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Fark NotNewsletter: Retiring? OhFark!
Posted by DisseminationMonkey at 2021-05-19 2:20:10 PM, edited 2021-05-19 2:21:14 PM (49 comments) | Permalink
More: FarkBlog

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1293 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 May 2021 at 9:57 PM (4 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



________________________

A message from Drew Curtis:  
________________________ 

Hey everyone, hope your week's been going well.

I'm taking my younger two kids to get vaccinated later today. It's pretty weird having them so excited about getting a shot. Storm got his back when older kids got cleared.  Speaking of which, want to feel old?  He's going to be able to vote in the next election.  Which in Kentucky will probably be for city dog-catcher and town drunk.  No, I'm not running.

At 7 p.m. Thursday - the Fark News Livestream returns!  I think even if we didn't have time constraints I'd probably still want to stick to the once a week schedule - gives me an entire week to find the 10-15 best stories.  Added bonus this week - one of them is a link we posted on Fark, but I don't know how many people saw it.  It's a huge deal for medical science.  Find out which one it is on the stream Thursday night.

Added bonus: I've heard from a bunch of folks they'd love us to do another Fark Movie Night on the livestream again.  Sounds like Dallan can definitely do one a month - next one is tentatively Friday, June 4, movie TBA.

Also, sometime this week we'll be testing a new Google native unit.  As per usually, you won't notice if you have TotalFark or BareFark (sign up today!).  If you see it, however, just a heads up that it's gonna look a little weird.  We've got a formatting issue with it, which we're trying to decide if it's worth fixing or not.  So we're going to run it for the day, and if it moves the needle, we'll work on making it look better.  If it doesn't, then we'll never speak of it again.  Meanwhile, subscriptions really do keep the lights on around here.  I love popping into the comments and seeing so many TotalFark and BareFark badges.

Speaking of badges, it's finally time for us to think about retiring the selling of the OhFark pandemic badge.  We haven't settled on a date yet, but the quarantine is looking like it's all but over in the U.S. - at least 'til next fall when all the unbelievers kick off another wave amongst themselves.  Get vaccinated, folks!  Anyhow, OhFark is still available for purchase, but soon we will stop selling it for good - but it'll remain next to your login forever.  Get yours now!
________________________

We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.
________________________ 


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
vudukungfu saw an invitation to share stories about doing dumb things in the military
sniderman had a photo of the backup system of Colonial Pipeline's computer network
Oysterman shared an unaltered version of the photo Dax Shepard posted of Kristen Bell doing nude yoga
FormlessOne envisioned a discussion that a 2-year-old who shot his parents will soon be having
bearded clamorer was glad to see an article about portable generators
bearded clamorer had suspicions about the story about the toddler shooting his parents
Clarence Brown thought about why The Sun agreed to take a reporter back after he killed his wife if he remained confined to his office
Evil Mackerel recognized the ornate staircase in a real estate listing
grokca took offense at The Sun being called out for writing a long obituary for one of their reporters without mentioning that he murdered his wife
question_dj explained why Colonial Pipeline paid ransom to hackers instead of using the backups they had
Lokilaw2012 let us know what people on Mount Everest in a photo that poorjon posted were talking about

Smart:
Pocket Ninja shared a story about accidentally walking into a vegetarian restaurant
Sword and Shield reacted to Massachusetts State Police troopers complaining they can't live on $94,000 a year
grumpfuff told us the best reason to keep wearing masks indefinitely
Nuuu performed a death-defying stunt right before our very eyes
Warthog defended Dartmouth Medical School students who have been accused of cheating during online exams
Tyrosine shared a story to illustrate that no matter how talented you are, people will eventually yeet you into the sun if you're too hard to work with
vudukungfu saw an invitation to share stories about doing dumb things in the military
edmo had a suggestion for dealing with people like the guy who keeps buying Teslas and riding in the back while they drive themselves

