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(Maxim Magazine)   Time to panic, lime sales are going to get hit very hard   ( maxim.com) divider line
    More: Scary, Farmer, Reuters, Agave, tequila, Farmers, slightly sketchy measures, New York Post, fine tequila  
•       •       •

6878 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Feb 2018 at 4:05 PM (23 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2018-02-08 01:08:22 PM  
foreveryoungadult.comView Full Size

Oh, my beautiful limes.
 
2018-02-08 01:13:03 PM  
So how do I get rid of this body now?
 
2018-02-08 01:14:55 PM  
Simple solution, make everyone who likes an occasional shot or two on a night out have to drink a whole bottle. 2 days later when they're recovered they will never touch the stuff again.

Worked for me.
 
2018-02-08 01:20:36 PM  
Jose kicked my ass WAY too many times for me to feel really bad about this

/I prefer bourbon these days
 
2018-02-08 01:59:48 PM  
Soooo, what you're saying is, bars won't be paying top dollar for limes to go with their tequila, so the price of limes at my local supermarket is going down?  Because I'm OK with that.
 
2018-02-08 03:06:14 PM  
Tequila only comes from Mexico so with Trump in office a price increase was inevitable so I've already been preparing.
 
2018-02-08 03:28:19 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Soooo, what you're saying is, bars won't be paying top dollar for limes to go with their tequila, so the price of limes at my local supermarket is going down?  Because I'm OK with that.


Wouldn't mind seeing lemon prices go down myself. Last time I was at the store they were $1 each.
 
2018-02-08 04:06:39 PM  
"Tequila is, basically, just too damn good."

lol no
 
2018-02-08 04:07:05 PM  
Time to get some put options on the lime futures market, Mortimer.
 
2018-02-08 04:07:44 PM  
Lime was meant for gin and tonics anyway...
 
2018-02-08 04:10:32 PM  
Such a silly woman
 
2018-02-08 04:12:40 PM  
But what about coconuts? I need something to put my limes in.
 
2018-02-08 04:12:51 PM  

Bathia_Mapes: Benevolent Misanthrope: Soooo, what you're saying is, bars won't be paying top dollar for limes to go with their tequila, so the price of limes at my local supermarket is going down?  Because I'm OK with that.

Wouldn't mind seeing lemon prices go down myself. Last time I was at the store they were $1 each.


I have a big lemon tree on my property so I generally have enough lemons around for my own use (I make lemonade and use lemons in my cooking).

But I threw a party back in December and needed more lemons than usual. So I went to the store, and that was the day I learned that at any given time, there are ~$30-$40 worth of lemons on my tree.

// I also have some juvenile orange trees, I should dig them up and plant some limes.
 
2018-02-08 04:14:42 PM  
Coconut sales expected to also drop.

The Muppet Show - Lime in the Coconut
Youtube Fy2U6AK9P6Q
 
2018-02-08 04:16:32 PM  
Good Gawd - just put a slice of something else on your drink like cheese or birthday cake!
 
2018-02-08 04:17:06 PM  
Obligatory:
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-08 04:17:18 PM  

lordargent: Bathia_Mapes: Benevolent Misanthrope: Soooo, what you're saying is, bars won't be paying top dollar for limes to go with their tequila, so the price of limes at my local supermarket is going down?  Because I'm OK with that.

Wouldn't mind seeing lemon prices go down myself. Last time I was at the store they were $1 each.

I have a big lemon tree on my property so I generally have enough lemons around for my own use (I make lemonade and use lemons in my cooking).

But I threw a party back in December and needed more lemons than usual. So I went to the store, and that was the day I learned that at any given time, there are ~$30-$40 worth of lemons on my tree.

// I also have some juvenile orange trees, I should dig them up and plant some limes.


A lemon party?
 
2018-02-08 04:17:29 PM  
I'm sure I've read this story before. Last time around, the blame was corn prices were going up due to biofuel subsidies so farmers were planting corn instead of replanting agave.

Now the question has to be "have they met the max planting efficiency for this crop?" Also, would it still be tequilla if you start growing agave elsewhere?
 
2018-02-08 04:19:42 PM  
Fine by me. Every time I drink that stuff, I end up seeing badges and flashing lights and then the cops show up!
 
2018-02-08 04:19:56 PM  
Finally people will be forced to drink gin properly.
 
2018-02-08 04:20:10 PM  
Oh, tequila. Phew, you had me worried subby.
img.fark.netView Full Size

Mmmm gin.
 
2018-02-08 04:21:52 PM  

Do you know the way to Mordor: A lemon party?


A Mojito party, but I ran low on cups so two girls had to share.
 
2018-02-08 04:24:35 PM  

Do you know the way to Mordor: lordargent: Bathia_Mapes: Benevolent Misanthrope: Soooo, what you're saying is, bars won't be paying top dollar for limes to go with their tequila, so the price of limes at my local supermarket is going down?  Because I'm OK with that.

Wouldn't mind seeing lemon prices go down myself. Last time I was at the store they were $1 each.

