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156 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 03 Jan 2018 at 12:10 PM (27 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2018-01-03 12:09:37 PM  
I was able to get ~10K words down over Christmas break, which is good, but not as much as I'd hoped.  Also, I think a lot of it's going to be trimmed on rewrite, since for the majority of the time I had no idea where I was going--I had a gaping plot hole I had to figure out or nothing in the plot would make any sense.  I ended up just writing to see what would happen.  Then, on the last day I had free for work I figured it all out at once.

The problem was that a second character was to become the focus of the detective's investigation, but there was literally no way she could have been connected to what was going on.  In the first draft, he'd found her name scrawled on a whiteboard at a crime scene, which proved she had something to do with it; in this new draft he pulls her name out from random gibberish and assumes, in his mentally decaying state, that the random letters he was able to reorganize are an actual clue.  This means everything that's going on is inside his head--along with heavy drugs, alcohol and (potentially) a malevolent entity bent on bringing about his downfall.  He's not in good shape, is all I'm saying.

Anyway, I broke 50K words on the project, so I'm calling that a victory.  It looks like it should go to 70 or 80 on first draft now.

Thread title is in homage to today's Basic Instructions: How to Create a Plausible Superhero Origin Story and probably would have been more compelling if we could put exclamation points in headlines.
 
2018-01-03 12:26:45 PM  
I know I have written and had success having work put up on websites like https://365tomorrows.com/ , but does anyone know what other websites (or a good resource) are out there to get your name known as you work on your projects?
 
2018-01-03 12:57:42 PM  
howdy all. It's been awhile. Been trying to motivate myself to at least do the edits/rewrites my editor has suggested for book one. Damn gaming computer being addicting as balls...

it's a new year, maybe I'll find new motivation to kick myself into finally publishing this shiat
 
2018-01-03 01:15:06 PM  
Yesterday, I had writer's block so, I went with it...
 
2018-01-03 01:35:00 PM  
Big thanks to D_PaulAngel for sponsoring a month of TF for me. Writing has gone well since!
 
2018-01-03 02:19:39 PM  

somedude210: howdy all. It's been awhile. Been trying to motivate myself to at least do the edits/rewrites my editor has suggested for book one. Damn gaming computer being addicting as balls...

it's a new year, maybe I'll find new motivation to kick myself into finally publishing this shiat


I hope you do!
 
2018-01-03 02:28:53 PM  

D_PaulAngel: somedude210: howdy all. It's been awhile. Been trying to motivate myself to at least do the edits/rewrites my editor has suggested for book one. Damn gaming computer being addicting as balls...

it's a new year, maybe I'll find new motivation to kick myself into finally publishing this shiat

I hope you do!


thanks, I hope so too. I've tasked my editor to smack me into high gear if need be. self-imposed deadlines don't do it for me apparently. Maybe the threat of violence or removal of money would work...
 
2018-01-03 02:39:52 PM  
Thanks  to D_PaulAngel fopr the Totalfark. Now I can find more time to waste!
 
2018-01-03 02:49:24 PM  

writingdude: Big thanks to D_PaulAngel for sponsoring a month of TF for me. Writing has gone well since!


Yeah! I'm glad it helped :-)
 
2018-01-03 02:51:05 PM  

somedude210: D_PaulAngel: somedude210: howdy all. It's been awhile. Been trying to motivate myself to at least do the edits/rewrites my editor has suggested for book one. Damn gaming computer being addicting as balls...

it's a new year, maybe I'll find new motivation to kick myself into finally publishing this shiat

I hope you do!

thanks, I hope so too. I've tasked my editor to smack me into high gear if need be. self-imposed deadlines don't do it for me apparently. Maybe the threat of violence or removal of money would work...


If you need a final beta reading I'm happy to oblige! I enjoyed it and think it is, as the kids would say, timely AF.
 
2018-01-03 02:51:26 PM  

Khazar-Khum: Thanks  to D_PaulAngel fopr the Totalfark. Now I can find more time to waste!


