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(WHNT Huntsville)   Missing inmate found hiding in ceiling of Colorado jail   ( whnt.com) divider line
    More: Strange, detention center, 34-year-old Cody Crocker, Police, Sheriff, Constable, Douglas County Detention, Douglas County Sheriff, Colorado municipalities  
•       •       •

3591 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Feb 2018 at 10:20 AM (21 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



42 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2018-02-14 07:58:51 AM  
Ceiling con is watching you masturbate.
 
2018-02-14 08:53:31 AM  
Done in one.
I'll get the lights.
 
2018-02-14 09:58:06 AM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2018-02-14 10:15:21 AM  

dittybopper: Ceiling con is watching you masturbate.


Dammit, I've been working on this for an hour without checking the thread:

img.fark.netView Full Size


/I know, it sucks for an hour of work.
//Learned a lot though
 
2018-02-14 10:22:23 AM  
Goddamn ceiling cat is a snitch
 
2018-02-14 10:23:45 AM  
Only the best 5% of headlines copy pasta from TFA are approved.
 
2018-02-14 10:25:20 AM  
...reached the height of his potential right there.
 
2018-02-14 10:33:47 AM  
Did he duct out?
 
2018-02-14 10:35:23 AM  
Amateur, he should've set up a secret bunker with food, radio, and an empty swimming pool.  No one would bother looking there till there's a prison riot.  Well, it helps if you don't invite 9 other friends.
 
2018-02-14 10:37:33 AM  
Lionel Richie approves.
 
2018-02-14 10:38:54 AM  

slackananda: dittybopper: Ceiling con is watching you masturbate.

Dammit, I've been working on this for an hour without checking the thread:

[img.fark.net image 850x587]

/I know, it sucks for an hour of work.
//Learned a lot though


Kinda meta.
 
2018-02-14 10:42:01 AM  
So, he wasn't missing. He was just misplaced.
 
2018-02-14 10:43:33 AM  
Well, it's Colorado, so he was definitely (•_•) / ( •_•)>⌐■-■ / (⌐■_■) high.
 
2018-02-14 10:47:11 AM  
He was being held on 100 dollar bond
WAS
Now the dumbass upped the ante quite a bit
Now he gets to do a year or two for trying to escape
 
2018-02-14 10:48:16 AM  
Crocker was being held at the detention center on charges of attempt to influence a public servant; forgery, simulation impersonation and related offenses; shoplifting; and possession of drug paraphernalia.

"I am not really here officer. I am a hologram being projected into your mind by the lizard people. You should let me go."
 
2018-02-14 10:52:41 AM  

AintNoAmoeba: Crocker was being held at the detention center on charges of attempt to influence a public servant; forgery, simulation impersonation and related offenses; shoplifting; and possession of drug paraphernalia.

"I am not really here officer. I am a hologram being projected into your mind by the lizard people. You should let me go."


I wondered about that too. A quick google shows they missed a comma between the two words in quoting the statute.

https://law.justia.com/codes/colorado​/​2016/title-18/article-5/part-1/
 
2018-02-14 11:20:04 AM  

mikaloyd: He was being held on 100 dollar bond
WAS
Now the dumbass upped the ante quite a bit
Now he gets to do a year or two for trying to escape


$100 bond since February 5th. Poor and friendless.
 
2018-02-14 11:29:34 AM  

swahnhennessy: mikaloyd: He was being held on 100 dollar bond
WAS
Now the dumbass upped the ante quite a bit
Now he gets to do a year or two for trying to escape

$100 bond since February 5th. Poor and friendless.


Wouldn't be a stretch to imagine that his impulsive behavior had some part in that.
 
2018-02-14 11:32:52 AM  

slackananda: dittybopper: Ceiling con is watching you masturbate.

Dammit, I've been working on this for an hour without checking the thread:

[img.fark.net image 850x587]

/I know, it sucks for an hour of work.
//Learned a lot though


This is why Fark is great.
 
2018-02-14 11:44:05 AM  

slackananda: dittybopper: Ceiling con is watching you masturbate.

Dammit, I've been working on this for an hour without checking the thread:

[img.fark.net image 850x587]

/I know, it sucks for an hour of work.
//Learned a lot though


Hey, I appreciate your dedication to the new software.
Look forward to seeing your work in the photoshop threads.
 
