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(Gizmodo)   "C-c-can y-y-you h-h-hear m-m-me n-n-now?"   (gizmodo.com) divider line
    More: Giggity  
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3648 clicks; posted to Geek » on 22 Sep 2017 at 9:23 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



37 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2017-09-22 4:29:20 PM  
Exactly what i wanted on my medical records

"Dick caught in cellular telephone"

Suppose that's better than "dick caught in venus mantrap" as my last mentioning of that, ex wouldn't speak to me for a week :(
 
2017-09-22 5:01:42 PM  

arcgear: Exactly what i wanted on my medical records

"Dick caught in cellular telephone"

Suppose that's better than "dick caught in venus mantrap" as my last mentioning of that, ex wouldn't speak to me for a week :(


Just use the ICD-10 codes instead of writing out the full description. There's no shame in having a W55.29XD on your chart.
 
2017-09-22 8:50:07 PM  

arcgear: Exactly what i wanted on my medical records

"Dick caught in cellular telephone"

Suppose that's better than "dick caught in venus mantrap" as my last mentioning of that, ex wouldn't speak to me for a week :(


I'm not sure where you think you're putting your dick in that phone.

Good luck.
 
2017-09-22 8:54:06 PM  
I always get the "Can you hear me now" guy confused with the Subway pederast. This isn't helping.
 
2017-09-22 9:09:10 PM  
Plus, you'll be helping prevent terrorists from making bombs if you use old Nokias as vibes

img.fark.netView Full Size


/Don't let the terrorists win
 
2017-09-22 9:27:56 PM  
the IT crowd- roys phone
Youtube ZQKPTo59v3s
 
2017-09-22 9:29:49 PM  
Yet if you are in the market for a simple, small, discreet vibrator with long-lasting battery power, you don't need to troll the web for a Nokia 3310. A simple bullet vibe or the Iroha Mini by Tenga will get you off without maybe your labia accidentally calling your Aunt Karen (you'll need to be on T-Mobile as it's the only 2G network still working in the US). It's got one low profile on-off button and a battery life of 5 hours powered by a single AAA, but it does lack the sure multitude of vibration pattern options. Still the Iroha Mini is affordable, cute, and you can take it in the bathtub without having to imagine a bunch of firefighters discussing why on earth you decided to hump your Nokia while letting Calgon take you away.

I believe Drew wrote a book about this in a chapter titled "Advertising masquerading as an article. But I'm going to give it a pass with its description of trying to get the phone  into her pussy.
 
2017-09-22 9:30:25 PM  
The Dualshock2 and a cheat code or two was doing that 15 years ago.
 
2017-09-22 9:32:08 PM  

Flappyhead: The Dualshock2 and a cheat code or two was doing that 15 years ago.


And the bonus of two joy-sticks.
 
2017-09-22 9:35:28 PM  
So, Rebeca Stokes will put a Nokia up her snatch. She had my interest...
 
2017-09-22 9:39:19 PM  
The phone isn't waterproof and while I had no plans to take it into the tub with me, I did allow myself some anxiety over what would happen if the phone electrocuted me during the act.

Just put a condom over it. That also solves any cleanup problems.
 
2017-09-22 9:40:42 PM  
Worked in the cellular industry, and those lines of Nokias were still standard when I started. There was a program for them called, iirc, Purring Kitty that let you program in a vibration pattern to repeat and sustain until you turned it off. Had to explain more than once that, no, that's not usage covered under warranty and no, I'm not going to troubleshoot your phone any more, because I had to go boil my hands. Things only got worse in the smartphone era...
 
2017-09-22 9:41:44 PM  

fusillade762: The phone isn't waterproof and while I had no plans to take it into the tub with me, I did allow myself some anxiety over what would happen if the phone electrocuted me during the act.

Just put a condom over it. That also solves any cleanup problems.


Not as tactile as bareback.
 
2017-09-22 9:44:14 PM  

davidphogan: arcgear: Exactly what i wanted on my medical records

"Dick caught in cellular telephone"

Suppose that's better than "dick caught in venus mantrap" as my last mentioning of that, ex wouldn't speak to me for a week :(

I'm not sure where you think you're putting your dick in that phone.

Good luck.


Does it have a headphone jack?
 
2017-09-22 9:54:03 PM  

fusillade762: The phone isn't waterproof and while I had no plans to take it into the tub with me, I did allow myself some anxiety over what would happen if the phone electrocuted me during the act.

Just put a condom over it. That also solves any cleanup problems.


