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(SFGate)   Pets.com, Jawbone, Juicero, R.I.P   ( sfgate.com) divider line
    More: Amusing  
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2415 clicks; posted to Business » on 20 Nov 2017 at 8:20 PM (30 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



43 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2017-11-20 02:34:43 PM  
Rest in peace, Tieclasp.com, Pimentoloaf.com, and eSocks.com.

E-Trade Chimp On a Horse TV Commercial
Youtube ONZFkqzuMjI


/and you rest in peace as well, Iron Eyes Cody
 
2017-11-20 05:19:16 PM  
Digg.
 
2017-11-20 08:29:29 PM  
Wasn't jawbone that higher-end bluetooth heatset?  Those seemed like a solid piece of tech gear.  Filtered environmental noise from calls rather well.  A bit goofy/unwarranted-self-importance-look​ing aside from that, but otherwise quite useful

/bmw m3 sold separately, batteries not included
 
2017-11-20 08:29:34 PM  
 
2017-11-20 08:34:38 PM  
This would've been funny if they'd published it the day after Halloween.

Oh wait, they did.

/old news is so exciting
//hey, remember excite.com?
 
2017-11-20 08:34:49 PM  
F'd Company used to be a favorite read of mine during the crash in 2000.
Always entertaining to watch some of the once touted niche companies slowly crash into reality.
No Pinksquirrel.com, you should not have spent $30M on your launch party. You ran out of funding 3 months later.
 
2017-11-20 08:36:22 PM  
Not for nothin' but dealing with chewy.com is a delight. They don't pay me to say that, I'm just a fan.
 
2017-11-20 09:04:19 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size


no, no you won't
 
2017-11-20 09:06:14 PM  
news.bbc.co.ukView Full Size


What Bitcoin looked like in the 90s.
 
2017-11-20 09:13:24 PM  
Juicero can rot in hell with Charles Manson.
 
2017-11-20 09:18:16 PM  
no Pen Island? yall slippin
 
2017-11-20 09:21:44 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size


RIP JuiceBro
 
2017-11-20 09:59:54 PM  

Dead for Tax Reasons: [img.fark.net image 496x200]

no, no you won't


I still have a t shirt of theirs that I got in college.

/lawn, off it
 
2017-11-20 10:02:16 PM  

ar393: Dead for Tax Reasons: [img.fark.net image 496x200]

no, no you won't

I still have a t shirt of theirs that I got in college.

/lawn, off it


i found some magnets and a metro card with them on it when i went through some college stuff recently
 
2017-11-20 10:11:22 PM  
As long as klout.com is not on that list, there is no Justice in the world
 
2017-11-20 10:12:15 PM  
TFA clearly shows ten of the joke gravestones. How does the author of TFA describe it? "Nearly a dozen". Why would they not just say ten?
 
2017-11-20 10:16:21 PM  

Marksrevenge: TFA clearly shows ten of the joke gravestones. How does the author of TFA describe it? "Nearly a dozen". Why would they not just say ten?


Two more words of copy.
 
2017-11-20 10:17:03 PM  
Juicero deserved to perish while staked over a nest of fire ants.
 
2017-11-20 10:25:52 PM  

Marksrevenge: TFA clearly shows ten of the joke gravestones. How does the author of TFA describe it? "Nearly a dozen". Why would they not just say ten?


if a baker's dozen is 13, maybe a subby's dozen is 10
 
2017-11-20 10:26:02 PM  
i was really annoyed by the death of SOLS. Their products were awesome, but apparently their management was not.

/3D printed custom orthotics
 
2017-11-20 10:34:57 PM  
BOLTR: Juicero, Cold Press Juicer for Rich Weirdos
Youtube _Cp-BGQfpHQ


The only proper review of Juicero.
 
2017-11-20 10:38:24 PM  

Dead for Tax Reasons: Marksrevenge: TFA clearly shows ten of the joke gravestones. How does the author of TFA describe it? "Nearly a dozen". Why would they not just say ten?

if a baker's dozen is 13, maybe a subby's dozen is 10


If they're defining a dozen as ten, they wouldn't call a group of ten things "nearly a dozen". I kinda want to whack the author with a rolled up newspaper.
 
2017-11-20 10:43:45 PM  

Catlenfell: F'd Company used to be a favorite read of mine during the crash in 2000.
Always entertaining to watch some of the once touted niche companies slowly crash into reality.
No Pinksquirrel.com, you should not have spent $30M on your launch party. You ran out of funding 3 months later.


So many things we remember as spectacular failures were extremely similar to later successes, except for some minor detail or being ahead of their time.

For instance:
https://www.purplesquirrel.io/
 
2017-11-20 11:06:16 PM  

arcgear: Wasn't jawbone that higher-end bluetooth heatset?


