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(WTOP)   We've all had that moment when a 2-year-old just won't shut up about the candy bar he wants in the store's checkout line. It's probably not good form to spank their hand and bottom right there in public, particularly when it's not your own child   ( wtop.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Associated Press, 62-year-old Juan Martinez, Newnan police report, candy bar, Newnan Times-Herald, Copyright, All rights reserved, body camera video  
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4682 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Feb 2018 at 9:02 PM (22 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



96 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2018-02-12 08:13:34 PM  
You're *supposed* to tell the little kid that there is free candy in the back of the upright freezer.
 
2018-02-12 09:04:45 PM  
jeffwinbush.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
2018-02-12 09:04:52 PM  
Strongly disagree!
 
2018-02-12 09:07:12 PM  
That seems like a thing everyone wants to do.
 
2018-02-12 09:07:39 PM  
For a moment, readng at the headline, I thought I was reading the PoliTab.

/then I finished the headline, and it was a real two years old
 
2018-02-12 09:08:19 PM  
FTA: "Police say Martinez was arrested on charges including battery and obstruction. News outlets reported Thursday that police body camera video shows officers struggling to arrest Martinez."

Well, he may get Battery, but nobody ever gets called for Obstruction any more, and the game's suffered for it.
 
2018-02-12 09:09:07 PM  
This reads like a scene from Bad Santa 3
 
2018-02-12 09:10:44 PM  
We've all wanted to do it...
 
2018-02-12 09:10:53 PM  
Don't do it.

Hero.
 
2018-02-12 09:10:55 PM  
Seems like there should be another paragraph talking about how dad beat the drunk a-hole down for smacking his kid. Maybe a booking photo showing the results of that beatdown too.
 
2018-02-12 09:16:22 PM  

Whatthefark: Seems like there should be another paragraph talking about how dad beat the drunk a-hole down for smacking his kid. Maybe a booking photo showing the results of that beatdown too.


I'm sure you can guess why he didn't, right?
 
2018-02-12 09:16:38 PM  

Whatthefark: Seems like there should be another paragraph talking about how dad beat the drunk a-hole down for smacking his kid. Maybe a booking photo showing the results of that beatdown too.


From other articles, here's the perp;
d21n0hs7dzf50x.cloudfront.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-12 09:16:54 PM  
My parents never hit me/spanked me or hit me.

But if I was being a real shiat, my mother would yank me to a private space and hiss in my face, "If you ever do that again, I will pull down your pants and spank your bare bottom in front of everyone."

Mom terror: it's real.
 
2018-02-12 09:17:09 PM  

Whatthefark: Seems like there should be another paragraph talking about how dad beat the drunk a-hole down for smacking his kid. Maybe a booking photo showing the results of that beatdown too.


Yep, what you said.
 
2018-02-12 09:18:00 PM  
Hmmmmm.......maybe a hero tag.
 
2018-02-12 09:19:20 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-12 09:23:03 PM  
I know Farkers are about to appear in this type thread saying something like, "you better not lay a hand on my kid."

Well guess what, tough guy, if I ever see your kid in public I will smack it right across its obnoxious face. And then after the smacking, I'll shake the bejeezus out of it. You will do nothing but cower, as you should, because it's a crowded restaurant/plane/grocery. You will just mumble, "th-th-thank you, Mr. Weedwagon, I'm too much a pussy to punish my own child."

You are welcome.
 
2018-02-12 09:24:14 PM  

Deranger: Whatthefark: Seems like there should be another paragraph talking about how dad beat the drunk a-hole down for smacking his kid. Maybe a booking photo showing the results of that beatdown too.

Yep, what you said.


There's a great GIF out there of some hipster douche messing with a black guy's toddler son at a fast food counter and dad quickly dispatching said douche.

Can't find it though...
 
2018-02-12 09:24:19 PM  
I would have really loved the story if he hadn't been a drunk but a regular, sober person who just got tired of the kid's whining.
 
2018-02-12 09:24:39 PM  
I usually just grab them by the two back legs, give their head a good WHACK! on the checkout counter, and throw it in their cart.

Shuts 'em right up.
 
2018-02-12 09:25:39 PM  

gonegirl: My parents never hit me/spanked me or hit me.

But if I was being a real shiat, my mother would yank me to a private space and hiss in my face, "If you ever do that again, I will pull down your pants and spank your bare bottom in front of everyone."

Mom terror: it's real.


Yep.  I remember being out at a store or a restaurant and seeing some squalling brat pitching a fit.  I knew that neither I or my siblings would ever do that, and kind of looked down on any kid that would.  It was sort of like, "For God's sake, kid, have some dignity.  You're not doing yourself any favors."
 