2018-02-14 11:48:48 AM  

dittybopper: Ceiling con is watching you masturbate.


Which answers the question: 'What was he doing in the ceiling?"
 
2018-02-14 11:51:57 AM  

CarnySaur: Lionel Richie approves.


"Ohhh, what a feeling!  I'm fapping in the ceiling..."
 
2018-02-14 11:54:34 AM  
Crocker was being held at the detention center on charges of attempt to influence a public servant; forgery, simulation impersonation and related offenses; shoplifting; and possession of drug paraphernalia.
He was booked into the detention center by the Lone Tree Police Department on Feb. 5 and was being held on a $100 bond.


He gets booked for (relatively) minor charges. Instead of either fighting the charges or quietly serving his time, he decides to attempt to escape? Ratcheting his probable sentence up by a factor of 2 or 3?

This is not a smart man.
 
ih0.redbubble.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-14 12:12:11 PM  
*Checks article*
Holy crap, forget about the ceiling inmate, I want to know if Officer Wide Load's pants beep when he backs up.
 
2018-02-14 12:46:51 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-14 12:56:42 PM  

special20: swahnhennessy: mikaloyd: He was being held on 100 dollar bond
WAS
Now the dumbass upped the ante quite a bit
Now he gets to do a year or two for trying to escape

$100 bond since February 5th. Poor and friendless.

Wouldn't be a stretch to imagine that his impulsive behavior had some part in that.


The only real psychopath I know started lying and stealing from the people around him. Including me.
Graduated to manipulating girls into positions for date rape.
Went onto car Insurance scams (smacking his car up and calling it in as stolen just to get it painted a different color). And finally ending up stealing from his job or accepting bribes. Ended up in the slammer.
Saw him recently out, heart problems, body starting to fall apart.
Not even that close to 50.

Forgive me if I don't shed a tear.
 
2018-02-14 01:11:44 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-14 01:19:38 PM  

BigNumber12: slackananda: dittybopper: Ceiling con is watching you masturbate.

This is why Fark is great.


Resident Muslim: slackananda: dittybopper: Ceiling con is watching you masturbate.

Hey, I appreciate your dedication to the new software.
Look forward to seeing your work in the photoshop threads.


Thank you both so much, I appreciate the comments very much!
 
2018-02-14 01:35:32 PM  

johnsoninca: [img.fark.net image 640x360]
[img.fark.net image 640x480]


img.fark.netView Full Size

Seriously, he's like 3-3 1/2 of the dude next to him. Like I said above, I want to know if his pants beep when he backs up. I have so many questions. I mean, how does he get through the narrow doors they have in jails? I'm pretty sure turning sideways wouldn't do anything for him. Maybe he's the emergency barricade for the door in case of a riot? I'm guessing he rides a desk, because a squad car would bottom out on one side. But then again, he has to get his doughnuts from somewhere so maybe he does drive. Who knows?
 
2018-02-14 01:39:35 PM  
This was in my hometown! First time I've seen a Fark post mention it.

/CSB
 
2018-02-14 01:40:16 PM  

washington-babylon: johnsoninca: [img.fark.net image 640x360]
[img.fark.net image 640x480]

[img.fark.net image 640x360]
Seriously, he's like 3-3 1/2 of the dude next to him. Like I said above, I want to know if his pants beep when he backs up. I have so many questions. I mean, how does he get through the narrow doors they have in jails? I'm pretty sure turning sideways wouldn't do anything for him. Maybe he's the emergency barricade for the door in case of a riot? I'm guessing he rides a desk, because a squad car would bottom out on one side. But then again, he has to get his doughnuts from somewhere so maybe he does drive. Who knows?


Also why is the arm of that chair 4 feet long?
 
2018-02-14 01:57:54 PM  

jpcerutti: AintNoAmoeba: Crocker was being held at the detention center on charges of attempt to influence a public servant; forgery, simulation impersonation and related offenses; shoplifting; and possession of drug paraphernalia.

"I am not really here officer. I am a hologram being projected into your mind by the lizard people. You should let me go."