You're welcome!
 
2018-01-03 02:54:01 PM  
I have sat down to write a review of Phasma, The Last Jedi, and a thoughts piece on my 2018 goals without actually managing to do shiat3 on any of them. Which is sadly ironic as one of my goals is to write more. But I'm almost done with my large work projects and Big home projects so... no more excuses! (That I can think of...)
 
2018-01-03 03:03:37 PM  

D_PaulAngel: somedude210: D_PaulAngel: somedude210: howdy all. It's been awhile. Been trying to motivate myself to at least do the edits/rewrites my editor has suggested for book one. Damn gaming computer being addicting as balls...

it's a new year, maybe I'll find new motivation to kick myself into finally publishing this shiat

I hope you do!

thanks, I hope so too. I've tasked my editor to smack me into high gear if need be. self-imposed deadlines don't do it for me apparently. Maybe the threat of violence or removal of money would work...

If you need a final beta reading I'm happy to oblige! I enjoyed it and think it is, as the kids would say, timely AF.


haha thanks. I may send you copy once the edits are done. The first few chapters have the most issues, namely because they were all written 10 years ago when my writing was sub par. It's just a daunting task that I don't want to go through.

and then there's the rape scene in book two I want/need to either rewrite or scrap entirely
 
2018-01-03 03:18:58 PM  

somedude210: D_PaulAngel: somedude210: D_PaulAngel: somedude210: howdy all. It's been awhile. Been trying to motivate myself to at least do the edits/rewrites my editor has suggested for book one. Damn gaming computer being addicting as balls...

it's a new year, maybe I'll find new motivation to kick myself into finally publishing this shiat

I hope you do!

thanks, I hope so too. I've tasked my editor to smack me into high gear if need be. self-imposed deadlines don't do it for me apparently. Maybe the threat of violence or removal of money would work...

If you need a final beta reading I'm happy to oblige! I enjoyed it and think it is, as the kids would say, timely AF.

haha thanks. I may send you copy once the edits are done. The first few chapters have the most issues, namely because they were all written 10 years ago when my writing was sub par. It's just a daunting task that I don't want to go through.

and then there's the rape scene in book two I want/need to either rewrite or scrap entirely


While I obviously haven't read it I'd say scrap it because I have read your other writings and I know that whatever is needed plotwise you can achieve without it.
 
2018-01-03 03:22:47 PM  

D_PaulAngel: somedude210: D_PaulAngel: somedude210: D_PaulAngel: somedude210: howdy all. It's been awhile. Been trying to motivate myself to at least do the edits/rewrites my editor has suggested for book one. Damn gaming computer being addicting as balls...

it's a new year, maybe I'll find new motivation to kick myself into finally publishing this shiat

I hope you do!

thanks, I hope so too. I've tasked my editor to smack me into high gear if need be. self-imposed deadlines don't do it for me apparently. Maybe the threat of violence or removal of money would work...

If you need a final beta reading I'm happy to oblige! I enjoyed it and think it is, as the kids would say, timely AF.

haha thanks. I may send you copy once the edits are done. The first few chapters have the most issues, namely because they were all written 10 years ago when my writing was sub par. It's just a daunting task that I don't want to go through.

and then there's the rape scene in book two I want/need to either rewrite or scrap entirely

While I obviously haven't read it I'd say scrap it because I have read your other writings and I know that whatever is needed plotwise you can achieve without it.


well, it kinda sets up a distraction for a betrayal...maybe I'll move it off-scene. Focus more on what's going on below them.
 
2018-01-03 04:17:38 PM  

somedude210: D_PaulAngel: somedude210: D_PaulAngel: somedude210: howdy all. It's been awhile. Been trying to motivate myself to at least do the edits/rewrites my editor has suggested for book one. Damn gaming computer being addicting as balls...

it's a new year, maybe I'll find new motivation to kick myself into finally publishing this shiat

I hope you do!

thanks, I hope so too. I've tasked my editor to smack me into high gear if need be. self-imposed deadlines don't do it for me apparently. Maybe the threat of violence or removal of money would work...