2018-02-12 09:28:13 PM  
I disagree subby.  Slap everyone, that's my policy.
 
2018-02-12 09:29:03 PM  

REO-Weedwagon: I know Farkers are about to appear in this type thread saying something like, "you better not lay a hand on my kid."

Well guess what, tough guy, if I ever see your kid in public I will smack it right across its obnoxious face. And then after the smacking, I'll shake the bejeezus out of it. You will do nothing but cower, as you should, because it's a crowded restaurant/plane/grocery. You will just mumble, "th-th-thank you, Mr. Weedwagon, I'm too much a pussy to punish my own child."

You are welcome.


My kid would kick your dad's ass and make you watch and eat popcorn.
 
2018-02-12 09:30:57 PM  

REO-Weedwagon: I know Farkers are about to appear in this type thread saying something like, "you better not lay a hand on my kid."

Well guess what, tough guy, if I ever see your kid in public I will smack it right across its obnoxious face. And then after the smacking, I'll shake the bejeezus out of it. You will do nothing but cower, as you should, because it's a crowded restaurant/plane/grocery. You will just mumble, "th-th-thank you, Mr. Weedwagon, I'm too much a pussy to punish my own child."

You are welcome.


I love that no one is even bothering with your lazy bait.
 
2018-02-12 09:31:46 PM  
Sigh. Missed it by a minute.
 
2018-02-12 09:33:53 PM  
If your kid is being a little shiat in the store and you let them interfere with my day, I will judge you first, them second and then I will solve their problems for them.


Which is what you should have being doing in the first place. Personally I have no issue with another adult reprimanding my kids if they go off the reservation. They need to know society is a mutual co-operation effort and the world is not their playpen.
 
2018-02-12 09:36:10 PM  

Bandito King: Sigh. Missed it by a minute.


Sorry. I was bored.
 
2018-02-12 09:36:26 PM  
adweek.comView Full Size
 
2018-02-12 09:40:17 PM  
I WAS SPANKED AND IT TAUGHT ME TO SAY SIR AND MAAM SHARE IF YOU AGREE!
 
2018-02-12 09:41:57 PM  

willfullyobscure: If your kid is being a little shiat in the store and you let them interfere with my day, I will judge you first, them second and then I will solve their problems for them.


Which is what you should have being doing in the first place. Personally I have no issue with another adult reprimanding my kids if they go off the reservation. They need to know society is a mutual co-operation effort and the world is not their playpen.


A 2 year old asking for candy does nothing to interfere with your day...but hey...you are a totes bad ass and completely normal
 
2018-02-12 09:42:47 PM  

gonegirl: My parents never hit me/spanked me or hit me.

But if I was being a real shiat, my mother would yank me to a private space and hiss in my face, "If you ever do that again, I will pull down your pants and spank your bare bottom in front of everyone."

Mom terror: it's real.


Ah, so she never followed through on her threats. Tsk tsk...bad parenting.
 
2018-02-12 09:42:59 PM  
Smack the parents and whip it out and piss on the kid.
Fark people that cannot instill some behavioral skills.

You put the parents and the little shiat brat in a crowd in Sudan and let them walk for three, four years away from machete wielding nut jobs for Allah Allah Allah and towards where there might be food, and you guess this because there is less human blood and more human excrement on the ground in the direction you are headed.
Spend a half a decade doing that then let me know that farking candy bar is looking pretty good right now, you spoiled rotten bastard.
This planet us full of insufferable bastards and some of them hack you up in the night.
Some of them scream for candy.
Some of them snap and you best not poke strangers with your little drama, kiddies.
People in a crowd are dangerous.
People that agree on a plan of action, more so.
Keep breeding and let then run wild.
The sad tide of what matters will eventually catch up.
That candy bar looks real good when you don't know how to earn a jingle in your pocket and your parents aren't there to buy it for you.
Kid is going to end up like the Trump boys, sucking off hoboes for half a stale big mac.
 
2018-02-12 09:48:45 PM  

willfullyobscure: If your kid is being a little shiat in the store and you let them interfere with my day, I will judge you first, them second and then I will solve their problems for them.


Which is what you should have being doing in the first place. Personally I have no issue with another adult reprimanding my kids if they go off the reservation. They need to know society is a mutual co-operation effort and the world is not their playpen.


It takes a village
 
2018-02-12 09:49:19 PM  
What I do is just open the candy bar and hand it to the kid.
 
2018-02-12 09:50:12 PM  

wellreadneck: [jeffwinbush.files.wordpress.com image 460x319]


Came to post this.
 
