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(TeamRock)   Metallica reportedly releasing their own brand of American whiskey. No word if it will be served in a Jar-O   ( teamrock.com) divider line
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612 clicks; posted to Business » on 05 Mar 2018 at 9:50 AM (32 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



65 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2018-03-05 08:55:43 AM  
I'm picturing bar rag squeezings with a smoky hint of diesel oil, sold in a used Axe Body Spray can.
 
2018-03-05 09:54:55 AM  
I can't remember anything
Can't tell if this is true or dream
Deep down inside I feel Jim Beam
This terrible nausea stops me.

Now that the bar is through with me,
I'm throwing up, I cannot see
Methanol went and blinded me
Nothing is real but barf now.

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh, please, God, kill me...
 
2018-03-05 09:54:59 AM  
Will it be called Sandman? St. Anger? Unforgiven?
 
2018-03-05 09:55:23 AM  
Probably should've gone with "Deep down inside? My fake Jim Beam"
 
2018-03-05 09:58:02 AM  

kdawg7736: Will it be called Sandman? St. Anger? Unforgiven?


"...And Rotgut For All", perhaps. Or "Stone Cold Tax Dodge".
 
2018-03-05 09:58:58 AM  
"American Whiskey".
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-03-05 10:06:22 AM  
Drinkers will instantly pine for their older whisky types, insisting aged Metallica is best Metallica
 
2018-03-05 10:07:00 AM  
'creeping death'

soon to be followed by 'ride the white lightning' moonshine
 
2018-03-05 10:08:58 AM  
Harvester of Sorrow would be the best, most accurate name
 
2018-03-05 10:12:27 AM  
Isn't Master of Puppets about alcoholism?  Because I guess that makes sense with them returning to their more thrashy sound on Death Magnetic and Hard Wired if the sauce has reintroduced itself.
 
2018-03-05 10:14:54 AM  
Question: which Metallica albums are currently considered good?
 
2018-03-05 10:16:35 AM  

Branniganslaw: Drinkers will instantly pine for their older whisky types, insisting aged Metallica is best Metallica


Which will lead to the inevitable argument of superiority: Metallica Whisky vs Megadeth Bourbon.
 
2018-03-05 10:24:23 AM  
At least Maynard's wine isnt sold under the tool branding.

I hope the Metallica stuff is cinnamon flavored. Fight Fire with Fireball!
 
2018-03-05 10:25:41 AM  

batlock666: Question: which Metallica albums are currently considered good?


For me, anything before the Black album.  Black album and forward is all crap IMHO.

Black album might be good, but by the time I was 10, everyone I knew played it out and everyone I knew that played guitar played Enter Sandman way too dammnnn muuucccchhhh.
 
2018-03-05 10:29:57 AM  

FormlessOne: I can't remember anything
Can't tell if this is true or dream
Deep down inside I feel Jim Beam
This terrible nausea stops me.

Now that the bar is through with me,
I'm throwing up, I cannot see
Methanol went and blinded me
Nothing is real but barf now.

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh, please, God, kill me...


I wanted to try my hand at doing a similar thing with a different song....but I'm just not gonna top that. Well done. Sadly, I have but one 'funny' to give.
 
2018-03-05 10:30:21 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-03-05 10:31:00 AM  
factoryconnection [

Isn't Master of Puppets about alcoholism? Because I guess that makes sense with them returning to their more thrashy sound on Death Magnetic and Hard Wired if the sauce has reintroduced itself.

I think they "went back to their roots" when their audience went from jean jackets and leather to Chrysler Town and Country.

And hearing their music in grocery stores
 
2018-03-05 10:31:05 AM  

jso2897: "American Whiskey".
[img.fark.net image 849x565]


Whiskey made in America which can't be called bourbon.

Why is that a problem?
 
2018-03-05 10:35:16 AM  
I thought they quit drinking.
/once owned an "Alcoholica" t-shirt.
 
2018-03-05 10:39:42 AM  
I'm a bourbon guy, I'll just say the vast majority of these new comers in whiskey are trash.  Hot, never smooth flavor.  They lack something that the old distilleries have.

Jefferson is about the only newby that comes to mind that's good, and it's blended bourbon, so purist hate it.

/my two cents.
//opinions may vary.
 
2018-03-05 10:40:08 AM  
I'll bet Lars sues everyone who gets a free sample.
 
2018-03-05 10:45:01 AM  
I wonder if Metallica would consider going the same route as The Offspring and just selling off their entire catalog as a golden parachute into retirement.

Granted, Metallica has probably made more in royalties alone than The Offspring made over their whole careers, but still.
 
2018-03-05 10:46:27 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-03-05 11:02:02 AM  
Its already been don by a much better act.

whiskys.co.ukView Full Size
 
2018-03-05 11:04:12 AM  
3.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size
 
2018-03-05 11:04:27 AM  

FormlessOne: I can't remember anything
Can't tell if this is true or dream
Deep down inside I feel Jim Beam
This terrible nausea stops me.

Now that the bar is through with me,
I'm throwing up, I cannot see
Methanol went and blinded me
Nothing is real but barf now.

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh, please, God, kill me...


Bravo sir.
 
2018-03-05 11:09:18 AM  
Just don't mix it with anything...

