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(Bloomberg)   After voting against aid for Hurricane Sandy cleanup and cleanup for Flint, MI, Texas Sen Ted Cruz is suddenly very much in favor of federal help with Hurricane Harvey assistance. Because of course he is   ( bloomberg.com) divider line
    More: Murica, Hurricane Katrina, Sandy aid package, Senators John Cornyn, Cornyn spokesman Drew, George W. Bush, deep spending cuts, Hurricane Harvey, extra storm relief  
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2917 clicks; posted to Politics » on 26 Aug 2017 at 9:50 AM (38 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



220 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2017-08-26 08:02:25 AM  
What an obvious, oblivious twat.
 
2017-08-26 08:11:01 AM  
Fark you, give me mine!
 
2017-08-26 08:19:15 AM  
I saw him and his speed bag farking face bleating on about how much he cares about the people of Texas and of course he's praying for them.
 
2017-08-26 08:28:12 AM  
Ted Cruz: "Help for me, but none for you!"

In other words, water is wet.
 
2017-08-26 08:43:39 AM  

Mugato: I saw him and his speed bag farking face bleating on about how much he cares about the people of Texas and of course he's praying for them.


In order to maximize the efficacy of his prayers, and as a demonstration of his faith in the lovingkindness of his god, he needs to go right down into Austin and get in Harvey's face.
 
2017-08-26 08:48:50 AM  
If you like, subby, I can go back to the threads covering those events and count the number of Farkers who said he would do exactly that, but I'm pretty sure the answer is "all of them".
 
2017-08-26 08:55:18 AM  
Requesting aid for his state is an important part of his job.
Voting against aid for others in need is an important part of his character.
Senator Rafael Eduardo Cruz is a dickhead.
 
2017-08-26 09:10:20 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-08-26 09:20:21 AM  
He is such an evil, condescending scum weasel that even Republicans hate him.

So perhaps it is moderately surprising that he supports aid to his home state.

I mean, seriously, is it entirely out of character to expect him to say, "Oh fark Texas, what have they ever done for me?"
 
2017-08-26 09:22:29 AM  
Texas deserves help. But Cruz should be made to explain why the rest of the country should help Texas when Texas didn't want to help the rest of the country.

I know, I know. He'll never have to do that. But it would be nice.
 
2017-08-26 09:29:05 AM  
Fark off Ted.  Why don't you pray for aid.
 
2017-08-26 09:45:40 AM  

Jake Havechek: Fark off Ted.  Why don't you pray for aid.


I was going to point out that if they had prayed harder, the hurricane wouldn't have hit them.  They must have done something to deserve this.  Helping them afterward might make God angry.
 
2017-08-26 09:55:56 AM  

Jake Havechek: Fark off Ted.  Why don't you pray for aids.


FTFY
 
2017-08-26 09:56:14 AM  

Gubbo: Texas deserves help. But Cruz should be made to explain why the rest of the country should help Texas when Texas didn't want to help the rest of the country.

I know, I know. He'll never have to do that. But it would be nice.


The whole point of Texas is "look at how bootstrappy we are with our lone rugged individualism" until a hurricane or wild fire outbreak happens, and then there's a lot of cowboy crying about needing federal help.
 
2017-08-26 09:56:54 AM  
I thought Texas wanted to depart from the US? Perhaps they can get a trial run of what it would be like if they had to help themselves. Nah, that would be cruel.
 
2017-08-26 09:57:19 AM  
Oh he has a soul now? That's one hell of a flip-flop.
 
2017-08-26 10:00:26 AM  

Gubbo: Texas deserves help. But Cruz should be made to explain why the rest of the country should help Texas when Texas didn't want to help the rest of the country.

I know, I know. He'll never have to do that. But it would be nice.


Not sure anybody in the GOP could justify that without making things sound socialist.  Then again, this is also a great allegory for how he and some of the GOP feel about health insurance.  My thought is that if Texas did not want to contribute to the relief for Hurricane Sandy or Flint, then they should not get relief for daamages sustained due to Hurricane Harvey.
 
2017-08-26 10:01:23 AM  
Why should a healthy state pay for a state that gets sick? Maybe Texas should have saved more money or got a better job.
 
2017-08-26 10:02:16 AM  
That's not very bootstrappy of you, Ted. But asswipes gonna be asswipes.
 
