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(CBS News)   So, after I win tonight's Powerball drawing, take my third of a billion dollars, pay all the taxes and buy TotalFark for everyone, ... what then?   ( cbsnews.com) divider line
    More: Misc, Mega Millions, Lottery, Powerball, Mega Millions jackpot, South Dakota Lottery, Mega Millions ticket, New Hampshire Lottery, cash option  
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369 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 27 Dec 2017 at 2:20 PM (28 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2017-12-27 11:44:59 AM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2017-12-27 11:49:19 AM  
Find a financial planner who can also help you disappear because people you haven't seen in 40 years are going to find you and want to be your best friend.
 
2017-12-27 11:49:46 AM  

naughtyrev: [i.imgur.com image 500x340][View Full Size image _x_]


Forgot the hookers.
 
2017-12-27 11:49:50 AM  
Drew 2018!!!!
 
2017-12-27 11:52:06 AM  
Buy yourself a pet politician. All the rich folks are doing it.
 
2017-12-27 11:53:42 AM  
GOP congressmen will be super cheap in 2018.
 
2017-12-27 11:54:04 AM  

JohnnyApocalypse: Drew 2018!!!!


Combining your post with mine, how much bourbon do you think it would take to influence his position on various issues?
 
2017-12-27 11:58:21 AM  

clancifer: GOP congressmen will be super cheap in 2018.


Bonus points if you can get them to denounce Trump, Nazis, and Evangelicals.
 
2017-12-27 12:06:47 PM  
Buy ad space on every TV network where you silently show the entire country your balls for 30 seconds.

Then run for office.
 
2017-12-27 12:12:40 PM  
tfwiki.netView Full Size
 
2017-12-27 12:24:06 PM  
Call hbo and pay them to overdub the next season of game of thrones in Swahili and have that be the only version available in the us
 
2017-12-27 01:10:29 PM  
Total Fark for everyone? pfffffffffffffffffffft!  Start your own Fark, with blackjack and hookers.
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-12-27 02:15:12 PM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: Find a financial planner who can also help you disappear because people you haven't seen in 40 years are going to find you and want to be your best friend.


Better yet, get a good lawyer, don't tell anybody you won, collect the money as a LLC or something that leaves you somewhat anonymous.

And then , yeah hookers and blow
 
2017-12-27 02:24:04 PM  
Buy 4chan and delete /pol/
 
2017-12-27 02:34:19 PM  

Mr.Tangent: Total Fark for everyone? pfffffffffffffffffffft!  Start your own Fark, with blackjack and hookers.[img.fark.net image 287x400][View Full Size image _x_]


Forget the blackjack and the hookers. Just bring back the boobies.

/I miss the old days, when any thread could go off the rails into Posting Hot Redheads Ravine.
 
2017-12-27 02:36:28 PM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: Find a financial planner who can also help you disappear because people you haven't seen in 40 years are going to find you and want to be your best friend.


Whenever the last time the Powerball was stupid high, Mrs. Comic Book Guy and I figured we'd fly in the Emirates Suite to Australia and fark off there for a little bit until things settled down back home.
 
2017-12-27 02:46:17 PM  
Send me just one million dollars, and I'll never bother you again.
 
2017-12-27 02:48:14 PM  
Buy yourself a walled compound in northern MN, post signs saying "This property protected by Smith & Wesson" and never speak to anyone again. That's what I'd do.
 
2017-12-27 02:56:36 PM  

Merltech: naughtyrev: [i.imgur.com image 500x340][View Full Size image _x_]

Forgot the hookers.


That what the bear is for.
 
2017-12-27 03:00:11 PM  
Personally, I'm working on a few models of highly impact-resistant "drones" (basically two wheels with a science package, a camera and a big hammer holding them together) with a base site and sphero-ish data repeaters.  I know that the lag will be hell, but it'll be a game where you get to run around with these things, kind of like a FPS game, controlling them from your phone.

The hammer gets used as a sort of pogo stick, to jump away from enemies, while also providing seismic data that gets sent back to the base site.  The science package includes basic things like a thermometer, GPS or dead reckoning, and a vacuum, to grab dust samples, and also should be able to be used as the collection end of a seismometer.  All of this information gets transmitted to the repeaters, and ultimately to the base.

The base will provide the next level of data gathering equipment, which can sort samples (returned from drones when you "take the base" or have to get home to recharge) for either on site analysis or for storage until the location-tagged samples can be analyzed at a later date, provide solar power for recharging the drones, and provide a "capture the flag" type target.

Everything would be mapped, catalogged and forwarded back to earth for further analyses.

I figure you could do all of this on the earth-facing side of the moon, to provide an uninterrupted data stream, as well as being able to physically point up at the sky and "see" where your game is being played.  It would cost a dollar per play (well, at least to get in line to play), your turn would be over as soon as you got "hit", and you'd only have a 15-minute window of opportunity when your phone was pinged to start playing your turn, before it gets passed onto the next player.