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-03-05 11:18:17 AM  
I guess it depends where they source it from. If they get it from one the better large distilleries and don't do anything stupid to it, it will probably be a decent whiskey. It probably won't be worth the price tag after they add on all the standard mark ups, but if someone poured me a glass I would probably have no problem drinking it.
 
2018-03-05 11:28:32 AM  

lordargent: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 236x320]


That's a good beer for making B&Ts with Guinness.

It's a good beer, period, but it's also good for making B&Ts.
 
2018-03-05 11:33:09 AM  
If served in a jar it would be an Irish import
 
2018-03-05 11:35:53 AM  

jaytkay: jso2897: "American Whiskey".
[img.fark.net image 849x565]

Whiskey made in America which can't be called bourbon.

Why is that a problem?


I suppose something has to make Canadian Whiskey look good.
 
2018-03-05 11:43:42 AM  

Rev.K: I wonder if Metallica would consider going the same route as The Offspring and just selling off their entire catalog as a golden parachute into retirement.

Granted, Metallica has probably made more in royalties alone than The Offspring made over their whole careers, but still.


They don't need to.  They have all the money they'll ever need already because they've done a good job not getting screwed by labels and managers.  The own the rights to all their music, they run their own label, and they have their own recording studio.  They basically control the entire production and distribution chain, and make full royalties on everything, not just the piddly cut that artists generally make after the label bends them over.
 
2018-03-05 11:46:32 AM  

kdawg7736: Will it be called Sandman? St. Anger? Unforgiven?


The Thing That Should Not Be
 
2018-03-05 11:52:58 AM  
They will eventually have half of their whiskey pirated and given away for free by Napster Whiskey.
 
2018-03-05 11:54:25 AM  

Clash City Farker: Its already been don by a much better act.

[whiskys.co.uk image 850x850]


I wonder if Shane goes for a swim in a pool of his own whiskey every day?
 
2018-03-05 12:24:53 PM  

The Googles Do Nothing: kdawg7736: Will it be called Sandman? St. Anger? Unforgiven?

The Thing That Should Not Be


Anesthesia.
 
2018-03-05 01:11:31 PM  

lordargent: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 236x320]


Trooper is all you need.
 
2018-03-05 01:21:08 PM  

Clash City Farker: Its already been don by a much better act.

[whiskys.co.uk image 850x850]


It sure has.

assets.blabbermouth.net.s3.amazonaws.comView Full Size
 
2018-03-05 01:24:49 PM  
I don't get buying products with a random name slapped on them. Metallica booze is as appealing as "Ferrari" wrist watches or Jeep brand bicycles.

People are weird. Weird morons.
 
2018-03-05 01:30:26 PM  

Straight Outta Wells Branch: I'll bet Lars sues everyone who gets a free sample.


WRONG! He is planning on suing alcohol consumers for infringement on his intellectual property. Don't even think about taking a shot of Jim Beam or Jack Daniels or you will be subject to legal action, including, but not limited to lawsuit, wage garnishments, and asset seizure.
 
2018-03-05 01:36:28 PM  

jso2897: "American Whiskey".


Bourbon is true American whiskey. A case can be made for Tennessee Whiskey or rye. When I hear the sobriquet "American Whiskey," I think it's a cheap knock-off of Canadian.

/"American Whiskey" would be enough to make me quit if I still drank.
 
2018-03-05 01:37:30 PM  

jaytkay: I don't get buying products with a random name slapped on them. Metallica booze is as appealing as "Ferrari" wrist watches or Jeep brand bicycles.

People are weird. Weird morons.


Yet apparently Sammy Hagar's tequila is pretty good.  The guy certainly loves tequila enough.
 
2018-03-05 01:53:32 PM  
Hopefully nobody shares a shot with anybody.

Metallica Napster Bad
Youtube fS6udST6lbE
 
2018-03-05 01:55:48 PM  

Adebisi: It sure has.


I've had that.

It's really quite good.
 
2018-03-05 02:00:34 PM  
They're way behind.   It's not a whiskey but made by someone with more talent anyway
https://caduceus.org/

Now, if you want whiskey then there's always this
http://oldcampwhiskey.com/
 
2018-03-05 02:29:11 PM  

factoryconnection: Isn't Master of Puppets about alcoholism?


Unless it is powdered, no. "chop your breakfast on a mirror" ....
 
2018-03-05 03:32:49 PM  

Monster Island: The Googles Do Nothing: kdawg7736: Will it be called Sandman? St. Anger? Unforgiven?

The Thing That Should Not Be

Anesthesia.


...this far in and nobody's gone for the obvious House That Jack Built?
 
2018-03-05 04:38:38 PM  
Two whiskeys sure to knock your socks off:

"Master of Puppets" and "Call of Cthulhu "
 
2018-03-05 04:45:10 PM  

Bimmer Jones: jso2897: "American Whiskey".

Bourbon is true American whiskey. A case can be made for Tennessee Whiskey or rye. When I hear the sobriquet "American Whiskey," I think it's a cheap knock-off of Canadian.

/"American Whiskey" would be enough to make me quit if I still drank.


Someone, somewhere, probably makes a decent "American Whiskey" - but all those I have tasted have been blended nightmares closer to Southern Comfort than to anything decent.
I think of Bourbon and rye as two other, separate things.
 
2018-03-05 04:48:37 PM  
Random Anonymous Blackmail:

And hearing their music in grocery stores

 heard "I wanna be sedated" in the grocery store the other day and felt really, really old.
 
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