Politics Funny:
Irving Maimway let us know what Ben Garrison was on about in a recent comic
King Something explained why it was okay if the audit servers in Arizona were connected to a Wi-Fi router
Driver came up with a way to get unvaccinated people to wear masks
snocone was flustered by a big lie about the Big Lie
Angry Drunk Bureaucrat let Shostie know what to expect at Ben Garrison's "Woke Disney"

Politics Smart:
narocroc speculated on the reason the CDC announced a loosening of guidelines for fully vaccinated people
another one of them listed some of the consequences of the "normal tourist visit" at the Capitol on January 6
hubiestubert looked at Tomi Lahren's claims that she was harassed over the weekend
Dodo David described how good churches have handled the pandemic
FormlessOne figured Trumpism is not an extreme ideology anymore


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down

Photoshops:
west.la.lawyer gave this fellow a sign of love instead of hate
Yammering_Splat_Vector replaced this message with one of surprising self-awareness
Mojongo didn't want Farkers to end up like this poor guy
zeon brought back a classic protest
Kick The Chair skipped too many leg days
RedZoneTuba helped this man be more honest with himself and others
Circusdog320 had a message for proud idiots
Kick The Chair gave these models a look that never goes out of style
clovercat found a rodent in the Capitol
zeon snatched a new body for this squirrel

Fartist Friday: Design a new galaxy
Diocletian's Last Cabbage painted a galaxy for PC users

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: World Turtle Day is this weekend. In homage to the epic Fark "I Saw A Turtle" thread of yore, we present: "I Draw A Turtle." We'll be F'Artisting up the classic "Tippy The Turtle" drawing (from this contest, for you whippersnappers). Using any medium, add on to Tippy's drawing, or use a Draw program to create your own "Tippy The Turtle"

Farktography: Happy Farktography Anniversary 16
beerrun took a beautiful photo from up in the air


Fark Parties

Friday, July 9, 2021: Buffalo, NY Fark Party (with all public health guidance carefully followed)


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

Another fun time on the Quiz this week, where we learned that a Roomba without googly eyes is merely a floor duster with no personality. On the Quiz itself, kjlopey came out on top with 987, followed by the_colonel in second with 966 and Russell_Secord in third with 931. PTP_Professor made fourth with 922, and Oliver Twisted rounds out the top 5 with 905,

The hardest question on the Hard Quiz was about which 1,454 ft. tall national landmark was officially opened from the White House by then-President Herbert Hoover. Only 35% of quiztakers knew that it was the Empire State Building which was lit up for the first time when Hoover flipped the switch. For the record, Boulder Dam was formally dedicated by President Franklin Roosevelt in person in 1936 (after which he headed to Las Vegas, because hey, Vegas), and is a mere 726.4 ft. in height.  The carving of Mount Rushmore National Monument stopped in 1941, although each figure received its own dedication. The mountain itself is 5,725 ft. above sea level, and each face is approximately 60 ft. high.

The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was about those wacky Japanese and how the town of Noto in Ishikawa Province spent several million yen of COVID relief money. 83% of quiztakers knew that the town decided what would really get their tourism jumpstarted would be a giant statue of a squid. I mean, the town really is known for its squid, and you can bet that more than one American town would go for a statue of Optimus Prime if they thought they could get away with it.

The hardest question on this week's Easy Quiz was about which Oscar-winning artist was going back on tour in Europe in 2022. Only 50% of quiztakers recognized that "Tuskegee" was the last studio album by the artist from Tuskegee, AL - Lionel Richie. Richie took home an Oscar for Best Original Song for "Say You, Say Me: featured in the film "White Nights". I mean, pretty much no one saw the film about a Russian ballet dancer, so it's understandable that no one remembers it won an Oscar. Interesting note - the song did not appear on the soundtrack due to licensing issues.

The easiest question on this week's Easy Quiz was about the return of pizza nemesis The Noid and which pizza chain will help you avoid him. 88% of quiztakers remembered him from Domino's commercials - and the several video games titles released by the chain. Personally, I always thought the Little Caesar's guy could take him, but back then Little Caesar's never took the fight to him by avoiding delivery altogether.