I've got more details, but I'm not going to share them here (yet).  Obviously, if I can get some other form of backing to do this, I'd love it, but I'm assuming it'll take PowerBall-magnitude winnings for me to ever get this (literally) off the ground.  I think it might be difficult to get a GoFundMe to pay for this...

/too much time on my hands
//always play PowerBall!
///is the magic number
 
2017-12-27 03:00:34 PM  
Oh, also hookers and blackjack.
 
2017-12-27 03:03:16 PM  
Buy a place in Aspen, CO. There, you'll be just another regular, old, lowly millionaire. Much easier to just blend in.

'Yeah, sorry, this club is for Billionaires only... that's right, with a 'B'... I'm gonna have to ask you to go ahead and stay behind that rope over there, m'kay?'
 
2017-12-27 03:03:24 PM  
Hire a good accountant. Pay off your home, pay off your parents and siblings homes (if you like them).  Move to Norway.
 
2017-12-27 03:11:25 PM  
Buy the Cleveland Browns.

Fire everyone.

Field a team of trained Chimpanzees.

You'll have a more competitive team and recoup your investment in no time after you convince the city to build you a new stadium funded entirely by taxpayers where you control all concessions, parking, and merchandise revenue.

Plus, you'll have a team of football playing Chimpanzees.
 
2017-12-27 03:21:09 PM  
togaman2k:
Plus, you'll have a team of football playing Chimpanzees.


But enough about the Packers
 
2017-12-27 03:23:08 PM  

togaman2k: Buy the Cleveland Browns.

Fire everyone.

Field a team of trained Chimpanzees.

You'll have a more competitive team and recoup your investment in no time after you convince the city to build you a new stadium funded entirely by taxpayers where you control all concessions, parking, and merchandise revenue.

Plus, you'll have a team of football playing Chimpanzees.


NFL?  Please, you can't even get an MLS team if you don't have more than a few billion...
http://sacramento.cbslocal.com/2017/1​2​/21/sacramento-republic-billionaires-n​eeded/

/Chief investor only sold his business for $2 billion, clearly not enough for the rarified air of being an owner.
 
2017-12-27 03:23:36 PM  
slh.comView Full Size

Of course, if you don't want to go, send me half and I'll go instead.
 
2017-12-27 03:28:48 PM  
An actual answer?

decide how much you want to live on per year, like a salary, and put the amount you need into a simple Vanguard index fund.  $1 million will generally return $70K per year, give or take.  A little more to ride out a bad year or three.  Another $1 million for retirement.  Maybe some more for kids' college funds.  Now you can work if you want, or not, but you didn't sink it into some idiotic restaurant and go broke after 3 years.

The rest is mad money and charity.

Or setup a super PAC and work to take down some of the worst people in politics, or support the un-lobbied but popular positions.
 
2017-12-27 03:33:59 PM  
I always wanted a private DC-10 for my favorite few friends, air stewards, private pilots, etc.  Then we could just chase spring around the world.  Who doesn't like spring - everyone everywhere would be in a good mood, fresh air, sunshine, etc.
 
2017-12-27 03:40:19 PM  
productivity_zero:   ... GPS or dead reckoning, and a vacuum, to grab dust samples...

...I figure you could do all of this on the earth-facing side of the moon...


Think about this for a second.  I'll wait.
 
2017-12-27 04:03:13 PM  
I'd build my dream garage and buy a local shopping center and put in a maker space so that I had someplace to tinker
 
2017-12-27 04:05:35 PM  
It will actually be about $130 million after taxes (depending on if your state and local tax laws). If you do win do this. If you follow these instructions, you'll have a much better chance of avoiding what happens to a lot of lottery winners.
 
2017-12-27 04:19:14 PM  
Forget Fark - you should buy this:

The foobies.com domain is for sale. Contact us for more info.
Along with:
foobies.net
foobies.org
foobies.biz
foobies.info
foobies.name
foobies.tv
foobies.us
totalfoobies.net
totalfoobies.org
totalfoobies.biz
totalfoobies.info
totalfoobies.name
totalfoobies.tv
totalfoobies.us
totalfoobies.cn
totalfoobies.co.uk

/Free Foobies for all!
 
2017-12-27 04:38:49 PM  
Hookers and blow...

The answer is always hookers and blow. It should actually come before the whole "taxes" and "TF for everyone" part.
 
2017-12-27 04:40:49 PM  

Meat's dream: productivity_zero:   ... GPS or dead reckoning, and a vacuum, to grab dust samples...

...I figure you could do all of this on the earth-facing side of the moon...

Think about this for a second.  I'll wait.


Two seconds.
 
