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(AZCentral)   $7 million Scottsdale mansion to be auctioned online. No minimum bid, maybe your $5 will take this six bedroom, eleven bathroom home   ( azcentral.com) divider line
    More: Interesting, 12,000-square-foot stone mansion, Russ Lyon, upscale Scottsdale Estancia, Auction, private client group, public real estate, highest bidder, Concierge Auctions  
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4535 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Feb 2018 at 1:05 PM (22 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2018-02-09 08:37:17 AM  
"Auctions can successfully sell the finer tangibles in life," said Frank Aazami, founder of the private client group at Russ Lyon. "Our objective is to strike a conversation, motivate people who have been sitting on the fence and get their property sold in the process."

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2018-02-09 09:46:52 AM  
Sure, your $5 bid may win, as long as you can qualify to bid by proving you can afford a $7,000,000 house.
 
2018-02-09 11:10:09 AM  
It will sell for well beyond that... real estate bubble is pumped nicely right now.
 
2018-02-09 01:08:06 PM  
Bidding starts at 4 p.m. Friday, Feb. 9. Buyers must be pre-qualified - show they have the money to purchase the mansion - before they can bid.

Well, if I bid $20, I'm pretty sure that I can prove that I have $20. Problem solved.
 
2018-02-09 01:09:01 PM  
Yeah, "no reserve" sure.

jlawthumbsup.jpg
 
2018-02-09 01:09:38 PM  
Eleven bathrooms? Do the rich really sh*t that much more often than us poors?
 
2018-02-09 01:11:35 PM  
Yeah,  but the property tax bill will kill you.
 
2018-02-09 01:12:40 PM  
You may have the $20, but what about the huge property tax bill?
 
2018-02-09 01:12:49 PM  
I'll save my $5 for TF, tyvm.
 
2018-02-09 01:14:01 PM  
But then I would have to live in Scottsdale :P
 
2018-02-09 01:15:13 PM  
I don't think I could afford the cost to replace the water lost to evaporation in a Scottsdale pool.
 
2018-02-09 01:15:36 PM  
That's a really nice house. I like the decore a lot. Of course I can't afford it but even if I could I wouldn't want a house that big. Hell I live in an 1100 sqft house and have rooms I haven't been in in 6 months or more.
 
2018-02-09 01:16:52 PM  

mrsleep: But then I would have to live in Scottsdale :P


Came here for this. Scottsdale is like a big mall for geezer yuppies surrounded by a gigantic parking lot. You couldn't pay me to live there.
 
2018-02-09 01:17:18 PM  
But it's in Arizona.
 
2018-02-09 01:18:25 PM  

Perrybucsdad: You may have the $20, but what about the huge property tax bill?


Just petition the county to reassess the property at its purchase price.  Problem solved!
 
2018-02-09 01:19:16 PM  

abhorrent1: Hell I live in an 1100 sqft house and have rooms I haven't been in in 6 months or more.


I too have millennial children living at home. Henry Jr is presently holed up in my rec room. I doubt I'll ever see it in my lifetime.
 
2018-02-09 01:20:03 PM  

The Third Man: Perrybucsdad: You may have the $20, but what about the huge property tax bill?

Just petition the county to reassess the property at its purchase price.  Problem solved!


LOL
OK, I'd like to see how works out. Government has the chance to increase revenue? What could go wrong?
 
2018-02-09 01:23:05 PM  

oldfarthenry: Eleven bathrooms? Do the rich really sh*t that much more often than us poors?


It's not about quantity, it's distance.  I mean, it's a mansion...and maybe eating all that rich fancy food they don't wanna be caught too far from a crapper at any time.
 
2018-02-09 01:23:18 PM  
Who was the decorator - FSM - add some color, will ya?  If I wanted to live in the great Arizona outdoors with a variety of sand shades, I'd live outdoors.
 
2018-02-09 01:23:23 PM  

The Third Man: Perrybucsdad: You may have the $20, but what about the huge property tax bill?

Just petition the county to reassess the property at its purchase price.  Problem solved!