If you missed out on the Quiz last week, you can catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz here. Congratulations to the winners, and we'll do it all again this week.
· · ·

49 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-05-19 2:24:25 PM  
Speaking of which, want to feel old?  He's going to be able to vote in the next election.

JFC, so will mine.  O.o

/TEAM OLD
 
2021-05-19 2:28:39 PM  
Inappropriate question mark, you had me worried for a minute.
 
2021-05-19 2:30:22 PM  
Wait, the pandemic is almost over?

Wouldn't know by what gets greened.
 
2021-05-19 2:32:45 PM  

NM Volunteer: Inappropriate question mark, you had me worried for a minute.


It's not inappropriate. :P

LineNoise: Wait, the pandemic is almost over?

Wouldn't know by what gets greened.


Nope, just the badge, unfortunately.
 
2021-05-19 2:34:13 PM  
I was hoping Oystermanwould make the NotNewsletter. It was a great twist on a classic.
 
2021-05-19 2:35:21 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-05-19 2:39:22 PM  

OtherLittleGuy: I was hoping Oystermanwould make the NotNewsletter. It was a great twist on a classic.


I have no idea what you're talking about, but if it was from Sunday through today, it might be in next week's.
 
2021-05-19 2:44:06 PM  
I DID IT!  I MADE THE NNL!!  AT LONG LAST!!!

I!  AM!  A!
SOMEBODDYYYYYYYY!!1!11!ONEONEWONWON!
 
2021-05-19 2:44:39 PM  
(pant, pant, gasp, pant)
 
2021-05-19 2:46:39 PM  
Thank you for getting your kids vaccinated, Drew. My family (sisters, brother, their kids, yada yada) have been in different versions of the service industry for more than 3 decades. Everyone that tries to protect others is more than expected.
 
2021-05-19 2:48:28 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-05-19 2:50:42 PM  
48 States!
1 Satellite! (Moon)
Uphill! Both ways! 16' snow!
 
2021-05-19 2:51:19 PM  
Storm is going to be voting? I remember when he was born. And it seems like just a couple years ago.

media2.giphy.comView Full Size
 
2021-05-19 2:56:48 PM  
Please tell me Storm's middle name is Trooper.
 
2021-05-19 2:58:51 PM  
I couldn't ever find oh fark anywhere, so I assumed that it went away long ago.  Turns out it's just bewilderingly hard to find.  There doesn't seem to be a direct link to it anywhere (totalfark and barefark are everywhere but oh fark is no where to be found), you just seemingly have to know that it's fark.com/ohfark.  Which seems like very poor design to me.

But regardless, I'll see about snagging it finally before even that impossible to find link disappears forever.
 
2021-05-19 3:03:24 PM  

xanadian: Speaking of which, want to feel old?  He's going to be able to vote in the next election.

JFC, so will mine.  O.o

/TEAM OLD


Jeez, and I though I felt old when my son turned 40 back in August, 2020 :/

TEAM ANCIENT!
 
2021-05-19 3:07:00 PM  
They grow up so fast...


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-05-19 3:07:20 PM  

DisseminationMonkey: OtherLittleGuy: I was hoping Oystermanwould make the NotNewsletter. It was a great twist on a classic.

I have no idea what you're talking about, but if it was from Sunday through today, it might be in next week's.


Oh, sorry. I meant I was hoping and glad that he made it with the Kristen Bell Original Yoga Picture, up above.
 
2021-05-19 3:07:55 PM  

Walker: Storm is going to be voting? I remember when he was born. And it seems like just a couple years ago.

[media2.giphy.com image 245x220] [View Full Size image _x_]


Drew should show him his birthday thread on his 18th birthday

Storm Alexander Curtis born at 8:45am. Five pounds, eight ounces -- only two hours of labor
 
2021-05-19 3:10:08 PM  

jake3988: I couldn't ever find oh fark anywhere, so I assumed that it went away long ago.  Turns out it's just bewilderingly hard to find.  There doesn't seem to be a direct link to it anywhere (totalfark and barefark are everywhere but oh fark is no where to be found), you just seemingly have to know that it's fark.com/ohfark.  Which seems like very poor design to me.

