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(Alaska Dispatch News)   Having solved all problems in America, the feds are suing a garbage company over a $350 neon palm tree full of dead pigeons   ( adn.com) divider line
    More: Facepalm, intrinsic artistic quality, Hotel, Federal government of the United States, new neighborhood magazine, marshals service employee, additional legal filings, United States Marshals Service, Marshal  
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5236 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Mar 2018 at 3:50 PM (19 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



50 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2018-03-08 03:19:03 PM  
Free picture:

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-03-08 03:37:42 PM  
You are aware, Subby, that the federal government has more than 3 employees, right?
 
2018-03-08 03:53:52 PM  

slackananda: Free picture:

[img.fark.net image 850x494]


I don't get that. It doesn't look very tropical to me.
/bbbuurrrrrrrrrrrrr
 
2018-03-08 03:56:16 PM  
Who the hell plants a fake palm tree in Alaska?  That's like running the Iditarod from Key West to Philly using gator boats.
 
2018-03-08 03:56:25 PM  
"But then it turned into a big, threatening federal overreach."


Oh brrrrrrrother
 
2018-03-08 03:58:06 PM  

phalamir: You are aware, Subby, that the federal government has more than 3 employees, right?


No, subby is right - the government shouldn't do anything until it has done everything. Also, it shouldn't do anything. Got it?
 
2018-03-08 03:58:12 PM  

phalamir: You are aware, Subby, that the federal government has more than 3 employees, right?


For now...
 
2018-03-08 04:02:11 PM  
It's worth more than $350, big time.

My reply would be:

a.1stdibscdn.comView Full Size
a.1stdibscdn.comView Full Size
 
2018-03-08 04:02:49 PM  

rkiller1: Who the hell plants a fake palm tree in Alaska?  That's like running the Iditarod from Key West to Philly using gator boats.


Great.  Now I want to try that.
 
2018-03-08 04:03:16 PM  

ChipNASA: slackananda: Free picture:

[img.fark.net image 850x494]

I don't get that. It doesn't look very tropical to me.
/bbbuurrrrrrrrrrrrr


At least it was a free picture. I mean, you didn't have to buy it for that chilling experience.

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-03-08 04:04:58 PM  

ChipNASA: slackananda: Free picture:

[img.fark.net image 850x494]

I don't get that. It doesn't look very tropical to me.
/bbbuurrrrrrrrrrrrr


It actually must have been fairly warm when that picture was taken.  Certainly over 25°F.

No frost on the power lines...
 
2018-03-08 04:05:48 PM  
Wait until they find out about the hovercraft
 
2018-03-08 04:07:50 PM  

phalamir: You are aware, Subby, that the federal government has more than 3 employees, right?


I'm glad some of those employees found the time to pursue this vital issue. In a time when we're slashing budgets for useless programs like the EPA, Education, Health, Energy, and NASA, it's good to see that the savings can go towards what's truly important for this great nation!
 
2018-03-08 04:08:12 PM  

slackananda: Free picture pidgins:

[img.fark.net image 850x494]


/ftfy
 
2018-03-08 04:10:01 PM  
So if you sell a bag of meth they can take your neon palm tree?  I thought this was America!
 
2018-03-08 04:10:03 PM  
That looks like the kind of fleabag flophouse you don't do any sleeping in and all the lovemaking you do you would want to do standing up.

I'm guessing their hourly rates are reasonable though.
 
2018-03-08 04:11:48 PM  

Skyd1v: No frost on the power lines...


When the weather's hot and sticky
That's no time for dunkin' dickey.
But when the frost is on the pumpkin
That's the time for dickey dunkin'.
 
2018-03-08 04:13:21 PM  
""Maybe the value is the iconic value - I don't know. But you can't attach a dollar value to that," he said."

Sure you can. If you put it up for auction, I bet it goes for way more than tree fiddy.
 
2018-03-08 04:16:54 PM  
"the federal government ... claimed the property last year when its owner was sentenced to prison for selling a bag of meth."

Am I the only one who has a problem with this?
 
2018-03-08 04:23:25 PM  
According to another article, the govt. was/is hoping to auction off the property and the neon palm tree.

https://www.adn.com/alaska-news/ancho​r​age/2017/11/23/spenards-paradise-inn-a​nd-its-famous-sign-headed-for-auction/​

Having watched a lot of government auctions, I know it's a toss-up if the thing would ever sell at all. The bigger, dirtier, and less convenient it is to move, the fewer people are willing to bid on it. And half the time the guy who wins the bid never shows up with a trailer big enough to move it.
 
2018-03-08 04:24:52 PM  

Billy Bathsalt: So if you sell a bag of meth they can take your neon palm tree?  I thought this was America!


Asset forfeiture.

They just had to show that the motel was part of the criminal enterprise of selling drugs, like if the owner actually conducted the sale on the premises or they could show the owner was using the proceeds from the drug sales to pay the operating costs of the motel.