I have a big lemon tree on my property so I generally have enough lemons around for my own use (I make lemonade and use lemons in my cooking).

But I threw a party back in December and needed more lemons than usual. So I went to the store, and that was the day I learned that at any given time, there are ~$30-$40 worth of lemons on my tree.

// I also have some juvenile orange trees, I should dig them up and plant some limes.

A lemon party?


Till the juice runs down my leg.
 
2018-02-08 04:25:21 PM  

Do you know the way to Mordor: A lemon party?



Most of us know what a lemon party is (ew), but what is a lime party.

Side note:

I've used the following team names during trivia night at a bar...feel free use them if you want to:

A Jerry Jones Lemon Party Christmas (Somebody on Fark suggested it, so I went with it.)

A Jerry Jones Lemon Party Christmas with Special Guest Robert Kraft (I added the last part.)
 
2018-02-08 04:25:32 PM  
Guess I'll just have to settle for more caipirinhas.
 
2018-02-08 04:25:32 PM  

skiinstructor: Lime was meant for gin and tonics anyway...


do you mean jynnan tonyx ?
 
2018-02-08 04:26:18 PM  

lordargent: Bathia_Mapes: Benevolent Misanthrope: Soooo, what you're saying is, bars won't be paying top dollar for limes to go with their tequila, so the price of limes at my local supermarket is going down?  Because I'm OK with that.

Wouldn't mind seeing lemon prices go down myself. Last time I was at the store they were $1 each.

I have a big lemon tree on my property so I generally have enough lemons around for my own use (I make lemonade and use lemons in my cooking).

But I threw a party back in December and needed more lemons than usual. So I went to the store, and that was the day I learned that at any given time, there are ~$30-$40 worth of lemons on my tree.

// I also have some juvenile orange trees, I should dig them up and plant some limes.


Really jealous.  You should consider putting up some preserved lemons & making Moroccan dishes.
 
2018-02-08 04:28:40 PM  

Bathia_Mapes: Benevolent Misanthrope: Soooo, what you're saying is, bars won't be paying top dollar for limes to go with their tequila, so the price of limes at my local supermarket is going down?  Because I'm OK with that.

Wouldn't mind seeing lemon prices go down myself. Last time I was at the store they were $1 each.


*checks the tree*
Hmm.
Sorry to hear that.
 
2018-02-08 04:30:13 PM  
That's OK, I'll have mezcal !
 
2018-02-08 04:33:49 PM  
It's ok, I live in California. I can walk into my backyard & get some. And avocados. If I'm out neighbor on right has lemons & avocados. Neighbor on left though is a dick. Not my fault his wife didn't close the blinds that night. She needs to shed a few pounds anyway. I wasn't there long, 15 minutes tops. You know how hard it is to find a lime in the dark?
 
2018-02-08 04:34:57 PM  

Slaxl: Simple solution, make everyone who likes an occasional shot or two on a night out have to drink a whole bottle. 2 days later when they're recovered they will never touch the stuff again.

Worked for me.


One of my wife's friends is a tiny woman, perhaps 90 lb. She did some serious damage to a bottle of tequila and had a monumental hangover the next day. We put her on the train to go home, and while on board she saw an advert for tequila and threw-up: apparently projectile vomiting. I don't think she'll ever drink tequila again.
 
2018-02-08 04:36:59 PM  

Evil Mackerel: Oh, tequila. Phew, you had me worried subby.
[img.fark.net image 500x325]
Mmmm gin.


Do you put lime in scotch?
 
2018-02-08 04:38:24 PM  
Good. Limes are great and tequila sucks.
 
2018-02-08 04:41:12 PM  
Me scurvy!
 
2018-02-08 04:41:16 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-08 04:42:28 PM  

lordargent: Bathia_Mapes: Benevolent Misanthrope: Soooo, what you're saying is, bars won't be paying top dollar for limes to go with their tequila, so the price of limes at my local supermarket is going down?  Because I'm OK with that.

Wouldn't mind seeing lemon prices go down myself. Last time I was at the store they were $1 each.

I have a big lemon tree on my property so I generally have enough lemons around for my own use (I make lemonade and use lemons in my cooking).

But I threw a party back in December and needed more lemons than usual. So I went to the store, and that was the day I learned that at any given time, there are ~$30-$40 worth of lemons on my tree.

// I also have some juvenile orange trees, I should dig them up and plant some limes.


Back in the before time, my neighbor had an avocado tree and lemon tree that overhung my driveway.  There was also an orange tree but it wasn't relevant to my interests.  Free guac the whole time I lived there.  I was stunned when I moved and found out what stores charge for avocados, even in SoCal.
 
2018-02-08 04:42:55 PM  
CSB: Me and tequila are not friends any more. End CSB.
 
2018-02-08 04:49:22 PM  

culebra: Good. Limes are great and tequila sucks.



My response will be the same as when somebody says they don't like seafood:

Yay!  More for me!
 
