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(Yorkshire Post)   Call Of Duty n00bs can now hire 'professional' coaches to train them. And veterans can offer up their expertise - for a price   ( yorkshirepost.co.uk) divider line
    More: Weird, Duty Pro Players, Game, best online sharpshooters, Star Wars Battlefront, blockbuster gaming franchise, Coaching gaming service, strong wireless connection, Duty skills  
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677 clicks; posted to Geek » on 06 Feb 2018 at 11:05 AM (22 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2018-02-06 09:55:26 AM  
now
 
2018-02-06 10:03:46 AM  
I think this would technically make them eligible for VA benefits.

100% disabled for Carpal Tunnel and Cheetotosis.
 
2018-02-06 10:04:22 AM  
When I try to coach my wife on Uncharted she yells at me and makes me leave the room.
 
2018-02-06 10:05:26 AM  

FortyHams: When I try to coach my wife on Uncharted she yells at me and makes me leave the room.


If it makes you feel any better, I'm in the same boat.
 
2018-02-06 10:33:28 AM  
I need a Fortnite coach. I'm not sure how much longer I can take getting destroyed by some 8-year-old kid named DankNuGGz420bLaZe69fARt.
 
2018-02-06 10:38:16 AM  
just rekt some retard named sigdiamond2000 i ask him "does youre mom know your gay" and wile he was replying i shot him in the face was lit af lmao xD
 
2018-02-06 10:52:53 AM  
That's when you know you're a n00b: you need a coach to train you.  Unless you're going to be part of an E-sports CoD league, this is pathetic.

/Seriously
//just enjoy it for what it is
 
2018-02-06 11:01:08 AM  
It's not "weird". We do need a "Lame" tag though.
 
2018-02-06 11:04:00 AM  

Mike_LowELL: just rekt some retard named sigdiamond2000 i ask him "does youre mom know your gay" and wile he was replying i shot him in the face was lit af lmao xD


I was going to say "NO"!!! You didn't give me a chance to respond!
 
2018-02-06 11:06:53 AM  
All you need to know in CoD to be a successful player - knife in gun game.

There, I just saved you thousands.
 
2018-02-06 11:17:08 AM  
Since you can't coach twitch speed, I'm out on this one. But is there someone who can run the spreadsheets you need to take full advantage of the environmental effects combos in Divinity 2?

/I keed. Mostly.
// fun game. But i get tired of accidentally killing myself by healing with "decay" set.
 
2018-02-06 11:26:46 AM  
Turn off auto-aim and throw CoD in the trash and play PUBG?
 
2018-02-06 11:28:57 AM  
I miss Bushido Blade.

It was the best fighter I ever played.  There's something neat about one hit kills.
 
2018-02-06 11:32:34 AM  
I've had a hosted ARK server for just over a month. Just myself, my son, a few of our respective friends. After hunting/being hunted by dinosaurs, taming/riding them, I can't ever imagine going back to the CoD fark-fest. Played it for a lot of years, but I'm never going back to the unlock-the-guns fest. With or without a 'coach'.
 
2018-02-06 11:35:57 AM  

sigdiamond2000: Mike_LowELL: just rekt some retard named sigdiamond2000 i ask him "does youre mom know your gay" and wile he was replying i shot him in the face was lit af lmao xD

I was going to say "NO"!!! You didn't give me a chance to respond!


haha its chil my mom says the same thing all the time loll
 
2018-02-06 11:37:18 AM  
So.

It has come to this.
 
2018-02-06 11:37:45 AM  

JolobinSmokin: Turn off auto-aim and throw CoD in the trash and play PUBG?


Throw arena shopping simulator 2017 in the garbage and play outside
 
2018-02-06 11:38:21 AM  

Rwa2play: That's when you know you're a n00b: you need a coach to train you.  Unless you're going to be part of an E-sports CoD league, this is pathetic.

/Seriously
//just enjoy it for what it is


Friendly reminder that everyone who is better than you at videogames is a tryhard who needs to get a life. :^)

Oh, and everyone who I'm better than is complete garbage, it's like they don't even try, what the hell are they doing, lol.
 
2018-02-06 11:39:41 AM  
78.media.tumblr.comView Full Size
 
2018-02-06 11:40:44 AM  

JolobinSmokin: Turn off auto-aim and throw CoD in the trash and play PUBG?


why would you throw away one piece of garbage to just go ahead and pick up another?
 
2018-02-06 11:42:42 AM  
Some hot takes in this thread
 
2018-02-06 11:43:14 AM  

Plant Rights Activist: JolobinSmokin: Turn off auto-aim and throw CoD in the trash and play PUBG?

why would you throw away one piece of garbage to just go ahead and pick up another?