It's a shiatty deal, and the Feds way overuse it, but courts have upheld it for decades.
 
2018-03-08 04:29:09 PM  
"Take care of it," he said.

"It's watered," Wilson's attorney said. "Cared for."


THAT made RTFA worth it.
 
2018-03-08 04:35:01 PM  

rkiller1: Who the hell plants a fake palm tree in Alaska?  That's like running the Iditarod from Key West to Philly using gator boats.


As an advertising tool, duh. I'm guessing the bar was kept a full 68°F, even in winter.
 
2018-03-08 04:35:12 PM  

RedT: "the federal government ... claimed the property last year when its owner was sentenced to prison for selling a bag of meth."

Am I the only one who has a problem with this?


Well he should not have sold the  meth at the  hotel he owned, by doing so he showed that the property was part of his drug operation making it a "ill-gotten gain."  This is way different than ol Deputy Billy Bob Seizing Grandmas 10K during a traffic stop cause people smuggle drugs on this here highway.  This is how RICO  was intended to work
 
2018-03-08 04:37:49 PM  

RedT: "the federal government ... claimed the property last year when its owner was sentenced to prison for selling a bag of meth."

Am I the only one who has a problem with this?


Yeah,  the Fed is now stuck with an old rundown building that's best renovated with a flamethrower and a bulldozer.
 
2018-03-08 04:40:52 PM  
♫  ... and dead pigeons in a neon palm tree! ♫
 
2018-03-08 04:42:09 PM  

AugieDoggyDaddy: RedT: "the federal government ... claimed the property last year when its owner was sentenced to prison for selling a bag of meth."

Am I the only one who has a problem with this?

Yeah,  the Fed is now stuck with an old rundown building that's best renovated with a flamethrower and a bulldozer.


So you're in favor of debris to nowhere.
 
2018-03-08 04:46:26 PM  

cretinbob: Wait until they find out about the hovercraft


Is it full of eels?
 
2018-03-08 04:54:42 PM  

Azlefty: Well he should not have sold the  meth at the  hotel he owned, by doing so he showed that the property was part of his drug operation making it a "ill-gotten gain."  This is way different than ol Deputy Billy Bob Seizing Grandmas 10K during a traffic stop cause people smuggle drugs on this here highway.  This is how RICO  was intended to work


I'll gotten gain, or something used in the commission of a crime?
The meth couldn't be too good, though- that tree doesn't sound like the cleanest birdhouse on the street.
 
2018-03-08 05:14:05 PM  

RedT: "the federal government ... claimed the property last year when its owner was sentenced to prison for selling a bag of meth."

Am I the only one who has a problem with this?


And there's the concern over the trash they wanted hauled away. Once they found out it was worth something to somebody, somebody else gets a hard on thinking they could pocket the cash for it.

Remember, Obama dialed back these law and the Head Cheeto brought them right back.
 
2018-03-08 05:22:42 PM  

Bslim: "But then it turned into a big, threatening federal overreach."


Oh brrrrrrrother


No, it's accurate.

They stole the entire motel.  THAT is the real crime here.
 
2018-03-08 05:24:36 PM  

Azlefty: RedT: "the federal government ... claimed the property last year when its owner was sentenced to prison for selling a bag of meth."

Am I the only one who has a problem with this?

Well he should not have sold the  meth at the  hotel he owned, by doing so he showed that the property was part of his drug operation making it a "ill-gotten gain."  This is way different than ol Deputy Billy Bob Seizing Grandmas 10K during a traffic stop cause people smuggle drugs on this here highway.  This is how RICO  was intended to work


It's exactly the same thing as stealing grandma's $10k during a traffic stop - legalized theft.
 
2018-03-08 05:28:27 PM  

Silverstaff: Billy Bathsalt: So if you sell a bag of meth they can take your neon palm tree?  I thought this was America!

Asset forfeiture.

They just had to show that the motel was part of the criminal enterprise of selling drugs, like if the owner actually conducted the sale on the premises or they could show the owner was using the proceeds from the drug sales to pay the operating costs of the motel.

It's a shiatty deal, and the Feds way overuse it, but courts have upheld it for decades.


OR, perhaps there was a fine for selling a bag of meth, for which the owner is unable to pay?
 
2018-03-08 05:29:20 PM  

DarkVader: Azlefty: RedT: "the federal government ... claimed the property last year when its owner was sentenced to prison for selling a bag of meth."

Am I the only one who has a problem with this?

Well he should not have sold the  meth at the  hotel he owned, by doing so he showed that the property was part of his drug operation making it a "ill-gotten gain."  This is way different than ol Deputy Billy Bob Seizing Grandmas 10K during a traffic stop cause people smuggle drugs on this here highway.  This is how RICO  was intended to work

It's exactly the same thing as stealing grandma's $10k during a traffic stop - legalized theft.


No, in this case, it's not.
 
2018-03-08 05:35:29 PM  
I wouldn't call this a waste of government money like some are saying (in other places I've seen this linked).

