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(I Heart Radio)   Let a box of Cap'n Crunch go stale? That's a beatin'   ( wsrz.iheart.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Cap'n Crunch cereal, Violence, Crime, English-language films, Bullying, Aggression, Victim, Cap'n Crunch  
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2585 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Feb 2018 at 4:05 PM (23 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



42 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2018-02-09 03:05:13 PM  
Wait wait wait. You mean it's not made that way?
 
2018-02-09 03:09:59 PM  
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2018-02-09 03:52:25 PM  
Whatever it takes to defeat the Soggies
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-09 03:52:40 PM  
Breakfast cereal trifecta in play!

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-09 04:00:40 PM  
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2018-02-09 04:02:04 PM  

scottydoesntknow: [78.media.tumblr.com image 320x240]


At first I thought those kids were these kids

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2018-02-09 04:07:12 PM  
Ahh, the cereal that will make you bleed while eating it.
 
2018-02-09 04:07:45 PM  
I call bullshiat. How would you even know?
 
2018-02-09 04:08:51 PM  
Smith was especially angry since he is missing teeth, making it difficult to eat.

O_o  Why in the bloody hell would you ever buy Cap'n Crunch then?  That shiat is like razor blades when it's fresh, and you have teeth to help defend your vulnerable mouth flesh.
 
2018-02-09 04:08:52 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-09 04:09:37 PM  
Eating Cap'n Crunch - Cryptonomicon by Neal Stephenson
 
2018-02-09 04:10:11 PM  
If you ever find yourself in a place called ""Moundville," it's time to reassess your life.
 
OOF
2018-02-09 04:13:47 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-09 04:13:50 PM  
CSB: My brother in law, a chef at a country club, told me about a dishwasher at the club who didn't understand why people didn't like stale foods. The dishwasher said "It's just a different texture."
 
2018-02-09 04:15:49 PM  
Psst....Captain Crunch isn't really a captain. He's just some guy dressed up.
 
2018-02-09 04:17:21 PM  

blatz514: Ahh, the cereal that will make you bleed while eating it.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-09 04:17:27 PM  
Is that even possible?
 
2018-02-09 04:20:46 PM  
we as a species are literally never going to question what any man does where violence is concerned.  men are violent and stupid as fark and we should just accept this.  there is no changing it, and to try is rude.  women need to accept their roles and stop complaining and just let men do whatever they want.  they're going to, anyway.
 
2018-02-09 04:23:07 PM  

guestguy: Smith was especially angry since he is missing teeth, making it difficult to eat.

O_o  Why in the bloody hell would you ever buy Cap'n Crunch then?  That shiat is like razor blades when it's fresh, and you have teeth to help defend your vulnerable mouth flesh.


Cap'n Crunch is painless
It lacerates your anus
So I would take or leave it if I could
 
2018-02-09 04:24:02 PM  
I understand this.  Anyone who doesn't take the bag out of the box, fold the empty portion of the bag in half perpendicular to the direction you are about to roll it, roll it tightly leaving no air in the head space, and clip are heathens who should be punished.

/No, just rolling it and clipping in the middle doesn't count.  The fold is what keeps air from coming in from the sides.
 
2018-02-09 04:24:22 PM  

Gyrfalcon: Is that even possible?


Seriously, you could store a wet sponge in the bag and the things would still feel like a cross-breed between Corn Pops and obsidian arrowheads.
 
2018-02-09 04:25:14 PM  

guestguy: Smith was especially angry since he is missing teeth, making it difficult to eat.

O_o  Why in the bloody hell would you ever buy Cap'n Crunch then?  That shiat is like razor blades when it's fresh, and you have teeth to help defend your vulnerable mouth flesh.


Missing teeth
52
Has roommate
Lives in Moundville, AL (which apparently exists)

I dunno. A man can only take so much.
 