I'm sorry but PUBG is great.  100 people dropped in a zone with no weapons making everyone kinda equal for once. And not the kids who can log 10 hours a day having all the good weapons and no auto aim make it superior to most shooter games. Plus you don't have to do first person.
 
2018-02-06 11:45:25 AM  

DaStompa: JolobinSmokin: Turn off auto-aim and throw CoD in the trash and play PUBG?

Throw arena shopping simulator 2017 in the garbage and play outside


^ lol

Everyone point and laugh at the person who thinks both can't be done.
 
2018-02-06 11:45:59 AM  
After you learn the maps the only thing you need to learn is how to shoot your opponent in head first. No amount of coaching is going to fix your terrible reaction time.
 
2018-02-06 11:49:47 AM  
i0.kym-cdn.comView Full Size


i0.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2018-02-06 11:49:51 AM  

Mike_LowELL: Rwa2play: That's when you know you're a n00b: you need a coach to train you.  Unless you're going to be part of an E-sports CoD league, this is pathetic.

/Seriously
//just enjoy it for what it is

Friendly reminder that everyone who is better than you at videogames is a tryhard who needs to get a life. :^)

Oh, and everyone who I'm better than is complete garbage, it's like they don't even try, what the hell are they doing, lol.


I always picture anyone that cries about "try-hards" as part-time hourly employees, stuck in perpetual mediocrity. It takes a special someone to whine in public that someone else is trying harder than them, and somehow that makes the other person a bad guy/gal.
 
2018-02-06 11:50:18 AM  

gimlet: After you learn the maps the only thing you need to learn is how to shoot your opponent in head first. No amount of coaching is going to fix your terrible reaction time.


Yep.  Know the sweet spots on the map where it is hard to get snuck up on and where you can pick people off.  Also don't go Leroy Jenkins.
 
2018-02-06 11:53:45 AM  

gimlet: After you learn the maps the only thing you need to learn is how to shoot your opponent in head first. No amount of coaching is going to fix your terrible reaction time.


I liken these types of games to golf or skiing. Unless you start playing them when you're a kid, you are never, ever, ever going to be as good as someone who did.

Someone my age will never be as good at them because there simply weren't any games like it when we were kids.

These kids grew up playing Call of Duty. I grew up playing this:

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-06 11:54:19 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size


/have no idea if that applies to CoD
 
2018-02-06 11:56:33 AM  
Call Of Duty n00bs can now hire 'professional' coaches to train them. And veterans can offer up their expertise - for a price


That's what "hire" means, dumbass.
 
2018-02-06 11:57:04 AM  

doglover: I miss Bushido Blade.

It was the best fighter I ever played.  There's something neat about one hit kills.


Fighting games where you can end the fight with a single attack are the best kind.

This is why MMA is the ultimate 3D fighting game, up until guys start throwing kicks to the head.  I was blocking and he STILL knocked me out.  So cheap.  So dumb.
 
2018-02-06 11:58:32 AM  

Gleeman: [i0.kym-cdn.com image 490x448]

[i0.kym-cdn.com image 426x360]


A hero of the people right here.

Every time I go on a date, I ask them if they picked Hot Dogs over Hamburgers in the Splatfest.  If they say they did, I dump them on the spot.  Got no time for losers.
 
2018-02-06 12:02:51 PM  

dirkfunk: I always picture anyone that cries about "try-hards" as part-time hourly employees, stuck in perpetual mediocrity. It takes a special someone to whine in public that someone else is trying harder than them, and somehow that makes the other person a bad guy/gal.


The human ego is one hell of a self-defense mechanism.  It's what I tell myself every single day, because sex is for noobs, and I don't waste my time on the fe-males.
 
2018-02-06 12:05:45 PM  

sigdiamond2000: gimlet: After you learn the maps the only thing you need to learn is how to shoot your opponent in head first. No amount of coaching is going to fix your terrible reaction time.

I liken these types of games to golf or skiing. Unless you start playing them when you're a kid, you are never, ever, ever going to be as good as someone who did.

Someone my age will never be as good at them because there simply weren't any games like it when we were kids.

These kids grew up playing Call of Duty. I grew up playing this:

[img.fark.net image 480x360]


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-06 12:23:02 PM  

sigdiamond2000: gimlet: After you learn the maps the only thing you need to learn is how to shoot your opponent in head first. No amount of coaching is going to fix your terrible reaction time.

I liken these types of games to golf or skiing. Unless you start playing them when you're a kid, you are never, ever, ever going to be as good as someone who did.