But regardless, I'll see about snagging it finally before even that impossible to find link disappears forever.


If you're on the full site, it's in the right side column. If you're on the mobile site, click menu and scroll down under memberships.
 
2021-05-19 3:10:31 PM  

OtherLittleGuy: I was hoping Oystermanwould make the NotNewsletter. It was a great twist on a classic.


My one regret was not having the capability (read: photoshop) of adding the Rock's suit.


/And Hillbilly Jim set up the ball; I just spiked it.
 
2021-05-19 3:11:26 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-05-19 3:17:21 PM  

Oysterman: OtherLittleGuy: I was hoping Oystermanwould make the NotNewsletter. It was a great twist on a classic.

My one regret was not having the capability (read: photoshop) of adding the Rock's suit.


/And Hillbilly Jim set up the ball; I just spiked it.


It was a beautiful.
 
2021-05-19 3:24:58 PM  

Bathia_Mapes: xanadian: Speaking of which, want to feel old?  He's going to be able to vote in the next election.

JFC, so will mine.  O.o

/TEAM OLD

Jeez, and I though I felt old when my son turned 40 back in August, 2020 :/

TEAM ANCIENT!


Great Granddaughter just turned 7.
 
2021-05-19 3:28:28 PM  

169th Cousin: Bathia_Mapes: xanadian: Speaking of which, want to feel old?  He's going to be able to vote in the next election.

JFC, so will mine.  O.o

/TEAM OLD

Jeez, and I though I felt old when my son turned 40 back in August, 2020 :/

TEAM ANCIENT!

Great Granddaughter just turned 7.


 
2021-05-19 3:38:25 PM  
Well, I'm going to hold of on the alien story until Halloween, so someone remind me in a few months.
I haven't posted it in a while.
 
2021-05-19 3:45:53 PM  

169th Cousin: Bathia_Mapes: xanadian: Speaking of which, want to feel old?  He's going to be able to vote in the next election.

JFC, so will mine.  O.o

/TEAM OLD

Jeez, and I though I felt old when my son turned 40 back in August, 2020 :/

TEAM ANCIENT!

Great Granddaughter just turned 7.


You win.
 
2021-05-19 3:51:28 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-05-19 4:28:46 PM  

eyeq360: [Fark user image 850x447]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-05-19 4:42:15 PM  

Pharmdawg: Please tell me Storm's middle name is Trooper.


Fark user imageView Full Size

It's Peak.
 
2021-05-19 4:45:42 PM  
Periodic reminder anybody in the US is eligible to get their shot in Oklahoma.  Just go sign up at https://vaccinate.oklahoma.gov/
 
2021-05-19 4:46:29 PM  
I guess thanks to whoever gave me my badge.

And curse you drew. You can only got my tf money because your ads kept putting a video of your face on the screen when I was pretending to be working.
 
2021-05-19 4:47:41 PM  

169th Cousin: Bathia_Mapes: xanadian: Speaking of which, want to feel old?  He's going to be able to vote in the next election.

JFC, so will mine.  O.o

/TEAM OLD

Jeez, and I though I felt old when my son turned 40 back in August, 2020 :/

TEAM ANCIENT!

Great Granddaughter just turned 7.


I do like coming to fark to feel young at only 37
 
2021-05-19 4:49:53 PM  

Gubbo: 169th Cousin: Bathia_Mapes: xanadian: Speaking of which, want to feel old?  He's going to be able to vote in the next election.

JFC, so will mine.  O.o

/TEAM OLD

Jeez, and I though I felt old when my son turned 40 back in August, 2020 :/

TEAM ANCIENT!

Great Granddaughter just turned 7.

I do like coming to fark to feel young at only 37


So Fark IS your personal erotic site.
 
