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(Daily Mail)   Fresh mystery as inquest into death of street light conspiracy theorist who vomited two litres of black blinker fluid is delayed without reason   ( dailymail.co.uk) divider line
    More: Weird, Amie Gordon, Gordon model, EST, Mailonline  
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2534 clicks; posted to Geek » on 07 Nov 2017 at 10:34 PM (36 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



39 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2017-11-07 06:12:58 PM  
So a conspiracy theorist dies and his mother suspects a conspiracy. Turns out the saying is true: The apple doesn't fall far from the UFO.
 
2017-11-07 06:25:26 PM  
I want to bereave.
 
2017-11-07 06:47:47 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-11-07 08:43:15 PM  

AdmirableSnackbar: I want to bereave.


Threads done, folks.
 
2017-11-07 09:12:04 PM  
forked_at_fark died?  Oh no, what happened...
 
2017-11-07 09:32:12 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-11-07 10:43:47 PM  
How do they know it was blood?

Was it his blood?

Type Bfor black?
 
2017-11-07 10:53:02 PM  

ArthurVandelay: How do they know it was blood?

Was it his blood?

Type Bfor black?


That's what I'm thinking. Lots of blood that's been partially digested. When I have a nosebleed while sleeping I'll swallow it and pay for it in the morning. The indigestion is really terrible and apt to make one vomit.
 
2017-11-07 11:05:00 PM  
digested blood turns black
bleeding ulcers suck

guys a douche and douched one too many times
 
2017-11-07 11:19:41 PM  

kvinesknows: digested blood turns black
bleeding ulcers suck

guys a douche and douched one too many times


he was probably snorting powdered aluminum or drinking some crazy cleanse to keep the rothschilds from reading his chakra
 
2017-11-07 11:33:53 PM  
For people that love to rag on 'boot lickers' that believe cops, you sure all sign up for the government news letter when it comes to things where the government can't be challenged on.
 
2017-11-07 11:44:30 PM  
Croaked conspiracy theorist?

No loss.
 
2017-11-07 11:46:07 PM  

Kittypie070: Croaked conspiracy theorist?

No loss.


Or is it?
*cue spooky music*
 
2017-11-07 11:53:44 PM  

tlchwi02: kvinesknows: digested blood turns black
bleeding ulcers suck

guys a douche and douched one too many times

he was probably snorting powdered aluminum or drinking some crazy cleanse to keep the rothschilds from reading his chakra


Man that made me think candy bar.  Why?
 
2017-11-08 12:00:53 AM  
What is blinker fluid?
 
2017-11-08 12:11:56 AM  

almejita: tlchwi02: kvinesknows: digested blood turns black
bleeding ulcers suck

guys a douche and douched one too many times

he was probably snorting powdered aluminum or drinking some crazy cleanse to keep the rothschilds from reading his chakra

Man that made me think candy bar.  Why?


Not now! I'm right in the middle of a....
 
2017-11-08 12:14:25 AM  

Stibium: ArthurVandelay: How do they know it was blood?

Was it his blood?

Type Bfor black?

That's what I'm thinking. Lots of blood that's been partially digested. When I have a nosebleed while sleeping I'll swallow it and pay for it in the morning. The indigestion is really terrible and apt to make one vomit.


2 liters of it?  DNRTFA
 
2017-11-08 12:24:42 AM  

Igor Jakovsky: Stibium: ArthurVandelay: How do they know it was blood?

Was it his blood?

Type Bfor black?

That's what I'm thinking. Lots of blood that's been partially digested. When I have a nosebleed while sleeping I'll swallow it and pay for it in the morning. The indigestion is really terrible and apt to make one vomit.

2 liters of it?  DNRTFA


I'm pretty sure I've thrown up around 2L of beer and water before. And how does one quantify an amount of mystery fluid on the ground? Do they stake a giant planimeter and trace it out and multiply by the average standing depth? It could have just as likely been 1L, right?

But yea, if he had some serious ulcers that could reasonably put out at least that much blood.
 
2017-11-08 01:00:27 AM  
It was in Poland. If the Illuminati/whomever want to off a guy, they're just going to have him shot in a 'botched robbery' or something. They're not going to make him vomit up two litres of black liquid or whatnot. If we assume said Illuminati are so all-powerful, we should at least give them credit for not being farking stupid.
 
2017-11-08 01:39:26 AM  
In before the lupus....
 
2017-11-08 02:04:03 AM  

Gordon Bennett: What is blinker fluid?


It's the fluid that you put in your car's blinkers to keep them working properly. If you've never changed your car's blinker fluid, you're running the risk of a blowout that disables your blinkers. You should probably go to an auto parts store and ask for a couple quarts of blinker fluid; it's not hard to add the fluid yourself at home.
 
2017-11-08 02:33:30 AM  
As an aside, Pepto Bismol turns black in the presence of sulfur.
 
2017-11-08 02:45:46 AM  

wildcardjack: As an aside, Pepto Bismol turns black in the presence of sulfur.


Bananas turn black in the presence of time.

Checkmate.
 
2017-11-08 04:03:54 AM  

RoyFokker'sGhost: Gordon Bennett: What is blinker fluid?

It's the fluid that you put in your car's blinkers to keep them working properly. If you've never changed your car's blinker fluid, you're running the risk of a blowout that disables your blinkers. You should probably go to an auto parts store and ask for a couple quarts of blinker fluid; it's not hard to add the fluid yourself at home.


Ask for the stealth blend.  There's a reason old timey cars had an audible noise when the blinker was going.  It was because it was before this stuff hit the shelves.  Don't get the old stuff.
 
