021-11-24 3:50:22 PM  
Thanks for the votes. Have a Happy Thanksgiving!

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 4:50:51 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 5:04:48 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 5:14:43 PM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 6:12:29 PM  

libranoelrose: [i.imgur.com image 640x426] [View Full Size image _x_]


You win.
 
2021-11-24 6:23:37 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 6:36:57 PM  

libranoelrose: [i.imgur.com image 640x426] [View Full Size image _x_]


Nice strap work.
 
2021-11-24 7:59:20 PM  

Boo_Guy: So I've been wondering, has anyone suggested or looked into making a darkmode for Fark yet?

Fark is hard on the ol' eyeballs in the middle of a 3 day sleepless bender, so bright.


Dark mode is for entitled children.

Green screen mode or GTFO.
 
2021-11-24 8:26:40 PM  

Boo_Guy: So I've been wondering, has anyone suggested or looked into making a darkmode for Fark yet?

Fark is hard on the ol' eyeballs in the middle of a 3 day sleepless bender, so bright.


Yeah. That will happen right after an edit post mode is enabled
 
2021-11-24 9:00:23 PM  

I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: Boo_Guy: So I've been wondering, has anyone suggested or looked into making a darkmode for Fark yet?

Fark is hard on the ol' eyeballs in the middle of a 3 day sleepless bender, so bright.

Dark mode is for entitled children.

Green screen mode or GTFO.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 9:11:54 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 9:22:22 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-24 11:33:39 PM  
Happy thanksgiving, all
 
2021-11-25 12:47:31 AM  

arrogantbastich: [Fark user image image 425x633]


Fark user imageView Full Size

Like a guy who owns a boat. He'll probably kill you after a little fun.
 
2021-11-25 1:26:05 AM  

TheGogmagog: arrogantbastich: [Fark user image image 425x633]

[Fark user image 532x793]
Like a guy who owns a boat. He'll probably kill you after a little fun.


Not Travis McGee
 
2021-11-25 7:50:41 AM  

wearsmanyhats: TheGogmagog: arrogantbastich: [Fark user image image 425x633]

[Fark user image 532x793]
Like a guy who owns a boat. He'll probably kill you after a little fun.

Not Travis McGee


C'mon, just quit posing and get on the damn boat...
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-11-25 8:41:22 AM  

libranoelrose: [i.imgur.com image 640x426]


Two questions:
1. WAT?
2. Why wasn't her helmet strapped on?  What was she expecting an loose helmet to protect?
 
2021-11-25 11:42:21 PM  
Gratitude.
 
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