2021-05-19 5:19:57 PM  
I just want to tell everyone that is squicked out by needles, it is more than worth the momentary discomfort.

Such a load off. I know I'm kinda preaching to the choir here, and some of you may dislike me for some reason or another. This isn't about whether you like or dislike me. It's about people you don't even know. Are you going to put them in danger because of some mild discomfort? Are they so disposable that foggy glasses are worth their lives? Really?
 
2021-05-19 5:20:55 PM  
BUFFALO, JULY 9!

From their page it seems that space is still available.

Get your shots.
Wash your mask.
 
2021-05-19 5:28:05 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-05-19 5:48:35 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-05-19 6:40:07 PM  

Bathia_Mapes: xanadian: Speaking of which, want to feel old?  He's going to be able to vote in the next election.

JFC, so will mine.  O.o

/TEAM OLD

Jeez, and I though I felt old when my son turned 40 back in August, 2020 :/

TEAM ANCIENT!


I thought I felt old when my oldest granddaughter got married in December of 2019.
 
2021-05-19 7:40:22 PM  

Gubbo: 169th Cousin: Bathia_Mapes: xanadian: Speaking of which, want to feel old?  He's going to be able to vote in the next election.

JFC, so will mine.  O.o

/TEAM OLD

Jeez, and I though I felt old when my son turned 40 back in August, 2020 :/

TEAM ANCIENT!

Great Granddaughter just turned 7.

I do like coming to fark to feel young at only 37


Timing is everything.
Still feel like 18, who's that OLD fark in the mirror?
 
2021-05-19 7:49:55 PM  

LineNoise: Wait, the pandemic is almost over?

Wouldn't know by what gets greened.


"but the quarantine is looking like it's all but over in the U.S "

reading is fundamental
 
2021-05-19 9:09:49 PM  
With three kids to put through college I knew it wasn't Drew that was retiring.
 
2021-05-19 9:46:49 PM  

nicoffeine: I just want to tell everyone that is squicked out by needles, it is more than worth the momentary discomfort.

Such a load off. I know I'm kinda preaching to the choir here, and some of you may dislike me for some reason or another. This isn't about whether you like or dislike me. It's about people you don't even know. Are you going to put them in danger because of some mild discomfort? Are they so disposable that foggy glasses are worth their lives? Really?


I had #1 last Sunday. Pfizer. I had been mildly concerned because my bff had complained of feeling a terrible lurgy the day after his first shot. And I'd asked on Fark, and some Farkers had said they felt like they'd had a terrible hangover the next day.

Worst I felt was a bit of a sore arm the next day, and I used the special trick of avoiding any kind of needle phobia I've used since I was a child. I looked away.

Not sure if there's any scientific basis behind why some suffer a terrible lurgy from the jab or not. I haven't so far and I hope that continues for jab #2.
 
2021-05-19 9:51:19 PM  
People born after September 11th voted in the last election
 
2021-05-19 10:09:11 PM  

uncleacid: With three kids to put through college I knew it wasn't Drew that was retiring.


Oh, kids kids will go to college?

/I kid.  About kids.

My daughter is just 3 months older than Storm.  She's president of her 430-some 2021 class.  Their graduation is in the HS football stadium on Friday.  It's forecast for T-storms that day.

Thanks, Storm.
 
2021-05-19 10:10:32 PM  
*his kids, college, etc.

/would buy comment editing rights from Drew.
 
2021-05-19 10:11:16 PM  

Sim Tree: People born after September 11th voted in the last election


That is deep.

I'll go wash my boots now.
 
2021-05-19 10:14:46 PM  

SansNeural: Sim Tree: People born after September 11th voted in the last election

That is deep.

I'll go wash my boots now.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-05-19 10:34:26 PM  

jim32rr: SansNeural: Sim Tree: People born after September 11th voted in the last election

That is deep.

I'll go wash my boots now.

[Fark user image 425x612]


See, that's why I put boots on my hands.  Keeps Rick Astley away.
 
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