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(The Daily Beast)   Nothing like a Thursday night with "more than words" gently playing in the background while you break into your emergency crate of grapefruit because THEY GET ME, HELEN   ( thedailybeast.com) divider line
    More: Followup  
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4528 clicks; posted to Politics » on 08 Mar 2018 at 3:50 PM (18 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2018-03-08 12:42:12 PM  
poor Devin, alone with only the love of a warm grapefruit to get him through these dark times...
 
2018-03-08 12:44:16 PM  
The chafing must be unreal if he is stress-farking citrus like that.
 
2018-03-08 01:40:04 PM  

Anastacya: The chafing must be unreal if he is stress-farking citrus like that.


I'm sure you start to build up calluses after the 15th one.
 
2018-03-08 01:46:27 PM  

Tsukue: Anastacya: The chafing must be unreal if he is stress-farking citrus like that.

I'm sure you start to build up calluses after the 15th one.


or the acid eats away at your nerve endings....
 
2018-03-08 02:01:37 PM  
We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit

screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.comView Full Size
 
2018-03-08 02:07:19 PM  

scottydoesntknow: We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit

[screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.com image 500x579]


you would think they would by now, since we've been running this gag into the ground for over a month now

/i have never been so prouder of you cheeky bastards
 
2018-03-08 03:58:36 PM  

scottydoesntknow: We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit

[screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.com image 500x579]


But it REALLY works well when paired with this knowledge.

SOOOOoOOOO NSFW.  Seriously.  Just don't around work or children.

/it reaches its apex around 2:30 minutes in.  You won't regret the high comedy of it.

Grapefruit Technique
Youtube nLTgWdXrx3U
 
2018-03-08 03:59:05 PM  

somedude210: scottydoesntknow: We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit

[screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.com image 500x579]

you would think they would by now, since we've been running this gag into the ground for over a month now

/i have never been so prouder of you cheeky bastards


I honestly didn't know, but then again I new eventually one of you farkers would get around to explaining it. In the mean time it was humorous to come up with reasons in my head as to why he loved his grapefruit so very warm.
 
2018-03-08 03:59:28 PM  
Go ahead Devin.  You know she wants it.

readthespirit.wpengine.netdna-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2018-03-08 04:00:10 PM  
Can we please stop with this grapefruit now, please? We've mashed it to death, and it's no longer appealing.
 
2018-03-08 04:01:16 PM  

somedude210: scottydoesntknow: We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit

[screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.com image 500x579]

you would think they would by now, since we've been running this gag into the ground for over a month now

/i have never been so prouder of you cheeky bastards


Well that and you can literally google "nunes grapefruit" and get the scoop from the first 3 links available. Some folks are just farkin' LAAAAAAAZZZZZYYY
 
2018-03-08 04:01:32 PM  

WayneKerr: Can we please stop with this grapefruit now, please? We've mashed it to death, and it's no longer appealing.


Its good for you.  Just sprinkle a little sugar on it.
 
2018-03-08 04:01:50 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size

 Nunes' Passion, is a lotta fruit mashin'
 
2018-03-08 04:02:28 PM  
 Too bad when it comes to ethics, nothing about this administration suggest anything is going to happen to him.  Back when things were normal he would've had his ass nailed to the wall
 
2018-03-08 04:03:06 PM  
Someone needs to add "Nunes" to urban dictionary to be similar to "Santorum", but with slightly different ingredients.
 
2018-03-08 04:03:54 PM  
Better love story than Twilight
 
2018-03-08 04:04:14 PM  

weddingsinger: scottydoesntknow: We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit

[screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.com image 500x579]

But it REALLY works well when paired with this knowledge.

SOOOOoOOOO NSFW.  Seriously.  Just don't around work or children.

/it reaches its apex around 2:30 minutes in.  You won't regret the high comedy of it.

[Youtube nLTgWdXrx3U image 480x360][Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/nLTgWdXr​x3U]


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-03-08 04:06:33 PM  
Unrelatedly, does anyone know if rohypnol is soluble in citric acid?
 
2018-03-08 04:09:47 PM  

BlazeTrailer: Unrelatedly, does anyone know if rohypnol is soluble in citric acid?