2018-02-08 04:57:47 PM  
Forget about the limes, there's a BANANA SHORTAGE going on right now!

img.fark.netView Full Size

/Going Bananas
 
2018-02-08 05:20:43 PM  

wildcardjack: I'm sure I've read this story before. Last time around, the blame was corn prices were going up due to biofuel subsidies so farmers were planting corn instead of replanting agave.

Now the question has to be "have they met the max planting efficiency for this crop?" Also, would it still be tequilla if you start growing agave elsewhere?


Nope, they can't sell it as tequila if it's not made from that blue agave. Mexico and Europe agreed on that and made it so. Europe kind of had to, what with the whole champagne grapes thing.

But seriously, there are over 150 types of agave grown in different soil/climates, some are similar, this one is not.

The only reason I know that is around a year ago I had to figure out what foods were farkin with me. When I told the doc I couldn't eat potatoes or tomatoes anymore he spun around and said "It's the nightshade vegetables!" Those also include peppers and aloe (kissing cousins to agave). You'd be amazed how many food products that's in.
 
2018-02-08 05:30:11 PM  

Bathia_Mapes: Benevolent Misanthrope: Soooo, what you're saying is, bars won't be paying top dollar for limes to go with their tequila, so the price of limes at my local supermarket is going down?  Because I'm OK with that.

Wouldn't mind seeing lemon prices go down myself. Last time I was at the store they were $1 each.


You just need to shop around a little. Ugly, slightly smaller ones (at least in the midwest) are two for a dollar. They're not shiny, but that just means you can zest them without an extra helping of wax.

Limes though are a buck apiece.
 
2018-02-08 05:40:06 PM  
Mezcal is currently on the rise because of this.  They also take more risks with mezcal(mmm smokey mezcal) because tradition dictates tequila(just like Scotch vs Japanese whisky).
 
2018-02-08 06:24:52 PM  
The agave plant is a succulent. Succulent, don't you love that word? Sounds delicious and rude at the same time.

Beautiful, woody kind of word. Succulent.

Like one of the most beautiful words in the English language: sodomy.

Sodomy. Woody word. Not tinny at all.

Sodomy with a woody succulent.

Could it be more beautiful?

Please sodomize yourself with a woody succulent! What's not to love about that sentence.

Especially with Tequilla. Tequil-laaaaaaaaah!

Spanish is a beautiful language, like French, Portuguese Italian or Rumanian, all those Latin languages, really.

Tequila. Succelent woody tequila!

The worm is just an added bonus for macha and macho types. Woody.
 
2018-02-08 06:43:24 PM  
This is a repeat from the other day.  The reason is it takes 7-8 years to grow a mature agave that is good for tequila making.  They got super greedy and sold way too much and now all the plants are too young, and they're pulling these and trying to use them, so then there are NO plants left.  They were really stupid with the whole thing and now they are paying the price.  Oh well, I don't drink straight tequila and I can do without a day-glo green margarita.  Give me a Manhattan or Scotch on the rocks anyday.
 
2018-02-08 07:29:47 PM  

Lochaber_Axe: This is a repeat from the other day.  The reason is it takes 7-8 years to grow a mature agave that is good for tequila making.  They got super greedy and sold way too much and now all the plants are too young, and they're pulling these and trying to use them, so then there are NO plants left.  They were really stupid with the whole thing and now they are paying the price.  Oh well, I don't drink straight tequila and I can do without a day-glo green margarita.  Give me a Manhattan or Scotch on the rocks anyday.


It's interesting that you say they sold too much, as opposed to people drank too much, ain't it?
 
2018-02-08 07:44:06 PM  
Weird how they fail to mention the toll of a blight that has affected the blue agave. Read a few reports on that, seems to be the biggest problem. It's similar to the potato rot of Ireland in the 19th Century. They keep plating the same crop on the same soil for decades and bad things happen.

/ Rotate!
 
2018-02-08 08:38:02 PM  

CrazyCurt: Weird how they fail to mention the toll of a blight that has affected the blue agave. Read a few reports on that, seems to be the biggest problem. It's similar to the potato rot of Ireland in the 19th Century. They keep plating the same crop on the same soil for decades and bad things happen.

/ Rotate!


If you're talking about crown rot, that's the American agave.
 
2018-02-08 08:38:59 PM  

pheelix: Do you know the way to Mordor: lordargent: Bathia_Mapes: Benevolent Misanthrope:

A lemon party?

Till the juice runs down my leg.


I hear 'ya man......Right On!!
 
2018-02-08 08:47:02 PM  

dennysgod: Tequila only comes from Mexico so with Trump in office a price increase was inevitable so I've already been preparing.


Dang, you're pretty smart for a FARKer   ;-)
 
2018-02-08 09:32:06 PM  

squeeze my lemon: pheelix: Do you know the way to Mordor: lordargent: Bathia_Mapes: Benevolent Misanthrope:

A lemon party?

Till the juice runs down my leg.

I hear 'ya man......Right On!!


0_o
 
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