If you need a final beta reading I'm happy to oblige! I enjoyed it and think it is, as the kids would say, timely AF.

haha thanks. I may send you copy once the edits are done. The first few chapters have the most issues, namely because they were all written 10 years ago when my writing was sub par. It's just a daunting task that I don't want to go through.

and then there's the rape scene in book two I want/need to either rewrite or scrap entirely


Does it advance the story? May need to have its balls cut off.
 
2018-01-03 05:01:22 PM  
I won an award! What a great way to being 2018. My short horror story "Invisible" was cited in The Solstice List 2017 The Best Of Horror. The book it appeared in was also cited. That book is "Zippered Flesh 3: Yet More Tales Of Body Enhancements Gone Bad". If you like body horror, that's the book for you.

Here is the awards page:

https://www.facebook.com/notes/mina-r​o​os/the-solstice-list2017-the-best-of-h​orror/10155475263484565

Here's an Amazon link for the book:

https://www.amazon.com/ZIPPERED-FLESH​-​MORE-TALES-ENHANCEMENTS-ebook/dp/B076B​Y9ZBL/

I'm just delighted. I'm going to crack open some more champagne now. ;)
 
2018-01-03 05:12:16 PM  

Another Government Employee: Does it advance the story? May need to have its balls cut off.


DAMMIT STOP RUINING THE SCENE!

it's a tying up loose ends plotline.

Basically, ex-Mossad agent-turned weapons supplier sells out our band of rebels to the Russians. Unbeknownst to Mossad agent, German agent-who previously was an officer in the GRU/FSB is now working with the rebels. Offers to sell Mossad agent one of the lead rebels for information, deal goes down, Mossad agent's buddies have take rebel away to have way with them, while that goes on German enlightens Mossad agent as to his recent falling out with the Russians and a certain commissar. Broken glass upstairs, two thunks hit the floor, rebel sniper shows up at farmhouse a short time later to find a bound Mossad agent, kills Mossad agent, goes up stairs to make sure rebel is okay, finds two dead copatriots of Mossad agent, one missing a body part that was in use a short time before.

/scene
 
2018-01-03 05:19:23 PM  

ms_lara_croft: I won an award! What a great way to being 2018. My short horror story "Invisible" was cited in The Solstice List 2017 The Best Of Horror. The book it appeared in was also cited. That book is "Zippered Flesh 3: Yet More Tales Of Body Enhancements Gone Bad". If you like body horror, that's the book for you.

Here is the awards page:

https://www.facebook.com/notes/mina-ro​os/the-solstice-list2017-the-best-of-h​orror/10155475263484565

Here's an Amazon link for the book:

https://www.amazon.com/ZIPPERED-FLESH-​MORE-TALES-ENHANCEMENTS-ebook/dp/B076B​Y9ZBL/

I'm just delighted. I'm going to crack open some more champagne now. ;)


Congrats!  I'll check it out.
 
2018-01-03 05:40:31 PM  

toraque: ms_lara_croft: I won an award! What a great way to being 2018. My short horror story "Invisible" was cited in The Solstice List 2017 The Best Of Horror. The book it appeared in was also cited. That book is "Zippered Flesh 3: Yet More Tales Of Body Enhancements Gone Bad". If you like body horror, that's the book for you.

Here is the awards page:

https://www.facebook.com/notes/mina-ro​os/the-solstice-list2017-the-best-of-h​orror/10155475263484565

Here's an Amazon link for the book:

https://www.amazon.com/ZIPPERED-FLESH-​MORE-TALES-ENHANCEMENTS-ebook/dp/B076B​Y9ZBL/

I'm just delighted. I'm going to crack open some more champagne now. ;)

Congrats!  I'll check it out.


Thank you! Congrats to you on breaking 50K in your WIP. 10K is really quite good for over Christmas break.  Best to you on the writing project.
 