Unless he eats the grape fruit after, not enough of the drug would be absorbed via his penis to effect him.

Citric acid does not function like DMSO.
 
DGS [TotalFark]
2018-03-08 04:10:14 PM  
Cuz Iiiiiiiii'd Aaaaallreeeeeeeeeadddyyyyyyyyy BLOWWWWWWW
 
2018-03-08 04:11:01 PM  

BlazeTrailer: Unrelatedly, does anyone know if rohypnol is soluble in citric acid?


Given that both are solids.  No.
 
2018-03-08 04:11:35 PM  

theflatline: BlazeTrailer: Unrelatedly, does anyone know if rohypnol is soluble in citric acid?

Unless he eats the grape fruit after, not enough of the drug would be absorbed via his penis to effect him.

Citric acid does not function like DMSO.


Excuse me. They don't call him Nune-Straw for nothing. Stop penis projecting and get with the poisoning program.
 
2018-03-08 04:11:42 PM  

weddingsinger: scottydoesntknow: We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit

[screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.com image 500x579]

But it REALLY works well when paired with this knowledge.

SOOOOoOOOO NSFW.  Seriously.  Just don't around work or children.

/it reaches its apex around 2:30 minutes in.  You won't regret the high comedy of it.

[Youtube nLTgWdXrx3U image 480x360][Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/nLTgWdXr​x3U]


Watched the video again, and completely forgot whatever the hell I was going to post.
Farking Hilarious! "...so you are actually losing weight while sucking his dick!" *big smile*
Jesus H Christ, I'm going to show this to the wife as an alternative to her aerobics.

/note: purchase pomellos
 
2018-03-08 04:12:55 PM  

WayneKerr: Can we please stop with this grapefruit now, please? We've mashed it to death, and it's no longer appealing.


Pithy!
 
2018-03-08 04:15:31 PM  

WayneKerr: Can we please stop with this grapefruit now, please? We've mashed it to death, and it's no longer appealing.


Goes along with the sock under his bed!
 
2018-03-08 04:16:14 PM  

theflatline: BlazeTrailer: Unrelatedly, does anyone know if rohypnol is soluble in citric acid?

Unless he eats the grape fruit after, not enough of the drug would be absorbed via his penis to effect him.

Citric acid does not function like DMSO.


I assumed he was drugging the grapefruit so the grapefruit sex wouldn't be just grapefruit sex, but grapefruit rape.
 
2018-03-08 04:16:54 PM  
I'm just dying of laughter here, that's all.
 
2018-03-08 04:17:11 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-03-08 04:17:48 PM  

palelizard: theflatline: BlazeTrailer: Unrelatedly, does anyone know if rohypnol is soluble in citric acid?

Unless he eats the grape fruit after, not enough of the drug would be absorbed via his penis to effect him.

Citric acid does not function like DMSO.

I assumed he was drugging the grapefruit so the grapefruit sex wouldn't be just grapefruit sex, but grapefruit rape.


"Hey baby, you gotta headache from where you were plucked off the vine, let Dr. Devin give you something for that."
 
2018-03-08 04:18:23 PM  

palelizard: theflatline: BlazeTrailer: Unrelatedly, does anyone know if rohypnol is soluble in citric acid?

Unless he eats the grape fruit after, not enough of the drug would be absorbed via his penis to effect him.

Citric acid does not function like DMSO.

I assumed he was drugging the grapefruit so the grapefruit sex wouldn't be just grapefruit sex, but grapefruit rape.


Are you saying that Devin Nunes puts the 'Rape' in Grapefruit?
 
2018-03-08 04:21:05 PM  
Thanks for the earworm, subby.
 
2018-03-08 04:21:06 PM  

scottydoesntknow: We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit


img.fark.netView Full Size


and we thank you for posting it. A little known fact about this photo: Devin Nunes borrowed Obama's time machine and inserted a recent photo of himself into the yearbook just to the left of his younger self. And yes, he still loves those tacky turtlenecks.
 