Someone my age will never be as good at them because there simply weren't any games like it when we were kids.

These kids grew up playing Call of Duty. I grew up playing this:

[img.fark.net image 480x360]


They made that into a movie.

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-02-06 12:28:01 PM  

JolobinSmokin: DaStompa: JolobinSmokin: Turn off auto-aim and throw CoD in the trash and play PUBG?
Throw arena shopping simulator 2017 in the garbage and play outside
^ lol
Everyone point and laugh at the person who thinks both can't be done.


No, it would be pretty easy to throw both COD and arena shopping simulator 2017 in the garbage
 
2018-02-06 12:33:16 PM  

DaStompa: JolobinSmokin: DaStompa: JolobinSmokin: Turn off auto-aim and throw CoD in the trash and play PUBG?
Throw arena shopping simulator 2017 in the garbage and play outside
^ lol
Everyone point and laugh at the person who thinks both can't be done.

No, it would be pretty easy to throw both COD and arena shopping simulator 2017 in the garbage


^ hey look everyone. He came back to make an even dumber post.

Congratulations 🎈🎉🍾
 
2018-02-06 12:38:36 PM  
You could always join the army and play CoD as a LARP.
 
2018-02-06 12:46:47 PM  
Rwa2play

That's when you know you're a n00b: you need a coach to train you. Unless you're going to be part of an E-sports CoD league, this is pathetic.

/Seriously
//just enjoy it for what it is


This... people take games WAY too farking seriously. If you rage quit a game, then it is no longer a game because you aren't having fun.
 
2018-02-06 12:47:39 PM  
How exactly do you coach the human brain reaction time and twitch muscles?  Isn't the extent of the advice "Get Gud!"  Memorize maps and such is all fine and well but you don't need a coach to do that and ultimately it comes down to the ms between seeing a target on screen and having your finger respond.

Better to leave the stress behind and go play Skyrim or Fallout 4 or another massive single player game. Get your head beat in on XCOM long war or something where no matter the decision and perfect placement, you will still miss that 95% chance to hit.
 
2018-02-06 01:11:00 PM  

Short Victoria's War: /have no idea if that applies to CoD


Not what COD has become today.

The COD series used to be serious and tactical (EX, taking out a tank in COD2 took some coordinated teamwork). This was the case right up to modern warfare 1 (if you ignore the non Infinity Ward games, for the most part).

Now it has zombies and goofy gun skins and all of the accoutrements that come with it.

// From what I recall, it was a lot harder in COD2/3 to spam grenades or chuck grenades or get knife kills.
 
2018-02-06 01:36:44 PM  
Speaking from experience, what's good tactics in real life absolutely suck in CoD, unless you're a team and execute complicated maneuvers.

/101st Chairborne represent
 
2018-02-06 01:46:41 PM  
I haven't played a CoD since you could lean on PC. The last GREAT CoD.
 
2018-02-06 01:57:29 PM  
Whelp, back to Skyrim for me.
 
2018-02-06 02:01:02 PM  
People need coaches to play this?
CODBLOPS Cuba mission WITHOUT SHOOTING A GUN
Youtube RULv6HbgEjY
 
2018-02-06 02:03:50 PM  

doglover: I miss Bushido Blade.

It was the best fighter I ever played.  There's something neat about one hit kills.


Bushido Blade is fantastic.  That and Powerstone were my go-tos back in the day.

/I actually fired up my Dreamcast to play some Powerstone a few weeks ago - it's still awesome
//Might have to do some BB this weekend
 
2018-02-06 02:05:04 PM  

Copperbelly watersnake: Whelp, back to Skyrim for me.


You know a game is a success when people own it for 5 different systems.
 
2018-02-06 02:28:21 PM  

unicron702: Copperbelly watersnake: Whelp, back to Skyrim for me.

You know a game is a success when people own it for 5 different systems.


It's become the new DOOM in that you can install it on almost everything now.
 
2018-02-06 02:50:09 PM  

unicron702: Copperbelly watersnake: Whelp, back to Skyrim for me.

You know a game is a success when people own it for 5 different systems.


Saw that it's coming out for the Switch. I was all:

i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2018-02-06 03:22:36 PM  

Gleeman: unicron702: Copperbelly watersnake: Whelp, back to Skyrim for me.

You know a game is a success when people own it for 5 different systems.

Saw that it's coming out for the Switch. I was all:

[i.imgur.com image 640x603]


Meh, at that point you've already dumped $300 on a handheld with a docking station, what's another $60?

/Everyone I know with a Switch plays the handheld version of it only.  $5000 entertainment centers directly in front of them, never used with the Switch.  Blows my mind.
 
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