2018-01-03 06:14:56 PM  
I recently bought some land (paid for by my freelance journalism) and I'm interested in turning part of it into a writer's/artist's retreat. I was wondering if any Farkers might be interested in a month or three in scenic high desert country to finish their writing. I would be willing to let the right person stay for "free" in exchange for some good social media promotion, good reviews of my fledgling retreat.

About a year ago, I was looking at http://fundsforwriters.com/contests/​  for contests to enter, as a way of getting publicity/recognition. At first I was just looking for contests free to enter, not paying attention to the others. Later, I noticed one of the Grand Prizes was one month in a cottage in Ireland, with a $25 entry fee. I had already been looking at buying this undeveloped property, and thought adding a retreat would be an interesting way to help cover the mortgage, as well as showing gratitude to my Muse by giving back a little to other struggling artists.

My 40 acres is surrounded by BLM land, and the nearest neighbor is over a mile away. But a gas station/"Country Store" is just another mile further, and the WalMart is just six miles past that. It is the perfect combination of "Remote" and "Close to civilization." There is an Amtrak station in town, and a small airport with daily flights connecting to a major airport.

However, even Jack London would call this area cold during the winter, so I am waiting until spring to put in a septic tank and trailers, before building permanent structures. A ceramics kiln is next-ish in my plans, with some way to use its heat during the winter.

Is this something any Farkers might be interested in visiting to write or paint landscapes?
 
2018-01-04 01:04:08 AM  
I've been meaning to toss this up here for a few weeks now. This is the prologue to what I'm working on. Critiques are most welcome.

__________________________________

You know the thing I hate about killing the worst? No, it's not taking the life of another human being, stealing away their hopes and dreams, the visions for the future and the sorrow of their relatives, the dehumanization I have to put into pulling the trigger or slashing the knife or pressing the button. No, it's none of that.

It's the smell.

You see, what you don't see in the theater or at home on Netflix or read in those glamorized crime novels written by guys who hope to turn it into a screenplay is the f*cking smell. God it stinks.

And I'm not talking about the smell of a few days of decay, which is farking you're-gonna-puke type shiat, I'm talking about the medical fact that just about everyone pisses and sh*ts themselves when they die. It's a fact. Look it up. Or learn it the hard way, like I did. Consider yourself lucky, since no one bothered warning me about it.

And yeah, a lot of you are thinking "Dude, do you have any idea how many diapers I've changed in my life?" And I'm responding, yeah, you wiped the kid's ass and taped that diaper up and shoved that sh*t down the diaper genie, or maybe out your crossover SUV's window onto the Walmart parking lot if you're that kind of f*cking savage. You're not getting it. That ain't it by a damn sight. You're talking about your own baby's poop, which smells almost as good to you as your own farts. I'm talking about some asshole that eats crappy food and drinks a lot of beer, and instead of disposing of the diaper, the literal sh*t is sitting in the trunk of your car in the heat where the inexplicably osmatic membrane of the back seat blocks any semblance of the A/C's cool air to the trunk, yet permits every single f*cking ounce of the effluvients permanently assigned to the dearly departed's off-the-rack trousers to permeate throughout the cabin.

I mean, when the job's an assassination, you can plan ahead with some plastic wrap and duct tape that will mitigate this. When there's no one supposed to be there, though, plastic wrap and duct tape are not things you generally want to ride with, the Dubya administration's advice regarding chemical weapon attacks notwithstanding. Even the dumbest cop knows that's bullsh*t.

So yeah, I know what you're thinking. Here I am, telling you about how much it sucks to ride around in sweltering heat with a sh*t-covered stiff in the trunk, and how an assassin should carry around chemical weapon mitigation supplies. I must be a hitman, right? Hell to the no. I don't kill people. Except for a few times. And I don't get paid for it, except, I had to. But I never accepted any kind of job where I was supposed to kill someone. It just happened. I'm not a hired assassin or any of that crap. I just think that hindsight says riding around with a f*cking rotting stiff in your trunk stinking up the place f*cking sucks, and maybe it's worth the risk to haul around the f*cking plastic wrap and duct tape. And a few of those pine scented air freshener thingies you hang from the rearview mirror even though that's technically illegal in most states as it supposedly obscures your vision or some sh*t.