2017-12-27 04:42:53 PM  
Here's what you do, subby. Start a pornography business starring yourself and whoever you want to fark for a piddling X-amount of money that is now meaningless to you.
 
2017-12-27 04:54:10 PM  
1. Lawyer
2. Wealth Management
3. CPA to keep check on #2
4. A skywriting company to leave messages for D2S.
 
2017-12-27 04:54:19 PM  
Out lotteries here in Canada are tax free.  That is one advantage.  However, they never really amount to the size they become in the states and one of them, the Lotto Max, stops at $60 Million.  That's something I agree with.
Here in Quebec they stopped publishing last names on the lottery advertising that shows your picture.  I'm not sure it it's the same when you win a huge prize (there is generally a press conference).  I remember one time two years ago when a giant LED billboard on a local road showed a picture of an entire family that shared a huge prize.  It didn't last long after that. It's not the kind of publicity you want if you win a huge prize.
If I won the grand prize I would make immediate plans to leave the province.  I'm not sure I would go anywhere else in Canada though.  We are in the middle of a deep freeze and it's a complete drag.   Don't laugh though, I would consider a summer home in the Ottawa area.  I love that part of Canada.
 
2017-12-27 05:25:07 PM  

basicstock: Out lotteries here in Canada are tax free.  That is one advantage.  However, they never really amount to the size they become in the states and one of them, the Lotto Max, stops at $60 Million.  That's something I agree with.
Here in Quebec they stopped publishing last names on the lottery advertising that shows your picture.  I'm not sure it it's the same when you win a huge prize (there is generally a press conference).  I remember one time two years ago when a giant LED billboard on a local road showed a picture of an entire family that shared a huge prize.  It didn't last long after that. It's not the kind of publicity you want if you win a huge prize.
If I won the grand prize I would make immediate plans to leave the province.  I'm not sure I would go anywhere else in Canada though.  We are in the middle of a deep freeze and it's a complete drag.   Don't laugh though, I would consider a summer home in the Ottawa area.  I love that part of Canada.


Do like this guy in China did after winning $17 million...

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-12-27 05:48:06 PM  
Were it me, after doing as much as I could to claim the money without revealing who I am, I would obviously want to put a healthy amount in some safe investments that also would keep me from being overly spendy.  But nobody wants to read about being responsible with money.  fark that.

I'd get out of my current neighborhood quick.  Probably get a couple of decent places to live, but I don't do flashy homes.  Then I'd start indulging in my love of cars.  Specifically, I'd like one of these:

img.fark.netView Full Size

As selection may be limited, I may need to repaint.  Aside from that, I'd pay some people to keep it looking as close to stock as I could while upgrading the engine to be cleaner (probably swap in new engine and matching transmission with modern emissions, etc.) and brakes to stop quicker.  I would likely need to put in seat belts and similar.  Basically, it'd get made over into THE great road trip car.  Once that project was completed, I'd take some time on the open road.  Make myself hard to reach for a bit.
 
2017-12-27 05:49:13 PM  
Considering MegaMillions recently doubled its price and made the odds somehow worse, between the two big lotteries, we'll probably see these size jackpots all the time now. Would be better if they just improved the odds and had more people winning money instead of a few obscenely rich winners a few times a year.
 
2017-12-27 05:53:18 PM  

Myk-House of El: Were it me, after doing as much as I could to claim the money without revealing who I am, I would obviously want to put a healthy amount in some safe investments that also would keep me from being overly spendy.  But nobody wants to read about being responsible with money.  fark that.

I'd get out of my current neighborhood quick.  Probably get a couple of decent places to live, but I don't do flashy homes.  Then I'd start indulging in my love of cars.  Specifically, I'd like one of these:

[img.fark.net image 850x569][View Full Size image _x_]
As selection may be limited, I may need to repaint.  Aside from that, I'd pay some people to keep it looking as close to stock as I could while upgrading the engine to be cleaner (probably swap in new engine and matching transmission with modern emissions, etc.) and brakes to stop quicker.  I would likely need to put in seat belts and similar.  Basically, it'd get made over into THE great road trip car.  Once that project was completed, I'd take some time on the open road.  Make myself hard to reach for a bit.


A beautiful automobile!
 
2017-12-27 05:55:41 PM  
Depending on the size of the pot, after I had myself and everyone I love set for life, I set the rest into a trust generating revenue.

It would be directed towards generating at least 70k a year for as many people below the poverty line as I possibly could. Free and clear for life. The only thing I would ask is they add to the pot to help more people if they ever exceed the 70k. Totally optional.
 
2017-12-27 05:58:35 PM  
Legally change your name to Donald J. Trump and start your own verified Twitter feed.
 
2017-12-27 06:37:11 PM  
I would buy an electronic billboard, one I can update from my mobile device.

The following people can kiss my ass . . .


/ Soccer mom, blue Lexus, I-65 North, left lane.
 