2017-08-26 10:03:44 AM  
On Teds home planet they don't have hurricanes or even an atmosphere. It might be he didn't understand what happened the first time. Alien invasions don't always go smoothly, give him a break.
 
2017-08-26 10:03:50 AM  
The Zodiac Killer should be careful. JFK's killer may come after him for being a lying hypocrite.
 
2017-08-26 10:03:58 AM  

Gubbo: Texas deserves help. But Cruz should be made to explain why the rest of the country should help Texas when Texas didn't want to help the rest of the country.


Came here to say this.

I want to give aid to Texas because they're Americans who need and deserve our help, but let's talk about that after Ted Cruz literally gets down on his f*cking knees in the well of the senate and begs forgiveness from all the victims he's tried to abandon in the past.
 
2017-08-26 10:04:40 AM  
Hey, man, I am sending a metric assload of thoughts and prayers, which is the currency of the GOP realm.
 
2017-08-26 10:05:16 AM  
Ted Cruz is a hypocrite?  The Hell you say...
 
2017-08-26 10:06:10 AM  

fat_free: Hey, man, I am sending a metric assload of thoughts and prayers, which is the currency of the GOP realm.


i.redd.itView Full Size
 
2017-08-26 10:06:23 AM  

snowshovel: Gubbo: Texas deserves help. But Cruz should be made to explain why the rest of the country should help Texas when Texas didn't want to help the rest of the country.

I know, I know. He'll never have to do that. But it would be nice.

The whole point of Texas is "look at how bootstrappy we are with our lone rugged individualism" until a hurricane or wild fire outbreak happens, and then there's a lot of cowboy crying about needing federal help.


Between natural disasters, federal assistance, and Branch Dildonians, it seems as if the "crying cowboy" image is a lot more realistic than all that "bootstrappy tough-guy" stuff they prefer.
 
2017-08-26 10:07:46 AM  
My first thought is that Ted should be made to kiss every other Senators ass, on both cheeks, before they eventually agree to aid. But then there's that thing about cruel and unusual punishment and I don't think that 99 Senators should be subjected to that.
 
2017-08-26 10:09:37 AM  
I'm sure he didn't want to end up like David Vitter who decided to work harder on a doomed gay-marriage bill instead of, oh, I don't know, FIX HIS STATE AFTER KATRINA.
 
2017-08-26 10:11:06 AM  
Here's my question: which part of Texas is being hit? Is it the quirky yet pleasant Ly sensible Austin-like folks, or the Secessionist, screw the poor, Fark America, ZOMG Jade Helm11!! Folks?  If it's the latter, every federal dollar they get should come with a finger wag.
 
2017-08-26 10:12:08 AM  

rjakobi: I'm sure he didn't want to end up like David Vitter who decided to work harder on a doomed gay-marriage bill instead of, oh, I don't know, FIX HIS STATE AFTER KATRINA.


To be fair, most of the damage came with Rita.
 
2017-08-26 10:12:34 AM  

Gubbo: Texas deserves help.


While this is true, Texas also deserves Ted Cruz.
 
2017-08-26 10:15:29 AM  
I hope his house blows away with him in it.
 
2017-08-26 10:16:50 AM  
I do not want to deny the people of Texas aid out of political vindictiveness. However, I do think Cruz should be required by law to seppuku in order for Texas to receive funding
 
2017-08-26 10:17:33 AM  
TEXAS: Proving once again it's the whiny little biatch of America.
 
2017-08-26 10:17:57 AM  

anustart: Here's my question: which part of Texas is being hit? Is it the quirky yet pleasant Ly sensible Austin-like folks, or the Secessionist, screw the poor, Fark America, ZOMG Jade Helm11!! Folks?  If it's the latter, every federal dollar they get should come with a finger wag.


It's the part that legally belongs to Mexico but we refuse to return it to the rightful owners
 
2017-08-26 10:21:37 AM  
Dear Chris Christie,
You know how you're a giant spiteful asshole?  Can you cough up some of that douchebaggery when Ted Cruz comes a-callin' with his moochin' sack in hand?  That would be great.

Thanks!
Residents of NJ, past and present
 
2017-08-26 10:22:09 AM  
As a resident of New Jersey, I will defer to Seantor Cory Booker, whose remarks on this will likely speak to his eagerness to help the people of Texas, while reflecting on his disappointment that the Senators from Texas did not show the same level of eagerness when his state was dealing with disaster.