No. I'm not that guy. I'm a farking bum. I'm a loser.

I'm also one of Wikipedia's top editors, which means I get to read. A lot. About pretty much EVERYTHING. So I guess there are worse people who could have had what happened to me happen to them. I guess.

So what happened was this:
 
2018-01-04 11:58:57 AM  
D_PaulAngel:

Thanks for the Total Fark!
 
2018-01-04 12:04:54 PM  
I just started editing a new anthology for the HP Lovecraft Lunatic Asylum and I have to write a story for their next one, which is themed erotic Deep Ones/Soulmates.

Trying to finish the Kindle version of my 2018 calendar.  I sell like 5 kindle copies a year, I'm not sure why I bother.

On the accident front, I'm supposed to be getting an MRI soon on my knee.  It's like a hot spike behind my kneecap.

There's a guy on Facebook looking for long Cthulhu mythos stories, if anyone is interested.  I'll post a screenshot.
 
2018-01-04 12:08:05 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-01-04 12:09:44 PM  
He is @thatcthulhuguy on twitter
 
2018-01-04 05:40:29 PM  
Spawn_of_Cthulhu: There's a guy on Facebook looking for long Cthulhu mythos stories, if anyone is interested.  I'll post a screenshot.

Username checks out.

Thank you for posting - this is relevant to my interests.

When I was in 6th grade they released the first version of D&D'd Deities & Demigods, which briefly included both Cthulhu and Elric/Melnibone mythos, my first exposure to each. Since I was pale and scrawny, my buddy insisted on calling me Elric for several years. (Also, I had a magic talking word - but that's another story)

As years passed, and I finished my Journalism degree, I started researching an article for a free weekly paper in Sonoma County (where Jack London state park is located) about Jack London's forgotten sci-fi writing. As a long-shot, I tried contacting various famous sci-fi writers for quotes through their publishing companies, etc. and was pleased that two f them responded, Norman Spinrad and Michael Moorcock. They both gave great quotes for my article.

About a month ago I released my articles as a FREE ebook, and a couple weeks later I got a Facebook "Friends Request" from Michael Moorcock. Still awaiting contact from HP Lovecraft...

Anyway, without diminishing SPAWN's contribution, and with respectful gratitude, I thought I would add the specific criteria for this Cthulhu anthology. Thanks again for bringing is to my attention!
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-01-04 06:06:43 PM  

Spice Must Flow: Spawn_of_Cthulhu: There's a guy on Facebook looking for long Cthulhu mythos stories, if anyone is interested.  I'll post a screenshot.

Username checks out.

Thank you for posting - this is relevant to my interests.

When I was in 6th grade they released the first version of D&D'd Deities & Demigods, which briefly included both Cthulhu and Elric/Melnibone mythos, my first exposure to each. Since I was pale and scrawny, my buddy insisted on calling me Elric for several years. (Also, I had a magic talking word - but that's another story)

As years passed, and I finished my Journalism degree, I started researching an article for a free weekly paper in Sonoma County (where Jack London state park is located) about Jack London's forgotten sci-fi writing. As a long-shot, I tried contacting various famous sci-fi writers for quotes through their publishing companies, etc. and was pleased that two f them responded, Norman Spinrad and Michael Moorcock. They both gave great quotes for my article.

About a month ago I released my articles as a FREE ebook, and a couple weeks later I got a Facebook "Friends Request" from Michael Moorcock. Still awaiting contact from HP Lovecraft...

