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(Outside Online)   If you've had enough of those wussy vacations where all you do is hang out at the pool and drink, try an Arctic survival course, only $4K plus airfare and possible hypothermia   ( outsideonline.com) divider line
    More: Scary, South Pole, Arctic Ocean, North Pole, sea ice, Sarah, Extreme Polar Training, wind, Lin  
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2619 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Mar 2018 at 1:36 AM (19 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



33 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2018-03-02 08:25:43 PM  
All I want to do is go to the Penguins.
 
2018-03-02 09:58:24 PM  
I visit family in Buffalo every Christmas.  That's as close as I want to go spending my money on what TFA is describing.
 
2018-03-02 10:17:37 PM  
Join the military. You might get to do it for free.
 
2018-03-03 01:40:41 AM  
Nah, I'll take my money and go to Vegas, thank you.
 
2018-03-03 01:50:21 AM  
Negative - Constant sub-zero temperatures
Positive - The ice in your drink never melts

I'm going to have to think about this,
 
2018-03-03 01:52:13 AM  

edmo: Join the military.


Nah.
 
2018-03-03 01:53:00 AM  
Tell me more about the pool, and what drinks do they serve?
 
2018-03-03 01:57:52 AM  
The honeymoon that my husband and I wanted to take (but couldn't afford) was to Alaska. Maybe we'll get to it before our 15th anniversary.
 
2018-03-03 01:58:34 AM  
Check this out. On topic, and entertaining! And the pilot might be Ronnie Reagan. Hard to tell.

Arctic Survival: 'Land and Live in the Arctic' 1943 US Army Air Forces Training Film; WWII
Youtube P0r5Bwd9V7A
 
2018-03-03 02:16:34 AM  

bborchar: The honeymoon that my husband and I wanted to take (but couldn't afford) was to Alaska. Maybe we'll get to it before our 15th anniversary.


Highly recommend experiencing Alaska. I've made a half dozen trips there and once solo hiked through the Mentasta Range in SE Alaska. Amazing country.
 
2018-03-03 02:31:04 AM  
The main reason I don't go to burning man anymore is because of a playa shaman that once whispered to me "swim up bar".

Thanks!
 
2018-03-03 03:02:52 AM  

theteacher: All I want to do is go to the Penguins.


But can you dance?
 
2018-03-03 03:03:37 AM  

phishrace: Negative - Constant sub-zero temperatures
Positive - The ice in your drink never melts

I'm going to have to think about this,


Negative your alcohol freezes.
 
2018-03-03 03:27:46 AM  
I can sleep naked a freezing, but draw the line at traveling commercial
 
2018-03-03 03:44:27 AM  

edmo: Join the military. You might get to do it for free.


Yeah, I did the military's SERE (Survival, Evasion, Resistance and Escape) School in Brunswick Maine in December, which is close enough for me to consider this box checked.
 
2018-03-03 03:50:35 AM  
My ideal vacations include lots of mountain biking and camping along the way.

Drinking comes after the ride of course. Beer is my recovery drink of choice.

Poolside vacations seem to me like they would be a waste of good riding time.

YMMV
 
2018-03-03 03:53:59 AM  

edmo: Join the military. You might get to do it for free.


You will get to do it for free.  And like it.
 
2018-03-03 04:24:48 AM  
Yeah no thanks, I hate being cold. Try tropical survival or a brothel survival course and Im there.
 
2018-03-03 04:54:06 AM  
So, basically, a typical winter afternoon on the way home from school where I grew up.

Adventure: doing something you're probably not supposed to be doing in somebody else's backyard.
 
2018-03-03 06:08:04 AM  
I'm Canadian, and I've ridden my motorcycle to Prudhoe bay. Also, I spent several years as an ERT in the oilpatch. I've already had enough days outside at -50, TYVM.

REALLY csb:

I once woke up in the medic shack at about oh dark thirty because I was cold. REALLY cold. Breath making clouds in my bunk cold. Got up, got dressed, went into the common room and checked the furnace. No pilot light. The piezo lighter worked, but no fuel. Looked out the window at the thermometer, it said -53 C. For those playing along at home, furnaces and stoves in the patch run on propane, not natural gas. Go ahead and google the boiling point of propane :P

The solution was to take a 20 lb bottle of propane and put it in the engine compartment of a water truck, then hook a tiger torch up to the bottle.