Around here, that gets you one year.  Then the county starts jacking the assessment up, saying your property is constantly increasing in value.  Within a few years, it's valued way, way, way over what you could sell for.  Then you default on the taxes, and the county has a nice property to auction.
 
2018-02-09 01:23:38 PM  

abhorrent1: That's a really nice house. I like the decore a lot. Of course I can't afford it but even if I could I wouldn't want a house that big. Hell I live in an 1100 sqft house and have rooms I haven't been in in 6 months or more.


I hear yah.  I'm that way in my 1 bedroom apartment.  Haven't had a reason to go into the bedroom in like a year....
 
2018-02-09 01:26:01 PM  
The $6,999,995 HOA fee is something to consider though.
 
2018-02-09 01:27:39 PM  

DORMAMU: abhorrent1: That's a really nice house. I like the decore a lot. Of course I can't afford it but even if I could I wouldn't want a house that big. Hell I live in an 1100 sqft house and have rooms I haven't been in in 6 months or more.

I hear yah.  I'm that way in my 1 bedroom apartment.  Haven't had a reason to go into the bedroom in like a year....


Where do you sleep?
 
2018-02-09 01:27:58 PM  

Ixnay on the ottenray: Who was the decorator - FSM - add some color, will ya?  If I wanted to live in the great Arizona outdoors with a variety of sand shades, I'd live outdoors.


obviously a larper, probably penned it from his suit of armour.
 
2018-02-09 01:29:08 PM  
That is a beautiful house, I couldn't imagine living in such luxury.  I don't think I'd be able to even afford the air conditioning bill.
 
2018-02-09 01:31:54 PM  
farking burn it down along with the rest of that plastic smarmy frosted tip town

/ hates scottsdale and almost everyone who lives there
// is not rich or really really really really really really good-looking
 
2018-02-09 01:31:59 PM  
Too beige. Would not bid.
 
2018-02-09 01:43:26 PM  
buy it, never live in it and just rent on airbnb to rich golfers
 
2018-02-09 01:47:31 PM  

Catlenfell: Yeah,  but the property tax bill will kill you.


Came here for this.

Leaving satisfied....
 
2018-02-09 01:52:42 PM  

Perrybucsdad: You may have the $20, but what about the huge property tax bill?


The "fee' That subby's mom pays me weekly will cover that.
 
2018-02-09 01:52:56 PM  

mr_larry: DORMAMU: abhorrent1: That's a really nice house. I like the decore a lot. Of course I can't afford it but even if I could I wouldn't want a house that big. Hell I live in an 1100 sqft house and have rooms I haven't been in in 6 months or more.

I hear yah.  I'm that way in my 1 bedroom apartment.  Haven't had a reason to go into the bedroom in like a year....

Where do you sleep?


Couch or computer chair would be my guess.
 
2018-02-09 01:54:25 PM  

cherryl taggart: The Third Man: Perrybucsdad: You may have the $20, but what about the huge property tax bill?

Just petition the county to reassess the property at its purchase price.  Problem solved!

Around here, that gets you one year.  Then the county starts jacking the assessment up, saying your property is constantly increasing in value.  Within a few years, it's valued way, way, way over what you could sell for.  Then you default on the taxes, and the county has a nice property to auction.


That's why you sell it immediately. Hell, sell it for a million and you have a million in profit.
 
2018-02-09 01:54:54 PM  

mr_larry: DORMAMU: abhorrent1: That's a really nice house. I like the decore a lot. Of course I can't afford it but even if I could I wouldn't want a house that big. Hell I live in an 1100 sqft house and have rooms I haven't been in in 6 months or more.

I hear yah.  I'm that way in my 1 bedroom apartment.  Haven't had a reason to go into the bedroom in like a year....

Where do you sleep?


Mom's basement?
 
2018-02-09 02:03:35 PM  
The outside shot reminded me of a house in blow
 
2018-02-09 02:09:00 PM  
Has anyone mentioned property taxes yet?  They have?  OK, well you'll have to live in Snottsdale, so there's that.
 
2018-02-09 02:12:04 PM  

edmo: It will sell for well beyond that... real estate bubble is pumped nicely right now.


Not necessarily in Phoenix right now.

Also - enjoy paying taxes on that $7 million home.
 