Government lawyers get paid whether they are in court or not.  Judges, court personnel, court premises, etc., are fixed cost:  They cost the same regardless what case is being tried, whether a case is being tried at all.

Also, new government attorneys having the misfortune of being posted in Alaska need to cut their teeth on cases of lesser importance.
 
2018-03-08 05:40:15 PM  
I'm thinking that the palm tree is a bit of a "landmark" and, without it, the motel might be a hard sell. While the motel has a troubling history, it's not too late to make it into a better establishment, contributing to the community and the street's endearment.

That being said, that lady can kiss future federal contracts goodbye.
 
2018-03-08 05:40:18 PM  

DarkVader: Bslim: "But then it turned into a big, threatening federal overreach."


Oh brrrrrrrother

No, it's accurate.

They stole the entire motel.  THAT is the real crime here.


Yeah, I hear ya. But it still wasn't hers to keep. Unless she 's meaning to keep it for him until he gets out of lock-up.
 
2018-03-08 05:59:17 PM  

Billy Bathsalt: So if you sell a bag of meth they can take your neon palm tree?  I thought this was America!


Asset forfeiture is as American as they get
 
2018-03-08 06:08:19 PM  
Why $500 will buy an impoverished DEA agent a Glock 17. Won' t you think of those poor unfortunates?


/ The sign probably can be restored
// But the cost would outstrip any profit
 
2018-03-08 06:14:53 PM  

AllYourFarkIsUs: I'm thinking that the palm tree is a bit of a "landmark" and, without it, the motel might be a hard sell. While the motel has a troubling history, it's not too late to make it into a better establishment, contributing to the community and the street's endearment.

That being said, that lady can kiss future federal contracts goodbye.


Why? Even the feds say that one of their own minions authorized it's removal during a walkthrough on what the work would be. The company did nothing wrong. Now they want it back because they now realize that it has some value above what amounts to it's basic scrap value.
 
2018-03-08 06:17:01 PM  

AllYourFarkIsUs: I'm thinking that the palm tree is a bit of a "landmark" and, without it, the motel might be a hard sell. While the motel has a troubling history, it's not too late to make it into a better establishment, contributing to the community and the street's endearment.

That being said, that lady can kiss future federal contracts goodbye.


I don't know but I doubt an Anchorage trash company made that much from federal contracts if they're willing to go against the Federal government in court, It might also be a political move by the owner.
 
2018-03-08 06:28:30 PM  

ChipNASA: slackananda: Free picture:

[img.fark.net image 850x494]

I don't get that. It doesn't look very tropical to me.
/bbbuurrrrrrrrrrrrr


Every Tiki inn should at least have pink flamingos.
 
2018-03-08 07:22:26 PM  
I'm NAL but I thought the government was estopped from penalizing you for doing what it ordered.
 
2018-03-08 08:00:23 PM  

SwiftFox: I'm NAL but I thought the government was estopped from penalizing you for doing what it ordered.


If you read TFA, the government's attorneys is claiming the Deputy US Marshall that ordered the disposal of the sign had no legal authority to do so.

. . .if the Judge rules he did, then she owns the sign and the Federal case falls apart.
 
2018-03-08 09:03:07 PM  
She was hired to clean up a property, instead she stole a property fixture.  Theft is theft, just arrest her.
 
2018-03-08 09:11:21 PM  

Sean VasDeferens: She was hired to clean up a property, instead she stole a property fixture.  Theft is theft, just arrest her.


She was told to get rid of the sign and kept it. Maybe because it looked cool, maybe because it would cost her money to take it to the dump and she'd rather take it home and break it into pieces that could be scrapped.

Sure, it would be *nice* to give it back when the govt realized their mistake... But as that moon rocks bag lawsuit showed, the govt can't give/sell you something and then just take it back when they realize they farked up.
 
2018-03-08 09:34:58 PM  
A neon tree full of dead pigeons?

We are either talking about art and heritage or about the 12 Days of Christmas, which is not a matter for the Feds and thus quite unlikely.

I am plopping for American art and heritage. Sounds a bit too weird for Canada. Canadians are seldom that original. We name hotels after British and American hotels (Trump hotels not included.)
 
2018-03-08 09:36:11 PM  
 ... and a dead partridge in a neon tree.

Now I am covering the arts and religion!
 
2018-03-08 11:06:43 PM  

Silverstaff: Billy Bathsalt: So if you sell a bag of meth they can take your neon palm tree?  I thought this was America!

Asset forfeiture.

They just had to show that the motel was part of the criminal enterprise of selling drugs, like if the owner actually conducted the sale on the premises or they could show the owner was using the proceeds from the drug sales to pay the operating costs of the motel.

It's a shiatty deal, and the Feds way overuse it, but courts have upheld it for decades.


Hey, at least there was a conviction involved with this seizure.
 
2018-03-09 12:40:53 AM  
Dead Pigeons?

Impropriety?

Tom Lehrer would like a word.
 
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