2018-03-08 04:21:11 PM  

stevecore: Too bad when it comes to ethics, nothing about this administration suggest anything is going to happen to him.  Back when things were normal he would've had his ass nailed to the wall


Things haven't been "normal" since McConnel and Ryan decided to trike to put a spike in the Obama presidency.
 
2018-03-08 04:23:23 PM  
Just want to say that, as much as it looks like Nunes will be spending some time in a cell, and much as we all want to see that, I haven't forgotten about you, Chaffetz. The story still isn't out on you, but it was just as obvious that you were conspiring to undermine an investigation as Nunes.

Your turn is coming too.
 
2018-03-08 04:24:03 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size


---------------

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-03-08 04:25:09 PM  

scottydoesntknow: We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit

[screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.com image 500x579]


This should be on his Wiki page
 
2018-03-08 04:26:05 PM  

weddingsinger: scottydoesntknow: We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit

[screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.com image 500x579]

But it REALLY works well when paired with this knowledge.

SOOOOoOOOO NSFW.  Seriously.  Just don't around work or children.

/it reaches its apex around 2:30 minutes in.  You won't regret the high comedy of it.

[YouTube video: Grapefruit Technique]


Jesus Tapdancing Christ.
 
2018-03-08 04:27:59 PM  
I don't think I'll ever be able to eat grapefruit again.
 
2018-03-08 04:29:48 PM  
Why did I look at his Wiki just now? I am barely holding back from replacing his official picture with that one.
I have those perilous fluttery butterflies warning me no to but those bastages are also whispering, "Do eeeet!)
 
2018-03-08 04:31:01 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-03-08 04:33:09 PM  

The Martian Manhandler: palelizard: theflatline: BlazeTrailer: Unrelatedly, does anyone know if rohypnol is soluble in citric acid?

Unless he eats the grape fruit after, not enough of the drug would be absorbed via his penis to effect him.

Citric acid does not function like DMSO.

I assumed he was drugging the grapefruit so the grapefruit sex wouldn't be just grapefruit sex, but grapefruit rape.

Are you saying that Devin Nunes puts the 'Rape' in Grapefruit?


I'm saying there's a power dynamic present where the grapefruit can never truly give consent even if it's clear the grapefruit wanted it.
 
2018-03-08 04:33:25 PM  

Kixy: I don't think I'll ever be able to eat grapefruit again.


I could never figure out why people ever did in the first place. ew.
 
2018-03-08 04:33:29 PM  
CSB:

I really am going to buy a grapefruit tree this month, plant it and name it Devin. I don't even like grapefruit, but it will help block out the view of the neighbor's house year-round.

/end CSB
 
2018-03-08 04:35:31 PM  
I was going to ask, but I watched the video.
Now I get it. If she used a large cucumber, maybe she wouldn't even need to get her mouth on it. (They have that seedy middle that might be similar. BIG cucumber.)
 
2018-03-08 04:37:29 PM  

That Guy What Stole the Bacon: weddingsinger: scottydoesntknow: We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit

[screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.com image 500x579]

But it REALLY works well when paired with this knowledge.

SOOOOoOOOO NSFW.  Seriously.  Just don't around work or children.

/it reaches its apex around 2:30 minutes in.  You won't regret the high comedy of it.

[YouTube video: Grapefruit Technique]

Jesus Tapdancing Christ.


Yea, I'm never gonna un-hear those noises...
 
2018-03-08 04:39:54 PM  

stevecore: Too bad when it comes to ethics, nothing about this administration suggest anything is going to happen to him.  Back when things were normal he would've had his ass nailed to the wall


This is all about ethics in grapefruit courting.
 
2018-03-08 04:39:55 PM  
Is Nunes even aware of the meme in his honor? If not, someone please notify him immediately.
 
2018-03-08 04:41:43 PM  

Kixy: I don't think I'll ever be able to eat grapefruit again.


Damn, and I got two of em in my fridge.
 
2018-03-08 04:42:53 PM  
Those farking whores, right out there on the street where children can see:
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-03-08 04:43:35 PM  

scottydoesntknow: We'll just get this out of the way right now since there's still apparently some farkers that have never heard of Nunes' lust for the grapefruit

[screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.com image 500x579]


Thank you sir!
 
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