Anyway, without diminishing SPAWN's contribution, and with respectful gratitude, I thought I would add the specific criteria for this Cthulhu anthology. Thanks again for bringing is to my attention!
[img.fark.net image 494x211]


Cool!  I might be one of the editors of the series, waiting to hear back.   ~(;,,;)~
 
2018-01-04 09:52:13 PM  
Still unable to complete and/or publish a single f**king thing.  Grand total of short stories in various stages of total, near, or incipient failure:  21.

Please just kill me.
 
2018-01-05 12:11:09 AM  

Spawn_of_Cthulhu: D_PaulAngel:

Thanks for the Total Fark!


You're welcome!
 
2018-01-05 12:23:44 AM  

ox45tallboy: I've been meaning to toss this up here for a few weeks now. This is the prologue to what I'm working on. Critiques are most welcome.

__________________________________

You know the thing I hate about killing the worst? No, it's not taking the life of another human being, stealing away their hopes and dreams, the visions for the future and the sorrow of their relatives, the dehumanization I have to put into pulling the trigger or slashing the knife or pressing the button. No, it's none of that.

It's the smell.

You see, what you don't see in the theater or at home on Netflix or read in those glamorized crime novels written by guys who hope to turn it into a screenplay is the f*cking smell. God it stinks.

And I'm not talking about the smell of a few days of decay, which is farking you're-gonna-puke type shiat, I'm talking about the medical fact that just about everyone pisses and sh*ts themselves when they die. It's a fact. Look it up. Or learn it the hard way, like I did. Consider yourself lucky, since no one bothered warning me about it.

And yeah, a lot of you are thinking "Dude, do you have any idea how many diapers I've changed in my life?" And I'm responding, yeah, you wiped the kid's ass and taped that diaper up and shoved that sh*t down the diaper genie, or maybe out your crossover SUV's window onto the Walmart parking lot if you're that kind of f*cking savage. You're not getting it. That ain't it by a damn sight. You're talking about your own baby's poop, which smells almost as good to you as your own farts. I'm talking about some asshole that eats crappy food and drinks a lot of beer, and instead of disposing of the diaper, the literal sh*t is sitting in the trunk of your car in the heat where the inexplicably osmatic membrane of the back seat blocks any semblance of the A/C's cool air to the trunk, yet permits every single f*cking ounce of the effluvients permanently assigned to the dearly departed's off-the-rack trousers to permeate throughout the cabin.

I mean, when the job's an assassination, you can plan ahead with some plastic wrap and duct tape that will mitigate this. When there's no one supposed to be there, though, plastic wrap and duct tape are not things you generally want to ride with, the Dubya administration's advice regarding chemical weapon attacks notwithstanding. Even the dumbest cop knows that's bullsh*t.

So yeah, I know what you're thinking. Here I am, telling you about how much it sucks to ride around in sweltering heat with a sh*t-covered stiff in the trunk, and how an assassin should carry around chemical weapon mitigation supplies. I must be a hitman, right? Hell to the no. I don't kill people. Except for a few times. And I don't get paid for it, except, I had to. But I never accepted any kind of job where I was supposed to kill someone. It just happened. I'm not a hired assassin or any of that crap. I just think that hindsight says riding around with a f*cking rotting stiff in your trunk stinking up the place f*cking sucks, and maybe it's worth the risk to haul around the f*cking plastic wrap and duct tape. And a few of those pine scented air freshener thingies you hang from the rearview mirror even though that's technically illegal in most states as it supposedly obscures your vision or some sh*t.

No. I'm not that guy. I'm a farking bum. I'm a loser.

I'm also one of Wikipedia's top editors, which means I get to read. A lot. About pretty much EVERYTHING. So I guess there are worse people who could have had what happened to me happen to them. I guess.

So what happened was this:


Well I'm certainly intrigued! I was a bit confused though because the shift for on I'm a hit man to not a hit man didn't make a lot of sense to me. It seemed too abrupt and disconnected. I think if you can smooth that out it'll make for a nice start.
 
2018-01-05 12:24:34 AM  

Spawn_of_Cthulhu: [img.fark.net image 425x367][img.fark.net image 425x550]


That sounds cool, thanks for the info.
 
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