He'll do this all with level of maturity and reason I would not quite be capable of if I was in his situation, where I would likely walk up to Ted Cruz on the Senate floor, and literally piss on him.
 
2017-08-26 10:22:12 AM  
I would love if someone just quoted Cruz for why they vote against this.

But 1. That might lead to people who need help not getting it

2. The echo chamber would just point out how terrible those staments are without pointing out that it was his own words
 
2017-08-26 10:22:38 AM  

ViolentEastCoastCity: Dear Chris Christie,
You know how you're a giant spiteful asshole?  Can you cough up some of that douchebaggery when Ted Cruz comes a-callin' with his moochin' sack in hand?  That would be great.

Thanks!
Residents of NJ, past and present


Second.
 
2017-08-26 10:23:22 AM  
Also, there are way too many animal shelters in Texas who spent yesterday murdering all their animals instead of evacuating them.  What the F*CK is wrong with these people?  No aid for you, dipsh*ts.  You psychotic assbags.
 
2017-08-26 10:23:31 AM  

thismomentinblackhistory: Oh he has a soul now? That's one hell of a flip-flop.


He's always had one. It's just all shrivelled, moldy, and usually stored in a box at the back of a closet somewhere.
 
2017-08-26 10:23:51 AM  
Hurricane Sandy was barely a hurricane when it made landfall. It was a fat cash cow for politicians looking to book the feds for everything from legit cleanup to pet projects. Demanding politicians not bilk taxpayers under the guise of an emergency is a valid concern.

This is an actual major hurricane that will do far more legit damage.
 
2017-08-26 10:25:05 AM  

ViolentEastCoastCity: Dear Chris Christie,
You know how you're a giant spiteful asshole?  Can you cough up some of that douchebaggery when Ted Cruz comes a-callin' with his moochin' sack in hand?  That would be great.

Thanks!
Residents of NJ, past and present


You absolutely should send that as an actual letter. With an envelope and a stamp and everything, because those get the most attention. And be sure to let us all know if you get a response.
 
2017-08-26 10:25:23 AM  
Should disaster ridden Texans be punished because they have an asshole as a Senator?

/they did vote for him, after all
 
2017-08-26 10:25:53 AM  

Mugato: I saw him and his speed bag farking face bleating on about how much he cares about the people of Texas and of course he's praying for them.


You know how he could help, he could go check to make sure the statue of Selena is ok
 
2017-08-26 10:25:54 AM  

RJReves: Mugato: I saw him and his speed bag farking face bleating on about how much he cares about the people of Texas and of course he's praying for them.

In order to maximize the efficacy of his prayers, and as a demonstration of his faith in the lovingkindness of his god, he needs to go right down into Austin and get in Harvey's face.


Not that I disagree with him sprinting naked into a hurricane, but Austin is basically just getting rain right now.
 
2017-08-26 10:26:58 AM  

Mrbogey: Hurricane Sandy was barely a hurricane when it made landfall. It was a fat cash cow for politicians looking to book the feds for everything from legit cleanup to pet projects. Demanding politicians not bilk taxpayers under the guise of an emergency is a valid concern.

This is an actual major hurricane that will do far more legit damage.


If it's a legitimate hurricane, the state of Texas has ways of shutting it down.
 
2017-08-26 10:28:16 AM  

Mrbogey: Hurricane Sandy was barely a hurricane when it made landfall. It was a fat cash cow for politicians looking to book the feds for everything from legit cleanup to pet projects. Demanding politicians not bilk taxpayers under the guise of an emergency is a valid concern.

This is an actual major hurricane that will do far more legit damage.


Yup Sandy only did 75 billion in damage and killed 233 people.  No big deal.

Go fark yourself.
 
2017-08-26 10:28:25 AM  
Before any federal money is released, Cruz should stand before Congress, put his head between his legs, and kiss his own ass.
 
2017-08-26 10:28:51 AM  

Mrbogey: Hurricane Sandy was barely a hurricane when it made landfall. It was a fat cash cow for politicians looking to book the feds for everything from legit cleanup to pet projects. Demanding politicians not bilk taxpayers under the guise of an emergency is a valid concern.

This is an actual major hurricane that will do far more legit damage.


They should pray harder, then. Let us all know how it works out, okay? Or not - frankly I don't really care.
 
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