2018-02-12 09:51:04 PM  

Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: Whatthefark: Seems like there should be another paragraph talking about how dad beat the drunk a-hole down for smacking his kid. Maybe a booking photo showing the results of that beatdown too.

From other articles, here's the perp;
[d21n0hs7dzf50x.cloudfront.net image 600x461]


forrest whitaker???
 
2018-02-12 09:58:27 PM  

studebaker hoch: I usually just grab them by the two back legs, give their head a good WHACK! on the checkout counter, and throw it in their cart.

Shuts 'em right up.


Dad?
 
2018-02-12 10:00:24 PM  
Can't handle being around a whiny brat in public?

Somebody needs to stock up on badass pills.

The "punching down is never cool" rule also applies.
 
2018-02-12 10:02:53 PM  

willfullyobscure: If your kid is being a little shiat in the store and you let them interfere with my day, I will judge you first, them second and then I will solve their problems for them.


Which is what you should have being doing in the first place. Personally I have no issue with another adult reprimanding my kids if they go off the reservation. They need to know society is a mutual co-operation effort and the world is not their playpen.


That's nice.  Hope you realize that others may will inevitably have differing more extreme than you on what is an appropriate intervention though.
 
2018-02-12 10:03:24 PM  
more extreme views dammit
 
2018-02-12 10:05:07 PM  
There is a social contract at play.
1.  We agree not to dissaplin your kid
2.  Your child should have the appropriate amount of respect for the place and its age.

The kid should not be throwing fits in the grocery store.  If it is, you broke the contract.

 A kid should not be crying like all hell is breaking loose while in a restaurant or on a plane.  If they cannot control themselves (an infant), they shouldn't be there.

We didnt get a say in your choice to procreate, so the least you can do is raise the kid properly and only bring them out in public when they have proper training.  Isnt this agreement the best possible way?
 
2018-02-12 10:09:05 PM  
Better approach:
How to parent
Youtube ncq45_mj0BQ
 
2018-02-12 10:09:28 PM  

Fano: willfullyobscure: If your kid is being a little shiat in the store and you let them interfere with my day, I will judge you first, them second and then I will solve their problems for them.


Which is what you should have being doing in the first place. Personally I have no issue with another adult reprimanding my kids if they go off the reservation. They need to know society is a mutual co-operation effort and the world is not their playpen.

It takes a village


The whole village should slap the absentee parent.
 
2018-02-12 10:11:04 PM  
When I worked for a certain large toy retailer I swear to God I once saw a kid that looked about 10 reach up and slap his mom silly right across the face. I had to admire the balls on this brat: he had mom well-trained, and HeroScape expansions got purchased that day.
 
2018-02-12 10:17:35 PM  
It takes a village
 
2018-02-12 10:25:38 PM  

Rapmaster2000: I WAS SPANKED AND IT TAUGHT ME TO SAY SIR AND MAAM SHARE IF YOU AGREE!


You know, I come to Fark to get away from shiat like this.

Just sayin', is all.
 
2018-02-12 10:25:46 PM  

Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: Whatthefark: Seems like there should be another paragraph talking about how dad beat the drunk a-hole down for smacking his kid. Maybe a booking photo showing the results of that beatdown too.

From other articles, here's the perp;
[d21n0hs7dzf50x.cloudfront.net image 600x461]


Oh man. He looks like my drunk and angry Mexican uncle. He'd do that too...oh wait.
 
2018-02-12 10:28:48 PM  
i0.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2018-02-12 10:30:12 PM  

stinkyboss: Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: Whatthefark: Seems like there should be another paragraph talking about how dad beat the drunk a-hole down for smacking his kid. Maybe a booking photo showing the results of that beatdown too.

From other articles, here's the perp;
[d21n0hs7dzf50x.cloudfront.net image 600x461]

forrest whitaker???


Nah that's his cuz, Bosque Witaker.
 
2018-02-12 10:31:14 PM  

AmbassadorBooze: There is a social contract at play.
1.  We agree not to dissaplin your kid
2.  Your child should have the appropriate amount of respect for the place and its age.

The kid should not be throwing fits in the grocery store.  If it is, you broke the contract.

 A kid should not be crying like all hell is breaking loose while in a restaurant or on a plane.  If they cannot control themselves (an infant), they shouldn't be there.

We didnt get a say in your choice to procreate, so the least you can do is raise the kid properly and only bring them out in public when they have proper training.  Isnt this agreement the best possible way?


TFW you're a selfish asshole who thinks that minor disturbances in public places are a big deal
 
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