2018-02-09 02:16:25 PM  

Fear the Clam: mrsleep: But then I would have to live in Scottsdale :P

Came here for this. Scottsdale is like a big mall for geezer yuppies surrounded by a gigantic parking lot. You couldn't pay me to live there.


The funny thing about Scottsdale is that it's huge.  This one, in Estancia, is just down the road from me, a five minute drive.  It's in a very isolated part of Scottsdale right near some of the best mountain biking trails in the county - 60+ miles of trail and tens of thousands of acres of open space between Brown's Ranch and McDowell Mountain Park.  It's well outside of the 101 loop and away from almost all of the ritzy old-folks parts of central Scottsdale.
 
2018-02-09 02:19:16 PM  

walkerhound: Also - enjoy paying taxes on that $7 million home.


This is Scottsdale. The air conditioning bill is larger than the property tax one.
 
2018-02-09 02:23:28 PM  

sunderland56: walkerhound: Also - enjoy paying taxes on that $7 million home.

This is Scottsdale. The air conditioning bill is larger than the property tax one.


That's true.  We're on solar so our air conditioning bill is 0.  Otherwise it'd be close to twice that of our property taxes.
 
2018-02-09 02:24:40 PM  
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2018-02-09 02:32:18 PM  

Harry Freakstorm: But it's in Arizona.


Ding! Ding! Ding! We have a winner. Would like to thank all the other contestants who participated.

Sheriff Joe voted in multiple times. (80% support for a man that boasted he spent more money on feeding the dogs than the inmates) Desert heat so oppressive that the gravel blisters your feet... Heat so miserable and stifling that you instantly regret the moment you get out to pump your gas. Angry old people that migrated away from the good states. The majority of voters that claim that they really don't hate brown people but vote for candidates that are elected primarily on the basis of their success in reminding those same voters just how terrible brown people are. Seriously, Jan Farking Brewer? Teacher shortages that seem to only get worse. Mormon polygamy spin-off cults that marry children under 12.

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I realize I'm painting with a pretty wide brush, but I'm sorry if facts lean towards my side. i could make the same claim about any number of places I'd never choose to live in or plans as a vacation destination (See also Alabama, Oklahoma, Utah, Kansas, Mississippi, and most of Louisiana)

Sure, I know everyone loves that amazing natural wonder of the world's most beautiful giant hole...
but I don't want to keep piling on about Jan Brewer's gaping maw.
 
2018-02-09 02:39:23 PM  
that's a very nice house.
 
2018-02-09 02:47:04 PM  

Dahnkster: Harry Freakstorm: But it's in Arizona.

Ding! Ding! Ding! We have a winner. Would like to thank all the other contestants who participated.

Sheriff Joe voted in multiple times. (80% support for a man that boasted he spent more money on feeding the dogs than the inmates) Desert heat so oppressive that the gravel blisters your feet... Heat so miserable and stifling that you instantly regret the moment you get out to pump your gas. Angry old people that migrated away from the good states. The majority of voters that claim that they really don't hate brown people but vote for candidates that are elected primarily on the basis of their success in reminding those same voters just how terrible brown people are. Seriously, Jan Farking Brewer? Teacher shortages that seem to only get worse. Mormon polygamy spin-off cults that marry children under 12.

[img.fark.net image 620x330][img.fark.net image 400x273][img.fark.net image 320x160][img.fark.net image 500x250][img.fark.net image 625x415]

I realize I'm painting with a pretty wide brush, but I'm sorry if facts lean towards my side. i could make the same claim about any number of places I'd never choose to live in or plans as a vacation destination (See also Alabama, Oklahoma, Utah, Kansas, Mississippi, and most of Louisiana)

Sure, I know everyone loves that amazing natural wonder of the world's most beautiful giant hole...
but I don't want to keep piling on about Jan Brewer's gaping maw.


Oh f*ck off.
 
2018-02-09 02:52:03 PM  
That is one ugly house (inside & outside)!
 
2018-02-09 02:57:14 PM  
 
2018-02-09 03:13:06 PM  
 
2018-02-09 03:56:46 PM  

slackananda: Sure, your $5 bid may win, as long as you can qualify to bid by proving you can afford a $7,000,000 house.