Honestly I don't think they'd be asking for it back afterwards (unless the one asking for it is a perv).
 
2017-09-22 9:54:37 PM  
is this a surprise? anybody who has set their phone down and had it slide into their crotch has accidentalyl experienced this.
kids these days... everything is new to them.
 
2017-09-22 10:11:45 PM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2017-09-22 10:15:57 PM  
Need pics to know if I need video. . .

/And now the thread will be filled with pics of Nokia phones. . .
 
2017-09-22 10:20:24 PM  

arcgear: Exactly what i wanted on my medical records

"Dick caught in cellular telephone"

Suppose that's better than "dick caught in venus mantrap" as my last mentioning of that, ex wouldn't speak to me for a week :(


Well it's probably better than "Extracted from rectum."
 
2017-09-22 10:20:53 PM  
"That, my friends, is exactly why I decided to throw caution to the wind and stick my old Nokia 3310 into my vagina. In the interest of full disclosure, it wasn't actually 'my' old Nokia 3310,"

When I read the second sentence, my brain autocompleted it as "it wasn't actually my vagina" and my interest was briefly heightened.
 
2017-09-22 10:21:34 PM  
Anything's a dildo if you're brave enough

static.businessinsider.comView Full Size
 
2017-09-22 10:26:01 PM  
cdn.pastemagazine.comView Full Size
 
2017-09-22 10:40:04 PM  

UncleDirtNap: arcgear: Exactly what i wanted on my medical records

"Dick caught in cellular telephone"

Suppose that's better than "dick caught in venus mantrap" as my last mentioning of that, ex wouldn't speak to me for a week :(

Well it's probably better than "Extracted from rectum."


T18.5XXA
 
2017-09-22 10:41:22 PM  

UncleDirtNap: arcgear: Exactly what i wanted on my medical records

"Dick caught in cellular telephone"

Suppose that's better than "dick caught in venus mantrap" as my last mentioning of that, ex wouldn't speak to me for a week :(

Well it's probably better than "Extracted from rectum."


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-09-22 10:42:43 PM  

UncleDirtNap: arcgear: Exactly what i wanted on my medical records

"Dick caught in cellular telephone"

Suppose that's better than "dick caught in venus mantrap" as my last mentioning of that, ex wouldn't speak to me for a week :(

Well it's probably better than "Extracted from rectum."


Or more to the point:

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-09-22 10:44:27 PM  
The ass box
Youtube ySd-MYoOFo4
 
2017-09-22 10:50:17 PM  

Flappyhead: The Dualshock2 and a cheat code or two was doing that 15 years ago.


Or just get a copy of Rez.
 
2017-09-22 11:27:48 PM  
"Why won't she answer my calls?"
 
2017-09-23 1:17:29 AM  
Old news.
spacebison.comView Full Size
 
2017-09-23 1:52:19 AM  
"Thanks for the loaner, Gizmodo, here's your phone back."

"Uh, no that's fine, you keep it."
 
2017-09-23 2:04:12 AM  

jayfurr: UncleDirtNap: arcgear: Exactly what i wanted on my medical records

"Dick caught in cellular telephone"

Suppose that's better than "dick caught in venus mantrap" as my last mentioning of that, ex wouldn't speak to me for a week :(

Well it's probably better than "Extracted from rectum."

Or more to the point:

[img.fark.net image 300x223]


If that's what i think it is, someone at last devised a practical use for the blackberry handset

Good on 'em
 
2017-09-23 3:02:00 AM  

Sydney Bridges: Anything's a dildo if you're brave enough

[static.businessinsider.com image 462x539]


scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.netView Full Size
 
2017-09-23 5:23:08 AM  

NeoCortex42: Flappyhead: The Dualshock2 and a cheat code or two was doing that 15 years ago.

Or just get a copy of Rez.


Crap, how did I forget that game?
 
2017-09-23 9:55:21 AM  
Meh.  I found that out when I got my first Nokia.  But I'm a dude.
 
2017-09-23 10:56:51 AM  
Yeah, Paul, you're the born-again Verizon spokesman who now pitches Sprint....big f*cking deal;
you want a medal or something? (And what if T-Mobile shoves a bigger bucket of loot under your
schnozz?)
 
2017-09-23 12:51:13 PM  
Oh, I thought phone sex was something else.
 
2017-09-23 3:29:25 PM  
img00.deviantart.netView Full Size


2 ??

jayfurr:

[img.fark.net image 425x425]
 
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