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(The New Yorker)   Is your child spending too much time talking to fire? You better read this   ( newyorker.com) divider line
    More: Satire, Family, recent cave drawings, specific fire-watching times, familial power structures, non-fire family time, common fire-obsessed behaviors, traditional activities, powerful magical beings  
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4385 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Feb 2018 at 2:10 AM (21 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



34 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2018-02-12 10:26:35 PM  
After hearing an old man at a bar complain for 15 minutes about everyone using their cell phones that was great.  I'll have to print a copy of it for the old guy.
 
2018-02-12 10:44:11 PM  
You'll have my fire when you pry it from my hot, dead hands.
 
2018-02-12 10:58:14 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-13 02:15:33 AM  
She doesn't even know about the fSports competitive circuit.
 
2018-02-13 02:17:09 AM  
You, alright! I learned it by watching you!

chinadaily.com.cnView Full Size
 
2018-02-13 02:28:30 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-13 02:37:31 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-13 02:40:27 AM  
I can't get laid since fiyr became the new dating standard amongst this new generation! Time was, you'd go up to a nice caveman, bean him over the head with your club, and if he liked how big it was, he'd let you drag him by the hair off to your cave, or the local watering hole! Now everyone just sits around the local fermented vineyards poking their fiyr left or right, and nobody just TALKS to anyone anymore! We are doomed as a species, I tell you, doomed!
 
2018-02-13 02:43:16 AM  
I blame the flame pushers who spread the use of fire among our children. People like that should be punished by being tied-up to let birds feast upon their liver daily.

greekmyths-greekmythology.comView Full Size
 
2018-02-13 02:47:30 AM  
What's funny is when children hear fire talking to them.

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-13 02:50:21 AM  

Cpl.D: What's funny is when children hear fire talking to them.

[img.fark.net image 850x566]


dude. that is horrifying.

me, I miss sitting around enjoying a fresh raw meat kill with the family. it was just much more civilized.
 
2018-02-13 02:59:14 AM  
That lumbering attempt at humour has to be read in a Stewie Griffin voice.
 
2018-02-13 03:16:24 AM  
My husband and I just had a conversation about his parents constant complaints that our children spend too much time on their tablets. I'd send them this article, but I doubt they'd make the connection.
 
2018-02-13 04:06:22 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size

/oblig
 
2018-02-13 04:14:51 AM  
Don't let your daughters talk to the fire, do you want really ugly grandchildren?

pbs.twimg.comView Full Size

Because that can lead to really ugly, scary grandchildren
 
2018-02-13 04:22:26 AM  

stan unusual: Don't let your daughters talk to the fire, do you want really ugly grandchildren?

[pbs.twimg.com image 485x275]
Because that can lead to really ugly, scary grandchildren


I have no idea what that's from.
 
2018-02-13 04:23:58 AM  

Smoking GNU: stan unusual: Don't let your daughters talk to the fire, do you want really ugly grandchildren?

[pbs.twimg.com image 485x275]
Because that can lead to really ugly, scary grandchildren

I have no idea what that's from.


Talking to fire.  Didn't you just listen to him?
 
2018-02-13 06:05:15 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-13 06:07:00 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-13 06:08:36 AM  
I actually quite liked this article. Just the right 'silly to straight' ratio for my Swedish sense of humour. Lagom-funny, if you will. ;)
 
2018-02-13 06:10:35 AM  

orbister: That lumbering attempt at humour has to be read in a Stewie Griffin voice.


Wisnae pure gallus enough fur ye, bigman?
 
2018-02-13 06:59:38 AM  

LowbrowDeluxe: Smoking GNU: stan unusual: Don't let your daughters talk to the fire, do you want really ugly grandchildren?

[pbs.twimg.com image 485x275]
Because that can lead to really ugly, scary grandchildren

I have no idea what that's from.

Talking to fire.  Didn't you just listen to him?


Heh.

Game of Thrones reference. Melisandre spawning a shadow baby. Won't post video, because it's highly NSFW.
 
2018-02-13 07:06:30 AM  

uttertosh: orbister: That lumbering attempt at humour has to be read in a Stewie Griffin voice.