Imagine, if you will, the emergency response tech waving a really big blue flame across the bottom of the 500 lb tanks that run the furnace, and whenever the flame starts to shrink, playing it over the 20 lb bottle. Don't let the safety guy see you do this*. We then built "greenhouses" of poly sheeting and 2x4 around the bottles and put a couple of 500 watt halogen lights in each as heaters.

I'm also intimately familiar with heat tracing, because shiat stops flowing downhill if it freezes :P

*I'm usually the safety guy. I can't count how many times I've performed a field expedient and told everyone not to let the safety guy see it.
 
2018-03-03 07:32:17 AM  
Nope, St. Lucia this year, Bora Bora next. If it's a vacation it needs to be warm, relaxing, and tropical.
 
2018-03-03 07:43:02 AM  

Shakespeare's Monkey: Tell me more about the pool, and what drinks do they serve?


The pool is large, but it is not busy since it is in a remote location and the water is cold. Only people there seem to be men with beards and a taste for flannel and Goretex.
Drinks are served cold, but not as cold as the pool water or the ice and snow that covers everything.
 
2018-03-03 08:08:15 AM  

TwowheelinTim: My ideal vacations include lots of mountain biking and camping along the way.

Drinking comes after the ride of course. Beer is my recovery drink of choice.

Poolside vacations seem to me like they would be a waste of good riding time.

YMMV


This, right here.

Going for work to one of those all inclusive resorts next week. I'm looking forward to it and all, but I have no idea what to do with myself.

/sit there
//now what?
///three
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2018-03-03 09:02:36 AM  
GrendelMk1

You can keep your -50 C. Diesel gelling around -20 C was enough for me. (According to Wikipedia that's not much of a problem any more.)
 
2018-03-03 09:37:18 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size

courtesy of Jake Likes Onions, the best comic on the web.
 
2018-03-03 11:20:01 AM  
How about no?  Does no work for you?

Places to go on a vacation:  Cities with good food and comfy hotel rooms.

Places not to go on a vacation:  Everywhere else.
 
2018-03-03 11:56:03 AM  
41 year old ex-diplomat?  Wut?
 
2018-03-03 12:03:16 PM  

GrendelMk1: I'm Canadian, and I've ridden my motorcycle to Prudhoe bay. Also, I spent several years as an ERT in the oilpatch. I've already had enough days outside at -50, TYVM.

REALLY csb:

I once woke up in the medic shack at about oh dark thirty because I was cold. REALLY cold. Breath making clouds in my bunk cold. Got up, got dressed, went into the common room and checked the furnace. No pilot light. The piezo lighter worked, but no fuel. Looked out the window at the thermometer, it said -53 C. For those playing along at home, furnaces and stoves in the patch run on propane, not natural gas. Go ahead and google the boiling point of propane :P

The solution was to take a 20 lb bottle of propane and put it in the engine compartment of a water truck, then hook a tiger torch up to the bottle.

Imagine, if you will, the emergency response tech waving a really big blue flame across the bottom of the 500 lb tanks that run the furnace, and whenever the flame starts to shrink, playing it over the 20 lb bottle. Don't let the safety guy see you do this*. We then built "greenhouses" of poly sheeting and 2x4 around the bottles and put a couple of 500 watt halogen lights in each as heaters.

I'm also intimately familiar with heat tracing, because shiat stops flowing downhill if it freezes :P

*I'm usually the safety guy. I can't count how many times I've performed a field expedient and told everyone not to let the safety guy see it.


So Much This
 
2018-03-03 12:41:18 PM  
I'd prefer this to a beach resort. As much as I like a good beach, learning a new skill would be more fun.
 
2018-03-03 01:27:04 PM  
Please don't do this.  It will end up like mount Everest. Where the l9cals do all the work and the rich leave their trash behind.
 
2018-03-03 02:01:08 PM  
Make it the Antarctic. I have a co worker thats a flat Earther. So this would be epic.
 
2018-03-03 05:19:53 PM  
That's a real text heavy commercial.
 
2018-03-03 08:40:06 PM  

Tom Marvolo Bombadil: That's a real text heavy commercial.


Outside magazine is a really commercial heavy magazine in general. I kicked it to the curb close to twenty years ago. Would not buy again...
 
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