I wondered about that too. A quick google shows they missed a comma between the two words in quoting the statute.

https://law.justia.com/codes/colorado/​2016/title-18/article-5/part-1/


Whatever. I'm gonna continue to think he snapped his fingers, and was being invisible.

/SOAP
 
2018-02-14 02:10:49 PM  
Damn that a fat cop / guard.
Don't these guys have to past physicals?
Like where they have to run.
Or climb more than one flight of stairs.
 
2018-02-14 02:19:13 PM  
The ceiling, huh?

Anyone can pee on the floor, be a hero and shiat on the ceiling, maybe on this guy.
 
2018-02-14 02:27:13 PM  
So he is still in the ceiling cause they don't have a guard thin enough to go in and get him.
 
2018-02-14 02:50:18 PM  

vudukungfu: Done in one.
I'll get the lights.


Can't the guy in the ceiling do that?
 
2018-02-14 02:54:54 PM  

slackananda: dittybopper: Ceiling con is watching you masturbate.

Dammit, I've been working on this for an hour without checking the thread:

[img.fark.net image 850x587]

/I know, it sucks for an hour of work.
//Learned a lot though


Check out the Photoshop threads and PS forum linked from the desktop version of the site. There's plenty of opportunity to hone your craft, even if you're using MS Paint.

/I kid
//GIMP, if you want free software
 
2018-02-14 03:17:36 PM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2018-02-14 03:42:51 PM  
Please be Blago.... Please be Blago....  Please be Blago.... Reads article. Rats!
 
2018-02-14 04:42:56 PM  

washington-babylon: johnsoninca: [img.fark.net image 640x360]
[img.fark.net image 640x480]

[img.fark.net image 640x360]
Seriously, he's like 3-3 1/2 of the dude next to him. Like I said above, I want to know if his pants beep when he backs up. I have so many questions. I mean, how does he get through the narrow doors they have in jails? I'm pretty sure turning sideways wouldn't do anything for him. Maybe he's the emergency barricade for the door in case of a riot? I'm guessing he rides a desk, because a squad car would bottom out on one side. But then again, he has to get his doughnuts from somewhere so maybe he does drive. Who knows?


If I posted that on FB and it was a chick, I'd be in trouble for fat shaming a female.
But really, if you own a farking $10 full length mirror and you stand in front of it and can't see where your body ends on either side, you're fat.
You eat more food than you need to and there are people starving on this planet and that is greed of criminal proportions. It's like burning money when people are poor.
You just are being a major asshole when you are a food abuser.
You are an asshole to the poor, and the hungry, and an asshole to the medical community, and an asshole to everyone that has to put up with your invasion of space and it's not fat shaming to call assholes assholes.

Me: "This chick is fat"
Female community on social media: "Patriarchy says what? You fat shamer"
Me: To wit: Starving and poors, nor enough space on a flight, and a first responder with a hernia say you are an asshole for being overweight. Here are citations on how much morbid obesity costs our planet, you asshole. You fat asshole.
Female community on social media: "Whaaaaaaah. I'mma go cut myself. another piece of cheesecake."

But you don't own a farking $10 full length mirror because that's Oreo cookie money, right?

Not mad at you, mad at fatties that ought to not be fat.
 
2018-02-14 05:06:20 PM  

cyberspacedout: slackananda: dittybopper: Ceiling con is watching you masturbate.

Dammit, I've been working on this for an hour without checking the thread:

[img.fark.net image 850x587]

/I know, it sucks for an hour of work.
//Learned a lot though

Check out the Photoshop threads and PS forum linked from the desktop version of the site. There's plenty of opportunity to hone your craft, even if you're using MS Paint.

/I kid
//GIMP, if you want free software


Thanks for the tips! This one was just my second time using Photofiltre which is a fairly robust freeware program.
 
2018-02-14 06:21:37 PM  

slackananda: Thanks for the tips! This one was just my second time using Photofiltre which is a fairly robust freeware program.


You're welcome. I hadn't known about that one, being a Mac user, but you eventually learn how various effects can be achieved in any of these programs - even ones with limited features.

Also, once you figure out the interface and how to use various techniques, it gets much faster. I remember back when I started with PS threads here, I'd sometimes spend up to 2 hours. Now, provided I can think up an idea in the first place, a similar job can take me just a half hour or so.
 
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