Wisnae pure gallus enough fur ye, bigman?


Jings! Crivvens! Help ma boab!
 
2018-02-13 07:11:25 AM  

Parthenogenetic: LowbrowDeluxe: Smoking GNU: stan unusual: Don't let your daughters talk to the fire, do you want really ugly grandchildren?

[pbs.twimg.com image 485x275]
Because that can lead to really ugly, scary grandchildren

I have no idea what that's from.

Talking to fire.  Didn't you just listen to him?

Heh.

Game of Thrones reference. Melisandre spawning a shadow baby. Won't post video, because it's highly NSFW.


...
Yeah, now that you mention it, it's obvious. Seen that scene twice now. Must be the low quality of the pic.
 
2018-02-13 07:26:38 AM  

Smoking GNU: Yeah, now that you mention it, it's obvious. Seen that scene twice now. Must be the low quality of the pic.


I was going more for this angle:
cdn.vox-cdn.comView Full Size

Less creepy, more booby.
 
2018-02-13 07:27:30 AM  

Smidge204: [img.fark.net image 480x360]


Came for Ralph
 
2018-02-13 07:33:29 AM  

razyjean: My husband and I just had a conversation about his parents constant complaints that our children spend too much time on their tablets. I'd send them this article, but I doubt they'd make the connection.


A more apt analogy would be Homeric era poets angry that dumb kids have to write things down instead of memorizing 50k lines.
 
2018-02-13 07:35:23 AM  

Kirzania: Smoking GNU: Yeah, now that you mention it, it's obvious. Seen that scene twice now. Must be the low quality of the pic.

I was going more for this angle:
[cdn.vox-cdn.com image 850x566]
Less creepy, more booby.


I hope you've learned your lesson from this.
 
2018-02-13 07:49:29 AM  

orbister: uttertosh: orbister: That lumbering attempt at humour has to be read in a Stewie Griffin voice.

Wisnae pure gallus enough fur ye, bigman?

Jings! Crivvens! Help ma boab!


HA!

/was introduced to the xmas tradition of giving 'The Broons' compendium whils in Glasgow.
//is there really a Gleeb Street in every Scottish town, or is that just 'pure rubbish, an aw that'?
 
2018-02-13 09:57:03 AM  

uttertosh: orbister: uttertosh: orbister: That lumbering attempt at humour has to be read in a Stewie Griffin voice.

Wisnae pure gallus enough fur ye, bigman?

Jings! Crivvens! Help ma boab!

HA!

/was introduced to the xmas tradition of giving 'The Broons' compendium whils in Glasgow.
//is there really a Gleeb Street in every Scottish town, or is that just 'pure rubbish, an aw that'?


It's spelled 'Glebe'. There are quite a few Glebe Streets out there. A Glebe is a patch of land which supports a clergyman.
Always liked the Broons.
And Oor Wullie.
 
2018-02-13 10:11:10 AM  

Tillmaster: uttertosh: orbister: uttertosh:

/was introduced to the xmas tradition of giving 'The Broons' compendium whils in Glasgow.
//is there really a Gleeb Street in every Scottish town, or is that just 'pure rubbish, an aw that'?

It's spelled 'Glebe'. There are quite a few Glebe Streets out there. A Glebe is a patch of land which supports a clergyman.
Always liked the Broons.
And Oor Wullie.


And today I learned something.  To folks here in Ottawa, the Glebe is our prototypical well-to-do liberal-minded urban neighborhood littered with coffee shops, book shops and artisanal everything.
 
2018-02-13 10:57:39 AM  

Tillmaster: It's spelled 'Glebe'.


*facepalm*

Så jävla pinsamt.
 
2018-02-13 10:59:56 AM  

uttertosh: Tillmaster: It's spelled 'Glebe'.

*facepalm*

Så jävla pinsamt.


Serves me right for trying to show off. LOL
 
2018-02-14 02:49:23 PM  
How has no one made this reference yet?

Hozier - Arsonist’s Lullabye (as heard on ‘The Walking Dead’ [Audio])
Youtube XoQvbDROucQ
 
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