2017-11-08 04:48:08 AM  

AdmirableSnackbar: I want to bereave.


Thats it, right there. Pack it up kids.
 
2017-11-08 05:10:20 AM  

RoyFokker'sGhost: Gordon Bennett: What is blinker fluid?

It's the fluid that you put in your car's blinkers to keep them working properly. If you've never changed your car's blinker fluid, you're running the risk of a blowout that disables your blinkers. You should probably go to an auto parts store and ask for a couple quarts of blinker fluid; it's not hard to add the fluid yourself at home.


Oh. Thank you.

What are my car's blinkers?
 
2017-11-08 05:20:11 AM  
Gordon Bennett:
What are my car's blinkers?

If the car has Lucas electrics, you'll never know. In which case, the salesman will have told you that little stalk to the left is for hanging your spare keys on.
 
2017-11-08 05:27:29 AM  

BafflerMeal: wildcardjack: As an aside, Pepto Bismol turns black in the presence of sulfur.

Bananas turn black in the presence of time.

Checkmate.


It's not easy facing up when your whole world is black
 
2017-11-08 05:49:40 AM  

Gordon Bennett: What is blinker fluid?


You'll find it in a hardware store, ine aisle down from the left handed adjustable wrenches and the board stretchers.
 
2017-11-08 06:07:15 AM  

swamp_of_dumb: Gordon Bennett: What is blinker fluid?

You'll find it in a hardware store, ine aisle down from the left handed adjustable wrenches and the board stretchers.


They moved it. It's now next to the glass hammers and tartan paint.
 
2017-11-08 06:13:18 AM  

weapon13: swamp_of_dumb: Gordon Bennett: What is blinker fluid?

You'll find it in a hardware store, ine aisle down from the left handed adjustable wrenches and the board stretchers.

They moved it. It's now next to the glass hammers and tartan paint.


Near the solar-powered flashlights and the snipe hunting gear?
 
2017-11-08 06:46:44 AM  

docmattic: weapon13: swamp_of_dumb: Gordon Bennett: What is blinker fluid?

You'll find it in a hardware store, ine aisle down from the left handed adjustable wrenches and the board stretchers.

They moved it. It's now next to the glass hammers and tartan paint.

Near the solar-powered flashlights and the snipe hunting gear?


Right by the chemlight batteries and the bottles of prop wash.
 
2017-11-08 06:48:08 AM  

erewhon: docmattic: weapon13: swamp_of_dumb: Gordon Bennett: What is blinker fluid?

You'll find it in a hardware store, ine aisle down from the left handed adjustable wrenches and the board stretchers.

They moved it. It's now next to the glass hammers and tartan paint.

Near the solar-powered flashlights and the snipe hunting gear?

Right by the chemlight batteries and the bottles of prop wash.


And if you don't see it, look for the boxes of grid squares. The platoon sergeant needs some.
 
2017-11-08 07:24:13 AM  

erewhon: erewhon: docmattic: weapon13: swamp_of_dumb: Gordon Bennett: What is blinker fluid?

You'll find it in a hardware store, ine aisle down from the left handed adjustable wrenches and the board stretchers.

They moved it. It's now next to the glass hammers and tartan paint.

Near the solar-powered flashlights and the snipe hunting gear?

Right by the chemlight batteries and the bottles of prop wash.

And if you don't see it, look for the boxes of grid squares. The platoon sergeant needs some.


Take a left turn past the plumbing isle, just watch out for the fallopian tubes.
 
2017-11-08 08:07:31 AM  

Cpl.D: erewhon: erewhon: docmattic: weapon13: swamp_of_dumb: Gordon Bennett: What is blinker fluid?

You'll find it in a hardware store, ine aisle down from the left handed adjustable wrenches and the board stretchers.

They moved it. It's now next to the glass hammers and tartan paint.

Near the solar-powered flashlights and the snipe hunting gear?

Right by the chemlight batteries and the bottles of prop wash.

And if you don't see it, look for the boxes of grid squares. The platoon sergeant needs some.

Take a left turn past the plumbing isle, just watch out for the fallopian tubes.


I need a bucket of steam and some shaft seal kibble.
 
2017-11-08 08:51:22 AM  

tlchwi02: kvinesknows: digested blood turns black
bleeding ulcers suck

guys a douche and douched one too many times

he was probably snorting powdered aluminum or drinking some crazy cleanse to keep the rothschilds from reading his chakra


Probably just gave himself and ulcer by worry about UFOs all the time.
 
2017-11-08 11:30:59 AM  
To be fair, vomiting black blood is probably how I'd want to go if I were a UFO conspiracy theorist.  It just seems appropriate somehow.
 
2017-11-08 12:27:31 PM  

BafflerMeal: wildcardjack: As an aside, Pepto Bismol turns black in the presence of sulfur.

Bananas turn black in the presence of time.

Checkmate.


Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. ONE UP YO DAWG!
 
2017-11-08 02:42:33 PM  

wood0366: Cpl.D: erewhon: erewhon: docmattic: weapon13: swamp_of_dumb: Gordon Bennett: What is blinker fluid?

You'll find it in a hardware store, ine aisle down from the left handed adjustable wrenches and the board stretchers.

They moved it. It's now next to the glass hammers and tartan paint.

Near the solar-powered flashlights and the snipe hunting gear?

Right by the chemlight batteries and the bottles of prop wash.

And if you don't see it, look for the boxes of grid squares. The platoon sergeant needs some.

Take a left turn past the plumbing isle, just watch out for the fallopian tubes.

I need a bucket of steam and some shaft seal kibble.


You're gonna need to grab the keys to the drop zone to get access to that.
 
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