2017-12-27 07:14:09 PM  
Hookers and blow.
 
2017-12-27 07:17:42 PM  

basicstock: Myk-House of El: Were it me, after doing as much as I could to claim the money without revealing who I am, I would obviously want to put a healthy amount in some safe investments that also would keep me from being overly spendy.  But nobody wants to read about being responsible with money.  fark that.

I'd get out of my current neighborhood quick.  Probably get a couple of decent places to live, but I don't do flashy homes.  Then I'd start indulging in my love of cars.  Specifically, I'd like one of these:

[img.fark.net image 850x569][View Full Size image _x_]
As selection may be limited, I may need to repaint.  Aside from that, I'd pay some people to keep it looking as close to stock as I could while upgrading the engine to be cleaner (probably swap in new engine and matching transmission with modern emissions, etc.) and brakes to stop quicker.  I would likely need to put in seat belts and similar.  Basically, it'd get made over into THE great road trip car.  Once that project was completed, I'd take some time on the open road.  Make myself hard to reach for a bit.

A beautiful automobile!


I'm told a great-great aunt of mine got one new.  She was definitely better off than the rest of the family, that car cost $10K new in 1956 and was at the time considered a rival for the Rolls Royce and Bentley of the era.  It's stylish and lacks the obscene amounts of chrome many vehicles of the same era had.  But the main thing is that it at this point it seems like just a particularly nice car from the 1950s and people would be curious about it.
 
2017-12-27 09:56:33 PM  

WelldeadLink: Meat's dream: productivity_zero:   ... GPS or dead reckoning, and a vacuum, to grab dust samples...

...I figure you could do all of this on the earth-facing side of the moon...

Think about this for a second.  I'll wait.

Two seconds.


What am I thinking about for a second or two? I'm assuming it would take far fewer sattelites, since the moon is much smaller than the earth, and I'm only looking at doing this for one side of the moon, so you wouldn't even need that many (right?).  Hell, you could just have lasers or microwaves (beacons) at different points on the earth that would provide much of the same information, right?

I'm an engineer, not a physicist, though, so I'd pay someone else to figure out this for me.
 
2017-12-27 10:01:28 PM  

productivity_zero: Personally, I'm working on a few models of highly impact-resistant "drones" (basically two wheels with a science package, a camera and a big hammer holding them together) with a base site and sphero-ish data repeaters.  I know that the lag will be hell, but it'll be a game where you get to run around with these things, kind of like a FPS game, controlling them from your phone.

The hammer gets used as a sort of pogo stick, to jump away from enemies, while also providing seismic data that gets sent back to the base site.  The science package includes basic things like a thermometer, GPS or dead reckoning, and a vacuum, to grab dust samples, and also should be able to be used as the collection end of a seismometer.  All of this information gets transmitted to the repeaters, and ultimately to the base.

The base will provide the next level of data gathering equipment, which can sort samples (returned from drones when you "take the base" or have to get home to recharge) for either on site analysis or for storage until the location-tagged samples can be analyzed at a later date, provide solar power for recharging the drones, and provide a "capture the flag" type target.

Everything would be mapped, catalogged and forwarded back to earth for further analyses.

I figure you could do all of this on the earth-facing side of the moon, to provide an uninterrupted data stream, as well as being able to physically point up at the sky and "see" where your game is being played.  It would cost a dollar per play (well, at least to get in line to play), your turn would be over as soon as you got "hit", and you'd only have a 15-minute window of opportunity when your phone was pinged to start playing your turn, before it gets passed onto the next player.

I've got more details, but I'm not going to share them here (yet).  Obviously, if I can get some other form of backing to do this, I'd love it, but I'm assuming it'll take PowerBall-magnitude winnings for me to ever get this (literally) off the ground.  I think it might be difficult to get a GoFundMe to pay for this...

/too much time on my hands
//always play PowerBall!
///is the magic number


I was thinking about hiring an animal trainer to teach several monkeys to use paintball guns. These can be used in an enclosed compound for various different entertaining activities. As a bonus, should the shirt hit the fan, you can lock yourself in a bunker and remotely open the live weapons locker next to the paintball gun locker.
 
2017-12-27 10:38:04 PM  
productivity_zero:

What am I thinking about for a second or two? I'm assuming it would take far fewer sattelites, since the moon is much smaller than the earth, and I'm only looking at doing this for one side of the moon, so you wouldn't even need that many (right?).  Hell, you could just have lasers or microwaves (beacons) at different points on the earth that would provide much of the same information, right?

I'm an engineer, not a physicist, though, so I'd pay someone else to figure out this for me.


I'm no engineer, and couldn't tell you much about GPS beyond what's on Wikipedia, but replicating GPS on another body is no small feat.  But say you can.  How exactly are vacuums going to work in a place with no air?
 
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