Just like being able to get in on an IPO.  "Don't have a $250K nest egg, even though you only want to risk $5K?  Sorry, no stock for you!"  Of course, there's no such rule to prevent that same person from risking the same $5K on any other stock.

Also, I wonder about taxes, liens, etc.  Gotta be a reason the owner is taking a chance like this.
 
2018-02-09 03:56:52 PM  

DORMAMU: abhorrent1: That's a really nice house. I like the decore a lot. Of course I can't afford it but even if I could I wouldn't want a house that big. Hell I live in an 1100 sqft house and have rooms I haven't been in in 6 months or more.

I hear yah.  I'm that way in my 1 bedroom apartment.  Haven't had a reason to go into the bedroom in like a year....


Is your name Mulder, by any chance?

Fear the Clam: mrsleep: But then I would have to live in Scottsdale :P

Came here for this. Scottsdale is like a big mall for geezer yuppies surrounded by a gigantic parking lot. You couldn't pay me to live there.


If someone offered to pay me to live in Scottsdale I'd be willing to negotiate, but it would have to be enough money that I'd never have to work again.
 
2018-02-09 04:25:43 PM  
Coolish garage, but are all houses in Scottsdale as hideous as that?
 
2018-02-09 04:40:21 PM  
Come for the heat, stay for the environmental superfund site that is the Indian Bend Wash sponsored by Motorola.

/just dump those wafer cleaning chemicals in the river... what could possibly go wrong?
 
2018-02-09 04:46:49 PM  

ukexpat: Coolish garage, but are all houses in Scottsdale as hideous as that?


If you think the houses are ugly, you should see the residents.
 
2018-02-09 05:09:51 PM  
As a (now) older Minnesotan, I'll oblige.
Ahem.....
Christ, what does it cost to heat a place like that?
 
2018-02-09 05:12:36 PM  

hunh: As a (now) older Minnesotan, I'll oblige.
Ahem.....
Christ, what does it cost to heat a place like that?


I can count on two hands how many days our heat pump ran this winter.  Cooling, on the other hand.
 
2018-02-09 05:22:11 PM  

hunh: Christ, what does it cost to heat a place like that?


Coldest day of winter: 65 degree high, 42 degree low.

So, almost nothing.
 
2018-02-09 06:06:51 PM  

Dahnkster: Contrabulous Flabtraption: Oh f*ck off.

[soundthemidnightcry.com image 236x194]


You're just awful to be around, aren't you?
 
2018-02-09 06:40:37 PM  

Fear the Clam: mrsleep: But then I would have to live in Scottsdale :P

Came here for this. Scottsdale is like a big mall for geezer yuppies surrounded by a gigantic parking lot. You couldn't pay me to live there.


You know how I know you've never been here before?

We wouldn't want your type, anyway.
 
2018-02-09 06:57:45 PM  

Infobahn: Fear the Clam: mrsleep: But then I would have to live in Scottsdale :P

Came here for this. Scottsdale is like a big mall for geezer yuppies surrounded by a gigantic parking lot. You couldn't pay me to live there.

You know how I know you've never been here before?

We wouldn't want your type, anyway.


Not only have I been there, my aunt used to sell real estate there. I've probably seen parts of that hellscape that you could only dream of. But keep on being you, cowboy.
 
2018-02-09 10:13:16 PM  

Contrabulous Flabtraption: You're just awful to be around, aren't you?


Says the guy who says Go F*ck yourself.

 
2018-02-10 12:43:11 AM  

TNel: mr_larry: DORMAMU: abhorrent1: That's a really nice house. I like the decore a lot. Of course I can't afford it but even if I could I wouldn't want a house that big. Hell I live in an 1100 sqft house and have rooms I haven't been in in 6 months or more.

I hear yah.  I'm that way in my 1 bedroom apartment.  Haven't had a reason to go into the bedroom in like a year....

Where do you sleep?

Couch or computer chair would be my guess.


winner winner chicken dinner.

usually i pass out while lurking on fark at the computer on on the tablet on the love seat
 
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