Headsets and earpieces, and they were one of the top tier brands in those product categories.

They have also been in business since 1999, so they don't really belong in the same group as juicero. They sold quality products that people wanted, at a fair price.

// the problem is that people aren't really buying bluetooth headsets for phones anymore. Phone mic and speaker quality has gone up, and many cars now have bluetooth pairing.

// they tried to get into wearables, but that product category was already over saturated.

// I have a jawbone earpiece, I don't use it anymore (I switched jobs so don't need to take calls that often these days, plus, my current car has bluetooth pairing with my phone.)
 
2017-11-20 11:13:50 PM  

lordargent: arcgear: Wasn't jawbone that higher-end bluetooth heatset?

Headsets and earpieces, and they were one of the top tier brands in those product categories.

They have also been in business since 1999, so they don't really belong in the same group as juicero. They sold quality products that people wanted, at a fair price.

// the problem is that people aren't really buying bluetooth headsets for phones anymore. Phone mic and speaker quality has gone up, and many cars now have bluetooth pairing.

// they tried to get into wearables, but that product category was already over saturated.

// I have a jawbone earpiece, I don't use it anymore (I switched jobs so don't need to take calls that often these days, plus, my current car has bluetooth pairing with my phone.)


A lot of Bluetooth headsets are sold still, but most of them are stereo models built more for music, like AirPods or Jaybirds. Jawbone managed to miss out on that trend because they were too busy trying to be FitBit.
 
2017-11-20 11:19:39 PM  

Catlenfell: F'd Company used to be a favorite read of mine during the crash in 2000.
Always entertaining to watch some of the once touted niche companies slowly crash into reality.
No Pinksquirrel.com, you should not have spent $30M on your launch party. You ran out of funding 3 months later.


There should be a Vietnam-type memorial for that. List the names of all the employees of each company along with the # of stock options they accepted in lieu of pay.

/not personally bitter but plenty of friends were.
 
2017-11-20 11:32:59 PM  
Big deal.  I live next to an actual memorial of gay leather cruise bars in SF.
 
2017-11-20 11:35:03 PM  

gingerjet: Big deal.  I live next to an actual memorial of gay leather cruise bars in SF.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-11-20 11:50:36 PM  

wildcardjack: [Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/_Cp-BGQf​pHQ]

The only proper review of Juicero.


An interesting watch, and a fine example of how some companies will sell you a really nice thing at a loss if it means they can make a profit over time, giving them an eventual return on investment. Video game console companies do the same thing when they release a new console - sell hardware at less than the cost of production, then make it all back on the money you spend on software and online subscriptions.

I've said it before and I'll say it again - the preferred business model isn't to charge you a high price once, it's to charge you an affordable amount every month for the rest of your life.
 
2017-11-21 12:05:42 AM  

Marksrevenge: wildcardjack: [Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/_Cp-BGQf​pHQ]

The only proper review of Juicero.

An interesting watch, and a fine example of how some companies will sell you a really nice thing at a loss if it means they can make a profit over time, giving them an eventual return on investment. Video game console companies do the same thing when they release a new console - sell hardware at less than the cost of production, then make it all back on the money you spend on software and online subscriptions.

I've said it before and I'll say it again - the preferred business model isn't to charge you a high price once, it's to charge you an affordable amount every month for the rest of your life.


Okay, so the employment model is to hire expensive contractors and consultants for a brief time rather than keep affordable emploees around in an going basis, just the opposite of the business model. It's a mad world.
 
2017-11-21 12:17:01 AM  

wildcardjack: Marksrevenge: wildcardjack: [Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/_Cp-BGQf​pHQ]

The only proper review of Juicero.

An interesting watch, and a fine example of how some companies will sell you a really nice thing at a loss if it means they can make a profit over time, giving them an eventual return on investment. Video game console companies do the same thing when they release a new console - sell hardware at less than the cost of production, then make it all back on the money you spend on software and online subscriptions.

I've said it before and I'll say it again - the preferred business model isn't to charge you a high price once, it's to charge you an affordable amount every month for the rest of your life.

Okay, so the employment model is to hire expensive contractors and consultants for a brief time rather than keep affordable emploees around in an going basis, just the opposite of the business model. It's a mad world.


Sell one device at a loss to secure a steady revenue stream that will, over time, more than make up for the initial loss.
 
2017-11-21 12:28:15 AM  
i2.cdn.turner.comView Full Size
 
2017-11-21 12:48:34 AM  

lordargent: arcgear: Wasn't jawbone that higher-end bluetooth heatset?

Headsets and earpieces, and they were one of the top tier brands in those product categories.