2018-02-09 04:27:41 PM  

Raspil: we as a species are literally never going to question what any man does where violence is concerned.  men are violent and stupid as fark and we should just accept this.  there is no changing it, and to try is rude.  women need to accept their roles and stop complaining and just let men do whatever they want.  they're going to, anyway.


interdastng
 
2018-02-09 04:29:05 PM  

Raspil: we as a species are literally never going to question what any man does where violence is concerned.  men are violent and stupid as fark and we should just accept this.  there is no changing it, and to try is rude.  women need to accept their roles and stop complaining and just let men do whatever they want.  they're going to, anyway.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-09 04:34:03 PM  

Raspil: we as a species are literally never going to question what any man does where violence is concerned.  men are violent and stupid as fark and we should just accept this.  there is no changing it, and to try is rude.  women need to accept their roles and stop complaining and just let men do whatever they want.  they're going to, anyway.


Uh.......
 
2018-02-09 04:37:34 PM  

stirfrybry: CSB: My brother in law, a chef at a country club, told me about a dishwasher at the club who didn't understand why people didn't like stale foods. The dishwasher said "It's just a different texture."



Most likely one of the reasons he washes dishes for a living

/NTTAWWT
 
2018-02-09 04:38:11 PM  
Raspil:  women need to accept their roles and stop complaining and just let men do whatever they want.  they're going to, anyway.
i.imgflip.comView Full Size
 
2018-02-09 04:42:00 PM  
So, I Heart Radio is now in the click-bait game?  Is Buzzfeed now doing music?
 
2018-02-09 04:44:42 PM  

Fano: guestguy: Smith was especially angry since he is missing teeth, making it difficult to eat.

O_o  Why in the bloody hell would you ever buy Cap'n Crunch then?  That shiat is like razor blades when it's fresh, and you have teeth to help defend your vulnerable mouth flesh.

Cap'n Crunch is painless
It lacerates your anus
So I would take or leave it if I could


Motherfarker.

I get home from work just as MASH is coming on, and I leave it on as background noise while I get dinner, etc.....

you have ruined it for me.  forever.
 
2018-02-09 04:58:25 PM  
At least he wasn't a cereal killer.
 
2018-02-09 05:03:28 PM  
Randy Shaftoe wanted for questioning...
 
2018-02-09 05:12:28 PM  

70Ford: Raspil:  women need to accept their roles and stop complaining and just let men do whatever they want.  they're going to, anyway.
[i.imgflip.com image 581x500]


Yeah, the last thing she needs is another sammich.
 
2018-02-09 05:29:00 PM  

blatz514: Ahh, the cereal that will make you bleed while eating it.


Not when they're stale.
 
2018-02-09 05:56:55 PM  
How do you eat Cap'n Crunch with no teeth?  You'd have to let it sit in the milk for about 20 minutes.  I have all my teeth and the roof of my mouth always gets shredded no matter how careful I am.
 
2018-02-09 05:57:43 PM  
I have printed this out and have taped it to our cereal cupboard. We've all wanted to beat the snot out of folks who don't seal the farking bag.

Come to think of it, nearly every other bagged product has a zip lock thing. Why not cereal? Because the man wants it to stale so you buy more, like the chump you are.
 
2018-02-09 06:22:23 PM  
I bet you could use a handful of Cap'n Crunch to strip the paint off a car.
 
2018-02-09 06:34:54 PM  
Fresh Cap'n Crunch is like eating a fistful of legos.
 
2018-02-09 06:37:07 PM  
Letting food go to waste due to stupidity is an ass whipping no matter how old you are anywhere.
 
2018-02-09 06:56:09 PM  
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There. Now kiss and make up.
 
2018-02-09 09:02:03 PM  
tse1.mm.bing.netView Full Size

If it was Crunch Berries I can completely understand.
 
2018-02-09 10:32:28 PM  
I'm confused? Doesn't cereal get soggy/soft if you do not properly close the bag? And if so, wouldn't he (the 'attacker') prefer it if he didn't properly close the bag?
 
2018-02-10 12:44:15 AM  

Hollie Maea: Randy Shaftoe wanted for questioning...


Randy Waterhouse, even. Jesus I need to read that book again apparently.
 
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