They have also been in business since 1999, so they don't really belong in the same group as juicero. They sold quality products that people wanted, at a fair price.

// the problem is that people aren't really buying bluetooth headsets for phones anymore. Phone mic and speaker quality has gone up, and many cars now have bluetooth pairing.

// they tried to get into wearables, but that product category was already over saturated.

// I have a jawbone earpiece, I don't use it anymore (I switched jobs so don't need to take calls that often these days, plus, my current car has bluetooth pairing with my phone.)


The death of those devices is perhaps a win for basic etiquette.  Still won't stop most slobs from jabbering on their phones while walking about in crowded areas, but it seems like doing so has been deterred by those headsets falling out of style.

Maybe the reason the company started rotting away was due to people realizing that nobody wants to hear others yammering aloud while walking next to them?  Consideration for others...yeah...wishful thinking.  Hard to believe that advancements with the internal mic solely killed off the demand, though.

/years ago, had friends who would carry on blueooth headset people's conversations aloud when trapped in public spaces with them.
//yeah, rudeness to rudeness isn't a good philosophy
 
2017-11-21 01:07:42 AM  

wildcardjack: [YouTube video: BOLTR: Juicero, Cold Press Juicer for Rich Weirdos]

The only proper review of Juicero.


The only proper review of anything.
 
2017-11-21 03:37:08 AM  

Catlenfell: F'd Company used to be a favorite read of mine during the crash in 2000.


F'd Company was where I first heard of Fark and indeed it was a link in a message thread that sent me to Fark for the first time.
 
2017-11-21 04:48:46 AM  

arcgear: Maybe the reason the company started rotting away was due to people realizing that nobody wants to hear others yammering aloud while walking next to them?


I used mine primarily to take phone calls while commuting. I sometimes used it while waiting for folks ... but I would stand away from people, and I definitely never used it while in a store or anything like that.

// what killed them is that people today don't seem to care that people can hear their business and the speakerphones on smartphones are a lot better than the brick phones.

// jawbone tried to pivot into wearables, but fitbit stomped on them. I think jawbone only ever had about 3% of the wearables market.
 
2017-11-21 05:52:16 AM  

WhyteRaven74: Catlenfell: F'd Company used to be a favorite read of mine during the crash in 2000.

F'd Company was where I first heard of Fark and indeed it was a link in a message thread that sent me to Fark for the first time.


You know, I was wondering how I stumbled upon this site, and that's probably it. Wonder what Pud is up to these days.
 
2017-11-21 07:49:52 AM  
Jawbone had good years as the leader in Bluetooth earpieces and speakers. Not sure why anybody thinks it belongs in a category with Juicero.
 
2017-11-21 10:19:32 AM  

jaytkay: Jawbone had good years as the leader in Bluetooth earpieces and speakers. Not sure why anybody thinks it belongs in a category with Juicero.


Yea they were a reasonably successful company until they bet the farm trying to compete with Fitbit.
 
wee
2017-11-21 10:19:40 AM  
wildcardjack:

The only proper review of Juicero.

It definitely chooched!
 
2017-11-21 11:51:55 AM  

lordargent: arcgear: Maybe the reason the company started rotting away was due to people realizing that nobody wants to hear others yammering aloud while walking next to them?

I used mine primarily to take phone calls while commuting. I sometimes used it while waiting for folks ... but I would stand away from people, and I definitely never used it while in a store or anything like that.

// what killed them is that people today don't seem to care that people can hear their business and the speakerphones on smartphones are a lot better than the brick phones.

// jawbone tried to pivot into wearables, but fitbit stomped on them. I think jawbone only ever had about 3% of the wearables market.


Makes sense.  It was bound to be a doomed model at any rate; the garbageware that ships with smortfones offers most every function a wearable does, and without the hassle of strapping it to your body.

Hell, they have android-interfaced apps to remap ICE ECUs nowadays.  Still no cure for acting like a douche, unfortunately
 
2017-11-21 02:15:57 PM  

Dead for Tax Reasons: [img.fark.net image 496x200]

no, no you won't


Ive got a Kozmo.com timbuk2 messenger bag somewhere. They sold off the unused production run after it tanked.
Also, the former pets.com HQ is the SF REI store.
Get off my lawn.
 
2017-11-21 03:22:14 PM  

Harry_Seldon: [i2.cdn.turner.com image 340x256][View Full Size image _x_]


Yes! Flooz. That was the first thing I thought of.

CSB:

I got $10 in free Flooz because some random message board I signed up for but didn't even remember sent it to me. Used it to get a 12" vinyl single of "The Day the Whole World Went Away" from Tower Records. It was under $10 with shipping because high school me didn't have a credit card.

/end csb.
 
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